Author's Note: Emotion is one of the hardest things to capture in a story. I believe a story is a well written one if I can feel what the Pokemon (or other character) is feeling, which I can do in all of the stories I have in my favorite section. Then again, I have an extreme overactive imagination, which allows me to imagine the scenes in stories much easier. It also allows the ideas, but not the length of my stories (an explanation for another time). I've tried to capture the feeling in my stories, though it sometimes eludes me. This will most likely be the most emotional and soul searching chapter in this story, hint the title of it. Don't worry (or worry if you're the other case), there is no mature content (as I deem it) in this chapter. That's for later on. Sorry about the long Author's Note this time, but it's also such a long chapter (in my opinion, not yours) that I had to separate it into two chapters (not parts, chapters).

Light's Adventures

Chapter 16: Is It Love?

It took a second for what she said to sink in. "You love me?" was all Light could say.

Cream turned her head away and nodded. It looked like a large weight was taken off of her shoulders. "That's why I have to leave," she said, though it was in a low whisper.

Light's already stretched attention now snapped to this new statement. "Wait, what! What do you mean you have to leave?" he asked.

"Look at me, I fought. You know how much I dislike fighting. I can't continue with Red there, not with her wanting you, also. I hate hurting Pokemon. All fighting does is bring hurt. Besides, you'll never like me after what I did. I was so obsessed with the fight, I hurt you. I hurt you, just for trying to stop something I don't like," she said, her shoulders starting to shake more and more as she did with tears starting to form in her eyes. Finally, she broke out crying completely. Her shoulders shook as the tears ran down her face in two little lines.

Out of instinct, Light put his tail on her back and started to comfort her. She fell against his side and started to cry into his shoulder. Light winced in pain as she touched the slash marks, but didn't pull away. "Shhh, shhh, it's okay, it's okay," he said as he tried to sooth her.

She slowly stopped crying and sat back up, long red lines on blood on her side from where she was pressed against him. She started as she saw what she had done, "See, even now, I'm hurting you. I can't do anything right." She was about to cry, when she felt something touch her chin and apply some pressure. She looked up.

Once she was looking at him in the face, Light stopped raising his tail and starting talking, "Stop right there, you do many things correctly. I don't care about the wound. It doesn't feel that bad, really. I've already forgiven you for it anyway, and I won't have you punishing yourself anymore for it. I stopped you from attacking, which means that I took the blow. You weren't aiming for me, you were aiming at Red. She's the one you need to apologize to, not me. Also, you don't have to fight if you don't want to; Red isn't exactly the one to look for them. Just don't start duking it out with her and you won't end up fighting." Light was actually surprised that he was able to give a lecture that long.

Cream looked away from him, "So? Do you think Red will stop now? She doesn't like me at all now. She didn't do anything and I attacked her, it's as simple as that. There's no reason to forgive me."

"From what you said, she talked about me, so I'll tell her to refrain from that while around you. Also, I'll convince her to forgive you; don't worry. Red's not one to hold grudges. Just look at Blaze and her. They're friends again already after that big fight," Light reasoned.

Cream continued to look away and finally sighed, "Okay, let's go back."

"How'd you get out anyway?" Light asked.

"I got Ace to open it for me," she said.

So that's why he wasn't on the windowsill, Light thought.

They made it back to the Pokemon Center quickly and went back in. Everyone was still asleep, so Light decided to talk to Red tomorrow. He curled up and tried to get to sleep. However, it took a long while before he fell asleep. He still had a question to answer himself: Do I love her back?

(0)

Morning came sooner than Light would have liked. The window was once again closed and Ace back on the windowsill as he awoke. He found that everyone seemed asleep, but with the sun already slightly above the horizon, he doubted that was the case. Using his power, he quickly found Cream, Red, and Ace were only feigning sleep.

Light sighed, knowing he couldn't hide from it forever, though he wished he could. He jumped off the couch and approached. He felt the eyes of Cream and Ace on him as he did. He came up to Red and sat by her. She visibly tensed, waiting.

"You and I both know you're awake, Red," he said softly.

She uncurled and sat up, not meeting his eyes.

Light sighed again, "Look, Red, I've already gone through this with Cream. Don't make this difficult on me. Cream told me what happened, including her attacking first. Trust me; I know what her attacks felt like. She was wrong to attack you, and she recognizes that. She wants to sincerely apologize for her actions. Will you let her?"

Red nodded, but didn't say anything.

"Okay, one more thing. Cream likes me. What made her lash out, were the . . . comments she heard you say about something you . . . wanted to happen. So please don't continue them while she is nearby, okay?" Light asked.

