Chapter 11: Family Exercises

Early the next morning the three female members of the Kirigaya household were huddled together at the kitchen nook. Sachi rested her chin on the counter top next to a teacup that had been filled with black tea and was now mostly empty. Midori had just finished drinking her second cup of strong black coffee. Neither one had gotten enough sleep last night, but the three of them needed to meet and this was the only time they could do it together. Suguha was busy wolfing down the last of her bowl of cereal before getting ready to leave for school.

Sachi had already explained to them her diagnosis of Kazuto's condition.

Midori put down her coffee cup. "Are you sure? Kazuto seemed fine when I first saw him, chipper even."

Suguha pushed away her now empty cereal bowl and wiped her face clean with the back of her hand. "Mom is right. I talked to him privately, and I never saw him so relaxed and happy."

Indeed. She had not seen him so happy since they were young children, back when then they had played and frolicked together outside under the shining sun, laughing and yelling, rolling and wrestling in the grass, jumping and grabbing sticks to whack at each other with their pretend shinais.

When Kazuto was ten years old something had happened, and he became sullen and withdrawn from his sister. At first Suguha was worried that she had done or said something wrong so she tried to be extra nice to him. As a peace offering she bought him his favorite food, teriyaki chicken burgers. But her brother threw the plate of food in anger across the room, then he went up to his bedroom and closed the door behind him.

Suguha ran up to Kazuto's locked bedroom door and apologized over and over, begging him to please open the door, saying that she was very sorry for whatever she did, but he ignored her.

After that incident he had spent most of his time alone in his room. It was there that he had built his first personal computer using some spare parts that he had found in Midori's basement office: an old boxed motherboard with an outdated CPU, a leftover bare hard drive, and an unused empty ATX chassis. When Midori came home that night she was surprised to see him working so diligently on his new project. She decided to let him keep the spare parts and allowed him to continue with his project. She encouraged his new hobby, even tutoring him to learn some rudimentary computer programming. Using his newly built PC he had then quickly dived into the world of online gaming.

The years passed by. He remained civil with Suguha, but he always kept himself apart and stayed emotionally distant from her.

After S-F Day, Suguha had replayed over and over in her mind the wonderful bedside conversation that she had Kazuto on that day. When Kazuto first awoke he had been so caring, so gentle, so loving. She knew that whatever had happened during his two years in captivity inside of SAO had changed him, and very much for the better.

In Suguha's mind that bedside talk on S-F Day seemed magical. Night after night she had lain in bed with her eyes closed and imagined all the new and wonderful conversations that she would now soon share with him just like that one, and how they would become close again, very close, as she fell into a peaceful sleep.

Sachi sat at the breakfast nook thinking. Finally she said, "Yes, I understand your objections. He was indeed happy that day. I saw it too. However, I believe that..."

As Sachi continued to explain her theory about the cause of Kazuto's depression, Suguha gritted her teeth. She was already miffed how during the first couple days Sachi had monopolized all of Kazuto's waking hours, fluttering around, dancing attendance on him. Because of Sachi's constant ministrations Suguha had not had an opportunity to have another wonderful private conversation with her dear brother without that annoying girl always hovering within earshot.

One night Suguha had tried to sneak in to Kazuto's room to talk with him, but Sachi was a light sleeper and had caught her. After that Sachi kept Kazuto's bedroom door locked at night, explaining that he needed his sleep and must not be disturbed. The next day Sachi had taken Kazuto to see Asuna, and Kazuto completely crashed.

Suguha thought This is all her fault. If she is right about her theory then she should have known better.

It was because Sachi had just explained her theory that Kazuto was suffering from a potentially dangerous post-wakeup mental condition called 'VRDP syndrome'. The symptoms of VRDP syndrome included depression, withdrawal, paranoia, anti-social behavior, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), and strong agitation when exposed to certain emotional triggers. Until his condition improved he could have no visitors, both for their safety and his own. She said that the Ministry of Health had a well-established protocol for dealing with VRDP syndrome and that she was an expert at applying it. She explained that ultimately only time would tell if he would ever get better. She further explained to them that they needed to be prepared for the fact that VRDP syndrome had no cure, and that he would probably suffer from it to a greater or lesser degree for the rest of his natural life.

Suguha shook her head vigorously. "No! I don't believe you! My brother is not mentally ill! He was perfectly fine that first day!"

Midori chimed in, "Sugu is right, honey. He was fine when he woke up. I saw it too."

"Yes, but.."

"Aren't the worst symptoms always right when they wake up?"

"Well, yes.."

"And have you ever heard of an SAO victim die and wake up with no symptoms at all?"

"Well, no.."

"Well?"

Sachi sighed. "It had to be a delayed reaction. It's the only explanation."

"Delayed?"

"Yes. Don't you see? His death happened under extraordinary circumstances. He had just defeated Kayaba and cleared the game. He won! He must have been running on a huge endorphin high that masked or suppressed the VRDP symptoms. In the meantime he was still worried about his battle partner. When he found out what happened, that she was still stuck in the game and he couldn't protect her, his latent VRDP syndrome flared up and he completely crashed."

"I see."

"He has all the symptoms. It's a textbook case."

Suguha asked, "So you think that Asuna girl was only a trigger?"

"Yes, it's happening all over again, the same thing that happened with me. He failed to protect her so he crashed with guilt and remorse. He thinks he failed a second time, so he flips out and goes beserk and attacks Kayaba and he dies - somehow taking Kayaba with him and clearing the game. Then he wakes up unexpectedly. He thinks, 'Hey! I'm not dead! I cleared the game! That means Asuna woke up too! I didn't fail her!' Woo hoo!

