Author's Note: I know, I know, it's been years! Like I'm shocked it took me so long to get back at this, but life got crazy, I didn't really feel inspired much and a whole list of other things.

However I'm slowly but surely getting back onto my writing feet and I feel I can finally finish this story.

Thank you to all who have reviewed this story and aajshn0813 for inspiring me to get back to it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Ghost by On An On. I just felt that it was Hwoarang's song for this chapter.

IIII

I don't want to be your stupid fling or your magazine
That you look and turn the pages
Of someone else that you'll never love

IIII

Initially Hwoarang didn't care much for Ling Xiaoyu.

She was annoying and way too preppy for his liking. Honestly how old was she again? And pigtails? At her age?

The fact that she was enamoured with his on again off again enemy didn't improve his impression of her much either.

No he didn't like her. Mind you, he didn't hate her either. Just didn't think much of her.

When they started hanging out in their group of mutual friends he was sure they were going to butt heads. Turns out without any clairvoyant abilities he was right. They did butt heads and often too. Over serious things. Little things. And sometimes just plain stupid things.

Seriously did this girl just not quit? Had no one ever taught her the beauty of being seen and not heard?

It was a good thing he was such a gentleman.

At times, much to his disdain, he even sympathised with Kazama.

Yet the more they fought over everything, the more he began to look forward to being around her. She was a bit silly, clearly naive but she was entertaining. He was never bored when he was around her.

So he began to tolerate her, heck even look forward to seeing her. But only a little, after all there was still so much he could take of her prattling on about how misunderstood Kazama was.

Kazama was full of shit. No misinterpretation there.

The change in their relationship ironically or maybe not came about because of his nemesis.

He'd lost a fight against him, but not by much. Back then they were still close enough in strength that he was pretty much confident in his victory. However to his shock, a simple miscalculation ended up being his undoing. He lost and Kazama advanced to the next round.

He was drowning his sorrows and being a general ass when she'd approached him. He'd been certain she was going to ridicule him or something just as petty. Instead she sat down with him and ordered whatever he was drinking.

Now he's no lightweight and he sure as hell didn't drink none of that weak sugary stuff.

So he waited, wondering how she'd take the drink.

Her reaction was just as he'd expected. She coughed, her eyes watering and her face pinched in a grimace. Good. That's what she got for being presumptuous.

However she surprised him even more when she asked for another. And another. The comedy unravelling before him had him both perturbed and amused.

By the end of it all she was too drunk to even stand let alone sit up straight.

Later, because he was too good for his own good, as he carried her to her room he admonished her for her stupidity. "That was stupid," he'd chided. "You should only drink as much as you can tolerate."

He was surprised when she spoke because he was sure she couldn't even hear him. "Don't be stupid," she'd said in a slurred speech. "I might have lost to that bottle of tequila today but you can bet your ass next time I'll be the victor."

He'd shaken his head muttering about her stupidity at picking a fight with a bottle of alcohol when her words had finally registered.

She could have tried to encourage him without resorting to such drastic measures but with the mood he'd been in he wouldn't have listened. But like this he understood.

For the third time that night she'd surprised him.

"You know you're smarter than you think," he'd remarked.

"Took you long enough," was the muttered retort.

They didn't become best friends overnight, but his opinion of her had changed.

He finally began to see why she got along with so many people. Why Kazama with all his shit couldn't stay away from her.

And over the years that respect morphed from adoration and into love.

He hadn't wanted to fall in love with Ling Xiaoyu. It was a pretty stupid thing to do. But he couldn't help himself.

His rivalry with Kazama had started out purely as an ego thing but because of Xiao it became so much more than that.

He didn't just want to defeat Kazama, he wanted to steal the most precious thing to him. And not out of spite but simply because she'd become the most precious thing to him too.

Yet because of their last fight. Because Kazama won over a small miscalculation from his part he'd foolishly thought he could defeat him if he was more careful, more focused.

After all, just because Xiao had yet to win against a bottle of tequila didn't mean he couldn't defeat Kazama.

But he'd been wrong and his calculation error had cost him more than a simple defeat.

