Ch 18 Giving In.

Raph rode his motorcycle through the streets of NYC, zig zagging between the cars at top speed to where Leo had his arms around him so tight that Raph actually felt a warm feeling run through him. He patted Leo's hand when they came to a stop signal and laughed.

"Don't worry Leo," He told him. "I won't let anything happen to you."

"I know." Leo responded as he relaxed his hold. "When did you get communication devices in the helmets?"

Raph chuckled again. "My bro Donnie," He explained. "When I was taking motorcycle lessons, he was on the back one day and was practically yelling at me to slow down." Raph was now laughing hard. "But when I wouldn't, I told him it was because I couldn't hear him."

Leo nodded in understanding. "Smart guy," He muttered then yelped when Raph sped off leaving black tire streaks in the road. He took a calming breath and looked around, "So where are we?" He asked when he realized they were in an area he had never been to.

Raph again patted his hand. "We're down by the docks."

"What's here?"

"You'll see." Raph said with a light chuckle.

Raph drove the motorcycle toward an abandon warehouse and they rode the bike inside. Leo looked around curiously as Raph maneuvered the bike inside and into a large elevator. As soon as they were inside, Raph pulled on a chain and the elevator closed and started up to the next floor.

"I and…um…. I found this place by accident one day a few years back," Raph was explaining as the elevator went up. "Casey and I come here on occasion with our significant others to have….fun."

Leo frowned as Raph spoke, something in his voice made him sound as though he were disappointed, but Leo decided to let it go for now. "So you've been here with Mona?" Leo asked as the elevator came to a stop and Raph once again pulled on a chain to have the door open.

Raph nodded slowly. "And others." He muttered once again dejectedly. He maneuvered the bike inside and parked it in just outside the elevator. Leo surveyed his surroundings. The room they were now in looked to have been an office at one time, at the far end of the room there was a desk, behind that a small counter with a coffee maker and to the right of it was a small refrigerator. File cabinets lined a wall to the left of the desk, and to the side of them, directly in front of Leo, was a large futon.

"So….what do we do now?" Leo asked as Raph turned the bike off and put the kickstand down.

"We could get off the bike." Raph said slowly.

Leo smiled and slowly slid himself off the bike. He removed his helmet and watched as Raph slowly removed his. "No," Leo said as they put the helmets down. He took Raph's hand as the green eyed turtle got off the bike. "I mean," Leo started them toward the futon. "What do we do now?" He asked again in a more forceful and seductive voice.

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Raph smiled as Leo got them on the futon and brought Raph down on top of him. They pressed their lips together and Leo wrapped his legs around Raph's middle. For the next several moments, they kissed deeply and hungrily until Leo rolled them over and sat up. Looking intently at each other, Leo began to remove his shirt while Raph removed his. They pulled apart and soon both had the rest of their clothes off, Leo laid on his shell and spread his legs wide. "Take me Raph," Leo urged as Raph moved himself in between Leo's legs. "Take me now and…." He lowered his tail exposing his entrance. "Take me hard."

Raph spread his legs and slowly his cock came out, he was hard and dripping with pre-cum. He lubed Leo's entrance then laid down and put his face in the crock of Leo's neck and began to gently thrust into him. Leo leaned his head back and churred as Raph brought him to the brink of ecstasy over and over again. As Raph moved himself in and out of the blue eyed turtle, he brought himself up slightly and looked down at Leo.

Leo's eyes were closed, his mouth slightly open and his face gleaned with sweat as Raph took him gently yet vigorously. Leo opened his eyes when he realized Raph was looking down at him. The two stared intently at each other, neither saying a word as Raph rode him. Both gritted their teeth as Raph sped up and began thrusting harder. He was ready to cum and he could see Leo was ready for him to. Raph sat up and Leo released his cock allowing Raph to play with him as he thrusted harder into him.

Leo grabbed the pillow beneath him and threw his head back and let out a long loud churr as Raph pumped him while he shoved his cock inside him hard. Raph watched in fascination as Leo thrashed his legs and withered beneath him. He was holding himself back from coming; he wanted to watch Leo be in pain for just a little longer before he released himself. He pumped Leo's cock harder and faster while he gritted his teeth.