"He wakes up from SAO and sees everybody running around celebrating his victory. But what is the very first thing on his mind? Is he celebrating too? No, he is not. The first thing on his mind is, 'I gotta find Asuna!' Naturally, he is worried about his team partner. When he finally does find her he is crushed a third time because he failed to keep his promise to her after all. He thinks, 'Not again! Not another girl I failed to protect! Not another girl who trusted me!'. And so it triggered him and he crashed, showing all the classic symptoms of VRDP syndrome."

Sachi sported a large bandage on her right cheek. Midori looked at Sachi's injured face thoughtfully. "Hmm."

Suguha wasn't buying it. "No, my brother is a not VRDP! He is not one of those nut cases!"

Sachi looked away in embarrassment. Midori's eyes frowned at her daughter. Suguha tried valiantly to correct her blunder: "Oh, sorry, Sachi. I just mean that Kazuto is not a VRDP, that's all, not like you. Uh, wait, that didn't come out right. What I meant is that he isn't one, and you're not like them either. Well, okay, maybe you're kinda OCD about offering to help everybody all the time but that's not a bad thing..."

Midori put her hand on Suguha's shoulder to stop her from talking. "Sachi, dear, I'm sorry, she didn't mean to say that. We know you are just fine." Midori then ordered her daughter to apologize, but Sachi waved it off as unnecessary.

Sachi made a weak smile. "It's quite all right; I'm used to it."

Midori then put the discussion back on track. "All Sugu meant to say is that she disagrees with your diagnosis. Honestly, I do too."

"But what else could it be?"

Midori leaned back in her chair. "Kazuto is such a sensitive boy. More than you might think. He has never relied on anyone but himself. It's just who he is. He always blamed himself if something went wrong. Sachi, you told me how much he cared for you and tried to protect you in the game. I believe that you are right, that he is blaming himself for his failure to protect this girl, and I agree with you in that I think he does need time to heal. I think the best way for you to help him do that is to just be there for him. Eventually he will open up to you. Then listen to him."

"Yes, I will."

"Thank you, dear."

Suguha turned to her mother. "Mom, but when can I..?"

Midori again put her hand on her daughter's shoulder. "Sachi knows how best to take care of him. She knows what happened better than anyone, so for now I think we ought to just let her handle it."

Suguha stood up and put on her knapsack. Facing away she said, "Yes, mother." She left before Midori could hug her goodbye.

Sachi stood up too, so Midori decided to give Sachi the hug instead.

"It will be all right, honey. I'm sure my boy will get better soon."

Sachi sighed as she watched Suguha close the front door behind herself without looking back.

She said quietly, "I think she blames me..."

Midori pushed back her hug in surprise "You do?"

"... and she might be right."

"Sachi, whatever do you mean?"

"I should never have taken Kirito to the hospital to see Asuna. I was a fool."

"Nonsense. You did exactly what he asked. You can't blame yourself for that or what happened afterward."

"No, I should have anticipated his reaction. Dang it." In frustration she slapped her own face. She winced forgetting about the cheek bandage.

Midori made a smile and re-embraced her. "Just look at you, blaming yourself for not protecting him. Honestly, I think you two are so alike sometimes."

Now it was Sachi's turn to push back the hug. "You think so?"

"Yes, I do. That's why I know that if anyone can heal him, I know it will be you." Midori used her thumb to gently wipe away the tear that was starting to form on her step-daughter's right eye.

Sachi laid her head on Midori's shoulder. "If I can, I will. I promise."

"I know you will."

The days passed. Sachi consulted her long term plan, which had allotted up to 14 days for Kazuto's initial mental VRDP rehabilitation.

On the seventh day she brought in his breakfast tray like she always did, but this time after opening the bedroom blinds to the morning sun she sat on the edge of his bed.

She waited.

He was still huddled under the bed covers with his face facing the wall, pretending to be asleep.

I think he is ready now.

While sitting on his bed she said quietly, "What happened to Asuna wasn't your fault."

As expected there was no response.

She had rehearsed her speech several times. She took a breath and tried not to sound nervous.

"It wasn't your fault when it happened to me either."

Another measured breath.

"Don't you see? The fault was mine, not yours."

Breathe normally.. out.. in..

"Kirito, you did not hurt me. I was the one who hurt you."

That got his attention.

He turned in bed to face her. "That's ridiculous."

Good, it's working.

She looked him in the eyes. "You saw the Data LED blinking on her NerveGear helmet, yes?"

"So?"

"And you know what that means, right?"

He slowly nodded. "Mental activity."

"Exactly. So you know she's awake in the game, right?"

"Uh, I guess, yeah."

"Correct. She's awake, right now, feeling, wondering, thinking."

Kazuto's eyes widened in realization. "She's awake.."

"Yes. So how do you think she is feeling right at this moment?"

"Uh.."

"Happy? Sad? What?"

"Hmm.. scared probably."

Good. Keep going.

"And?"

".. and wondering what happened."

"Very good."

"But Sachi, how can anyone possibly know what is going on in there? It's just a blinking LED. That's it. There is no way to monitor what is happening inside her mind, you know that."

"Actually, you are wrong."

"Okay, then tell me, what is Asuna thinking right now?"

Sachi leaned in conspiratorially and whispered in his ear, "Would you like to know?"

Kazuto sat up straight and grabbed her shoulders. "Yes! Tell me!"

Okay, here we go...

"Well I'll tell you. She knows what happened on Floor 75, and so do you. You were there fighting alongside her, remember? She got herself killed while you were both fighting Kayaba. But she knows that she actually didn't die after that battle, so she knows that you didn't die either. Now she is wondering where you are. She is asking herself, 'Where is Kirito?"

"Where am I? But where is she?"

"Exactly! She is searching all over the game to try to find you. And at the same time, she knows that you are beating up yourself for what happened, blaming it all on yourself."

"She does..?"

