A/N: Okay, so first of, let me just say I really really wanted to post this earlier, but then a lot of things happened all at once. What was first supposed to be an intimate gathering of people for my mother's birthday quickly got out of hand and turned into something resembling a circus, so I've spent the last few days at home, trying to help with everything (and clinging onto my sanity). I hope you'll accept my sincerest apology for shamelessly promoting my story and making you review, just to completely fall back on my promise for a swift update, but as some of you probably know; when faced with the combined forces of one's family, one is often left powerless! Or something like that.
So, let me just respond to your kind words and then you can get on with the story!
Just me 33333: Not quite as soon as promised, but I hope you'll like it anyway
liferscove2118: I totally and shamelessly plugged my own story, you are absolutely right, but like you said, it worked. I'm glad you liked it, though and thank you for the review. I hope you'll enjoy this one as well.
Lea: Loving that you're loving it! Thank you so much!
Dcj: I know my updates have been like mind-blowingly slow, but thank you for being patient with me. Hope you'll find this one funny as well.
Curley-Q: I'll probably write something at some point featuring Finn in Stars Hollow, but for now you'll have to settle for this.
Problem Child1: As I am quite a fan or your work, your kind words definitely humble me. Thank you so much. I would love to read a story about Colin sleepwalking naked! No wait, that sounded wrong…..
KallianaCorus: I added a little extra rubberduck just for you. Hope you like it. There will probably be a chapter with Finn in Stars Hollow at some point. I'm already thinking about Miss Patty and her toxic punch and all the shenanigans Finn can come up with while there.
Diavoloduchessa: Not my favourite either, but I figured it was better than nothing. Thanks for the review!
Lauramelinda: Thank you so much, this kind of praise really warms my heart. I hope you enjoy this one.
Ok, almost at the end of the rant now (if you stayed with me for this long, your attention span is so much better than mine!). Generally speaking, all your reviews and kind words are amazing! I can't say how much it means to me that you both take the time to read this silly little story (which is not even an actual story), but also leave a comment for me. I think the next chapter is gonna be the continuation of chapter 5: An American student in Sydney, but I won't make any promises on when I'm gonna upload it, simply because I know how fickle my mind tends to be and I don't want to make promises I might not keep. I will promise to do my best to upload quickly, though. Also, a disclaimer: I own nothing but an overactive imagination and way too much time on my hands. Also, I have no beta, so all mistakes are mine.
Waking up in Vegas
The best way to describe the pounding currently going on her head was to compare it to elephants square dancing. Lots and lots of pounding going on, horrible and painful pounding like she had never experienced before.
"Oh god" Rory groaned and gently opened one eye. "Oh god!"
"Mind keeping it down, love? I'm dying over here!"
She recognized that voice, but it did nothing to soothe her. "Oh god!"
"You heard the man, shut up Gilmore" Colin's sour voice scolded her.
"Shut up Colin" Stephanie moaned.
Rory looked around. The room they had rented was completely trashed and it looked like people had just slept where they had passed out drunk. Stephanie was lying in an armchair, hugging a rubber duck. Colin had passed out at the piano. Rory could remember that he had tried to convince them all that he was a child prodigy like Mozart. On top of the piano was Lenny, who had tried to pull a Michelle Pfeiffer but failed miserably (partly because Colin had proved himself to be anything but a child prodigy like Mozart). He had apparently fallen asleep still wearing the red dress he had stolen out of Kennedy's trunk. Reagan and her sister, Kennedy, were sleeping on the couch. Kennedy was snoring lightly and wearing Lenny's tux. Rory looked around the room in horror. What the hell had happened last night?
"Okay, every time someone says 'black, 21' you have to drink a shot" Stephanie yelled and handed Rory a shot of tequila.
"That's ridiculous" Finn had interjected. "That way it will be hours before we're drunk. How about drinking whenever anyone bet?"
"Finn, you're already drunk" Kennedy pointed out and flicked her long blonde mane over her shoulder.
"Fine, suit yourselves. As if I care" Finn stated and emptied his shot, before stealing Rory's and walking off.
"Someone should probably follow him" Rory said, looking a little worried.
"Great, thanks for volunteering" Robert said and pushed her in the direction Finn had just wandered off to.
