A/N: Happy second-to-last Once day! :( Here's some SQ fluff (and important conversations) to hold you over until the show tonight. We're way ahead in the timeline now, but I'm not worrying about calendar dates in the fic aligning with calendar dates IRL anymore, because I don't want to keep you all waiting months between updates and I want to keep the story moving.
I hope you enjoy!
Wednesday, July 25, 8:15pm
"This is so bizarre," Regina commented as she flipped through the giant binder on the coffee table that was filled with the biographies of potential sperm donors she had printed out from the online database. "This is the weirdest window shopping experience I've ever had, and I can't even see what they look like. How do I know that what they say on here is even true?"
"I'm sure they vet them, Regina," Emma said as she sat down on the couch with her glass of red wine. Regina was sitting on the floor in front of her with a confused look on her face as she read another man's biography. Emma peered over her girlfriend's shoulder to see who the potential candidate was. "That guy claims to be an astrophysicist, so I'm sure they verified it before they let women think they're going to be carrying around a rocket scientist's baby."
"Probably. But still, how am I supposed to pick one? How do women do this?"
Emma shrugged. "You're asking the wrong person. This is like online dating, which I refused to ever participate in, but a hundred times more awkward."
"Not to mention this is a lifetime commitment," Regina mumbled under her breath.
Emma rolled her eyes and continued. "Just go with your gut."
Regina sighed and closed the thick binder with a thud, pushing it away from her on the table in frustration. "Maybe this is just a crazy idea. It feels weird to think about growing some stranger's baby in my uterus."
"Regina, it's your baby. The donor is just providing a needed ingredient."
"I know, but still. I really want to be pregnant, but this just feels too bizarre to me. Maybe this isn't the right path for me," she replied, despondent.
"So, are you thinking about adoption, then?"
"Maybe…But I'm not quite there yet. I still really want to have the experience of being pregnant and giving birth. I do want to adopt some day, but after I've done the pregnancy thing, since I only have a short window left for that."
"Then what about using someone you know?" Emma asked.
"Wouldn't that be even more strange than using a donor? Seeing the baby's father on a regular basis and knowing that he's the one who helped to create my child? That would be super awkward for him and for me."
"He's only the father if you treat him that way. Obviously, we'd have to talk to him and make sure he understands his lack of involvement, that he's just providing the required genetic material."
Regina's eyes widened. "You just said 'we'."
"What?"
"You said 'we.'…as in 'we'd have to talk to him', not that 'I'd have to talk to him'."
"Oh," Emma frowned, replaying her own words in her head. "Did I really?"
"Uh huh," Regina smirked, doing her best not to get her hopes up.
"Huh," Emma shrugged. "Anyway," she continued, not addressing it more than that. She hadn't caught her Freudian slip, and she wasn't really sure what it meant herself. She preferred to gloss over it for the time being. "What about Robin?"
"You're kidding, right? Please tell me you're kidding."
"Why would I be kidding? You guys are good friends, he knows how much you love kids, and that way the baby would be a half-sibling of Henry and Roland."
"Well for one, I don't know if Gwen would agree to it, especially since she can't have any more kids after the complication she had during Jessie's birth. I don't think she'd want him impregnating his ex-wife, even though she knows the truth about our relationship."
"I don't think she would have a problem with it, but ultimately it's his sperm, not hers. It should be his call, and I think he would want to do it."
"Okay, but then there's the fact that he had a vasectomy."
"Yeah, tell that to Gwen and her four-month old."
Regina laughed. "Okay fair, but I think that was probably an extremely unlikely event. My gyno said the guy needs to be super fertile with great motility and all of that to improve the chances that it would take, and given how expensive this is, I want to make sure I'm using strong swimmers. I don't think Robin would meet that requirement, even if he wanted to."
"Well, he's clearly capable of producing sperm, as little Jessie proves. And he's probably super fertile, if he managed to get Gwen pregnant with only a few actually getting through the barrier, or whatever it is a vasectomy does to him internally. Maybe there's some medical way they can extract sperm from him, if he can't produce it in a cup like the rest of the donors."