"Yes! Don't you see? That's the last thing she wants!"

"But how do you know..?"

Sachi jumped up and pointed a finger at him accusingly.

"Because, you dummy, that was the last thing *I* wanted!"

She got herself worked up. "Kirito, I was worried sick about you for 17 months! I know exactly how she feels. She is running around right now looking for you in the game, trying to find you, fretting about you, worrying about you, just as much as you are fretting about her!"

He put his head in his hands at the realization. "My god, I think you might be right."

"Of course I'm right! Right now the best neurological experts in Japan are at Tokorozawa Hospital working day and night to try to revive her, and just look at you, all gaunt and looking like a living cadaver. When she wakes up how do you think she is going to react when she sees your pathetic frail body?"

She knelt down on the floor at his bedside and held his hand. "So please, don't keep doing this to yourself. Stop punishing yourself. Stop hurting yourself."

"No... no..."

"Don't you see? All you are doing is hurting her too."

"No... I didn't realize.."

"So get up, mister. Get out of bed. Not for yourself. Do it for her."

"Yes, yes.. Sachi you are right." He put his hands on her kneeling shoulders. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize.."

She looked up again at him, this time with smiling tears. She said shyly, "And maybe do it for me?"

He smiled back at her. "Okay."

She looked down demurely. "Thank you."

With her head bowed down before him he gently stroked the hair on the top of her head.

"You know, you've been way too good to me, way more than I deserve."

She kept her head down. "I just do what I can."

He put his hand under her chin and raised up her head. As he did he saw her bandaged cheek.

"My god, how do you put up with me? You must hate me."

She put her hand around his. "I could never hate you."

He patted the bed next to him. "Sit here with me." She did as instructed. She was feeling more than a little nervous now that her objective was completed.

"You comfortable?"

"Uh, yeah.."

"I owe you so much. If it wasn't for you I probably would never have gotten out of this bed."

He then surprised her with a big hug. "Sachi, thank you."

She was stunned as he held her, her eyes open wide.

He kept saying, "Thank you.. Thank you so much.."

And he kept repeating those words she began to relax. It felt so natural, so right. She could feel a warmth spread within her. She remembered Midori's words.

If anyone can heal him, I know it will be you.

He kept holding her in his thankful embrace. After several moments she decided that it was enough and she gently pushed him away, then she laid him back on his bed.

She had a gleam in her eye. "Better get your rest while you can."

He noticed her coquettish smile. "Hmm?"

With exaggerated motions she primly moved the meal tray back next to his bedside. She then she leaned over him and said coyly, "Eat well, you're going to need it."

Before he could say anything in response, she turned and skipped gaily out of the room while humming a pleasant tune.

Okay, what is that crazy girl up to now?

Early the next morning Kazuto was awakened by the loud 'beep beep' sound of a truck backing up. He rubbed his eyes and opened the blinds. Outside he saw Sachi in work pants and a gray hoodie waving her hands behind a big delivery truck as it was backing up the wide driveway towards the dojo. On the side of the truck was stenciled Hashimoto Gym Rentals. He then saw a second delivery truck parked on the far side of the driveway apron and several men carrying large boxes into the old building.

Hoo boy. It looks like somebody got a hold of Mom's credit card...

He used the bedpan and then he ate the breakfast that was waiting on the bedside tray. He munched on a piece of toast as he sat back and he watched the commotion continue outside.

He made sure to eat everything on his meal tray that day. It because he knew that tomorrow would be his first day of intense PT workouts under Drill Sergeant McSachi.

Asuna, I am going to let that girl whip my body into shape. I'll work as hard as I can and I won't complain about it. That way when you wake up I won't scare you when you see what I really look like.

So please stop worrying about me. I know that Sachi will beat the [bleep] out of me, but I'll be just fine.

I'm doing it all for you.

I know you are alive and looking for me.

We will find each other.

I promise.

That same morning Nurse Kurosawa was in her temporary office talking on the phone with an official at the Ministry of Health. She heard a brief knock on her open door and held up her hand. A moment later she said goodbye and hung up the phone and looked up. In the hallway she saw an orderly waiting to enter.

"Come in."

As he entered she noticed the ID badge that was hanging from a lanyard around his neck. It had a red border indicating that he was part of the permanent staff.

The large man said, "Ma'am, here is the information you asked for." He handed her a data tablet.

"Oh, thank you." Kurosawa accepted the tablet and put on her reading glasses. She inspected the text on the tablet, scrolling it down with flicks of her finger. It was the list of names of the permanent staff that she had requested the previous day.

"Hmm, this list too short."

The orderly said, "Is it, now?"

She scrolled the list up and down re-checked it. "Yes, it is."

The large man shrugged, "Hey, it is what it is."

She thought his attitude was rude and on the edge of being insubordinate, so she gave him a sharp look. She then decided against admonishing him and only dismissed him, asking him to close the door behind him.

She again looked him over as he turned to leave. He was rather rough looking even for an orderly, unshaven, with muscular arms.

When he had stretched his arm out to hand her the tablet she had briefly spotted a tattoo hidden under his tunic sleeve. She only got a glimpse of it. It seemed to be shaped like an elongated box. It was wider at one end, with a pair of red smiling lips superimposed on top of it.

After the orderly had left she checked the tablet for the name that she saw on his ID badge. As she guessed it was not there.

Her frown deepened as she looked at the closed door.

The next morning Kazuto was rousted by a kick on his bed frame. "Get up, sleepy head. Up, up, up!" Then he heard a loud noise by his ear, phweeee.

He sat up groggily and covered his ear. "Ow."

He frowned as he looked at Sachi. She was wearing white socks, blue gym shorts, and a grey tank top. The whistle that dropped from her lips was tied to a white cord around her neck.

