Chapter 3: Presents

When my Mum died I didn't want to be around anyone… I sort of retreated and just watched people from a distance.

Standing outside Esca took a breath of fresh air. He felt his chest constricting from the run from Marcus's door to the front of the abandoned building. Esca hadn't gone in yet because he felt the familiar churning in his stomach. He'd eaten too fast, that combined with the fear and the running made him feel quite sick. Before he could stop himself he began to throw up.

Coughing and sputtering, Esca tried to catch his breath. He frowned pitifully, he had been so hungry and the meal had been so filling, he was sad to see it go. How pathetic, he couldn't help but feel totally sorry for losing his dinner.

He wished he could have understood Marcus, understood what he wanted, but the fact that he couldn't read Marcus scared him. Had Marcus wanted sex Esca would have been fine. He was used to that, hell, he might have even enjoyed sex with Marcus. The man was fucking beautiful.

But Marcus was a mystery. He seemed to want to take care of Esca and that did not sit well with him. Too many people had tried to take care of him. His father had thought he could, then he gave him over to the psychiatrist, but she was useless too. They all thought they knew what Esca needed, but they were all fucking clueless.

Why'd Marcus have to go and fuck it up? They could have had some great sex, maybe Esca would have gotten a tip and they'd be on their way. That was so easy. Marcus had to make it confusing. Had to muddle it all up.

Marcus couldn't sleep. He kept thinking about Esca in the cold evening. Maybe he was shivering. God, it was painful to think of, and Marcus couldn't help but feel like it was his fault. Like he had done something to cause Esca to freak out.

Of course he had, he'd tried to make Esca sleep in his bed and then turned him down when he offered sex. He couldn't go and have sex with a seventeen year old… but of course now that it was past midnight, Esca was officially of age, officially eighteen.

Marcus still didn't want to use him for sex. The thought of sex with Esca excited him, he could feel himself hardening as he remembered Esca's body, surprisingly muscular in that lean muscle way. He was so beautiful.

But the thoughts always became interrupted when he thought about how much help Esca needed. Not only was he obviously homeless and seemingly without a family, he had some other problems. Problems that Marcus could not even begin to know what to do about.

He wanted to help so badly, but if Esca wouldn't accept his help, there was nothing he could do. As if the train of thought flushed it out Marcus laughed as he realized what he could do. Sure this would make him a total asshole, but he knew it was going to work.

Esca wanted to find somebody else to watch. Another person to take his mind off of Marcus. Perhaps he'd go try and find the Brit. Maybe High Roller would take him back if he begged.

No matter what Esca thought or believed, his body knew the truth, it would not be that easy to get over Marcus. Instead he found himself in his usual perch in the abandoned floor waiting to see Marcus coming home.

Sure enough Marcus rounded the corner like usual. Except it was not like usual. Marcus was limping… limping badly. He grunt and yelped in pain collapsing on the sidewalk. No one around seemed to take any notice.

Esca felt his heart race with worry as he dropped the binoculars without a single thought and bounded out of the abandoned floor, leaving behind his backpack.

Esca took three stairs at a time making his way to the street. Once there he found Marcus bleary-eyed lying against a brick wall. "Marcus?"

"Esca?" Marcus replied weakly.

Esca wrapped an arm around Marcus's body and helped lift him off the ground. Marcus was extraordinarily heavy, but he and Esca together were able to walk him back to his apartment. Esca was silent as the made their way slowly up the stairs. He wanted to know what had happened, but didn't know how to ask.

At the door Marcus nodded to his pocket and Esca fished for his keys. Finding them he unlocked the door and helped Marcus in. Esca led him to the couch and eased him down.

"Are you okay?" Esca finally asked.

"Water," Marcus gasped.

Esca nodded and headed into the kitchen. He froze the minute he stepped into it. The wood table was draped with a plastic tablecloth with colorful balloons all over it. On the cloth was a small white birthday cake with red trimmed icing and two lone, unlit candles. Next to the cake were a small stack of red solo cups and a two-liter bottle of Coca-Cola, which in fact was Esca's favorite.

Esca turned back to look at Marcus, but he was no longer on the couch, he was smiling, standing right behind Esca.

"Happy birthday, Esca," Marcus smiled even wider.

"You tricked me," Esca replied with wonder.