Regina scrunched her face, but shrugged. "Maybe. And you might be right…it would make sense to use someone we know. That way we can be sure of their medical history, and not just what they write on these forms."
"If you don't want to use Robin, there's always Killian," Emma offered, taking another sip of her wine. "You two would produce good-looking kids."
"He's cute, and he's talented, but I don't know him that well. I don't know if I'd be comfortable asking him for that."
Emma chuckled. "Well, I could ask him for you, but yeah…maybe I'll save Killian for myself."
Regina raised a brow as she opened the donor binder again, picking up where she left off and still not liking any of the options. "Planning a bit ahead, are we?"
The blonde shrugged. "I don't want to be pregnant anytime soon since I still have a few viable years professional dancing ahead of me and I don't want to take time off if I can avoid it, but I'm not writing it off. The more I think about it, the more I think it might be nice…one day."
"Hmm…" Regina hummed, looking back at the binder.
"What?"
"I was just thinking… nevermind."
"No, Regina, what is it?"
The brunette turned around, resting her back against the edge of the coffee table as she looked up at girlfriend. "Promise me you won't freak out at what I'm going to say."
"Okay, I promise…" Emma replied, narrowing her eyes in question.
"It's just…if you think you want to be pregnant one day, and if we're thinking that we'll still be together at that time, which I hope is what we're both thinking, then should we plan to use the same donor so our kids are biologically half-siblings? That might be the closest thing we have to creating children together."
"Oh…I hadn't thought of that, but it makes sense. Though biology isn't everything."
"I know," Regina smiled, thinking about Roland and Henry. She couldn't love them more than she already did, even if she had been the one to give birth to them. "But you even suggested Robin so that the baby would have the boys as brothers. And I like the idea of that connection, even if it's purely genetic. I like that idea for us, too, potentially."
"So you want to see if Robin can scrounge together enough sperm for not only for you, but for me, too?" Emma laughed. "God, just when I thought our family dynamics couldn't get any more insane."
"You're right. Forget it."
Emma laughed. "No, Regina, I'm not saying 'no.' I'm just saying that would be extremely complicated. And Robin's your best friend. I really like the guy, but I don't know him like you do. Not to mention, I still bartend at his restaurant. It would be weird to have my boss' baby."
"Well, you probably won't still be moonlighting there in however many years we're talking down the line, so you'd know him better by then. And you said so yourself — he wouldn't be the baby's 'dad' in any non-genetic way."
"Maybe," Emma sighed, but then a smirk crossed her face.
"What?" Regina deadpanned, nervous for whatever was going on in Emma's head. She had learned to be cautious of that look.
"Maybe genetics are important for the babies, but not in terms of blood relation to each other."
"What are you talking about?" Regina asked, thoroughly confused.
"We can use both."
"You've completely lost me. Both what?"
"You could use Robin, and I'd use Killian," Emma suggested.
Regina said nothing and waited for Emma to explain whatever she was thinking. She was still not sure where her girlfriend was going with that line of thinking.
Emma rolled her eyes as she explained her thoughts. "We don't need to use the same donor, but we could use someone who resembles the other person. Robin is a blonde with light eyes, like me. Killian is a brunette with striking features, like you. Maybe with those pairings, the kids might end up looking like they could be both of ours, even without any genetic connection to each other. If I used Robin, yeah the kid would be related to Henry, Roland, and your hypothetical baby, but with Robin and me both being pale blondes, he or she wouldn't look at all like the other kids or like you. But if you throw Killian's gene pool in the mix with mine, and Robin's with yours…"
Realization dawned across Regina's face. "Oh…I see what you mean," she smiled as she considered it. "I like that idea. Plus, that way we would each get to use our own BroTP."
"Wait, did you really just say 'BroTP'?"
"I've learned a lot of fangirl slang over the years from fans of the show."
"Clearly."