He'd lost the very person he wanted to protect the most. Offered her back to the very man she'd tried so hard to forget.

Against such truths Hwoarang felt utterly powerless and useless.

"I should have died that day," he muttered bitterly.

"Don't you ever say that!"

The loud exclamation brought him out of his musings. He'd thought he was alone in the training room. Hadn't even heard Miharu enter.

Now she stood glaring angrily at him, but it was pointless. He knew he'd fucked up.

"Doesn't make it any less true," he said frankly.

But Miharu only glared at him. "Do you think Xiao would have been happy if you'd died?" she asked angrily. "Do you think she made that sacrifice so you could spout such nonsense?!"

A pained look flickered across his face. "She probably hates me," he said, voicing something he'd been so fearful to even consider let alone speak aloud.

The anger seemed to evaporate from Miharu's stance. "Don't be stupid, Xiao doesn't hate you," she said softly, gently. "That emotion is just something she could never harbour inside of her."

Hwoarang let the truth of those words sink in. After all, Xiao couldn't hate Jin even after everything that he'd done.

Sure she said she did, but he knew the truth. Her supposed hate was just a way to avoid dealing with her pain.

You don't love someone that long, that much and just stop because it's the smart thing to do.

Look at himself. He knew the score but he still loved her anyway.

"You know the crazy thing is she hasn't been even gone that long but it feels like I've already lived years without her," he admitted in a bitter tone.

"I miss her too," Miharu said with a sad look in her eyes.

Hwoarang hung his head, clenching his fists. He couldn't help wonder what he needed to do so that his love could finally reach her. Compared to her, saving the world didn't really mean much if she wasn't at his side.

He'd never claimed to be a hero. He wasn't like Lars or Steve or any of the other guys who were rallying to stop Kazama and bring him down.

He was just a guy in love with a girl who'd throw herself before the devil to save his life. When he thought like that he couldn't help hate himself just a little bit more and love her just that much more.

His chest ached and it had nothing to do with his still mending ribs and everything to do with the girl who'd carved her name on it.

I'll save you, Xiao!

/Flashback/

Her eyes shining, she stared at the glittering jewel in awe. "This is..." words failed her as she marvelled at the beauty of the precious stone. "It's too beautiful. I don't think I can even wear it."

"Fine than give it back," Jin quipped.

Xiaoyu's eyes narrowed as she glared at him in warning. "Mine, don't even think about it," she threatened.

A rare smile curved his lips upwards and even though he's elation didn't show, she knew he was just as a happy.

"I can't wait to show everyone," she continued with a dreamy look on her face. "Mi, is going to be so jealous!"

Lifting her hand to her chest, Xiaoyu closed her eyes savouring the moment.

"Are you praying?"

Xiaoyu's left eye opened. "And if I am?" she asked with a smirk.

He just shook his head, sprawled out on the bed.

"Should we throw a party?" she asked beside him.

A thoughtful look flickered over his face. "Maybe not yet," he suggested.

Xiaoyu frowned. "Why not?"

Turning onto his side, Jin propped his head on his hand. "I want it to be something special just between us for a while," he revealed.

"Sharing it and getting to rub it into everyone else's faces will still make it special," Xiaoyu insisted.

She didn't understand why he wanted them to keep it a secret. It's not like it would come as a shock to anyone.

"The truth is," Jin began dropping his eyes to the duvet beneath them. "I'm afraid that if it leaves this room it will be taken from us."

Now Xiaoyu was confused. "What do you mean taken from us?" she asked. "Taken by whom?"

He seemed to struggle with finding the right words, but she didn't push him. Time had taught her to give him a chance to voice his thoughts. He was such an enigma. In the past she'd feared that his inability to communicate with her would distance them.

"It's just every time I make something precious my own, I tend to lose it," he said softly. "Everything I care about eventually gets taken from me."

Understanding and a flood of emotions filled her.

Sometimes she forgot just how much pain Jin carried with him.

Xiaoyu pulled his head, pressing it against her breasts.

"Xiao?"

"Your fears are unfounded," She said. "I'm not going anywhere."

She felt him relax in her arms.