Red nodded again, still not saying anything.

"Good," Light said with a nod. He turned back to the couch and jumped back onto it.

Seeing he was done, Cream slowly uncurled from under the chair she had slept under after they go back. Cream slowly approached Red. After what seemed an eternity, she was in front of Red. Cream kept her eyes on her paws as she said, "R-Red, I'm s-sorry for what I-I did to you and w-what I tried to do. It was immature of me. Will you forgive me?"

Red looked up slightly and said, "O-okay, I forgive you. Will you forgive me for saying those things in front of you? I . . . I didn't know you liked Light, too."

Cream nodded, "Yeah, I forgive you."

"Thanks," Red said.

Cream went back under her chair and curled back up, as did Red. Light sighed with relief as he heard them make up. Then he remembered his other dilemma: Do I love her back? Which also created another dilemma: What is love?

Great, he now had a dilemma he couldn't even start to figure out, while the other . . . how did he even start to found out the other? Light wanted to pound his head into the cushions, but didn't want to attract attention.

Finally, he fell into a calm doze. Nick woke him, however, to go and train. Blaze was to come, too, though the rest were staying behind. Light watched as Blaze gave Blair a lick to the cheek before following Nick into the hallway. Maybe he could ask Blaze.

After Nick shut the door, they headed outside. As they walked, Light attempted to find out information. He turned to Blaze and, making sure not to have any teasing tones in his voice, he asked "So, are you and Blair mates now?"

Blaze didn't answer at first, but finally said, "I still haven't decided. I lost the first Pokemon I loved. I don't know if I'm ready for a mate, yet. Why do you ask?"

"Oh, well I have this . . . problem, and I need to know what the problem is, before I solve it," Light said.

"And that has to do with me and Blair how?" Blaze asked.

"Well, the problem really comes down to a question, but part of the question, I don't understand. That's what I thought you could help me with. I need to know what . . . what love is," Light answered.

Blaze stared at his feet as they walked for a little before saying, "You're talking about love that you would have for a mate. That's why you asked if we were mates."

Light nodded.

"Well . . . I don't know how to describe it, really. In fact, I don't think anyone could. It's something that can't be expressed in words. Love is joy, life, and happiness and comes in different forms, like the love for family members, the love for a mate, or the love for a kit," Blaze said, "I guess the best way to describe it is the way I feel, or rather felt.

"The first time I fell in love, it didn't last long, not even a day, but I still felt it. It's a burning desire that . . . that keeps you going. It's the desire that, no matter what, you will do what your mate needs to be happy. It gives you the desire to protect. It gives you the strength to protect. It's a feeling that isn't like anything else. It's something you never forget, no matter what. It allows you to accept death in order to keep your mate safe. It's an awesome feeling and only intensifies as it is returned and nurtured. It's something you truly need to be happy with your mate. . . . Does that answer your question?"

"Not answer it, but it does let me understand it. And for it being indescribable, you sure did a good job," Light said.

Blaze chuckled and shook his head, "No, I didn't even come close, Light, not even close."

"So . . . do you have that desire for Blair?" Light asked.

"I'm unsure," Blaze admitted.

"Wait, you just said all that and you can't recognize it?" Light asked.

Blaze shook his head, "There's another factor. I've lost my first love. It may be that my grief is clouding my vision and making me think there's something there that isn't. I also may be making a wrong decision to satisfy a promise to her that I haven't been keeping lately. I don't want to make a wrong choice. So, I have to think about it with a clear head, and try to figure it out. There's also another element, though I'm sure it's not a factor with my decision," Blaze said. "Wait, something else can blind you from the feeling?" Light asked, dumbfounded. How would he keep up with all this?

"Yes, it's called lust. Lust is a feeling that seems like love, but after a little, becomes nothing. It's a horrible, horrible thing to have. It's what humans call one of the seven deadly sins. And yes, lust is deadly. When you desire for something, but not truing caring for it, just yourself and your gain," Blaze said.

Light wondered how he had missed all these powerful things in the world for so long. Then he remembered he hadn't. He had saw love whenever Cream had looked at him, though that was rare. He had saw lust in the Glameow's eyes at the day care. He was sure that's what it was now. He would have been blinder than a Zubat to miss it.

"Thank you for this, Blaze. That will really help me," Light thanked.

"Hello? Pokemon to trainer, I need your attention!" Nick shouted, waving his hands. Light was sure that this wasn't the first time he had been yelling. Then Light looked around and noticed that they had stopped.