She tossed a set of underwear, shorts, t-shirt, and socks on his bed. "Put these on, then come outside!"

He was grumpy. "You know very well that I can't walk.."

Sachi then pulled out a pair of long steel arm canes that she had previously hidden under his bed and tossed them on top of the pile of clothes.

"After you get dressed, you can put these on to walk around. From now on you get no wheelchair time at home or in the dojo. I will wait out in the hall for you to get dressed. You have exactly three minutes, then I'm coming back in to drag you out ready or not. So get moving!" She marched out.

He sighed as he looked at the steel arm canes.

Asuna, I think I'm in hell..

Later that afternoon Suguha came home and immediately ran up to Kazuto's bedroom to see him.

Sachi was expecting her and blocked her path. "Sorry, Kirito is exhausted and crashed out. You can see him tomorrow."

She saw that Sachi looked rather sweaty and tired.

Suguha folded her arms and said dryly, "I hope you didn't kill him."

Sachi made a tired grin. "Not yet. Give me time."

Suguha made her own grin. "Can I help?" There was no school tomorrow.

"Sure."

The next morning.

"Up, maggot, up!"

Kazuto wearily rousted himself.

Oh come on, I'm a 'maggot' now? This is going too far.

He rubbed his tired eyes. As his eyes cleared he saw a girl standing next to him. She was wearing white gym shorts, a blue tank top, and a ball cap.

His eyes widened in recognition.

It was Suguha.

Then he noticed Sachi standing next to her.

Wait, both of them?

The two girls were grinning, with Suguha looking particularly eager.

Kazuto then spotted that Suguha was holding her shinai.

Oh crap. Double crap.

November 18, 2024. Dojo.

Kazuto was relieved that Suguha was busy at school that day. Sachi escorted Kazuto to the parallel bars, which were set at roughly the level of his armpits. "I'm going to lift you up. Ready?"

Kazuto nodded. "Yeah. This time I'm going to walk the full length and back again."

Sachi was dubious. "I don't know if you're ready for that.."

"I want to try it."

"Well, okay, as long as I spot. Warn me if your arms get tired."

"Got it."

Kazuto took off his steel arm canes and handed them to her, keeping himself upright with his good left leg while leaning back against her on his right. She dropped the canes on the mat, then gripped his forearms from behind.

She said, "You ready?"

"Go."

"1..2..3.. Up!"

Sachi grunted and pulled him up, with Kazuto pushing up with his good left leg. He grasped both bars, arms straight, with his feet about a half meter off the ground. He then concentrated and began arm-walking. He released his left hand, then his right.

Left, right, left, right. He reached the end of the parallel bars.

"Kirito, that's great! Now turn. Don't worry, I got you if you slip."

"I won't."

"Just go."

Kazuto pushed hard with his right hand and turned to grab the left bar. Then he did it again with his other arm. He was now facing the opposite direction.

Left, right, left, right. He was about two hand grips from the starting point when his arms started to give out. Sachi managed to grab his forearms just before he dropped, preventing a nasty fall.

"Whoa, careful, Kirito. I told you to warn me. I almost missed you."

"Sorry. I thought I could make it."

"Hey, you almost made it. I bet tomorrow you will go all the way."

He smiled at her. "Yeah."

Sachi tried to be as encouraging with Kazuto as she could. He was happy that she had permanently dropped her fake drill sergeant act on the previous Sunday. It was because Suguha had taken the act too far.

"Now lie flat on the mat, legs extended. I want to check your leg strength."

"Okay." He laid himself prone on the mat with his face looking up at the ceiling rafters.

Sachi kneeled and placed her hands over his right thigh, leaning in to hold it down using the weight of her body.

"Now lift as hard as you can."

"Unnghh..."

"Okay, that's good. Stop."

Kazuto relaxed.

"Yes, there is definite improvement in your leg strength."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I'm proud of you."

She stood up. "You ready to take a break?"

He sat up. "Yeah, let's take 5."

Sachi walked to the bench to grab some bottled waters. She tossed one to Kazuto, who caught it and opened it.

He drank deeply as she sat down next to him on the mat. Sachi splashed some of the water on her face to cool down.

He is really progressing well. He'll be out of those steel arm canes fairly soon.

After five minutes she pulled him up and handed him the arm canes. "You think you can walk another six laps today?"

"Yeah. Let's go for ten laps this time."

"Okay, if you think you are up to it. Just tell me before you collapse again."

"I will."

"Up." She lifted him up and handed him his arm canes, which he quickly put on. She lightly held his right arm as together they hobbled past the leg press, cardio machine, rings, and the free weights, to the start of the indoor running circle that started at the entrance of the dojo and went around the inner perimeter of the building.

She tied her own left leg to his right like they were competing in a three-legged race. "Remember, we're for going for distance, not time. Just let me know if your leg is going to give out before we tip over."

"Got it."

"Ready?"

He dropped the arm canes.

"Let's go."

Together they hobbled around the dojo. They moved together in sync at a walking speed. Sachi carefully judged how much support to give his right leg with her left leg at each step. After eight laps his right leg suddenly buckled.

It had happened enough times that she was more-or-less ready for it. As he fell towards her she rolled to take the fall so that she was underneath him for his protection. Even though she was mostly ready for his fall she still managed to bang her elbow on the hardwood floor.

"Ow, dang it. Kirito, I told you to warn me!"

He rolled off and sat up. "Sorry."

She untied the cloth strips. As she did so she grumbled, "If I didn't know you so well, I'd think you were doing this just to get physical with a girl.."

He blushed slightly. "I said I'm sorry. Look, I'll try to give you some more warning next time."

"You better. This is becoming a bad habit."

She moved him to the mat, then jumped up and wiped the sweat off her forehead. As trotted away to fetch the arm canes and water bottles he watched her from behind.