"Finn? Fiiiinn" Rory called out, trying to catch his attention.
"You look like you need this." Finn had popped up beside her with a glass of champagne.
"Thanks" she said, feeling pretty miserable while he downed the first glass. She wasn't sure this trip had been such a great idea on second thought.
"Oh god" Rory muttered again, as she leaned over the toilet bowl. She had not thrown up like this since she had gotten food poisoning from Al's chilli king prawns.
"Hey Rory, are you ok… OW" Stephanie suddenly yelled outside the bathroom. "Colin, that hurt!"
"SHUT! UP!" Colin growled.
Rory flushed the toilet and rinsed her mouth. She groggily exited the bathroom. The room still looked the same. Finn was sprawled out on the heart shaped bed she had apparently shared with him and Logan was half-sitting in a window sill, snoring lightly.
"Are you okay" Stephanie asked in a lower tone.
"No! What happened last night?"
"I have no idea" Stephanie said, also looking a little sick. "I don't even remember coming back to the room. Or Lenny putting on that dress. When did he do that?"
"A more important question is why" Robert muttered and pushed past Stephanie. "If you're done puking, Gilmore, some of us would like to use the bathroom."
"Yeah sure, go ahead" Rory said, moving away before he could throw up on her.
"My kingdom for a burger" Finn suddenly shouted, sitting up in the bed. He furrowed his brows and scratched his head. "Where are we?"
"Vegas, Finn" Stephanie said.
"Oh. Ok." He fell back in the bed and a few moments later he was snoring as well.
"So, how are you feeling?"
"Bad" Rory said, sitting down on a barstool. "Like, really horribly bad. And my back really hurts."
"Yeah? Did you hit it last night?"
"I don't know."
"Here, let me look" Stephanie said and Rory turned a little and let her pull up her shirt. "Oh… Oh god!"
"What" Rory asked. "What is it?"
"Oh god… It's… Oh god…"
"Stop saying that! What is it?"
"You better look for yourself" Stephanie said and led her over to a mirror.
Rory twisted around in order to get a better look. "Oh god! There's a tattoo on my back! Stephanie! There's a tattoo on my back!"
"Yeah" Stephanie said, looking like she wasn't sure whether she should laugh or cry.
"How the hell did I get a tattoo on my back?"
"I don't know, I can barely remember the evening."
"Oh god! Oh god!"
"Well, Rory you just have to look at it on the bright side. It's not a bad tattoo. Look, it's a pretty butterfly!"
"Why the hell would I want a butterfly tattooed on my back" Rory almost screamed.
"Seriously, are you dense? Shut up" Colin repeated from the piano.
"Colin! I have a tattoo on my back! A tattoo! I don't care if you're hungover" Rory screamed and threw Stephanie's rubber duck at him. "YOU shut up!"
"Geesh Ace, calm down" Logan muttered and tumbled off the windowsill. "It's just a tattoo."
"Just a tattoo" Rory hissed in a tone that was almost so high only dogs would be able to hear it. "Just a tattoo?"
"Obviously not the right thing to say" Robert supplied, as he exited the bathroom. Someone had, at some point during their 24-hour party, drawn a Hitler mustache on him and written "man love is beautiful" on his forehead. "Okay, who brought the prostitutes?"
Rory turned around and noticed two extremely scantily-clad women sleeping on the pooltable.
"This is such a disaster" Reagan muttered and sat up. "Oh god, I feel like I'm dying."
"You look it too" Robert said, sitting down on the bed. "I think Finn might actually be dead."
"I'm pretty sure he just broke the record of how much liquor one person can consume in one night" Stephanie said.
"Yeah and oh look. He's wearing a new ring. Oh that's pretty" Robert said, lying down next to Finn.
"He's what" Reagan asked with wide eyes.
"Oh my god, he is" Stephanie confirmed. "Is anyone wearing a ring?" She looked around the room with wild eyes, like the matching ring might just reveal itself.
Like the tattoo hadn't been shock enough, Rory gave her left hand a horrified look, like an evil zombie hand had somehow replaced it. She couldn't even make out actual words now, she just whimpered at the sight of her outstretched hand in front of her. "Get it off me!"
"Oh my god, Rory…"
"Get it off" she screamed and Reagan sprang into action, almost tackling her and pulling the evil ring of her finger.