"I'm not certain about a lot of things, but I'm sure about my love for you," she continued.

In a deft move that made her breath catch, Jin pushed her beneath him, his hands either side of her face. The intensity in his eyes made her face flush and her heart race.

"I'm truly unworthy of you," he said in a husky whisper that had her skin tingling all over. He lowered his face to her neck, his lips pressing at the hollow of her neck making her gasp.

"Jin." His name was filled with longing and desperation.

When his teeth gently tugged at her skin, her breath hitched and she dug her nails into his shoulders.

"I haven't even started and you're already trembling," he taunted against her skin.

Xiaoyu pressed her teeth against her lower lip. She didn't trust herself to speak in coherent sentences. "Jerk," she bit out.

She felt him smile against her throat.

As he kissed and marked her skin, Xiaoyu felt herself being pulled deeper into his deliciously torturous seduction. It always surprised her how someone so powerful could touch her like she was made of glass. Worship her body until she feared for her own sanity.

Jin loved the same way he fought. Like he needed to prove something. Like every touch could possibly be his last. Like he was slowly but surely losing time.

Xiaoyu didn't understand his fears but she tried to chase them away with each kiss, caress and spoken words of love.

She loved him so much she almost felt consumed by it.

/End of Flashback/

The memories just kept coming unbidden. Xiaoyu didn't know if it was returning to the crime scene or being around Jin himself. All she knew was that she felt weighed down by the past. The her of back then would never have imagined leaving Jin.

She'd chased him to the ends of the world. Fought by his side, fought for him and even fought him. Because she was naive she truly believed love alone was enough. If she loved him hard enough, loved him enough to wash away his pain then surely she could change his fate with her bare hands.

But Xiaoyu had underestimated fate. Had foolishly thought her hands were strong enough.

Now she couldn't even remember what the last straw had been. Can't remember what hate filled words she'd said that last day before she left.

She'd just been so hurt. Holding onto her anger had someone lessened her anguish. If she was angry she didn't have to feel so betrayed. She didn't have to feel like her very heart was dying.

So she pushed all her memories back, fed on her anger so she wouldn't think about how much she blamed herself.

She blamed Jin for the horrible things that were happening, but mostly she blamed herself and her love that hadn't been strong enough to reach him.

Xiaoyu didn't want to trust in love. Love had blinded her to all the warning signs. Pushed her away from reason and the truth. Love was deceitful and so she didn't want it.

But that very same love was weakening her now. Crippling her and making her second guess everything.

"You're hesitating too much, I thought you intended to kill me. You won't get a better chance."

He was right of course. As they were, with her straddling his waist, her fingers curled around his neck and him on his back, hands trapped beneath each of her knees killing him was simply a matter of time.

How many minutes would it take? Two or maybe a bit longer than that? Vaguely Xiaoyu wondered when contemplating murder had become so natural.

She could feel her heart racing in her chest.

"Xiao."

Her shoulders tensed and she felt her fingers tighten, not enough to hinder his oxygen supply but the skin would probably bruise.

"Don't," she bit out.

"What?"

He was so calm. Too calm. Did he really think she wouldn't? Or did he just not care? Why was it that after all these years and she still didn't understand half the shit that went on his head?

"Don't call my name like that," she hissed.

They way he called her name had never changed. Even when everything between them had become a warzone and she told him just how much she hated him. He called her the same. Like she was his salvation and redeemer.

Her eyes were starting to burn now. Once this bed had been the place where they penned all their hopes for the future. Now it was a place they lied with their words and spoke a mangled truth with their bodies.

Xiaoyu didn't know how to feel anymore.

"Xiao-"

She leaned forward, their noses almost touching. "What did I say about calling my name like that?" she asked.

However before he could respond she pressed her lips against his mouth, her teeth biting and pulling at the soft flesh.

Honestly she didn't know who she was punishing anymore. Him or herself?

Did it even matter at this stage?

Surely one way or the other they were both going to hell.

/

And I was on the verge to scream
When you wouldn't scream about anything

/

End Note: Sorry for any errors. I worked on this and wanted to publish it before I forgot or lost inspiration.