Zelda12343 - And thus the plot begins...
Poor Romeo. He got rejected. I wonder what his gang are going to say.
Well, they waited.
"This sucks" complained Hermia, squatting on the floor and stretching her legs out on the curb.
"Don't you worry someone will come and trip over you?" asked Benvolio.
"Nah. They should look where they're going anyway. I was here first" replied Hermia.
They'd bought snacks from the supermarket, complained about Eugene (aka Lord Capulet) trying to get Hermia to stop hanging around them, talked about the scary deputy head teacher at their school and did impressions of her, talked about that new film that was coming out, admired Hermia's Doc Martin's, moaned about Benvolio's sister's obsession with Twilight, talked about their favourite bands, and now they were still waiting.
"Why does he do this?" grumbled Mercutio "It's so pathetic"
"Tell me about it" Hermia rolled her eyes.
"We've been friends since we were all like, one. We're dead close, but this is the one thing that breaks us apart. Romeo is my oldest and closest friend, but sometimes I debate why I even stay hanging around with him when he acts like this" Mercutio went on.
"What am I, the next door neighbour?" asked Benvolio.
"No! We're all close. But you are a prude, so I can't bond with you over dirty jokes or anything"
"I'm not a prude!"
"Yes, you are!"
"I'm not!"
"You are the most innocent teenage boy I have ever met" interrupted Hermia "You need corrupting. Want me to enlighten you on the facts of life?"
Mercutio burst out sniggering, as Benvolio flushed a deep red.
"No...no thank you. I already have a girlfriend, and I, um, love her very much"
Before Hermia and Mercutio could embarrass Benvolio any further, Romeo shuffled onto the scene, looking defeated.
"Did you see her?" asked Benvolio.
"Yes"
"Oh" said Hermia "Ring-a-ding-ding!"
"She was with Tybalt" snivelled Romeo.
"What did I tell you?" sighed Hermia.
"He told me I didn't know what love was"
"Hang on, Tybalt's intelligent?" interrupted Mercutio.
"He told me they were going back to his place"
"To get it on with each other" interrupted Hermia.
"She said she wore a Chastity Ring, would be attending and making a speech at the Verona Belle's Chastity Ball, and said Orlando was the only boy who respected her in that aspect and she didn't want to date anyone"
"Well, that's obviously a lie if she's with Tybalt" interrupted Benvolio.
"She said that as her friend and relative he protected her virtue from distractions. I don't get it!"
Hermia and the two boys just burst out laughing.
"Oh, Romeo. Just give up" said Hermia.
"No! You've said something to her, haven't you? You hate her, and want to ruin her life. You're jealous!" yelled Romeo.
"What did you say?" asked Mercutio.
"I said she's said something to Rosaline to make her hate me. She's jealous of her, isn't she?"
"Not a chance in hell!" exclaimed Hermia.
"Hermia is her own person. She's cool. Why would she be jealous of Rosaline?" flushed Benvolio.
"Romeo, you've done enough. Go round Hamlet's house, pick flowers, and angst with him. I'm sick to the death of you and your moods" instructed Mercutio, shoving his fingers in his ears. Romeo retreated away, muttering something about Mercutio being a rubbish friend. Benvolio sighed, and leant against the wall.
"I hate it when he does this"
"It's always him messing up our group with his pretence of being 'in love'" mimicked Mercutio.
"I hate it when there's an argument here" sighed Hermia "I really do. I prefer it when we all get along. You know, I think it's about high time I put a stop to Rosaline screwing with Romeo's head. This is taking the biscuit, do you know what I mean? I think it's time I planned a little revenge. What do you two say?"