"This is such a bad idea" Kennedy said and yet again tossed her blond mane over her shoulder.
"If she keeps that up, she's gonna end in a neckbrace" Stephanie muttered with an evil look in Kennedy's direction.
"Hey, what's up with…" Rory nudged in Kennedy's general direction.
"The names?" Rory nodded. "It's a family thing, I think."
"You should meet their brothers Clinton and Carter" Finn added, holding a new glass containing some kind of liquor. "Alright, who's up for some gambling?"
The boys followed Finn deeper into the casino, with the girls trailing along behind them.
"I feel like at least one of us should get married" Robert added. "What do you say, Kennedy? Shall it be you and I?"
"Robert, we're related" Kennedy pointed out.
"So? We could move to Texas and be very happy. Have four children all named after former presidents. Our firstborn could be a Garfield."
"Get away from me, freak."
"We should do some karaoke while we're here" Stephanie said and everyone groaned. Stephanie had a deep love of singing and she always auditioned for every play put up at Yale, but her skills didn't quite match her love.
"Maybe later" Logan said kindly, putting an arm around her.
Rory had decided to just roll with it. She was young, she was with friends (albeit friends who were slightly crazy) and she was in Vegas. "I think I need another drink."
"Here love, buy yourself something pretty" Finn said and tossed her his wallet.
"Finn, don't make her feel cheap" Reagan scolded. "Go with her to the bar and order her drink like the gentleman I know you like to pretend you are!"
"Why do I have to be all chivalrous all the time? I find that highly sexist."
"Come on Finn, I'll buy you a drink then" Rory offered, willing to do almost anything to avoid one of his infamous temper tantrums.
"Yeah with my own bloody money" he muttered, but followed her to the bar anyways. She ordered a beer for the both of them, although Finn complained it made him feel cheap. Rory just rolled her eyes and started to sort through his wallet, looking for some bills to pay with. "Finn what is this?"
"Love, I knew you were innocent…"
I know what it is" Rory said, not daring to look at the condom she had just found in his wallet. "Why are you walking around with a… with this?"
"Because I'm responsible" he said with a facial expression that made her feel like a six year old. "It happens that a young specimen of the female gender will sometimes make me a proposition, and well… Being a young redblooded male I sometimes find those sort of propositions hard to repel and then I prefer to be prepared."
"You're a regular boy scout" Rory muttered and paid for the beers.
"I suggest you put that back in there if you're not about to use it" he said and his tone had lost some of the humour.
Rory pursed her lips. It wasn't like she didn't know all the boys slept around, but coming face to face with this… Well it was just a little overwhelming. "Sorry" she muttered and handed him the wallet and condom without saying anymore. They walked back to the group without saying anymore.
"Rory, you bought a beer" Stephanie questioned with wrinkled eyebrows. "We're in Vegas and mister moneybags here is paying! Buy some champagne or at least one of those pink drinks with umbrellas."
"I have bad experience with those" Rory said.
Finn handed her a couple of bills. "For later, if you want something more fun" he muttered and walked away with Colin. Rory looked at the bills in her hand and noticed he had slipped the condom in between them.
"Does this mean…?" Stephanie was starring wideeyed at Rory.
"No. NO! Stop looking at me like that. NO!" Rory was definitely freaking out now; it took all her willpower to just remain standing.
"Okay seriously, what's going on" Logan asked groggily. "Why are you all screaming?"
"Finn and Rory" Stephanie screamed.
"NO!" Rory yelled, trying to stop her, but to no avail.
"Are married!"
"What? How?" Colin looked at them.
"Is there pictures" Kennedy asked, almost gleefully and Rory was reminded why she definitely preferred the red-haired sister to the blonde one.
"Seriously, you wouldn't even complete a date with me, but you'll marry an Australian drunk" Robert asked. "I find that somewhat hypocritical."
"Wait wait wait…. Ace married Finn? When did that happen" Logan asked.
"Probably just before she got that snazzy new tattoo" Stephanie said with a laugh.
"Steph! This is not funny! I can't be married!"
"Relax, you'll get an annulment" Colin said. "They give them all the time. My mouth feels weird."
"Colin! Oh my god!" Reagan took a tentative step towards him. "Your teeth!"