"You're hurting yourself Raph," Leo said as he began to climax. "Let yourself go," He pleaded as his legs and body squirmed beneath Raph.

"Not yet." Raph said through gritted teeth. "I want you to cum first."

Leo gritted his teeth and threw his head back as he finally came into Raph's hand. Moments later, Raph leaned his head back as he too came inside Leo's hole. He fell on top of Leo and the two kissed long and hard as they came down from their sexual high. After they broke apart, Leo looked up at Raph and ginned. "My turn," He told him as he rolled them over.

Before Raph could say anything, Leo moved himself in between Raph's legs, spread his cheeks wide and thrusted himself hard inside. Raph let out a loud gasp and started churring as Leo moved himself inside. "Tell me you like it." Leo demanded as sped up.

"Oh God yes Leo." Raph cried out as Leo pounded into him. "I want it so bad." He yelled. He panted hard and looked up Leo with determined eyes. "I want you so bad." He told him in between gritted teeth.

"Then have me Raph." Leo told him as he grabbed Raph's hips and pushed himself hard into him. "Have me and claim me for your own."

Raph allowed his cock to come out and Leo pumped him fast making the green eyed turtle squirm beneath him as his cock sprayed cum into Leo's hand. Leo came inside hard and heavy, panting and gasping for breath as the two turtles felt themselves rising into the very heights of love. Leo lowered himself on top of Raph and they wrapped their arms around each other. After several minutes, Leo removed his cock from Raph's hole and tucked it back in.

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Leo rolled off Raph and looked up at the ceiling. "Thank you Raph." He whispered.

Raph looked over at him. "For what?"

"For showing me I was able to love again," Leo told him. "And for loving me."

Raph rolled over and propped himself on his elbow. "I think I've loved you from the moment I saw you." He told him. "I just wished you'd let me tell you."

"I couldn't let you Raph." Leo said.

"But why Leo?" Raph looked to him. "You know Mona and I are no longer together, right?"

Leo nodded. "You're brothers told me." He admitted. "And I've noticed for the past week Mona doesn't seem to be hanging around you the way she use to."

"So why have you been trying hard not to talk to me all this week?"

Leo sighed and sat up in bed. "There's just so much going on right now Raph." Leo explained. "And I just don't want to deal with more."

"What things Leo?" Raph asked sitting up. "What things are you dealing with?" Leo looked away and shook his head. "Please tell me," He urged.

Leo sighed deeply. "Before coming out here, I broke up with a guy who was very controlling," He looked at Raph hard. "I don't like to be controlled Raph." He told him adamantly, "And that's something my dad's been trying to do since we got here." Leo laughed and shook his head. "I'm still dealing with my mom's death and my dad's been a real jerk about so much lately and…"

"Is he the one that gave you that bruise?" Raph asked.

Leo looked at him worriedly. "Uh…well,"

"The bruise on your plastron." Raph said, gently stroking his chest up and down where the bruise had been. "He did that, not Fong, right?"

Leo looked away shamefully and nodded. "You know," Leo began in a whisper, "My father has never called me son, or hugged me or told me he was proud of me." Leo sniffed and wiped his face. "He wasn't even there for me on my birthday or sent me a message of any kind to let me know he was thinking about me." Leo got out of the bed and started to put his clothes back on. "I mean, my father's never really been there for me or my mom and sometimes I think the only reason my mom married him is because she felt obligated to since she was pregnant with me but ever since my mom died he's been more distance than before. I'm trying so hard to get over my mom's death and he's not there to help me."

Raph looked down sadly. "You never get over someone's death Leo," He told him. "Especially if that person is someone you really care about." Leo looked over at him. "You may at some point come to accept their death," Raph continued, "But you never really get over it."

Leo sat on the bed and looked at Raph tenderly. "You said you're mom died when you were seven, right?"

Raph nodded. "And even long after her death, I still couldn't get over losing her."

Leo watched as Raph slowly began to get himself dress. "But you at least accepted it, right?"