Marcus turned red, frowning a bit, "I know. I'm sorry."

Esca could not figure out how he felt about that. It had been three years since he'd had a birthday cake. Hell he'd missed his last birthday simply because he didn't know the date. If it weren't for Marcus, the same thing would have probably happened again.

Esca was afraid to take a step forward, as if entering the kitchen any further would confine him to the space. The cake was so inviting. Since throwing up the night before he hadn't eaten and he'd quickly become hungry again.

"Don't make me celebrate alone," Marcus said easing past Esca and opening up the cola. He poured to cup of soda and held one out for Esca.

Esca took the cup, accepting that this was going to happen. Marcus's apartment, though sparsely decorated, was surprisingly warm and inviting. Esca had felt it the first time he'd been there. Now with the cake and soda it felt even happier. That scared Esca the most.

Marcus cut a piece of cake. "I didn't make it. I hope you like vanilla."

Esca nodded accepting the piece of cake Marcus had plopped onto the small red plate with similar looking balloons that were on the tablecloth. Marcus had really gone all out for this.

Esca took a bite of cake, reminding himself with each chew to eat slower so he wouldn't puke later. Of course having a meal consisting of cake and coke was probably not a great way to prevent that, but Marcus hadn't seemed to have thought that through. Marcus cut himself a piece and began to eat it, a smile breaking across his face the minute he began to savor the sweet treat.

"I fucking love cake," he said with his mouth full.

Esca laughed out loud. It'd been a while since he'd really laughed.

"You have a great laugh," Marcus said almost bashful.

Esca's face flared red and he trained his eyes back down to his cake halting his laughter. He felt a soft touch on his chin. Marcus used his fingers to sweetly guide Esca's gaze back up to meet with his. Marcus stared into his eyes, his hand still touching Esca's face.

Esca waited for what seemed to be an eternity. He was surprised he hadn't flinched away from Marcus's touch, but it was so gentle it didn't seem to frighten him. Plus the soft expression of Marcus's face was so kind Esca couldn't help but let down all of his defenses.

Marcus leaned down slowly. Esca felt his breath hitch as he awaited the kiss. None of the Johns ever kissed him. He wouldn't allow it, but none of them ever wanted to anyway. Because of the Esca had never had a right kiss. This was it. This was that moment. That first kiss.

Marcus placed his lips gently on Esca's forehead and gave a soft, chaste peck. "Happy birthday," he whispered hoarsely into Esca's skin.

Esca melt with both happiness and disappointment. So it wasn't his first kiss, it was just Marcus being sweet. Esca felt his shoulders slump and his posture fall a bit, but he couldn't help but feel a little happy and relieved. Relieved because he didn't have to kiss Marcus and therefor Marcus wouldn't notice how little Esca knows of kissing. Happy because it was just so wonderful being with Marcus and celebrating his birthday with someone he felt himself beginning to care about.

Marcus was glad the birthday trick worked. He'd felt like an ass when Esca had helped him back to his apartment. The kid had some surprising strength and did a good job of displacing a lot of Marcus's weight. Good to know for those times when Marcus really would need it. Hopefully Esca would be there for him.

After they had finished their cake the two sat down on the couch, both seemingly content in silence. It was surprising when Esca broke the silence, "How old are you?"

Marcus stared for a bit before answering. He was a little nervous that if Esca knew his age he'd get grossed out or think Marcus was a pervert.

"I'm twenty-nine," Marcus said truthfully.

"Okay," Esca said, his blank expression unreadable. They returned to the contented silence for a few more minutes.

"Esca," Marcus swallowed. "I'm going to offer again, please don't freak out."

Esca looked like he already was freaking out.

"You can stay the night," Marcus quickly added, "No strings attached!"

After a moment of consideration Esca nodded.

"You'll stay?"

Esca nodded again, his expression saying didn't I just say that?

"Great!" Marcus smiled wide.

The talk of sleeping over plus their full bellies seemed to make both of them pretty tired early. Marcus yawned loudly. Esca laughed but stopped when he remembered Marcus mentioning his laugh.

"Here," Marcus said guiding him out of the couch and into the bedroom. "Go to sleep. You'll be safe here," Marcus nodded to the bed before adding, "and more importantly warm."