"What?"
Steph shared a look with Reagan. "They're missing!"
"What?" He almost flew up form the piano bench and placed himself of the mirror Rory had just been inspecting her new butterfly tattoo in. "Where is my front teeth" he yelled.
"You look like ridiculously idiotic" Lenny commented from the piano. He seemed to find the dress comfortable enough to just stay in the position he was in, on top of the piano.
Logan scrunched his face. "Wait, I think I remember this. Robert hit you last night."
"No I didn't" Robert interjected from the bed.
"Maybe it was Kennedy then."
"Yeah, because we look so much alike" Kennedy said and finally got up. "Okay, seriously, why am I wearing a tux?"
"You wanted to feel what it was like to be a guy" Logan supplied. "You look better than Lenny."
"And I look better than Kennedy. Is that a conundrum?" Lenny turned around and struck a pose on the piano.
"No, it's a lie" Stephanie said. "Colin, do you remember what happened?"
"I definitely had all my teeth when we came up here after Finn got us kicked out of the casino and before we sneaked back in again."
"Okay, so maybe they're around here somewhere" Logan said.
"Yeah, we can look for them while we search for Mrs Morgan's marriage certificate" Robert said. "So you're like entitled to half of everything of his, huh?"
"We are not married" Rory spat at him. "And I don't want any of his things."
"By the looks of it, I think you're a widow" Stephanie said, poking Finn with the rubber duck. "He looks completely dead."
Logan rolled his eyes and walked over to the bed. "Oh hey Mr Morgan. Are you looking for your son" he said in a rather loud voice that made Rory's head vibrate.
Finn flew off the bed in a tangle of limbs and sheets. "What? I'm up, I'm alive!" He looked around disorientated.
"Guess you're not a widow, Ace" he said with a smirk.
"Great" she muttered and sat down on the floor.
"Whaz happin" Finn asked, rubbing his eyes. "Robert, you had a makeover?"
"What?" Robert gave Finn an equally disorientated look.
"What the hell happened to your hair, Finn" Logan asked, laughing.
"Whaa?"
"You look like a pale Mr T" Stephanie agreed, also laughing.
"I found one" Colin suddenly yelled and triumphantly held up a tooth. "Oh wait… I don't think this is mine." He narrowed his eyes at the tooth. "Ew!"
"Come on, Rory" Stephanie squealed. She was so drunk she was beyond hiccups and it was surprising she was still standing. Honestly, it was amazing any of them were standing.
"Nooooo. I hate karaoke" Rory moaned and hid her face.
"Your loss" Robert said and almost pushed Stephanie off the stage before launching into a somewhat off-key version of Kung Fu Fighting, with Stephanie delivering backup "vocals". Finn and Lenny soon joined them on stage and tried to actually kung fu fight each other. It ended when Lenny delivered a somewhat off roundhouse kick directly in Finn's direction.
"I think that's mine" Finn said and held out his hand. Colin obligingly gave him the tooth. "Oh look, I have a ring. Did someone propose to me last night?"
Rory gave Stephanie a deathglare; she was about ready to burst at the seams from laughter.
"Man, you got married last night" Logan supplied helpfully and also sat down on the floor.
"Oh hey Logan, nice tat" Lenny said.
"What?"
They all turned to look at Logan who had suddenly noticed something on his left upper arm.
"Classy" Stephanie snorted, shaking with laughter at Logan's heartshaped tattoo with the words "momma's boy" written in it.
"Matches Gilmore's butterfly" Robert said.
"Hey, where did you get that rubber duck" Kennedy asked Stephanie, who was still clutching it.
"I got married last night? I don't even remember" Finn said, before Stephanie could answer. "Who was the lucky Sheila?"
"That would be Rory" Kennedy said. "Lenny, your tux smell weird.
"Yeah, I accidently threw up on it on purpose last night before you put it on. Sorry" he said with a smirk.
"You suck" Kennedy screamed and fled to the bathroom.
"Hey, Lenny in red, you're paying my trip to the dentist" Finn said, pocketing the tooth. "So, wifey…. Mind getting me a burger!"
"I'll get you a divorce" Rory countered.
"Why must I always go for the emotional unavailable ones?"
"Come on guys, we should probably look for the certificate. And Colin's teeth" Reagan said and started to turn over pillows.
