Thanks to my standard ladies: MeteorMuse for the beta job, sadtomato for always coming through on the WCs and gchats, and TippyL for being my slashy inspornation. ILY all.

I don't own Twilight. I also don't own anything witty to say about owning Hard this time.

Dude. Y'all have some Garrett HATE right now. Shame on you. You know that saying about not judging someone 'til you've walked a mile in their shoes? Yeah. Here goes with that … we pick up right where we left off.

ooOOoo

"Are you … are you buttoning up your pants? You've got to be kidding me. What's going on here?" Alice is the picture of confusion, but her voice is quiet, subdued even. Her face is pinched and pale, and you can see where she tried to wipe off smudges of black eye makeup.

Al, what's goin' on? Are you alright? I haven't heard from you in over a week. I was so worried, babe. Come here." Jasper draws Alice into a huge hug and gives me a look over her shoulder. The trouble is I can't decide if the look means 'get the hell out of here while she's distracted' or 'tell the girl what she needs to hear.' I stand there trying to figure out what to do while she starts weeping into his arm.

"It was awful, Jazz. You have no idea. First, PaPaw died, and we had to go to this godforsaken tiny little town over in Illinois where he and MaMaw met. And then, right in the middle of the wake, MaMaw had a heart attack. It was like something you'd see in a really depressing movie, I swear. So we had to cut things short for poor PaPaw's burial so we could all rush to the hospital to be with MaMaw." By this point, Alice is wailing, and Riley brings some tissues from their bathroom, but I'm frozen to the spot, jaw dropping toward the floor.

Shit. Their grandpa died? And their grandma had a heart attack? Jesus. Instead of trying to get a hold of Garrett to see if things were all right, I was feeling sorry for myself that he hadn't texted or called me. I'm such a dick.

"There was, like, zero cell reception where we ended up, and I just wanted to talk to you, you know? What a way to spend the break, right? I just can't imagine how hard her recovery is going to be. Grieving over her husband of sixty years and trying to recuperate enough to live on her own again is going to be so depressing. My mom is really worried about her, but I can't do much to help from all the way over here. I feel so helpless." And the wailing begins again.

"Alice? Alice, I'm so sorry. If there's anything I can do …" I place a hand on her tiny shoulder and squeeze affectionately, but she whirls on me with a glare.

"Maybe you should go see how Garrett's doing. You two looked pretty cozy before we left town." Alice looks from me to Riley to the bed, and I wonder just how much she saw.

"Yeah, I mean, I was worried about him. I texted or called him every day. More than once, Alice, I swear. Is he back? Can I call him?"

"Yeah. But is he going to want to hear from you? Are you gonna tell him what's been going on here? Or do I have to?"

And there it is. The moment of truth has finally been forced upon me. My eyes slide from Alice to Jasper, and he's glaring at me more fiercely than she is. What the fuck is his problem? He doesn't own me. All the pressure and tension and insecurity from the past two weeks explodes inside me, and I see red.

"What the fuck is that look for, Jasper? Seriously! You're the one that's been acting weird for weeks now. You don't own me, you know. I'm just an accessory to your relationship with Riley. You two love each other so much it's disgusting, and I'm just here for the fun parts. Right? Yeah, I like Garrett. We've been hanging out, and I like him, and I don't know what the fuck to do about this whole mess. But what the fuck do you care? Is it gonna mess with your little 'bring Edward around for movie theater blowjobs' plan? Huh?"

Alice is looking at me with wide eyes, and Riley seems shocked as well, but Jasper just chuckles at me, and the whole room goes silent for what seems like ages.

With a calm, steady voice, he finally speaks. "Edward, Edward, Edward. You know that I knew you were starting to fall for Garrett, right? I could tell two weeks ago. But, I assumed you were already secretly fucking around with him, and that's what wasn't cool with me. If you like the guy, and he likes you, I'm stoked. Both of you deserve what I have with Ri, but if you were messing with him while messing with us and keeping it a secret from both parties? That, my friend, is not cool. Not cool at all. I tried so many times to open the door for that conversation to happen, and you never said a word. The sweatshirt, asking what your break plans were, mentioning my close friendship with Alice … all of that was to see if you would tell us how you feel about G. And you never did.