When she trotted back she noticed that he was still looking at her. She grinned, "Hey, you managed to get a girl all sweaty again. Congrats."

"Very funny."

She sat next to him on the mat and handed him a water bottle. She looked at the clock. "It's getting late, let's call it a day."

He flopped back on the mat. "Let's. I'm wiped out."

"I'm beat too. You did really well."

She flopped on the mat next to him. There they rested in silence, looking up at the ceiling of the dojo, laying side-by-side, just like they did the day before.

And the day before that.

Sachi closed her eyes.

The plan is working.

If anything it is running ahead of schedule.

First step: Mental rehab.

Second step: Physical rehab.

Third step: ...

"Hey, Sachi?"

Sachi broke out of her silent reverie. "Yeah?"

She saw that his head was turned towards her. "Uh, can I ask you something?"

She sat up. "Like what?"

He sat up too. "Well, uh.."

"Go on."

"It's just that you've been doing so much for me, waiting on me hand-and-foot, feeding me, putting me to bed, cleaning my bedpans, doing all this PT rehab..."

She shook her head. "No, no. We've talked about this. I don't want anything in return."

"But.."

"No, and it's not just because I don't want anything, it's also because we.."

He finished her sentence. ".. are family now, yeah."

She smiled. "Yeah."

"Well, okay, right. So, if we are family now, can I ask you a question?"

"Like what?"

"Uhm, well, family shares things... personal things."

"Yeah, they do."

"You never talk about yourself. I heard some things from Mom and Sugu..."

She looked down. "Oh. I see."

"Look, if it's private you don't have to say anything."

"No, I understand. I'll answer any question you want."

"Oh? You will? Good, I'm glad. Okay, the thing is, well, I thought that, since we are now sweat-buddies and all..." He laughed. "What I really mean is that since we are family now, maybe you and I can, uh, you know.."

"You want me to open up with you a bit?"

He was clearly embarrassed. "Uh, yeah. Is that okay, Sachi?"

"It's perfectly fine. In fact, I've been waiting for you to ask me."

"Oh? You were? Waiting for me..?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"Because I didn't want to burden you with my own problems. You were still busy dealing with your own personal issues. My plan was to get you mentally and physically back in shape first."

"Oh. Uh, I guess that makes sense. Sugu did tell me you had some kind of plan for me."

Yes, I do have a plan for you.

"Sachi, tell me about yourself."

"So, what do you want to know?"

"Tell me everything."

Third step: Sharing.

Sachi laid back down on the mat and crossed her legs while looking up at the ceiling.

"You ready? This might take a while."

He laughed, "We only have the rest of our lives."

She laughed too. Yes, we do.

She put her hands behind her head. "Well, as you know, my father abandoned my mother before I could remember. She became an alcoholic. When I was six she started to receive a monthly bank annuity, an inheritance that she got from a distant uncle. Her alcoholism got really bad after that. She quit work, then she sent me out on errands to buy groceries and stuff. She only went out herself when she had to, mostly to buy booze."

"So you were neglected as a child?"

"Honestly, I never felt like I was. And she never hit me, or abused me, or anything like that. She just basically left me alone while she was passed out in bed all day. I went to school on my own. The years passed, and then..."

An hour later Suguha poked her head in. "Hey you idiots, it's dinner time!"

They both sat up. Kazuto yelled, "We'll be right there!"

"Hurry up!" Suguha went back to the house.

Sachi smelled under her armpit. "Ugh, I stink." She pulled Kazuto up. She held her nose. "Ugh, you stink even worse."

He ignored her jibe and simply hugged her.

"Kirito..?"

"Sachi, I'm so sorry. I knew you had lived a hard life, but, wow, I didn't realize..."

"It's okay, really."

"No it isn't. I took you for granted."

"Nope. I focused on your recovery, that's all."

She gently stroked his back. "Do you know what you can do to make me happy? This. This makes me happy. Just being with you, helping you, it's all I want."

"Sachi.."

"It's fine. Like I said, I was going to tell you my life story when you I thought you were ready for it. Then I would wait until you asked me. Now you did."

He let go of his embrace. "I'm still so sorry.."

She smiled. "Hey, it's all in the past. Let's focus on the here and now. Okay?"

I'm such an idiot. I should have asked her sooner. I had no idea her life was so miserable. No wonder she dived into SAO.

How do I make it up to her?

Then she grinned, "Race!"

"What?"

"First one to the house gets the bath before dinner!" She ran off to the house.

"Hey, no fair!" He hobbled after her.

That night he wasn't able to sleep. He stared up at the ceiling.

I need to tell her.

On his own he had gone on the Internet and researched VRDPs: Mentally unstable, unpredictable, obsessive, sometimes with surprisingly strong or violent reactions to stress or negative stimuli.

Is that true? I know the Internet isn't always accurate.

For now let's assume it is true. Question: Is she obsessive? Yes, she is definitely obsessive about taking care of me. Assume that's a symptom. Sugu told me about her Cinderella act. That fits the profile too.

And she always calls me 'Kirito' no matter how many times I ask her to stop. That's definitely not normal.

Yes, she definitely has some issues.

The question is, is she doing all this purely out of a sense of duty to me? A sense of loyalty, to repay her perceived debt, all because she thinks she hurt me with that Christmas letter? If so I need to be really careful.

I bet she would do anything I ask.

Anything at all.

Even...

Ugh! No! Bad Kazuto!

So what are her own feelings? Her own secret wants?

I have to know before I can safely tell her about Asuna.

If Sachi is just being subservient to me only out of her sense of loyalty, duty, obligation, or whatever, and if it is nothing more than that, then she ought to be happy for me when I reveal my secret about Asuna.