One of the prostitutes (at least Rory thought they were prostitutes) woke up and without a word she left the suite.
"Well, that's was rude" Robert said as she slammed the door. "No tips for her!"
"Oh my god, why didn't she make her friend leave as well" Stephanie asked with a look of disbelief. She looked at Rory and they both started to laugh. This whole situation was just so weird.
"Found one" Logan called. "There you go Colin, you'll be pretty again in no time!"
"Did I steal this?" They all turned to look at Stephanie. "I have this feeling like… I think I stole this." She was holding up the rubber duck.
"A whole show with rubber ducks" Robert asked incredulously. "I thought the point of rubber ducks were that they all looked the same."
"That's hardly the point, moron" Logan said. "Regan wants to go, so we'll go."
"I'm not drunk enough for this" Stephanie muttered, as they paid their ticket to see a whole show dedicated solely to rubber ducks.
"This is so weird" Rory whispered to Finn as they hung back from the others.
"I never truly understood Reagan's fascination with rubber ducks" Finn said as he looked at a rubberduck dressed as Dolly Parton. "Maybe it's the ginger in her?"
"I think it runs a little deeper than that" Rory said. "Look at that. That is just…. Wrong." She gestured at a rubber duck dressed as the Queen of England.
"And oddly, very fitting" Finn said. "So, you had enough?"
"I had had enough before we bought the tickets" Rory said.
"Yeah me too. Honestly, rubber ducks give me the creeps. Same with clowns. I mean, what's their purpose? What's hidden underneath all that makeup and swagger."
"One of life's great mysteries" Rory said, as they sneaked out together. "So, where to now?"
"Want something fun?"
"I'm a little afraid of your definition of fun."
Finn gave her a smile. "Come now, love. Would I ever proposition any kind of dirty suggestion in your general direction."
"You do that like five times a day."
"Oh. Well… Let's go gamble with my trust fund, shall we?"
Rory was just about to turn around and follow Finn, when Stephanie busted through the doors of the show, clutching a rubber duck. She was closely followed by Lenny and Colin, who were then brutally tackled by two securityguards.
"I guess she was drunk enough to steal a rubber duck" Finn said, staring after Stephanie, who was making a break for it.
"She's very fast" Rory said, also staring after Stephanie.
"Well, that explains the teeth. And the rubber duck" Logan said. "Why don't I remember this?"
"I think we in the Dolly section and didn't see them stealing it" Reagan said, scratching her head.
"Okay, so where is my other tooth" Colin asked. "I'm gonna need it!"
"You know, it makes you look oddly mandly" Kennedy said. "Like a hockey player!"
"Yeah, except Colin doesn't even know what hockey is" Lenny snorted.
"Can we please get back to the important issue here" Rory begged. "I need that certificate so we can get an annulment!"
"Now why do you go and spoil a beautiful moment like this" Finn asked with furrowed brows. "And to think I was gonna take you to Fiji for our honeymoon!"
"I'll go" Regan volunteered, sounding only a little bit desperate.
"Could someone please wake up that hooker? She's giving me the creeps, just lying there" Stephanie asked.
Robert rolled his eyes and walked over to the pool table. "Okay, Julia Roberts, time to hit the road" he said, poking the woman. "Mr T over there will pay you on your way out!"
She grumbled something, but got off the table and accepted a couple of bills from Finn before she left the room.
"Thank god" Stephanie exclaimed.
Rory sat down on the bed next to Finn. "This is so horrible" she whispered.
"Well thank you love. Please, don't worry about my feelings!"
"Oh shut up! This is all a big joke to you but I can't come home married. I already have a tattoo I need to have removed, now I need an annulment as well!"
"To be honest, I'm pretty sure you'll find someone around here that can take care of both those problems at the same time" Robert supplied.
"You're gonna need a divorce, not an annulment" Kennedy said.
"WHAT?"
"Yeah. Because, you know, you only get annulments when it wasn't consumed. And it was."
Rory's eyes looked like they might roll out of her head in any moment. "No we didn't!"
"Yeah, you did, remember" Kennedy said, studying her nails like this was no big deal. Rory felt like yanking every single fake red nail off and shoving them up a certain something! "I saw it!"
"You spied on us?"