"What the fuck, E? First of all, if you really like him, you wouldn't be doing what you're doing with us in the first place. He deserves more than that, and I'll be damned if I'm gonna play a role in his heart breaking. And secondly, no, I don't own you. But I do own enough of Riley to care about his health and my own, and if you're screwing around with other guys, we need to know. Now."

Well, fuck me. Seems I've been making wrong assumptions all over the place. They care about Garrett. They care about me. They think Garrett and I deserve what they have. A real relationship with some side helpings of exploratory group sex?

The thought is almost enough to make me hard, but all three of them are glaring at me at this point, and I'm starting to sweat. The way I see it, I have three options. I can stand here and argue with him, even though I don't have much ground to stand on. I can apologize humbly and explain myself. Or I can hightail it out of here, call Garrett as soon as I leave and save the humble apology for later.

My bruised ego wants to choose three, but my rational side makes me stay. They care about me after all. It's the least I can do. I swallow my pride, take a deep breath and begin speaking.

"Fuck, I'm an idiot. I don't even know where to start, Jazz. Umm. I guess first of all, I'm sorry. I assumed you had a clue about Garrett but that you were pissed that you were going to have to share me or lose me. God, I sound like such an egotistical bastard right now." I run my hands through my hair and sigh.

Alice has found her voice. "Wait. You've been quote 'an accessory to their relationship'? Like … a threesome? OMG. That's good. That's too good. Jazz, you never told me you were in to kinky shit." She's laughing, which is better than sobbing, but her laughter quickly fades and her eyes narrow. "But … hold on. I just saw you being straddled by my brother on his bed a few weeks ago. You better start explaining, Edward. I'm not afraid to kick your ass."

"I know, I know. It's not what you think. I mean, it kind of is what you think, but here's the thing. It was only that one time with Garrett, and things didn't go any further than that one kiss. Thank God you interrupted. My head was so confused, and I needed the week away to figure it all out. But then, I came back determined to see what could happen with him, but he never returned my calls or texts or anything, and these two kept hounding me to hang out like before and fuck ... I'm rambling."

"Dude. Chill out. So you like Garrett. It's cool, man. I'm totally down with you and G hooking up. As long as we know about it so we can step away from whatever it is that we've been doing with you. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love sucking your cock, but I don't want to mess anything up for you two. Well, I mean, maybe one day the four of us could get together and suck some cock, but if you guys are new and trying things out, you need to figure that out just the two of you. Know what I mean?" Okay, now it's my turn to be shocked. That's the longest speech I've ever heard Riley make. Ever. And it was sort of profound.

"Thanks Ri. Really. Thanks man." I turn to Alice. "Al, I'm leaving now, and I'm going to call Garrett. But I think it's best if I let him deal with any emotions he's got going on from the family stuff first, and then I can tell him about all this mess in person. Please give me a few days, okay?"

"One day, Edward. If you don't tell him by tomorrow night, I will. He deserves to know. And he might be more forgiving than you'd think. Just be honest. Please." Her eyes turn soft and pleading.

"Thanks. I'll … I'll try. I really do like him, Alice. Jazz … Riley … I'm not sure what to say. I really like what we've had … whatever it is. But I think I need to figure this out first. Like you said, Ri, I don't want to mess this up. Well. If I haven't already." I'm already backing out of their bedroom and rushing down the hall to the living room. As I grab Garrett's shirt off the arm of the couch and run out the door, I hear Jasper yell something like, "Go get your man, E!" and I grin.

As I get in my car, I dial. It rings three times, and I cringe, wondering if I'd just tried to call him two hours ago - before going to Jasper's - maybe I could have avoided this entire situation.

"Hello? Edward?"

"Garrett. God. You have no idea how good it is to hear your voice. I didn't know what was going on, and I was so confused, and I just … and Alice said your grandpa died, and I'm so, so sorry."

"Edward? Slow down. Why are you talking about Alice?"

Shit. Shit shit shit.

"Oh. Umm, I ran into her just now, and umm she said your grandpa died and that your grandma is in the hospital. I'm really sorry. Are you okay? Do you want company?"

"Oh. That's weird. I just dropped her off at her place a few minutes ago. Yeah, it sucks. Bad. I don't know; we had a long day. It's been a long week, actually. Maybe I can just go to bed, and we could see each other tomorrow? I'm not much company right now." He sounds so sad, my heart clenches in my chest.