She just wants me to be happy, yes? Finding Asuna would make me really happy, so she would naturally want that too, right? She might even feel relieved.

But what if she has her own private or secret feelings for me, wanting me, wanting me for herself?

She told me her life story and I still don't know her true feelings.

Does she even know herself?

And if she does harbor private feelings for me, how will she react when she finds out about Asuna?

It could be really bad.

I need to know!

Maybe I should test her?

But how?

It has to appear perfectly innocent.

Let me think..

Hmm, yeah. Let's try that.

November 19, 2024. Dojo.

Sachi wiped her brow. "Kirito, ready to walk six laps?"

"Yeah. Same as yesterday, we go for ten."

Sachi sighed, "Fine. But tell me before you crash this time."

"Right."

She tied his right leg to her left like they were in a three-legged race.

"Let's go."

Together they hobbled around the dojo. They moved together in sync at a walking speed. Sachi carefully judged how much support to give his right leg with her left leg at each step. Just after completing seven laps his right leg suddenly buckled.

As he fell towards her she rolled to take the fall so that she was underneath him for his protection. She managed to avoid banging her elbow on the hardwood floor.

But this time he didn't immediately roll off of her.

He panted, "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"I'm glad."

Their bodies were still pressed together.

She waited.

Then she closed her eyes.

Kazuto rolled off her. "Sorry. Ouch, I think I bumped my head."

She jumped up. "You did!? Let me check."

She carefully inspected his head for bumps or contusions. "You look okay."

He rubbed the back of his head. "Yeah, I'm fine. Sorry."

She pulled him up. "Let's take a break. I'll get your canes and the waters."

He watched her as she trotted away.

She closed her eyes.

She was waiting for me.

But why?

Did she think I was testing her, that I was checking to see if she was willing to cross the line?

Well, I was.

If she had opened her lips, even slightly, I would know that she had her own private feelings for me.

But she didn't. She was just waiting.

Did she catch me testing her?

I think she did.

Dang it. I didn't learn anything.

He continued to watch her as she tossed him the water bottle.

At the end of the training session they both laid on the mats side by side, exhausted, just like they did every day.

They both looked up at the ceiling.

Finally it was Sachi who turned her head and spoke.

"Kirito? Can I ask you a question?" She sat up.

Ugh, she caught me. She knows.

She's gonna ask why I was testing her.

Crap, I'm going to have to explain about Asuna. I'm not ready!

He sat up and was very nervous. "Uh, yeah, sure, ask away. Anything."

"Kirito, how come your friends only visit when I'm working at the hospital?"

Since S-F Day, Klein, Agil, and his other SAO friends had always visited Kazuto in the evening. The reason was that Kazuto had arranged to make sure the visits were always when Sachi was not around.

He thought quickly. "Well, you see, most of them either go to school or work during the day so the only time they can all visit me is during your evening shifts at the hospital."

"I see. I guess that makes sense. I was just wondering because I never get to see your friends."

"Sorry about that. I didn't know you wanted to meet them. They all gather regularly at the Dicey Cafe. Maybe when I'm finally rehabilitated we can go down there together and I can introduce you to the gang. I'm sure Sugu would like to come too."

"Yes, I would like that."

"Let's plan on it then."

Good, that bought me some more time.

Friday, November 22, 2024

Lt Colonel Seijirou Kikuoka was walking quickly down the hallway of MINFO headquarters wearing his JSDF military uniform. An assistant ran up to him and handed him a manila briefing folder as he entered his private office. He quickly sat down and read the new report.

After pouring through thousands of hours of video surveillance recordings from every airport and every seaport in Japan, Kayaba had finally been spotted leaving from Narita Airport on a Garuda Indonesian flight with a female companion. She was identified as one of his former graduate students. Kikuoka looked at the enhanced video surveillance photo, which showed Kayaba wearing a heavy coat, a wide brimmed Panama hat, and a false beard. The pair were spotted because his companion was not disguised.

The pair were seen disembarking from the flight at the Soekarno-Hatta International Airport in Jakarta. They then took a local flight to Balikpapan in Borneo.

There the trail ended. Beyond Balikpapan was a thousand square miles of nearly uninhabited rural semi-jungle with few roads, fewer amenities, and no data connections whatsoever.

All signs pointed the same way: Kayaba was going off the grid. He had taken out of SAO whatever it was that he wanted, and was going to play with his new toy by himself in the middle of nowhere. Allowing himself to be tracked to Borneo was his way of saying that he wasn't going to be a threat to anyone and that he was done with the outside world.

But Kikuoka was not done with him. Inspector Javert grit his teeth and his face darkened.

He picked up his phone.

"Get me a plane ticket to Indonesia."

Sunday, November 24, 2024

Suguha wearily climbed down the steps and stumbled into the kitchen half awake. She was still wearing her pajamas. Sachi had already left to go buy groceries. Kazuto was still crashed upstairs in bed recovering from the previous day's PT workout.

Midori was sitting in the breakfast nook enjoying a coffee while watching a video on her tablet. Suguha tried to ignore the audio as she searched the refrigerator to try to find the leftover KFC from yesterday's dinner.

A man was speaking. "The Hubble Ultra Deep Field** image is incredibly important. When NASA aimed the world's most powerful telescope at an empty patch of sky the size of a grain of sand at arm's length, a patch that seemed utterly empty and devoid of any stars or galaxies or anything else, it captured an image of over 10,000 galaxies, each with hundreds of billions of stars. That image should be physically impossible."

A woman, possibly the interviewer, asked, "How do you mean 'impossible'?"

Suguha poked her head deep inside the refrigerator.

Where is that leftover KFC?