"No" she said, like Rory was mentally challenged. "I saw you. Duh!"
As it turned out, Finn was an atrociously bad gambler. Rory, on the other hand, was quite talented at black jack, and while Finn had already gambled away a year's tuition, Rory was up a couple of thousands.
"Alright there, love?"
"I don't think I've ever had this much money in my hands at one time" Rory said, as she had cached in her chips. "I'm thinking about rolling around in them, just to try it!"
Finn laughed at her, leading her out of the casino. "I think you need more than a couple of thousand for it to be a proper experience."
Rory made a face. "Yeah, you're probably right." She sighed. "It would have been fun to try."
"Listen, when Logan passes out, I'll nick his wallet and then you'll probably have enough for one good roll."
Rory giggled at that. She was beginning to feel all the champagne she had been drinking. "Maybe we should find the others?"
"Yeah, I think Steph went back to our suite. Colin and Lenny are probably paying for her rubber duck stunt as we're speaking."
"What about the presidential sisters?"
"Ten bucks says Kennedy has somehow managed to loose at least half her clothes by now and is streaking around here somewhere. Reagan is probably helping Robert around. Not to sure about Logan, although there might be an off chance he's following Kennedy around like a lose puppy."
"Wow Finn, you're like a prophet" Rory gushed.
"Too right I am. And I predict you're gonna make out with me soon!"
"Okay, hold up" Kennedy suddenly said. "I don't streak."
"Yeah, you kinda do" Lenny and Logan said at the same time. Reagan nodded just for good measure.
"Then why the hell don't you fuckers stop me?"
The guys gave each other looks and started to mumble different things like "too hard", "you're so fast", "don't want to spoil your fun."
"I am never going to Vegas with you guys ever again" Kennedy screamed and threw a pillow at her sister.
Stephanie rubbed her eyes. "Okay, so I stole the rubber duck, which got Lenny and Colin in trouble. And Colin lost his two front teeth. But… When did you two get tattooed? And when did Rory become Mrs T."
"Someone hand me a mirror" Finn demanded, feeling a little annoyed at his new nick name. Reagan threw him one from her purse. "I pity the fool who did this to my hair" he muttered, running his hand along his new mohawk.
"Wait, I saw you down at the chapel! You were talking with Colin" Regan told Finn. "And I think that was after Stephanie stole the rubber duck."
"I'm so confused right now" Logan said. "Oh, there you go Colin. Another tooth." He handed Colin his other missing tooth.
"Great, now I just need to get them reattached."
"We'll go together. I might as well get new grills to match the do" Finn said. "And Lenny over there is paying!"
"Am not!"
"Fine, why don't I roundhouse kick you in the gob then?"
"Guys, can we fight later" Stephanie asked. "My head is like seriously killing me and we still need the certificate."
"Yeah and I'd like to now how I ended up with this" Logan said, looking at his tattoo.
"Okay, so Rory and I left the casino and then what" Finn asked.
"Well, I saw you at the elevator" Kennedy said.
"There is no way that is going to happen. Ever" Rory said, still smiling.
"Why not?"
"You're not my type!"
"I'm gorgeous, I'm tan and I'm exotic. I'm everyone's type!"
"You're a little bit too bad boy for me."
"Bad boy? Me?"
"Yeah, just admit it" Rory said, as they stood and waited for the elevator. "You drink, you do stupid things, you smoke…"
"Okay, but I also go to Yale and come from a somewhat respectable family, not counting my granddad, and I know CPR."
"You're still the bad boy. And I've had that."
"Now you certainly have my full attention" he said with a smirk and leaned in. "Little Mary had a bad boy?"
"Don't call me that!"
His smirk got wider. "Admit it, love. You find me attractive."
"So what if I do? It's not gonna change anything."
He leaned in further and Rory suddenly had the urge to flee. "You sure about that?"
Just as Rory was about to answer, the elevator pinged and the doors opened. The champagne was definitely getting to her, she thought as she wobbled into the elevator, followed by Finn. They stood for a few moments in silence, waiting for the doors to close and then suddenly Rory almost lunged at Finn. She wasn't sure why she did it, but it was like something in her compelled her to do it.
