A/N: This was in my story "The Lion and the Lamb", but I'm taking it out and putting it here. I hope you enjoy.
Disclaimer : I DON'T OWN HARRY POTTER!
(Draco's p.o.v.)
9:30 P.M.
She's a bloody lunatic! She's the most crazy person I have ever met. I am not going to be able to survive a whole night guarding the front of Hogwarts with her. She's packing books, and water bottles, and food, and whatever else she can fit into that darn bag of hers.
It's like she thinks we're going on a freakin' field trip!
She tried to get me to bring a bag of clothes. WHY WOULD I NEED A FLIPPIN' BAG OF CLOTHES TO GUARD HOGWARTS?
Anyway, now we're down at the entrance of Hogwarts. I'm sitting against the wall, and Granger is doing the same, but she has another bloody book in her hands. Her big buck teeth (Not that big anymore I've noticed.) are chewing on a Cheeto, whatever the heck that is.
Granger really likes Muggle junk food I've noticed. To me, this Cheeto thing looks like a frozen, orange worm.
"Would you like a Cheeto?" Granger asked me, closing her book and shoving the orange worm in my face.
I cautiously took it, and put it my mouth.
"It's alright..." I said.
YAH BLOODY RIGHT! THIS IS THE BEST SNACK I HAVE EVER EATEN!
Granger seemed to know that too, since she gave me the rest of the Cheeto bag. Gosh, with food like this, it seems almost alright to be a Muggle...
Did I really just think that?
10:05 P.M.
After eating that glorious food called a cheeto, I got bord and turned Granger's hair purple. She didn't even notice! Finally, I just told her, and she completely freaked out. Then she turned my hair pink.
BLOODY PINK!
She says she'll turn my hair back once I turn her hair back to it's original color.
Ya right, like that will happen.
10:06 P.M.
I want my hair back. Pink is NOT a good color on me.
10:07 P.M.
I just asked for my hair back, so she turned it purple.
I really hate her.
10:08 P.M.
I turned her hair red. She likes it. Stupid Mudblood.
10:09 P.M.
I turned her hair green now. We match.
10:10 P.M.
I WANT MY HAIR BACK!
10:20 P.M.
She finally turned it back, thank the Lord!
10:25 P.M.
"You're such a baby." I muttered to Granger, who was crying into her hands.
"YOU KILLED HIM!" Hermione exclaimed.
"IT WAS A FLIPPIN' SPIDER! YOU TOLD ME TO KILL IT!" I exclaimed back at her.
"YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO LISTEN!"
11:00 P.M.
She's still crying.
11:05 P.M.
I patted her on the back and she yelled "MURDERER!" in my ear.
11:06 P.M.
She just said something, but I can't hear her. Ya know, BECAUSE SHE BUSTED MY EARDRUMS!
11:30 P.M.
We had a funeral for the spider. We didn't bury it or anything. We just laid it to the side and said a few words.
10:36 P.M.
The spider just got up and walked away. Turns out it was never dead at all.
10:39 P.M.
I smashed the bug again. This time Granger didn't cry. She simply just opened up her water bottle and took a sip.
10:54 P.M.
Doritos are God's gift to the world!
12:03 P.M.
I just ran out of Doritos. Now I'm very sad.
12:10 P.M.
Hermione wanted to play a game of cards.
I dont, so I told her to shove them up her you-know-what. She's very quiet now.
12:30 P.M.
She just turned my hair green... again.
12:35 P.M.
We just heard a rustle in the bushes, but it turned out to just be a raccoon, who ran off after seeing us. Hermione said it's because it saw my hair.
12:50 P.M.
She wouldn't change my hair back unless I complemented her. I couldn't think of anything so I made something up.
1:03 P.M.
I love my hair.
1:45 P.M.
Granger just fell asleep. REVENGE TIME!
2:05 P.M.
.
2:07 P.M.
HA!
2:10 P.M.
I really have to go to the bathroom.
2:16 P.M.
..
12:30 P.M.
I'm done now.
12:32 P.M.
HAHAHAHAHAHA!
LOSER! You actually thought I was done laughing!
3:09 A.M.
Granger just now woke up. She hasn't noticed my revenge and I don't really feel like telling her.
4:02 A.M.
She is so clueless.
5:06 A.M.
I'm never telling her.
6:00 A.M.
We're going inside now. I can't wait till breakfast.
Breakfast that morning
I'm dead.
Lunch
Still dead.
Dinner
Deader than a doormat.
That night
I'M ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE
3 seconds later
Nah, just kidding. I'm still dead.
A minute later
Or am I...
Midnight
OK, I'm not dead anymore. I've puked all the slugs up Granger gave me, and almost all of the wounds are gone. Mrs. Pomfrey would like me to help Granger, and I told her I rather not.
You're probably wondering what I'm talking about. You see, I sort of cast a spell upon her. All I did was write 'Malfoy Rules' and 'Draco is my hero!', and 'I want DM NOWWW!', etc, etc, etc, over every inch of her body. Now Granger is stuck with them. Don't expect me to erase 'I LOVE DRACO' off of the Mudblood's forehead, when she made me puke up slugs for a whole day, as well as breaking almost all my bones with a Breaklo Bonea spell.
Oh, how I love revenge.