This one is a lil bit longer. Guys, I'm not a writer, this class was an elective, THERE'S SO MUCH I CAN WRITE. Huge admiration for all the true writers out there. I know these one shots are a little ''wait what?'' not a lot of background information or details but like I said, I'm willing to go into full details if you'd like. This is just for fun, to pass time in this hot ass weather. Thank you for reading! Bucky loves you.
...
The clock stared back at him. It seemed to be mocking him as well, it kept ticking closer and closer to what he didn't want. It was a simple plan. He was meant to pack his shit and leave before Belle gets home. Bucky would not, or really, he didn't have the heart to stand there and watch her face after telling her the news. Not once in his miserable life had he had what she gave him. And that's why he needed to leave.
He fled the interview a minute before his named had been called. The nagging thoughts in his head kept coming back, each one of them making his head spin and heart beat faster. Bucky couldn't stand there and tell her that ''No, I didn't go'' or better yet ''I did go but I didn't stay, couldn't stay'', not after everything she had done for him. If it weren't for her, he wouldn't have gotten that opportunity in the first place, or having something to look forward to every day, a reason to wake up in the morning, a reason to push back his nightmares and let himself ...live.
It sounds like a lot. It sounds like too much pressure on one person, or something impossible for just one person to do, to have that effect on someone. But she did it. When you lived the life that he had, finding light at the end of tunnel was merely impossible to achieve. He was extremely lucky he found her, or rather, she found him and he was perplexed at this, usually luck wasn't on his side. He promised her he would try, Bucky wanted nothing more but to try for her. ''Don't do it for me, Bucky. Do it for yourself, you're more than just your nightmares'', she told him that but he refused to accept it. He was not worth anything, wasn't worthy of her.
He'd done it before, running away was like second nature to him. But now it was different because of her. Before, he had no attachments whatsoever, now he was in deep shit. They say that the strongest men have the most fragile hearts. Okay, that's not true, no one says that but that's how he felt. Bucky felt like he could conquer the fucking world on the outside, he was strong enough for it, or he thought, but inside he was a mess. A mess that fell deeply in love for the first time in forever. A man like him doesn't deserve love, his mind screamed at him. That's why, following what his mind was telling him, he sighed and looked away from the clock. It was time, he still got time before she got home. Bucky picked up his bag and with a heavy heart, walked out the door.