He responded instantly, lifting her up on the railings and leaning in so she could feel all of him. He had managed to open her bra and remove a shoe when the doors suddenly pinged again and two elder women gasped at them. Finn practically flew back, his pants between his ankles, while Rory feverishly tried to button her shirt.
"Sinners" the smallest lady hissed at them as the doors closed again.
Rory stared at Finn for a moment. He looked ridiculous and then they both burst out laughing.
"I've never done something like this before" Rory gasped between laughs.
"Really? Happens to me all the time" Finn laughed and pulled up his pants.
"Nice briefs" Rory said.
"They're Colin's" Finn defended his choice in underwear.
"That so doesn't help your case" Rory laughed even harder.
"So, are we continuing this or what?"
"No, I'm going to bed" Rory said, still smiling. "I am way to drunk to be running around with you!"
"You wound me, love" he said, buttoning his pants. "I want another chance when we're sober."
"You'd have to be sober then!"
"Yeah, so?"
"Deal. But only if you cook for me."
"I only cook for girls I really like."
Rory smiled a little wider. "So, you'll do it?"
"Yeah."
"But… They didn't have sex up here" Stephanie said. "I remember Rory coming up, and then Logan and Lenny came. And we started to sing that Spice Girl song."
"Yeah and then you passed out in the middle of 'Wannabe'" Logan said. "And Ace and I… Oh no."
"What" Rory asked.
"Well, you made fun of me and then I dared you to get a tattoo. And you said you'd only do it if I did it. And then…"
"We did it… Figuratively speaking" Rory said with a frown.
"Well, I guess you know what to spend all those money on now" Reagan said.
"So, did you get married after that" Robert asked.
"No, we were together the whole time. Finn and Colin joined us later and we all rode up here together" Logan said.
"That makes no sense" Stephanie pointed out. "When did they get married?"
"Maybe they didn't" Lenny said.
"Then why are they wearing rings" Kennedy pointed out.
"Maybe because they thought they were pretty" Robert said. "So can we all just go home now? I need to come up with a really good story to cover for all the money I lost."
Rory had a bad feeling about this. She was pretty sure she wouldn't just wear some random a ring because she thought it was pretty. But she had no recollection of going anywhere near a chapel and she remembered they had met up with Colin and Finn a little while later. She had still been drunk (which was why she had agreed to that stupid tattoo to begin with), but she was pretty sure no one had gotten married on the elevator ride up to their suite.
"Look" Stephanie said, noticing Rory's worried expression. "We'll order some breakfast and start packing. That will make it easier to find a marriage certificate, should one even exist, ok?"
Rory reluctantly agreed. She was more interested in calling CSI:Las Vegas and have them come and sweep the suite for any evidence of a marriage certificate, but she didn't think the others would agree to that.
After breakfast they all slowly started to pack. Lenny had finally decided to loose the dress and was now walking around in underwear. Stephanie had hidden the rubber duck (which she had decided to name Liberace) in between her underwear, claiming it to be necessary because she was probably wanted for theft by now and the airports would have her photo (at which both Logan and Finn had rolled their eyes violently). Reagan and Logan were sitting at the bar, talking intimately about something and eating pancakes and Kennedy had grudgingly obliged to help Robert find his shoes.
Colin was tucking his teeth into his wallet when he suddenly yelped.
"What" Logan asked from the bar.
"There's a marriage certificate in here!"
"Seriously" Stephanie asked.
"Yeah, look." He handed her the certificate.
A mix of emotions crossed Stephanie's face and she suddenly slapped her hand over her mouth.
"What" Rory asked anxiously. She needed to see that paper!
"Well, good news Rory" Stephanie said, trying her hardest not to laugh. "It's not yours!"
"Really? I'm not married?" The relief was practically rolling off her.
"Nope…. You just need to give back your ring to Colin and then he can have this fine certificate as a nice little reminder of his and Finn's nuptials."
Logan almost fell off his chair and a very squeaky and unmanly noise erupted from Colin. "Me…. And Mr T?"
"You must have given your ring to Rory for some reason" Stephanie reasoned, handing the certificate to Rory so she could see for herself.
"Finn, you're being awfully quiet" Robert said.
"I have no words…. Literally, I have no words" Finn muttered.
Logan looked at Lenny and Robert with a smirk. "I guess there's only one thing to say, then. I pity the fool!"