Sorry, we were too caught up talking, Light thought to Nick.

(0)

Light landed hard on the ground, again.

"Light, if you don't fight back, I might as well use a tree or large rock," Blaze said.

"Sorry, I'm a little spaced out right now," Light apologized.

"Not just right now. You've been spacing out for the last five hours! Don't you hurt from all the times I've hit you?"

Light shook his head. He didn't feel any pain; in fact, he didn't feel anything, really. "Not really. Why?" Light asked.

Blaze looked shocked. "Light, that's the fourteenth time I've hit you with Dig and I've already hit you thrice with Iron Tail. Are you sure you're alright?" Blaze asked.

Light shrugged, "I don't really know. I'm not really feeling anything right now. Are you sure you hit me fourteen times? Also, I don't remember us dueling for five hours."

Blaze obtained a worried face, which really worried Light. "Maybe I hit your head or something. Come on, let's get you checked over by Nick," Blaze said, trotting over to Nick who was reading a small book while sitting on a fountain.

Nick looked up as they got close, "Are you done practicing Dig and your new Iron Tail? Blaze you look worried. Is everything okay?" Nick bent down and looked Blaze in the eye.

He says there may be something wrong with me, Nick. I don't remember being hit with Iron Tail three times, Dig fourteen times, or that we've been practicing for five hours, Light told him.

Nick quickly looked at his watch, "Oh . . . it has been five hours. Man, I've been reading that book a while. Now, Light . . . do you feel something different or something wrong?"

Light shook his head, No, but I have been thinking of something recently, though it's hard to believe that was for five hours. Or . . . maybe it was . . . Oww. The last part came out both mentally and verbally. Suddenly, in a rush, all of the pain came back. Okay, I remember now. Sorry, I spaced out so much I forgot. I need to pay more attention.

"I'd say," Nick said. "Well, it's time to go back. Actually, it was time to go back an hour ago . . ."

"Light, you amaze me sometimes. You really didn't remember the pain?" Blaze asked, a grin on his face.

"I didn't until now. Do you really have to hit that hard?" Light asked.

"It was training. Besides, you never moved and took each blow head on. Do you know what happened?" Blaze asked.

"Well, I guess what I was thinking on took my mind off my physical ailments for the moment," Light said.

They headed back to the Pokemon Center and Light summarized everything he had been 'thinking' about, preparing him for what was coming next. He had been focused on his dilemma. He had asked himself several times, but now he was sure he had the correct answer.

He had concentrated on every feeling he had had for Cream. Mostly it had been confusion on why she acted. He had started at the beginning, when he had saved her from the Nidoking. He had saved her, but then again, he was trying to save every Pokemon around the area at the time. That had been his instinct to save a helpless Pokemon, not love.

Then he had turned to when she had been caught. He had thought she was a pretty normal Eevee besides when she was being shy, but who was he to judge what a normal Eevee was? He did remember how he had loved talking to her before they had gone into the Diglett Cave. He had loved trying to find out about her, getting past her shyness, but then again, he loved challenges, so he was unsure if that meant anything either.

He did remember his first instincts when he had after her, though. When she started to cry, it had hurt him, at least emotional. His first instinct was to protect, shelter her, and to comfort her. He remembered letting her cry on his shoulder, and trying to soothe her, while trying to fight back the pain of the blow. Then there was the blow itself. He had taken it, but his first thought was to ignore and find out what was bothering Cream. He was instantaneous in forgiving her, and he was unsure if he would have done that for someone else. When he had seen her face then with tears and pain, it tore at his heart and left a permanent image in his head.

Then he thought about her as a Pokemon. She was shy, at least around him and new Pokemon. She was polite and made friends easily. She was kind and gentle, at least when not being provoked. Whenever she was near, Light felt calm and solaced. She didn't like to battle, but then again, that made him want to protect her all the more. He remembered the fierceness that he had seen when she battled Red. He wanted to make sure she never had to be like that again. He felt an urge to take away her worries and throw them all away somehow.

Cream was pretty attractive. She had long, flowing fur and a wonderfully large mane that shone as the sun struck it. And- Wait a second, where did these thoughts come from? Light thought. He had never considered how she had looked in with his thinking. But some voice in him made him start to consider this. It was true; she had a beautiful coat and a nice shape. She was slightly smaller than him, but he had found out that he was slightly small for an Umbreon, so they were close enough in height. Besides, he wouldn't want Cream to evolve. He liked her the way she was.

Well I guess that only reinforces my choice, he thought as the entered the Pokemon Center.