Chapter 8

The noise that broke the peace of the mountains surrounding the cabin was almost unbearable. It had started out as a loud clanking and rumbling sound in the distance a week earlier and slowly grew to a low roar. Clara had been surprised by how much noise four pieces of heavy machinery could make.

She had grown used to the silence of the mountains and this ruckus was almost deafening to listen to. The only reason she even put up with it at all was because the road leading past her cabin and further up into the mountains was finally getting repaired. The dust that was kicked up from the machines was bad enough but the added noise it made unnerved her enough that she fled along with most of the animals in the area until the crew had moved on and the road was finally finished. She spent several days with Jesse and Cody, helping them with chores around their own cabin and letting Jesse teach her more about what was needed to survive at this high of an elevation.

Upon returning to her home, she found everything coated in a thin layer of powdered dirt and fine grit from the gravel dumped onto the road. Looking around, she couldn't imagine how much worse it would have been if she'd been living right off the road. As it was, she was about a quarter of a mile off of it and it was thick enough she could write her name in every surface within the cabin and on the outside of every window.

She spent several days on her own, cleaning out the cabin now that the roof was finally finished with shingles and looked like it had been sealed well since the rain from the week before hadn't caused anything to leak through. The interior had a few minor repairs that still needed to be attended to but they were nothing that a little time and care couldn't handle. The only major thing left was the ceiling. Jesse had secured her drywall and insulation but she wondered how she was going to get it up the mountain without any form of transportation.

Not wishing to manipulate Jesse or Cody's time, Clara kept to herself somewhat, cleaning up around the outside of the cabin and inside the barn. She began assessing the few things she found inside the old structure but it was what she didn't find that made her worry about her future comfort at the cabin. There was nothing in the barn or cabin that could even be called furniture. Clara ate her meals on a campstool in the kitchen and when she slept at the cabin and not at Jesse's, it was on a second hand camp cot she'd purchased along with the few other supplies she'd managed to acquire since coming here. She knew though that it wouldn't be enough for her to deal with the coming winter in any comfort. She could make it work if she had to but she'd prefer not to be sitting or laying so close to the floor during the cold winter months.

On the second day of her barn cleaning adventure, the sound of a truck coming down the road towards the cabin brought her to the hayloft door. A black Ford pickup truck that she didn't recognize pulled up to the front of her cabin. The man that climbed out of the cab, however, was familiar indeed. Blonde hair topped a tall lanky frame that had a casual grace about it. The man it belonged to looked around as she watched him and then his green eyes looked up to see her standing in the hayloft door. He was dressed in a worn gray sweatshirt and old faded blue jeans, obviously not in his Ranger uniform, which she thought was a pity.

"Hey…," he called up to her, putting a hand over his brow to shade his eyes slightly so to get a better look up at her.

"Something I can do for you Commander Hawkes?" she asked, trying to sound casual while her mind whirled in nervous circles. Why was he here? She'd been in the mountains two months and she hadn't seen him once since that first meeting. She suddenly felt confused perhaps even a touch angry by his sudden intrusion into her little world.

"It's Matt. I'm off duty. And for starters, perhaps you could come down here and help me unload this drywall and insulation I hauled up here for you," he said, a touch of annoyance in his voice at her 'formal' address to him.

With a raised eyebrow, she looked down at him from her superior position for another moment then disappeared from view. As she made her way down out of the loft she tried to calm her jumbled up emotions. It wouldn't do to have him see her unnerved by his presence. Once she felt a little more in control of herself, she came out of the barn to stand on the other side of his truck, looking under the tarp to see all that it covered. "You didn't have to do this. I would have gotten it hauled up here when I had the chance…," she stated, trying to be casual about it. She didn't like the fact that she felt indebted to him for doing her a favor.

He raised an eyebrow, "According to Cody, you don't have a truck anymore. When he came to see me a few weeks ago, he 'strongly' suggested I stop by and pick this stuff up from the hardware store." Matt stood on the other side of the bed of the truck, looking her over. She looked a bit rumpled this morning, dusty from cleaning out the barn and had a piece of old straw stuck out of the neck of her shirt. The pictures Cody had taken though didn't really do her justice. The difference between the first time he'd seen her two months ago and now was a stark contrast. She looked much healthier, perhaps…happier.

There was a slight sigh of resignation, "Is this what it feels like to have a 'little brother'?" she asked him, looking up at him with a slight spark of amusement in her eyes.

"You've just now figured out that Cody's sort of adopted you? Little slow on the uptake there aren't you?" he teased lightly.