"But Emma, in all seriousness, I have to ask…if you're even suggesting this as a possibility, does that mean your thoughts have changed since the last time we talked?" Regina asked hesitantly. Emma had been cautiously supportive of Regina's exploration of the process since returning from the New England convention, and she had even gone with Regina to one of the doctor's appointments to get the results of Regina's fertility tests. But, she hadn't given any indication that she had changed her mind about wanting to be a mother to Regina's child. As far as Regina knew, she was still on her own in terms of parenting the potential baby, at least for the first few years until Emma was ready to take on that role. "If you want the hypothetical baby I'm planning to have in the next year or so to look like you, does that mean you want to be involved as more than just the baby's mother's girlfriend? Do you want to have this baby with me?"
Emma swallowed audibly as she thought it over. After what felt like an eternity of awkward silence, she spoke. "Maybe? I'm still not completely sure, but then I assume that most first-time parents are never completely sure at first, either. I'm still utterly terrified and worried that we're not ready for this big of a step, but I have to admit, I am getting a little excited about the idea."
A smile broke out on Regina's face, and she could feel tears pooling behind her eyes. "Really?"
"Really," Emma smiled. "I love you, Regina, and I know it's not going to be easy on either of us or on our relationship, but if I'm going to be there anyway, and I do want to be there, then I think I want to be all in."
Regina released a breath. "Holy shit. So, we're going to do this?"
"It looks like it."
Regina rushed to push herself off the ground and onto her knees in front of the couch, resting one hand on Emma's thigh and the other on her cheek as she fiercely kissed the blonde. "I love you. So much."
"I love you, too," Emma smiled when they parted. "But before you get too excited and start planning baby showers and picking out colors for the nursery, you need to talk to Robin and ask him for some precious genetic material and make sure it's viable. Have fun with that," she winked as she stood up and patted Regina on the top of the head, then going to the kitchen to grab another bottle of wine.
"Shit," Regina said, realizing that she did indeed need to take that critical step first. "Pour me a glass while you're in there, please?"
"You better enjoy this now while you still can," she replied, handing her a glass of merlot with a smirk. "Can't have this when you're knocked up."
"Don't be smug…Just remember, you'll need to have this conversation with Killian eventually."
"Eh, no biggie. I'll buy him a bottle of rum and send him a Playboy and a plastic cup and it'll be done in less than five minutes."
"I hate you."
A/N: I'm guessing some of you saw this coming, but hopefully not everyone , I want to make this clear, because I know it can be a sensitive subject: I'm not bashing women who choose to use anonymous donors (I know a lot of people who have used anonymous donors and prefer that route over using a friend. I also know a few who have chosen a friend over using an anonymous donor. It's a matter of personal preference, and one is not better than the other). In the canon of this story, though, it's not something Regina is all the comfortable with (there will be more explanation about that in the next chapter), and because of their strong platonic friendship, I had intended for Robin to be a possible donor for Regina [if he's fertile enough, that is], if Regina and Emma decide to use a sperm donor. But, there are still a lot of things that would need to fall into place for that to even be a possibility.
The next chapter is already written, so my plan is to post it next Friday right before the finale, or on Saturday right after. In the next chapter, Robin will make a quick appearance as he's asked for a very important favor, and we also find out the final results of the dance contest :)
EDIT: I'll post more in the opening A/N of the next chapter about this, but I did want to quickly clarify that even though our favorite ladies are talking about using Robin and/or Killian as a donor, it doesn't mean that will actually happen. There have been some strong mixed feelings in the first few hours of this being posted, and I totally understand and respect that (and I'm glad that this provoked strong feelings for readers, even though some of them weren't great feelings). But, please know that regardless of if they have a baby and who the biological father of that baby is, Emma and Regina are endgame, and there's no chance of any hetero-romance coming into play ever in their future. So, I hope you'll hang on for the rest of the ride, or at least until the final decision as to how the women will become mothers together is decided. Just because they chatted about it here doesn't mean that it will definitely happen this way. :)