"Sure. Whatever you need, Garrett. I mean that. I'll let you get some sleep. Can I call you tomorrow afternoon and maybe take you to dinner tomorrow night? Or we could order in. Your call." I'm already nervous about seeing him, but every part of my body longs to be next to him.

"That sounds perfect, E. And I got a flood of texts and voice mails from you as soon as we got back in cell range today. Thanks … it means a lot to know you didn't give up on me. G'night, Edward."

Fuck. "Good night, Garrett."

I head home and go straight to bed but toss and turn all night long. I've got a big hole to dig myself out of tomorrow.

ooOOoo

I pull on my mint green Lacoste and look in the mirror. Too gay? Fuck it. I'm gonna be late if I don't settle on something soon. I glance at the clock as I rub some wax through my hair. 6:52. Shit. I run toward the door, grabbing my wallet, keys, and phone on the way out. I'm supposed to pick up Garrett, and we have dinner reservations at CC's City Broiler at 7:00.

I speed through town, luckily hitting mostly green lights and pull in his driveway. Looking up, I grin when I realize he's already out the door and walking toward the car.

"Hey, I was going to come up and get you," I say, as he folds his long legs into the Volvo.

"It's okay. I was ready to get out of there. Sitting around all day moping doesn't do anyone any good." He looks over at me as he shuts the door, and I have the strong sudden urge to hold him. His eyes have dark rings under them, and his entire face just looks sad.

"I'm so sorry about the family stuff. I'm not good with, like, comforting people, but I care. I hope you know that." My voice is barely a whisper, and he reaches over the console to place his hand on my arm.

"I know. And I appreciate it. But let's just have fun tonight, okay? I need it."

I cringe. Fun sounds perfect. Too bad I'm going to have to ruin the fun with my sexual confessions later. "Sure thing. Let's go eat." I pull out of the driveway, and we make small talk on the way to the restaurant. Nothing too exciting and definitely nothing about his grandparents.

Once we're seated and Garrett has ordered a bottle of wine for us to share, I salivate over the menu. I must be actually moaning, because Garrett speaks up.

"What is it, E? You look like you're about to hump the menu."

"Oh my God. This place is the closest thing I've found to my favorite restaurant back home. They're actually the only place in town that has seafood come in fresh, not frozen." I can't decide. I want one of everything but finally settle on the stuffed salmon with a side of lobster mashed potatoes just before the waitress comes to take our order. I'm going to regret this if we go running on Sunday. That is, if he ever wants to see me again after tonight.

I fidget with my wine glass and glance around the restaurant while Garrett orders. As soon as the waitress leaves, he raises an eyebrow.

"You okay? You seem a little distracted. Not working on some ridiculous homework for your mom again, are you?" He grins, and I can't help but laugh.

"No. No homework right now. I'm free all night." I take a drink of wine, realizing that I sound like I just propositioned him, but he's already responding.

"Are you now? Well, maybe we can go to your place after dinner." I look up from the table, and he's staring at me rather pointedly. Crap.

"Yeah, maybe. See, the thing is, I needed to talk to you about something anyway. In private. So, that would be good." I try to make it seem serious but not bad serious, and he takes me the wrong way.

"Yes. Talking in private is much better than public. I agree." I feel something under the table and realize his foot is rubbing slowly up the side of my leg. Jesus. My dick is gonna be hard in two seconds if he keeps that up. I clear my throat.

"S-sure. I mean, this conversation should be private. Just you and me." I'm just making this worse, and I gulp down some more wine, then chug my water. I have to be sober for this. For sure.

We make it through our meal. It's delicious, but I have a hard time enjoying it between thinking about the things I'm about to say to Garrett and all the flirty innuendo he's throwing my way. At least his foot hasn't made it any higher than my kneecap. I'm hard enough without having his toes in my lap.

We ask for the check and argue over who's got it, but I win. I tell him I want to treat him after the shitty week he's had. And before the shitty things I'm about to say. I sign for my card, and we head toward my car. It feels like I'm walking to my death.

ooOOoo

We barely get to my front door before he starts in with the touching. His hand is at my hip while I put the key in the lock, and his front presses to my back as I push the door open. I turn to shut it as we enter the living room, and he reaches for my hand with his own.