"Well, you have to understand the mathematics of it. It has to do with something called the alpha opacity function, a concept familiar to video game designers. In a 3-D video game, every object or texel is assigned an RGBA value: red, green, blue, alpha. The alpha value determines the the opacity of that the object or texel at that point. This determines its transparency: 0.0 is fully transparent, and 1.0 is fully opaque, typically scaled on integral values from 0 to 255. Video games are of course discrete, not continuous, simulations and therefore the RGBA values either quickly saturate - go to 1.0 - or remain at 0.0, nothing in-between.

"You see, achieving partial transparency that doesn't enfog the player is incredibly hard, and many video game designers simply cheat and create a fake fog that kicks in at a fixed distance. Creating a 3-D simulation over unimaginable distances while still revealing interesting objects at those distances is practically impossible."

"So you're saying it is probably not random."

Ah, there is the chicken bucket.

"The opacity gradient has to be inconceivably precise to be able to see such interesting details on literally the far side of the universe. For it to be merely random would be like hitting the Power Ball Jackpot. And you can't hand-wave it away with the Anthropic Principle either."

"So, in your opinion, the fact that we can see all those lovely swirling galaxies is not a coincidence?"

"No, it is not. And they shouldn't be 'swirling' either."

Hey, who ate all the drumsticks?

"How do you mean?"

"The pinwheel structure of a galaxy is mathematically impossible. Spiral galaxies simply shouldn't exist. Computational physicists have tried for decades to create computer simulations that would create a long-term pinwheel structure of a typical spiral galaxy and it just doesn't work, at least not without cheating. It always smears into a blob."

Suguha rolled her eyes while trying to ignore the audio.

Everyone in this house is a geek. Mom, Kazuto, Sachi. Why am I the only normal one?

"Then dark matter (DM) was discovered. Why does dark matter exist? There's no reason for it. It definitely exists - gravitational lensing reveals it everywhere in the cosmos - but there's nothing in the Standard Model that explains it. It's just there. But why? It's only use seems to be for creating interesting and wonderful structures like beautiful pinwheel galaxies that we can actually see at cosmological distances."

"But why is it like that?"

Suguha sat on a chair at the breakfast nook and ate a cold chicken breast with her fingers.

The man's voice was getting excited. "Exactly! Don't you see what this means? The Hubble Ultra Deep Field is the 'smoking gun', so to speak. The fact that miraculous photo exists, that the Universe seems to be carefully crafted so that we as humans can actually see all these amazing, beautiful, and glorious galaxies by the billions, strongly implies that someone or something..."

Suguha rolled her eyes.

You want to see a miracle?

Suguha picked up another piece of cold chicken as she tried to tune out the annoying video, which Midori continued to watch with keen interest.

".. and then there is dark energy (DE). Now that is really exciting too. I think the reason it exists is because it creates conditions for..."

The miracle is how my geek mother ever managed to marry a normal guy and make babies.

Suguha dug into the chicken wing.

Sunday, December 1, 2024

Sachi was sitting on a bench in the dojo watching Kazuto practice kendo with Suguha.

Kazuto was standing at attention holding a wooden bamboo shinai.

He was now able to walk unassisted, although he was still not yet able to go long distances. Sachi had suggested the idea that they practice kendo together, saying that Kazuto was now ready for more advanced physical training. Both siblings agreed it was a great idea and Suguha ran to get her gear. Suguha had finished in the top ten at the last national competition for middle schoolers. It was her passion and she loved it.

Suguha stood facing him. Both were wearing a face mask with a keikogi shirt over a hakama skirt. Sachi stood and moved between the combatants. They bowed formally at each other.

Sachi yelled, "Hai!" and quickly stepped away.

She saw Kazuto immediately assume the stance that she had seen him use so many times in their shared battles in SAO: He moved his left foot forward, right back, and he held his shinai low with his right hand with his left capped against the hilt.

Suguha stopped and stared at him. "Kazuto, what the heck are you doing?"

"Hey, this is my own personal style."

Suguha shook her head in disbelief. In keeping his shinai low like that he had left his head wide open and unprotected. She was about ready to charge with a one-shot killing blow, but something about his demeanor stopped her. He seemed to be supremely confident and relaxed despite the weird pose, as if he had been doing it for years.

She was still wondering about it when Kazuto suddenly charged, sliding low and bringing his weapon up. He wasn't particularly fast but the motion had surprised her. She dodged and returned the attack but missed him. He was surprisingly limber with his unorthodox moves.

Kazuto swung behind her and attacked again, but missed as Suguha rotated away. It was close. The only thing that saved Suguha from Kazuto's sneak attack was her reflexes and her instincts.

She was now angry, and she decided not to hold back and she charged at him. Kazuto tried to do a sharp turn to avoid her attack, but his bad leg threw him off balance. She took advantage of it, using her shinai to whack him with full force right on the top of his head.

Kazuto crumpled to the floor. Sachi jumped up and ran to him, yelling "Stop!"

Suguha gasped and knelt down to him. "Kazuto! Are you okay?"

He sat up seeing stars. Sachi pulled off his mask and checked his head for signs on injury.

"That smarts." He looked at Sugu. "Wow, Heathcliff has nothing on you."

Sachi checked him. "You seem okay." She sounded contrite. "It was too soon to try this. I shouldn't have suggested it."

"Eh, it was fun."

"Kirito, you need at least a couple more weeks to build up your leg strength before you try that again."

Kazuto sighed, "Yeah, you're probably right." He pulled off the gear.

Suguha picked up his mask and offered it to Sachi. "You want to try it?"

Sachi shook her head. "No, I couldn't. Not after what happened.. you know." After dying in ALO she had told Suguha that she never wanted to hold a weapon ever again.

"C'mon. It's fun. It's not serious. It's just a bamboo stick."

"I'd rather not..."

