A/N: I appreciate my reviewers. No, I would never forget you guys. So glad to see my numbers slowly increasing for reads. Don't be shy, throw me a thumb's up if you like it, and a middle finger if you hate it.
"Okay, you've got to tell me how you got away without getting your ass fired," Paige flopped on to the bed of their shared hotel room, clad in black sweats and a plain white t-shirt. She had already taken her clip-in extensions out and washed off her stage makeup, ready to get to bed rather than hang around the divas. They, after all, planned on getting totally tipsy tonight, and unfortunately for Paige, she had to be at the performance center at nine in the morning to run some drills. That, and in light of today's events, she couldn't stand to leave AJ sit there and wallow in her self-pity.
"You don't want to know," AJ didn't even look up at her friend while she spoke, her nose buried in a comic book, munching on a bag of cheese popcorn.
"First of all, yes I do. And second of all, no," Paige snatched the fatty food away, shaming AJ for her unhealthy decision. Their dietitian would have a heart attack if he knew she was absentmindedly sowing down a whole bag of greasy, cheese corn.
"Hey!" AJ protested, her head snapping up in objection. But the feeling must've passed, as she stuck out her tongue and got back to her book.
"Seriously? I'll snatch that from you next," Paige threatened, and her eyebrows knitted together, proving she was very serious about her intentions.
AJ sighed. "I should've gotten shit canned. And I'm going to wish that I was, I'm sure of it. My knight in shining armor decided to let the officials know that Brie and Nikki kind of took it too far, provoking an attack."
"And that would be who, exactly? Big E?"
AJ threw her comic down, sliding her thick-rimmed glasses off, tossing them on the bedside table next to her.
"The funny thing is, it was that slimy worm, Seth Rollins. And I know that I had tunnel vision in that moment, but I really don't remember him even being over in that area at all," she admitted shyly. "But, regardless, the Princess beckoned me into the dungeon, and even though I expected a brutal slaying, I instead have to perish to the wicked witch of the WWE."
"Okay, I have no idea what you're talking about, but you gotta quit beating around the bush. And no, I don't think Rollins was around, either."
"I have to lose to fucking...ugh," AJ tore her eyes away, standing up from her chair she'd been glued to since she'd gotten back from the show. She still couldn't wrap her head around the day. Not to mention, everyone kept bringing up one this post about her ex-husband. She fought everything in her not to go looking for it. She ignored every alert her phone sang in her direction, knowing that right now, she couldn't handle whatever potential mockery would await her.
Of course, she figured this big "news" was just TMZ reporting on the very same crap she'd packed a bag in the middle of the night for. Phil's new...old...whatever...relationship was nothing new to her, anyways, and if she'd learned anything from people who were in the midst of really horrible scandals, she just had to stand tall and proud, and own it. Pretend it never happened, move on, and eventually, find peace and happiness.
"AJ!" Paige yelled again, and put her thinking back on track. She'd been doing that more and more lately; allowing her brain to go on these crazed tangents with no real result or solution. Instead, she just became more and more anxious, secluding herself from people more than she normally might.
"Sorry, sorry...it's just truly that awful. I've got to lose to Eva Marie," she stated matter-of-factly, and Paige's face fell in disbelief.
"You're shitting me, right?"
AJ shook her head, her lips pursed. She wanted to say more, but words failed her.
"Well, at least you have a job," she sighed, offering a gentle hug to the shorter woman. AJ accepted, allowing herself to feel bad.
"I know. I just don't see myself hearing the end of this one. I wish I could just understand, why her? When they've got Dana and Emma and Bayley on NXT, blowing the place up. Or Alexa, even, makes Eva look stupid in the ring. Those women have more drive than she ever would, and I am so sad to see that the only reason is because she's stunning."
Paige snapped her fingers, gesturing one finger towards her. "You got it, babe. She's smoking hot, so we'll force our fans to watch her continuously botch her own finisher. WWE logic, like usual."
"I made sure they knew it wouldn't be a clean loss. But it's still a Pay-Per-View loss, which really sucks, because it knocks me down further on the ladder," AJ continued.
"Which is exactly what WWE wanted," Paige remarked, and AJ agreed, though she hadn't thought of that initially. Paige tucked her hands behind her head, staring at the ceiling.
"So, do you have plans for the next few days? I know that you have off, too, after the performance center tomorrow. I just don't really know what I'm going to do with myself. You have a guest room at your place with Kevin, right?" AJ had unintentionally sounded hopeful, and she couldn't hide the shakiness that went along with it.
"Aw, AJ, I'm sorry. I've got to do this thing with Kevin's band, it's some special appearance they're making," she frowned. "Not that that's what I'd really like to be doing, but he's supportive, so I ought to be as well. Still, I'd prefer actually spending time at the house that we spent way too much on to never be at."
Shit. Now what was AJ going to do?