"Garrett. Seriously. I think we need to talk." I move to the couch and perch on one end to create some distance, but he sits right next to me, thighs touching.

"I know we do. There's a lot to catch up on," he says. He puts one arm over the back of the couch behind me and leans in for a kiss. I try to look the other way so his lips only graze my cheek, but he instantly reaches his other hand to my chin and turns me to face him again.

"Edward. Come on. I need this." His eyes are searching my own, and I can't deny him.

I lean forward to meet him halfway, and our lips meet for the first time in weeks. It's exactly as I remembered. His lips are warm and soft, and I taste the remnants of wine as I open my mouth to his tongue. After only a few seconds, I'm lost in him like I was on his bed. Lost in us. He's perfect and everything I want, and I don't want to stop. Why was I thinking about stopping again? Fuck, he tastes good. He pulls away gently from where our tongues have entwined and places lazy, wet kisses along my jaw to my earlobe. Shit.

"Garr, wait. I think we need to stop." I half-heartedly push against his chest, but he persists with the kisses. As he moves lower to place them along my neck, he begins whispering.

"Edward, I thought about you so much while I was away. And the thing is - I want this. I want you. I don't know what the hell I was talking about with all that slow bullshit. I want to be with you … I just … I want to know what this could become." My brain is having an increasingly hard time focusing on his words, and my eyelids flutter closed as my head falls back against the couch.

"I don't … I think we should talk. Fuck, that feels amazing. But …" I'm at a loss for what to say as his hand has made it's way slowly down my chest and stomach to my hip. He squeezes lightly, still placing the kisses on my neck, before shifting us so that my back is against the armrest and he can lean into me more fully.

"Just stop thinking, E." He looks me in the eye before bringing his lips to my own for another kiss, but this one is different. This one is hard and full of want. This kiss says 'I'm pretty sure I want to fuck you', whereas the earlier ones all seemed to mean 'you're sweet, and I want to get to know you'. I groan as his tongue enters my mouth again and again, and his hand slides from my hip down to my thigh and inward. Oh, Jesus. The boy is going for my … yep, that's my dick. It's hard. And trapped in my jeans.

He strokes firmly a few times over the denim, and I find myself wishing he'd just free me from all the clothing and go for it. I try not to grind up against his hand, but he's moaning lightly and whispering things against my neck, and I can't help but hump it a little bit.

"Fuck, Edward, you feel so good. I can only imagine what we could do together. You could suck me off while I watch you stroke yourself. Or maybe I could suck you too. Or … fuck, I want to do so many things to you. You have no idea how it could be with me, baby." His hand has left my cock, and he has my polo pulled halfway up my chest before he says the next words.

"I want to be with you. Only you. Tonight." Annnnd, my hard on has disappeared. Not because of what he said. Shit. It's like, the perfect thing to hear a guy you like say. I lose my wood because of all that what he said implies. Only you. I want that too, but not before I've told him about my history. I know I have to do this, and I'll hate myself if I don't. Alice will hate me. And probably kick my ass.

So I take a deep breath, gently push him toward the other side of the couch and pray to God my balls don't legit turn blue.

"No," I say firmly. "We have to talk first, G. I'm sorry, but we do."

He looks hurt, and I know it's just going to get worse from here on out, so I rack my brain for ways to soften the blow.

"Here's the thing. I really like you. Like, I really, really like you." I pause to make sure that part sinks in, and Garrett agrees with me a little too whole-heartedly.

"I like you too, babe. That's why I was so glad to come back. So glad you were still hoping to hear from me. I know this is all new, but I don't know ... I just have a feeling about us. Know what I mean?"

"Umm, yeah. I know what you mean. I like you a lot, and I was worried about you when I couldn't get in touch with you. But see, the thing is, I was sort of seeing someone when we met."

"Oh. Oooookay." He swallows hard before meeting my eyes with his own. "Just when was the last time you saw this guy?"

"Well, it's not a guy, per se." Garrett raises his eyebrows at me, and I have to rush to clarify. "No! It's not a girl. I mean, gross. It's, well, it's two. Guys! Two guys." Fuck me.

He looks at me, silently asking me to continue, and I do. "I was sort of seeing two guys when I met you. But I really liked you after we had hung out some, and I wanted to see where it went. But then we had Thanksgiving break, and I wasn't sure where we stood. And there was that phone call … which was sort of … weird?" I look at him questioningly, but I know that phone call should be the furthest thing from this conversation right now.

