Chapter 26

The sound of beeping machines seemed to echo through her mind as she floated in a fog of weightlessness. She should be scared…maybe. She had been hit in the face twice with a gun then shot. Was this the in-between of heaven or something? She felt no fear, felt no anger, no resentment. She just…was.

She became aware of a terrible taste in her mouth then how dry her tongue was and thought how nice it would be to have a cold drink of water. As she went to move her tongue, something seemed to be holding it down. She'd have to explore that in a moment but another sensation and thought invaded her senses. Why was her chest hurting? She was in heaven wasn't she? Her chest shouldn't hurt, should it? And why was this thing in her mouth, keeping her from swallowing? She wanted a drink and she couldn't get one if she had this thing in her mouth. Maybe she was in hell and this was some form of torture.

Raising a hand that felt like a lead weight was attached to it, she began to explore what was in her mouth. She felt something tugging at her finger and then it was gone. Her ears were suddenly assailed by a high pitched noise and she winced away from it, only to feel her face awaken with agony and pain. As she tried to move away from the offending noise, she felt a searing agony race across her left shoulder and into her lung, causing her to inhale sharply. That was when she felt that whatever was in her mouth was now in her throat and she began to panic, the sensation arising as if she were gagging. Struggling now in a panic, she tried to remove what was in her mouth.

Cold hands took a hold of hers and she felt them pulling hers away from her face. She tried to breath but her chest hurt, her lungs hurt, this thing in her throat hurt and her whole body was screaming out in pain. Then the fog began to cloud her mind again, she felt the pain beginning to slide away from her body as she floated back down into that blessed darkness as her body felt heavy again. She felt the fog thicken further and she really didn't care about anything at the moment. All those other thoughts and problems, they could wait until later…

Waiting was the hardest part. Actually Matt thought at this moment it was pure torture of the heart and soul. He got up out of his chair next to Clara's bed and stretched a little. He needed coffee and the chair he had been sitting in on and off for over six hours had given him a crink in his neck. Walking out of the room and down the hallway to the waiting room, he knew it wouldn't be too much longer before Jesse came to relieve him for a shift while Matt went to go get some sleep and take care of business at the office.

Matt truly wanted to do nothing more than sit and wait for Clara to wake up but the doctors didn't know when that might be. Unfortunately, work at the station didn't stop and he had to do his part to keep the place running smoothly. The doctors didn't seem worried that it had been two days now and still no sign of her trying to breathe on her own. They simply said that these things 'take time' and just to be patient. He ground his teeth. His patience was wearing very thin at this point. Matt found fresh coffee had been made and he poured himself a cup as he rolled his head and shoulders, trying to get the ache out of his neck.

He had left the hospital upon his fathers' insistence the morning that they had taken Clara into surgery. He was gone longer than he would have liked to have been due to his meeting with Sheriff McBride and returning a call to Lisa in LA. When he'd finally gotten back to the hospital they were into their fifth hour of surgery with the pulmonary specialist and there had been no updates.

By six o'clock that night, an exhausted looking surgeon had come out to tell them the good news. Clara had survived the surgery and he was confident they had managed to get all of the offending material out of her lung tissue. Now, it was only a matter of letting her heal though he warned them that they had to intubate her because she was too weak at the moment to breathe on her own. With assurances that this was only temporary until she'd regained some of her strength and was able to handle that simple task on her own, it was there to make sure she got plenty of oxygen to her damaged lung.

The nursing staff had finally allowed them to see her one at a time after they'd moved her to ICU a few hours later. Matt had been shocked when he'd entered the room, being the first of them to see her since she'd disappeared into the ER. Her cheeks were swollen and both of her eyes were black from the bruising underneath them. That alone made his blood boil with anger towards the man who could have taken such a thing of beauty and tried to ruin it as he had.

But the marks on her face were heightened by how pale she looked under the tan she'd gotten over the summer and it was only made worse by the stark white of the hospital sheets. She looked diminished somehow next to all of the machines she was hooked up to. For a woman who had been on the go every time he'd seen her, to see her laying there so still and lifeless, shook him to the core.

He'd gone over and taken her right hand, running a thumb over the back of her fingers since an IV was stuck into the back of her hand. He leaned down and whispered softly into her ear, "I'm sorry Clara. You have to get better so I can have the chance to tell you that." He leaned down, kissing her forehead gently before he'd left, giving his dad and brother time to visit with her.

