My biggest enemy was myself.

This was the sort of thing you'd read in young adult books, or watch on an after-school special. This was a theme for an episode of a Disney show. This was something that 'all teens go through' and I should know that 'I wasn't alone in going through this.'

I found it almost pathetic that it applied to me.

I remembered watching television and thinking how stupid everyone's problems were. Tammy was too self conscious to tell Timmy she loved him. John was self destructive and he was the only reason he couldn't do what he wanted to do. Jack could never love anyone until he loved himself. It all seemed so stupid, so easily fixable.

And yet I was just as bad as those television clichés.

I realized this when I was spending the next few days with Glenn. Despite my realization that I had nothing to worry about with him, I still managed think far too much.

Now, instead of worrying that touching him would make him uncomfortable, I was starting to think that I was becoming exactly what I had grown to hate ever since the walkers showed up; A horny asshole.

Sure, I'd had fantasies about Glenn before, and sure, they weren't exactly family friendly, but I at least left them for when he wasn't right in front of me. I was having full on pornographic thoughts about Glenn, and I didn't even have the decency to wait for him to leave my immediate vicinity first.

What was worse, I now actually had permission to act on those fantasies.

What was even worse; I couldn't bring myself to do any of it.

I was starting to feel completely two-faced and absolutely insane. The apocalypse happened too fast. If it had just waited a few months, I could have sorted out and been done with all of these shitty high school mentality problems. If it had just waited until I graduated, I could have been through with these idiotic self esteem issues. I could have slept with Glenn multiple times. I could have been someone he couldn't live without, instead of someone who was a constant burden on him.

"What are you worrying about?" He asked suddenly after a particularly long break in conversation. We were sitting on the grass a little ways away from camp. He was laying back on the grass looking up at me whereas I sat up with my legs crossed.

I was surprised he noticed. And a little flattered that he was paying so much attention.

"I'm having trouble deciding whether to listen to my dick or listen to my brain," I admitted, whispering in a feeble attempt to save my vocal chords. "And I'm thinking too much."

"Well... Stop thinking, for one," he said, holding up his finger at me as though it were a warning. "As for your other problem, maybe you should have told me about that when we first met."

I laughed

"Figuratively speaking."

"Well," he said, sitting up a little, leaning on his forearms. "What's your dick telling you to do?"

"Oh, I'm not sure you want to hear that."

This piqued his interest. He sat straight up now, staring straight at me.

"Oh, I'm sure I do," he retorted.

I stared at his legs. My hand was literally inches from his crotch. All it took was one swift movement and bam, I'd be living the dream. I kept glancing at the grass, and then back at his face, and then back at the grass, then his jeans, then the grass, then-

"Fuck!" I whisper-yelled, slapping my hands against my face and falling backwards onto the grass. "Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!"

Glenn seemed completely taken aback by my outburst. There was a brief moment when he didn't do anything, then I felt a warm hand on my knee. Don't think about it sliding upwards. Don't think about it sliding upwards.

"Hey," he said softly. "It's okay. I was only teasing you. We don't have to talk about your dick if you don't want to."

I laughed quietly behind my hands. I could feel him lie down beside me and his hand reached up to pry one of my hands off of my face. I peeked at him from the corner of my eye. He smiled at me, totally not upset with my strange behavior. I removed my other hand from my face.

"I owe you an apology," I said, staring up at the sky.

"What for?" he asked, uncertain of where this was going.

"For making you act so patient all the time. And being so weird about everything. There's a reason they nick-named me 'the unfuckable.'"

I winced at my own words. I'd forgotten that little tidbit. I'd forgotten a lot about everything before Glenn. He seemed to take up my entire world now.

Glenn let my words sink in before he spoke again. He sat up and I did too.

"I used to deliver pizzas," he offered.

I wasn't sure how to respond to this.

"I just thought I'd counter your bad thing with an equally bad thing," he admitted. "Did it work?"

"Hey man, I like pizza. Everyone's always happy when they see you come around. I don't think there's ever been one person who looked at their wife and said, 'Goddamn it, Martha, the fucking pizza guy is here.' Just doesn't happen."

That made Glenn laugh, and I couldn't resist joining in.

"Okay," he said. "My mom walked in on me, once."

I squinted at him.

"Walked in on you what?"

I could see him go a little red in the face.

"Having some – uh – me time."

It took me a second to think it over. And then my jaw dropped.

"No!" I said, not believing anyone could live after something that embarrassing.

"Yes," he admitted, grinning at my reaction, although clearly somewhat ashamed at the memory.

I laughed, and I laughed hard. Sure, my throat ached and I probably shouldn't have been making any noise at all, but it didn't matter.

"You're the best," I whispered through chuckles, allowing my fingers to caress the side of his face without even thinking about it. "Seriously."

He took my hand and, like a goofy yet romantic idiot, he kissed the back of it the way they do in the movies.

"I know," he said, grinning back at me.

I wanted to tell him how cute he was being, but my throat was really starting to protest. I touched it with my free hand. Then I realized this was the perfect opportunity.

I lunged forward and pulled Glenn into a kiss. I instantly thanked my five-seconds-younger self for doing it. Glenn responded immediately, kissing back with what I could only describe as what I assumed was passion. I could care less about pawing at his jeans now, I could barely even think beyond the feeling of his lips against mine.

And it felt perfect.

I swear it could have gone on for hours if we hadn't heard someone approaching us. We parted quickly, in case it was one of the kids.

"Food's ready," Amy called from a distance. I hadn't even noticed it was dinner time. "And get a room, you two."

I grinned to myself as she walked away. We were obvious. There was no doubt about it now. I turned to Glenn, fully prepared to try to mime my way into asking him if this could continue, but he seemed to get the gist just from my expression.

"Your tent or mine?"