Esca was grateful for Marcus's kindness. He stripped down to his boxers and climbed into the bed. Holy fucking crap the bed was comfortable. As far as beds went Marcus's was probably not very comfortable, but neither of Esca's regulars ever did anything with him in a bed. Esca could not honestly remember when he'd last been in one. It had been at least a year.

Before his two regulars, Esca had been around with a bunch of different men, some preferred to do the deed in the bed, but since then Esca hadn't even touched one.

Esca sighed content. However his calmness faded as he saw Marcus leaving the room. "Where you going?"

"You'll sleep here tonight," Marcus clarified. "I'll take the couch."

Esca cocked his head. The bed was plenty big enough for the two of them. "There's room," Esca said scooting his body closer to the edge in an attempt to convince Marcus.

"It's okay Esca, you take it. I'll be fine."

Esca frowned as Marcus carefully and quietly shut the door, shrouding the whole room in an almost complete darkness. The only light was the light of the city outside the window, still wide-awake.

Esca felt his eyelids getting heavy. The food, the fun, and now the comfort all worked together to wear down his defenses and soon Esca was in a deep, content sleep.

When he awoke in the morning, hushed voices in the living room caused all those defenses to raise again full force. Esca quickly dressed, prepared for the worst, whatever that was. He approached the door and opened it slowly and slightly.

"I can make you five thousand dollars," Harvey started. "Gotcha interested, huh?"

Marcus buried his face in his palms. He was too tired. Fighting was beginning to take its toll. Each fight was his last fight. He'd said it before and he'd say it again. Harvey knew that, but as Harvey does, he ignored it. Marcus was his best fighter, he made him a lot of money.

Marcus knew that Harvey's intentions were self-serving, but the money was really convincing. He really could use the cash. A tiny bit of movement behind Harvey's right side made Marcus look up. It was Esca standing silently in the doorway of the room, door cracked so he could spy on the proceedings in the living room.

Seeing Esca made him think of something. He hardly knew Esca, but something about that kid really clicked with him. He made him want to be a better person. He made him want to quit fighting even more. But that nagging in his head gnawed at his strength. Five thousand was a lot. If he had the money, maybe he could really take care of Esca. Maybe he could get Esca to give up having sex with strangers for money.

That is if Esca even wanted Marcus in the first place.

Esca just stared at the transaction, his gaze unreadable. Marcus shook Harvey's hand. "I'll do it."

"Great," Harvey smiled. "I'll text you later with the specifics. Just keep your night open."

Esca disappeared into the room when Harvey stood. Marcus ushered Harvey out and shut the door, sighing with defeat as he made his way to his room. He hoped Esca would stay. Maybe just for breakfast.

He knocked softly. It felt weird to knock on his own bedroom door. "Esca?"

No answer.

Marcus carefully eased the door open. Esca was just finishing making the bed. "You don't have to do that."

Esca just shrugged.

"God knows I never do," Marcus laughed.

Esca didn't respond he just patted the pillows and made his way out of the room.

At the door to the apartment Esca squirmed uncomfortably before saying, "Thanks."

"Stay for breakfast?" Marcus tried as Esca simply opened the door and left.

Esca used the park to think. It was sunny out. He was officially eighteen; he didn't really feel any different (except for a full stomach and being well rested). The sun warmed his skin and Esca felt surprisingly at ease and comfortable. Which in turn made him squirm and begin to feel less comfortable with each thought.

"Oh, it's you," a familiar voice said to Esca's left. He looked up and saw the Brit.

Esca just returned with a stare. "You got some time?" The Brit asked hopeful.

"Yeah," Esca shrugged standing and walking with the Brit to one of their usual motels. Pay-by-the-hour worked great for this sort of thing.

As the Brit hungrily began to strip Esca, Esca couldn't help but imagine Marcus. Imagine Marcus doing all these things to him. It was such a wonderful idea, but there was no way the Brit could fulfill this entire fantasy. All the Brit did was make Esca want Marcus even more.

After the Brit was spent and exhausted he laughed, "that was amazing!' He was always so complimentary. "How much do I own ya?"

Esca took his money and began to get dressed. Marcus could understand doing things for money. It was obvious from this morning that he'd been thinking twice about accepting tonight's fight, but Esca couldn't help but judge him when he did finally take it. It was at this point, half-naked in a pay-by-the-hour motel, that Esca realized he was no different.