What I own: Bordeaux colored Grecian style bridesmaids dress I am dying to wear again, a really pretty white bowl with cherry blossoms on it, a light pink kitchen aide mixer and a brand new kitty named Miss Josie Jane Ashleigh.
What I do not: Twilight. Despite a strong physical resemblance I am not Stephanie Meyer, I am not making any money off of this and no copyright infringement is intended.
Okay so this is totally different than anything I have ever written…. A little pink sequin plot bunny hopped into my head and wouldn't leave. I promise things are probably not going to stay how they seem. Any of my regular readers know me and KNOW that I would rather make out with a glass bottle than write cannon. Lots of love to my pre-reader Roxxxie25 . Thanks for your input babe! All the love in the world to my amazing wifey Sky Chaser. She is the cherry to my cheesecake, the chocolate in my cookies and the Swiss meringue butter cream on my cake. I also wrote this entire chapter in a WC with her. Go and read her fic, Remember Me Tomorrow. Right Now. I will wait for you to come back. This has NOT been Beta'd so any and all mistakes are mine and mine alone. Reviews blow my skirt up and are rewarded with sneak peeks and pole dances.
A catch in my throat, Choke, Torn into pieces, I won't, no,I don't want to be this, But I won't let this build up inside of me
~Vermillion pt. 2, Slipknot
I wove my way back through the dark cold hallways, my feet silent on the floor. The scene in the study played over and over again in my mind, Edwards smug command and the blonds sly smirk flashing continually in front of my eyes. My feet led me to the large kitchen, an electrical hum from the stainless steel appliances greeting my ears like a friend as the stainless steel surfaces glittered in the moonlight that flooded in from the wall of windows. I headed to the French doors leading to the pool and paused, my stomach growling. I tried to remember what I had eaten throughout the evening and, with the exception of a few small hors d'ourves I had only had the 4 glasses of champagne. Quickly turning back and opening the fridge, the cool, antiseptic light sparkling off of my dress and jewels. I removed the ingredients for a sandwich and set them on the oak topped center island. I tossed my shoes and bag on the floor in front of the doors and silently moved around the large room, gathering knives, cutting boards and a plate before glancing at what was in front of me. I cut, sliced and chopped, the familiar actions soothing me and in no time I had soft French goat cheese, ripe heirloom tomatoes, peppery arugula and juicy, cold smoked chicken arranged on a crusty French demi-baguette. Slicing the sandwich in half I set it on a delicate white china plate and returned my fixings to the refrigerator, snagging a ramekin of strawberry goat cheese crème brulee and a bottle of Evian before shutting the door and plunging the room into near darkness again.
Balancing my snack precariously I headed back to the French doors, cautiously gathering my shoes and bag before opening the glass doors and stepping out into the warm, fresh night air. The grass was lush under my feet as I headed towards the pool, the dark water sparkling and endless in the moonlight. My feet hit the cool, smooth flagstones of the patio and I quickly maneuvered my way to a chair, dropping ungracefully into it and quickly devouring my sandwich, relishing the clean flavors and varying textures as my hunger was sated. I eyed my dessert critically, glancing back and forth between it and the pool, deciding on the latter first. Glancing back at the house I found it completely dark, with the exception of a dim golden light from a small third floor room I knew to be the study. Standing I unclasped the silver chiffon and bead belt at my waist and dropped it on a chair next to me. Carefully, I slipped the thin straps off of my shoulders and slowly lowered the bodice down my torso and wiggled my hips slightly, causing the silk and beads to fall in a pool at my feet. I stepped out of the expensive puddle and walked naked towards the pool, dipping my toe in to test the water. It was gorgeous. Without delay I dove in, slicing through the crisp water.
The pool seemed endless as I swam to the bottom, my hands brushing along the smooth, cool tile before I turned and returned to the surface. I kicked my legs up and floated on my back, staring up at the endless sky. The salt in the water helped me float and stung my eyes, the crisp burn reminding me of tears that had yet to be shed. Staring up at the infinite sky my mind, once again, cycled through the events of the evening and I admitted to myself, finally after four years of marriage that I did not love my husband, and I don't think I ever had. Memories flickered through my mind: the endless charity functions, for the hospital where he or his mother picked out everything from my jewelry to my hairstyle, making sure I looked perfect, the angry glances and blatant dismissals of any and all ideas I may have had, the numerous 'don't worry your beautiful head' remarks, he barely once a month sex with Edward that was far from satisfying. It occurred to me now that, despite my desires, EDWARD had always been the one to dismiss my advances, no matter what I tried. I opened an account at La Perla, read all the books I could and still? Nothing. I now realized that odds were that he was most likely getting his needs met elsewhere. I smirked bitterly at the thought and dove back under the cool water, kicking strongly towards the side of the pool and pulling myself out, the cool breeze hitting me and causing my skin to erupt into goose bumps and my nipples to pebble.