After convincing the hospital staff that it was in the best interest and safety of Clara at this time to keep an unofficial guard on her, they had moved a chair into the room for whoever was on duty to watch over her. The Rangers, along with Jesse and Cody, had set up a schedule to take shifts during their off hours to watch over her until Mike was able to do organize protection for her in an official capacity. A deputy sheriff had come by the following morning to take fingerprints of Clara to verify that she had been the one to write the message in the journal as they continued to process everything that they'd found up at the cabin.

Details had been kept from the press but it would only be a matter of time before an arrest warrant was issued for Randall. When he was finally served with the warrant that was when the shit would hit the fan. Lisa Elliot was already preparing a statement about the lawsuit against Clara's manager and her parents. Sheriff McBride in turn was preparing one about the attack on Shandra Lee's life and had been warned by Lisa that once the press found out where Shandra Lee was, he would need to have a plan in place to keep them out of the hospital and away from Clara until she was released.

As Matt slowly made his way back to Clara's room, his thoughts were interrupted by the sound of several pairs of feet rushing down the hall towards ICU as the sound of a heart monitor flat lining brought him to attention. His heart began to race in mild panic as he hurried his steps to get a better look at what was going on and saw several nurses disappear into Clara's room. A doctor rushed in followed by another nurse and Matt held his breath as he made his way towards the window that looked in at her bed.

Matt's heart was hammering so hard that he couldn't hear anything but its drumming beat within his ears and he vaguely realized if he didn't breath soon he'd pass out on the floor. Sucking in a breath of air he focused on the activity within the room. He feared he'd see Clara lying there limply as doctors and nurses tried to revive her. What he didn't expect to see was Clara fighting to get the ventilator out of her throat. Her eyes were still closed as if she was trapped in a nightmare but she was far from dead. He watched as the nurses pulled her hands away from her face and injected something into her IV. It only took moments to work and she soon calmed then quickly relaxed back into sleep. The nurses hurried to hook up her heart monitor again and he exhaled in a gust to hear it beating strongly, realizing he'd been holding it in fear that she'd been dead.

He watched as they carefully began prepping her to take out the ventilator and make her more comfortable as they checked her wounds, her IV's and everything else hooked up to her. Within twenty minutes things were quiet again on the floor and Clara was sleeping soundly with a bit more color to her features. Matt had moved back into the room now that the doctors and nurses had moved out. He could only stand at her bedside and marvel at the tenacity of her spirit as a quiet smile spread across his face. She was still fighting.

She woke slowly for the second time, her eyes opening with difficulty as though her eyelashes had been glued together. She roughly remembered a bad dream of choking on something but whatever it had been, it was gone now. The room was dimly lit and she was thankful for it since her eyes hurt as she worked to focus them. Well, in fact, her whole body hurt. Her chest still hurt, right in the center over her sternum, not to mention the throbbing ache from the back of her left shoulder. She reached up a hand absently to rub at the sore spot and noticed the IV stuck in the back of her hand.

Shuddering, she put it back down. She hated needles. Looking around a little more, she realized she was in a hospital room. It was obvious by the sterile décor and lack of anything but equipment around the bed that was monitoring her. Clara turned her head stiffly to look around and winced as that simple act seemed to send a burning sensation to grip her left lung. It caught her off guard and she shut her eyes for a moment as she waited for the sensation to ease.

When it did, she opened her eyes and saw a tall figure who seemed familiar, standing with his back to her outside the door. As he shifted, she saw the blonde hair in the hallway light, the stubborn set of his shoulders and it made her heart beat just a little faster. Of course anyone dressed in blue jeans, hiking boots and a black leather jacket with a figure like that would make her heart skip a beat but she knew who it was as if drawn to him like a lode stone. He was obviously talking to someone she couldn't see as he gestured with his hand and nodded several times though nothing he said penetrated the quiet of her room.

She wanted to call to him but as she swallowed, she knew her throat was too dry. Frustrated for the moment, she just laid there and took in the sight of him. She stared at his back, willing him to turn around and look in her direction. Not giving up, she slowly looked around a little more, trying to ignore that burning sensation that was becoming more persistent in her chest. She knew these places were supposed to have call buttons but she couldn't find one that she could see and as her heart rate increased, so did her breathing. The pain from the center of her chest and left shoulder seemed to be spreading to encircle her lung and squeeze down on it, making it almost impossible to breath.