There was a look of rye amusement on her face as she brushed off the front of her shirt and pants with her gloved hands as if just realizing that she must have been covered in dirt from her cleaning. She still missed the piece of hay in her neckline. "Guess I'm just not used to someone else looking out for me is all…"

Matt shrugged a little, "Listen. It's my day off and I figured I could help you get started on putting this stuff up. Do you know how to hang drywall or caulk the joints or anything?" he asked casually, trying not to sound superior. He was pretty sure her answer would be 'no'.

There was a slight flush to her face, the heat of embarrassment rising up her neck. "No," was all she could manage to say.

He nodded, "Come on. I'll show you. It's not hard, just takes a careful hand and usually takes two people to hold and secure the drywall into place." With that, he moved to the back of the truck as he pulled on a pair of leather gloves he'd tugged from his back pocket. He dropped the tailgate and pulled a couple of rolls of insulation out. "Don't touch this stuff without gloves…," was all he said as he handed her the first roll.

Lying on her back on the top of the porch steps, Clara looked through the front door and up at the ceiling of the cabin. Matt sat next to her, sipping at a glass of water and was leaning back on one elbow.

"Not bad for a day's work," he stated, looking over at her out of the corner of his eye.

She shrugged with a slight smile on her lips. "True. But the next time you drop a box of screws on the floor, I'm going to make you be the one to go around and pick them up…"

Matt raised an eyebrow, "Hey, I was the one holding the piece of drywall up. If you want to do that while I pick up the screws, be my guest," he shot back. He wasn't willing to admit that though it had been an accident, he'd enjoyed the 'view' from the top of the scaffolding as he 'worked' to hold the drywall in place until she could get enough screws gathered up so they could continue working.

She gave a rather unladylike snort but didn't say anything else.

Matt stared out at the trees surrounding the cabin and listened to the wind whispering through them. His mind was full of questions to ask her about her past. They'd talked on and off during the day about his time growing up, going to school and how he became a Ranger. During those discussions, she'd never offered any information about herself. In his experience, most people usually offered up some example of their own lives when you talked about the past like that. She hadn't and it made him even more curious.

"So Clara, what happened to you after you left here that last summer you spent with Jake?" he asked finally. His words were met with silence but he'd seen her body tense out of the corner of his eye. Turning his head to look at her, she was still staring up at the ceiling inside but gone was the relaxed state she'd been in earlier.

"Life…happened I guess. I was a kid growing up in a big city. Mom and dad didn't think I needed to go up and see Jake any more…that I didn't have time with all my other activities they had me doing. I begged them to let me come back but when you're a kid, I guess it doesn't really matter what 'you' want. Parents think they know what's best." Her words sounded bitter, even to her own ears. "I was forced to grow up too quickly. They wanted a perfect miniature replica of themselves to fit their perfect life at the time."

Matt watched as she shifted and sat up, her face turned away from him somewhat. "But once you graduated from high school, then what?"

Her blue eyes turned to look at him with a look that reminded him of an angry, trapped animal. She got up off the porch and walked away from him, stuffing her hands in her jean pockets. "Look, I don't want to talk about it Matt. It's in my past and I want to forget about it, ok? So please, don't ask me about it." She looked back at the cabin. "I think I've got the basics of caulking and finishing things. I really appreciated you bringing everything up here today and helping me out. It was a big help."

Matt stood up, watching her walk a ways off. He knew a dismissal when he heard one. He ground his teeth a little in frustration. She'd shut down on him over a few simple questions. He had only wanted answers and instead he got vague comments and then told not to ask about it. What was she hiding? What had happened to her in the last fifteen years to make her not want to talk about any of it? His mind tried to come up with a list of things that were common things such as sexual abuse or worse but he'd seen how she was normally when not cornered and she didn't show any of the signs or symptoms that were usually present in someone who had been abused in some form or fashion for an extended period of time. Granted, each case was different but the indicators they were taught to look for weren't there other than her avoidance to talk about things.

Sighing, he walked down the steps of the porch and headed to his truck. Before he opened his truck door, he turned to look at her. "Look, I'm sorry Clara. I was just curious, that's all. I'm off in the afternoon the day after tomorrow. I can come up and help you finish if you'd like," he offered.

Clara looked over at him, "Actually I'm supposed to be at your dads getting my first lesson in how to cut wood. Guess I have a lot of catching up to do this year to get ready for winter," she said, frowning slightly.

Matt raised an eyebrow, "I'd say 'Good Luck' but I know my dad all too well…so I guess I can only offer my condolences now."

She snorted, a touch of a smile on her lips as she turned to watch him leave. Matt smirked and opened his truck door, sliding in. He decided it was time to leave before he upset her again since he was hoping to he'd be allowed to come back again…soon.