"It took a long time," Raph admitted, "and I went through a lot before I even attempted to accept it but eventually…." Raph sat back down and looked at Leo with a guilty look. "I allowed someone to help me come to terms with what happened."

Leo frowned. "What do you mean you 'allowed' someone to help you'?"

Raph laid down and put his hands under his head. He looked up at the ceiling and swallowed hard as memories came back to him. "After my mom died, I just refused to accept her death." He began, "My dad took my bros and me to counseling but it didn't really help….at least it didn't really help me." Leo laid his head on Raph's shoulder and Raph put an arm around his shell. "And as time went on, I became more of a trouble kid by giving my dad and my bros a hard time; I started skipping school; letting my grades slide; and eventually, in middle school, I started running around with a gang."

"The Purple Dragons." Leo whispered.

Raph nodded. "And nothing my dad did or said could make me stop hanging with them."

Leo propped himself on his elbow and looked down at Raph. "Did you do more than just hang with them?" He looked around the room. "Like in here, did you do more?"

Raph nodded. "Yeah, we found this place and…." Raph sat up and swallowed hard. "We did a lot here," he confessed. "We drank, did drugs, and screwed each other as well as…." He looked over at Leo. "Any drugged up person looking for a good time."

"When did Mona come along?" Leo asked knowingly

Raph smiled at him. "I met Mona in the ninth grade." He said. "She tried to help me get me off the drugs and get away from the dragons but they had too strong of a hold on me." He shook his head. "Then late one night, the dragons and I were driving around and we went into a liquor store, Fong had a fake id and wanted us to buy some hard stuff." Raph huffed, "At least that's what I thought. I went to the back of the store to get some beer and the next thing I knew I heard a loud noise in the front of the store, sounded like a car backfiring, and then Fong starts screaming at us to get the drinks and run." Raph let out a small laugh. "And boy did I run." He said wryly, "It took a second to realize Fong had fired a gun, I got so scared I almost pissed myself."

Leo chuckled lightly. "So what happened?"

"I ran to Mona's house and begged her to help me." Raph continued. "But not only would she not let me into her house, she helped me by calling the police and getting me arrested." Raph suddenly grinned widely. "And that was probably the best thing that ever happened to me." He laughed.

"So what happened in the store?"

Raph's look sobered. "Fong shot the clerk and took the money out of the cash register." Raph told him. "But the guy survived and was able to pick Fong, Tsoi and Sid out of a line up, but he never saw me so after I got arrested I was put on probation whereas the others were sent to juvie. The judge told me I should be grateful someone was willing to do what Mona did." Raph nodded. "And ever since then, I guess I was grateful," He looked at Leo sternly. "But that's all I ever was Leo." Raph said. "I was grateful, but I was never in love with her or wanted her the way I want you." Raph laid back on the bed and brought Leo down with him. "Thing was, I could never tell her that." He said as he wrapped his arms around Leo and brought him into a hug. "Not until you came along did I actually realize what I felt for her was just gratefulness and even sex with her was just that….sex." He stared up into Leo's eyes and stroked his cheek. "Now I know what it is I've been wanting all this time."

Leo smiled and bent down; they pressed their lips together and kissed passionately. After they broke the kiss, Leo sat back up and looked away from Raph. "I have to tell you something Raph." He said with a low and scared voice.

Raph sat up and looked at Leo with concern. "What is it?"

"I really do care a great deal about you but…..I can't…." Leo took a deep breath. "I can't love you." He looked over at him. "Not the way I want to anyway."

Raph looked at him in bewilderment. "Why," He made look at him when Leo attempted to look away. "We just made love and it was the best sex I've ever had in my life," He stroked his cheek. "And I can tell it was something very special for you too so why Leo?" He demanded. "What aren't you telling me?"

"Because..." Leo took a deep, shuddering breath and let a tear fall. "I'm dying Raph."

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Once again a big thank you to all of you who continue to review, and a special thank you to Jin234, I'm glad to hear you still enjoy my 'Traverler's Series. Everyone keep those reviews coming. Good or bad I love reading them. Peace :)