I stepped out of the water and padded over to the lounge chair, gathering my belongings in my wet arms. The night was full of sounds: the soft bird calls, the rustle of the wind against the grass and the steady plop as the salty droplets cascaded from my still drenched body and hit the hard ground below. My possessions in tow I headed towards the guest house that stood one hundred yards away. My feet had once again hit the grass when I paused and turned back towards the pool. Clumsily shifting my clothing, water and my treasured desert into one hand, I narrowed my eyes and sent the delicate, antique china plate, part of a set that Edward and I had received as a wedding gift from His parents, hurling against the wooden lounge chair. Upon hitting the hard surface the plate shattered spectacularly into endless shards, the sound like music to my ears. With a small smile I turned back towards the guest house. Entering, I locked the door and sighed as my feet sank into the plush ivory carpet and I fumbled to the light.
The 'cottage' as it was called by Elizabeth, was simply a one floor, slightly scaled down copy of the main house and included a full professional kitchen, two fire places a hot tub, 2 bedrooms and, my favorite part, an antique claw foot tub. Heading straight for the master bedroom I draped my gown over a chair and set my shoes and bag beside it before heading to the beautiful bathroom. The room was beautiful and surprisingly understated, the walls a soothing, pale blue and the fixtures a pale cream. The tub stood in the center of the room and I quickly turned on the water as hot as it could go before sprinkling in some lavender bath salts from Provence. Swirling them in the steaming water I crossed to the full length mirror and I did something I had not done in almost 4 years: I blatantly assessed my body: My pale, creamy skin still shimmered slightly from the salt water and Edwards beloved family jewels still hung at my throat and ears. I was slim but still curvy, my legs muscular from the years of ballet as a child and my stomach was flat and smooth, a testament to yoga and Pilates. My breasts were still firm and high, my waist tiny and my hips just rounded enough to define a slight hourglass figure. Nails, both fingers and toes, were perfectly manicured and French tipped, at the insistence of Elizabeth. I finally dug my eyes to my face and frowned: My dark eyes looked hollow and dead, my full lips pale and streaks of mascara and shadow trailed down my cheeks. My hair hung about my shoulders in a riot of salt kissed curls and snarls, caught here and there by an errant bobby pin. I through back to the girl I had been five years prior, and I HAD been a girl, before meeting Edward and entering this life. I had dreams and hopes, aspirations. I wanted a career and a family, sports games on Saturdays and a commute to some city Monday through Friday. I had a sparkle in my eyes, a genuine smile and something I had long since lost to my husband's needs: hope. Suddenly disgusted with myself I grasped a lead crystal vase from the creamy marble counter, took a few steps back and threw it at the mirror, splintering my reflection into a million jagged shards with a musical crash. I turned my eyes away from my splintered reflection and walked to the tub, carefully stepping in and letting the warm water easy my muscles, the scent easing me into relaxation. I leaned my dark, wet head on the back of the tub and finally let the hot tears cascade down my cheeks. Tears that were not for my husband, his fucked up family or even his infidelity but, rather, for the little girl that I had been and for the dreams that she had lost. Once they started they crashed through me like a tidal wave, followed by long choking sobs. I lost track of time but when I finally got out of the tub the water was icy and I was shivering. Without bothering to dry off I padded back into the bedroom, turned down the thick, soft comforter that rested atop the mattress and crawled, still damp, into the soft sheets, clutching the down around me like a cocoon and drifted into a restless, dreamless sleep.
Pups fic rec corner: Come, sit on my lap my little pervlings, I have an unusual little treat for you today. This may not be for everyone but just give it a shot. First up we have A Particularly Vivid Dream by Kkalmm. This is not your usual J/E pairing… it's got a beautiful, hot as fuck twist. And what might that twist be, you ask? *grins evilly* I'm not telling, you'll have to read it! For my second fic we have the unbelievable Forget Me Today by my illustrious wifey, Sky Chaser. This is a companion piece to Remember Me Tomorrow and just makes me melt. Seriously. I am a puddle of Pups scented goo every time this woman updates. Now lovelies, go, read and review. And don't forget to tell them Pups sent you!