"Oh. That? I was picturing you stretched out on your old bed, and it turned me on, so I relieved a little stress. No big deal. Anyway, you were saying? Two guys?" So he's not in the mood to discuss phone sex. Duly noted.

"Well, I came back from Chicago determined to see what was going to happen with you, but I never heard from you, and I felt like you were blowing me off. Anyway, these guys kept calling me, and I have little to no willpower. I may be gay, but I'm a guy, you know? So finally, last night," I look at him guiltily when I say that part, "last night, I went over to their place."

His eyebrows shoot up so fast, I think they might fly off his forehead, so I blurt out quickly, "But nothing really happened! I mean, there was some kissing and some over the clothes touching and, fuck, okay, there was the beginning portion of a blow job, but we stopped! I swear."

Okay. His head is probably going to shoot off his body. He's holding his breath, and his face is getting all red. He might need to see a doctor if he doesn't calm down. Shit.

"Garrett? Please say something. I'm an asshole, I know. Lay it on me."

"Let me get this straight. You were kind of, sort of seeing two guys when we met." His voice is calm and even, barely above a whisper, and he's staring at the floor.

"Yes. Well, I mean, not so much seeing them as messing around with them. Fuck, that probably didn't help. Sorry." I cringe.

"And you tried to stop seeing them. But then, I didn't call you because I was at my grandpa's funeral, so you gave in and went to see them. Them. As in both of them? At the same time? As in three of you total? Jesus, Edward. What the fuck?"

"Yes. It's not as bad as it sounds, I promise you. They like you a lot, and now that Alice told them we're sort of dating, they really want me to step back from them and focus on you. They said that. Just last night."

"Now that Alice told who what?" His face is really red now. I've made the boy mad. Shit.

"G, calm down. Please, babe. Let's talk about all this."

"No Edward. I'll talk. You listen. I can't fucking believe you were off having threesomes while you were pretending to be into me. Did you even stop to consider my feelings at all? And what the fuck does Alice have to do with all this?"

I'm silent for a moment before I realize he's waiting for a response. "Oh. Shit. You said listen, so I was listening. Umm, yes I definitely considered your feelings. I was consumed with guilt the last few weeks, and then last night was like torture when Alice explained why you guys had been out of cell range. I hate myself right now. Please believe me, G. Please. I want to be with you too. Only you." I'm pleading with him, begging him with my eyes not to leave, but he returns my gaze with a hardened stare.

After a deep breath, he finally talks. "So Alice knows them. There's only one place you could have been ... have you been fucking Jasper and Riley, E? Fuck. That's … that's just … fuck."

His eyes go wild - almost crazy - and he looks me up and down before jumping up from the couch. For a moment, I'm not sure if he's going to punch me or kiss me, but instead he walks to the door and jerks it open. I come to my senses enough to jump off the couch and grab at his arm before he can leave.

"Garrett, wait. Please, just let me explain. I want to be with you, G. You."

He snorts and jerks his arm from my grasp. "What, your heart belongs to me but your cock belongs to those two? I don't operate that way. Never have, Edward. Goodbye. Don't follow me." I watch as he turns and runs down my front steps and across the street.

"Garrett, wait!" I call out desperately, but he doesn't even glance over his shoulder.

Fuck.

I slowly close the front door, turn around and lean against it, sliding to the floor. The clock on the cable box flashes at me, searing this moment into my memory. 11:23 p.m. The first time I've cried in years.

ooOOoo

So. What do you think? Was G too harsh? Is E too stupid? Will there be a foursome in the future? I know I said there would be some smut here, but there wasn't much. And the angst is MINIMAL. Please stick with me. I love you all. ;)

Eurofornication contest winners were announced on the 15th. Congrats to allryans for winning Judges' Choice with Spanish Moss and to Prassacut for winning Popular Vote with Eat, Laugh, Fuck. If you didn't get a chance to read the entries, you should really head over there and check out some great slashy one-shots!

I've decided to also post Hard on TwiWrite, just in case FFn becomes even more faily. You can find it here: http: / www. twiwrite. net/ viewstory. php? sid=604 (remove all the spaces)