Suguha decided to tease her. "Well, you are a smart girl. I mean, if you had actually fought me I'd kick your ass to Mars. I can understand why you're such a coward."

That got Sachi's hackles up. She stood up.

"Oh really now?"

Suguha shrugged nonchalantly, "Of course. What can I say? You would be pathetic. A total noob."

Sachi crossed her arms. "Want to make it interesting?"

"Hmm?"

"Help me practice, and train me after school until you think I'm ready, then..."

Kazuto ham-handedly tried to intervene. "Now, ladies, please."

Both girls whirled and yelled, "Shut up!"

Suguha turned back to face Sachi again. "And then?"

"We do a match. The loser cleans Yaya's litter box every day... until school ends in April."

"Oh, you are beyond evil."

Yow. They are taking it up to another level.

Both girls grinned evilly at each other. Kazuto watched in shocked disbelief at the mutual staring contest.

Suguha kept her stare. "Deal."

Sachi bent over and donned Kazuto's gear and picked up the pole.

Kazuto asked, "Uh, so what should I do in the meantime..?"

Sachi turned, "Go away. We're busy here."

"Yeah, get lost."

"Sheesh." He left.

The days passed. Sachi continued her evening rounds at the hospital, spending most of her time tending to the sleepers in the main wards.

She was unable to look in on Asuna very much. It was because she was not assigned to that floor. She had tried to submit a request to be reassigned to the 18th floor, but it was denied with no explanation.

One day she saw one of the permanent staff wheel an SAO patient out of the main wards. She was curious, so she followed him. She saw that he was headed toward one of the red restricted areas.

She walked alongside the orderly. "Where are you taking him?"

He frowned at her. "Research."

"Oh I see. What kind of research?"

"None of your business." He swiped his red keycard at the red hallway doors and pushed the medical bed inside. The red doors closed behind him.

Sachi shrugged off his rude behavior. As a VRDP she was used to it.

Friday, December 20, 2024. 7:05 a.m.

Suguha ran huffing and puffing back to the house. She had forgotten her homework assignment. She figured that if she ran fast enough that she might still be able to catch the 7:20 train at the Saitama Omiya station and still make it to school only about 15 minutes late.

Suguha zoomed upstairs and flung her bedroom door open. There she saw Sachi next to her futon on her knees looking at the floor. She had no time to ask Sachi what she was looking for and just yelled, "Homework! Homework!"

"Next to your computer."

Suguha grabbed her notebook and stuffed it into her backpack. "Why didn't you say anything? You could have at least texted me!"

"I was still sleeping and I didn't know you needed it."

"Gah!"

Sunday, December 22, 2024

The four members of the Kirigaya family were assembled in the dojo for the big match. Midori and Kazuto were standing on the sideline cheering along the combatants. By mutual agreement Midori was rooting for Suguha and Kazuto was rooting for Sachi.

Midori yelled, "Sugu, you can do it!"

Kazuto whooped, "Sachi, let her have it!"

The match had been going for several minutes. Kazuto marvelled at Sachi's speed and reflexes. Suguha was physically larger and stronger, and with her powerful legs she was faster than Sachi when charging in a straight line. Sachi did not have Suguha's raw speed, but with her smaller size she could zip and twist and fly around her opponent like a falcon, scoring hits from behind, flying away before Suguha could strike back.

Kazuto was amazed at Sachi's skill. Suguha was forced on the defensive, crouching, backing away, trying to find an opportunity to lunge with a decisive blow.

Sachi is amazing. I would love to see her fight Asuna in a VRMMO. The Falcon versus The Flash.

Suguha had changed tactics, going on the defensive, doing feints, causing Sachi to dodge and twist. They were both getting tired, but Suguha had more stamina.

Suguha exploited it. She forced Sachi to expend more energy, wearing herself out sooner.

Suguha's tactics were working. Sachi was slowing down. Eventually Suguha was able to score a killing blow to Sachi's neck. Sachi staggered and fell to her knees.

Suguha pulled off her mask. "I win."

The battle was over. Midori and Kazuto ran down to the fighting duo, with Midori hugging Suguha and Kazuto hugging Sachi.

Kazuto whispered in Sachi's ear. "You were awesome."

Sachi was exhausted and could barely stand. "Four months of litter duty.."

Kazuto offered, "Hey, I'll help you do it."

Sachi pushed him away and managed to stand straight despite her exhaustion, tall and proud.

"No. I am a warrior. It is my burden. I will bear it alone."

Kazuto grinned at Sachi. He had never seen this side of her before. He had no idea she loved being so competitive.

Even though the match was all in good fun, he thought that if Sachi ever fought a serious battle like that inside a VRMMO game - without SAO's levelling-up system which unfairly artificially boosted abilities and skills - that her unique fighting style would make her a formidable opponent.

The Falcon versus The Flash? I could never match Asuna's speed or her accuracy in battle. It would be a fast and exciting fight - offense versus offense - but Asuna has more raw power so she should win.

The Falcon versus The Black Swordsman? I'm pretty sure I could beat her. I would have to use Sugu's tactics though. It would be a slow, difficult, grinding battle, but ultimately I think I could wear her down.

But what if Sachi had more energy than me? More endurance?

Heh, I would be screwed.

The foursome returned to the house. Midori wrapped her arm around her step-son as they watched Suguha and Sachi walk ahead of them. The two girls were laughing, poking each other, shoving each other's shoulders, and generally acting like a pair of unruly five year olds.

Together, mother and step-son watched the two step-sisters tussle back and forth.

Midori spoke quietly.

"You know what?"

Kazuto turned his head.

"Know what, Mom?"

"We really are a family."

Kazuto smiled.

"Yeah."

A/N:

* See LN Vol 3.

** See The Hubble Ultra Deep Field in 3D by Deep Astronomy on YouTube.