Finally a whimpered sob escaped her dry throat as she tried to shift to ease the pain, only to encounter more of the same. But for once luck was with her and that slight noise was enough for Matt to notice. He tensed and turned to look into the room, his eyes immediately coming into contact with hers. As if by some unspoken communication, he turned his head and said something to someone out in the hallway and then stepped to the side of the doorway as a nurse came bustling into her room.

The matronly woman quickly moved to her bedside and began to ask her questions about how she felt and her comfort level. Matt moved silently into the room to stand just out of the nurses' way but close enough that she could still see him as she tried to answer the questions. Finally she looked at the nurse, "It hurts…here," pointing to the left side of her chest. "And I'm thirsty," she said in a dry raspy voice.

The nurse gave her a look and frowned slightly, "I'll check with the doctor to see if I can give you something for the pain." Before she left though, she ducked into the bathroom and came out with a glass of water, put a straw in it then handed it to Matt. "Don't let her drink this too quickly." With 'orders' given and after a final check of all of the machines the nurse turned and left to get an answer about providing some relief for Clara.

Once the nurse was gone, Matt moved Clara's bedside and got the straw to her lips. She managed to take a slow drink, then several little sips, desperately trying to rehydrate the inside of her mouth. Finally she felt she'd had enough and tilted her head away just enough to signal she was done. Matt put the cup on the bedside table and rested his hands on the bed railing, his eyes full of concern.

As he did, she saw his leather jacket open somewhat and noticed the gun in the shoulder holster underneath it. She looked at it and then her blue eyes looked up into his green ones with the unspoken question as to why he was wearing it in her hospital room.

"You've been out of it for three days. Sheriff McBride was hoping you'd wake up before now so he could get the full story from you but…," he said, pausing with a shrug. "They've decided not to wait any longer and are having Deputies sent to serve Randall with an arrest warrant this afternoon. Until he's in custody, we've had guards on you twenty-four, seven," he said quietly.

She grimaced and nodded but didn't say anything for the longest time. His comment began to bring the memories flooding back and she trembled, unable to keep them contained. Tears started to leak down her face.

"Hey…," he said quietly as he picked up a box of tissues and pulled out a few to dab at her eyes carefully. "You're safe." He was careful not to touch her cheeks, knowing that one cheek bone was broken and the bruising in both alone was probably extremely painful.

"I've never felt so helpless in my whole life…or so angry," she said as she tried to take small breaths to avoid the pain caused by a deeper breath. She worked to get herself under control since this did nothing but make her hurt worse.

Matt was quiet as he stood next to her bed. "But you're alive, able to testify against him and bring this all to an end. Strangely enough, Jimmy figured out who you are the night you were shot. I was going to come up and talk to you about it the next morning." Matt grew quiet then for a minute as he looked at her with concern in his eyes. "Cody told me why he went to Lisa for you. When this is all over, you'll be free to make your own decisions on what you want to do," he offered quietly.

She thought she should have felt relief that he finally knew the truth, but there was a sense of something unspoken between them, something that was still undone. Clara looked up at him and saw a flicker of what might have been sadness in his eyes. Giving a slight, non-committal nod she changed the subject somewhat. "Why does my chest hurt? Here…," she asked, pointing tiredly to the center of it.

His face paled and then flushed. "You flat lined while we were trying to prep you for the flight to the hospital. We had to perform CPR on you," he stated quietly.

Her tired, pain filled blue eyes looked at him for a moment, a small spark of humor emerging within them, "So you finally got to lock lips with me huh?" she offered, trying to joke a little.

Matt blinked and a deep red flush appeared high on his cheeks, "Actually, that was Jimmy…"

Clara tried to make a face, "So…do I get a complimentary bottle of mouth wash to go along with that image?"

Cody and Jesse had just stepped off the elevator to head to Clara's room for their turn at 'guard duty' when the sound of Matt's surprised laughter could be heard down the hallway. Cody glanced at his father and both hurried their steps to see what had caused Matt to burst out like that.

Looking through the window of Clara's room, they saw that she was awake, though it was obvious by the pinched look to her face that she was in a great deal of pain. However, Matt was standing next to Clara's bed, chuckling and shaking his head, apparently finding something Clara had said very funny.

Cody exhaled in what could have only been utter relief and leaned against his dad for a minute. Jesse smiled at his youngest, putting an arm around his shoulders as they watched the two. She was awake, talking and was willing to fight whatever came next if the look on her face was any indication of the cast of her spirit.

TBC -