"You've got all night to figure it out, my darling crumpet. I wouldn't worry too much about it," Paige offered, her eyes still closed.
AJ could sense that Paige was exhausted, and would soon be snoozing. Instead of climbing to bed, too, she suddenly got the urge to do something. Anything, really; she just wanted to keep her mind busy. It was silly that she sit there while she was wide awake and watch her friend crash. So, quickly fumbling for a pair of blue jean shorts and a zip up hoodie, she slid on her most beat-up pair of Chucks without bothering to put on her socks, grabbed her phone from the tiny table that the hotel provided them, and headed out the door.
Wandering through the hotel with nowhere to go, she probably looked like a disgruntled teenager forced on a family vacation. A few bellhops eyed her up, but she pretended not to notice. She was good at pretending nobody existed.
Wishing she could just pull herself out of this funk she put herself in, she recounted the memory of John Cena being nice enough to be with her as she opened up her finalized divorce papers. Big d. God, she still couldn't believe it.
"You tend to roam the halls an awful lot," someone said to her, standing in the shadow. She hoped it wasn't who it was, but with her luck...well, of course it was.
"Seth," she replied, quirking an eyebrow at him. "Are you following me?"
Seth smiled-ugh, those teeth again!-and shook his head. "No, sweetcheeks. I'm trying to get hold of Leighla, and the only place I can get any reception is right here." he motioned towards the corner, his mood improved yet again since the last time that he saw her. He had his hair pulled back in a manbun, but somehow, he pulled it off.
Oh...of course.
"I see. I just have a lot on my mind, you know...oh! And thank you for lying to the Authority to save my ass. That was the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me," AJ said quickly, wishing she could just clamp her mouth shut. Seriously, sometimes her brain just didn't know when to stop her mouth from opening.
"Lie? I would never. What I said happened really did happen; Nikki and Brie tried to rip open a very raw wound. On purpose, at that. I don't think you did the world a disservice by throwing that self-righteous bitch a hook."
AJ smirked, feeling better. "I appreciate it. But you weren't even there."
"Nah, but sometimes you just know." his eyes flitted back to his sleek phone, which was suddenly illuminating in the corner. With a quick thumb, he slid open his screen, quickly rolled them across as he made a sour face. It was safe to assume he'd gotten his response from Leighla back, but not what he'd hoped to hear. Still, AJ felt kind of stupid standing there as he griped over his ex-fiancée, so she began edging towards the door that was marked "EXIT" just towards the left of her obstacle.
"Sorry, I don't mean to be rude. Want some company?"
Um...no, she thought bitterly to herself, but instead heard herself agreeing. She'd been so sick of holing up in her hotel room and limiting herself to very basic contact with actual human beings. She reminded herself that Seth Rollins was known to be a lying douchebag, but yet something in her head found him intriguing. So, she went with it.
"Girl problems," he held up his phone, tucking it into his sweatshirt pocket. He began walking, and she followed suit. It was almost as though he had her on an invisible leash, guiding her down the empty hallway. What time was it, even? Not that it mattered.
"Must be fun," she responded more coldly than she'd intended, and he shot a look her way.
"Of course it's not. You know how it is, being watched by the whole world. Always having your personal life thrown in front of anyone who will look. Well, Leighla called me in a rage, demanding to know why I was seen out with Zahra again."
"Oh," AJ responded, keeping her eyes low and watching her Chucks beat against the horrifying gray carpeting of the hotel. Where were they going? Again, these things didn't matter.
"I mean, it's not her problem. Because we're not together anymore..." he trailed off, looking annoyed again. "But, in truth, the picture that was reported was taken three months ago. It just got leaked because right now, there's nothing out there about me. You know why? Because I work, sleep, and work out. That's it. I can't handle being watched, or gossiped about. I fucked up, and I know that much. But I kind of just want them to let me be, and stop worrying about what I did."
AJ didn't respond, but she understood exactly what he meant. Tucking her hands in her hoodie, she began mentally counting the steps she was taking. In an odd way, it was kind of nice to be the listener; Rollins obviously had plenty on his mind, too. He had just as many problems as she did.
"So what about you?" he asked after a long, drawn out silence as they finally hit the staircase towards the exit. They had seriously walked around the squared floor, right back where they started. And AJ hadn't said more than a few words. But then again, she knew better than to trust anyone at this point; knowing fully well that she had a target on her back for many reasons. Of course, she wasn't making any friends as of late; but mostly because she'd burned so many bridges just to be with...
"What about me?"
"What's going on in your mind? You haven't said much. You must be angry that finally, the public got hold of Punk leaving you," he said the last part with an edge, and now, it was AJ's turn to give him an eyebrow. It was almost as if he knew that, in fact, she was the one that left. But how would he? Phil was such an asshole to most, so it was assumed that he was the one to break things off with her. She got it, and she accepted it. She opted not to comment on it more times than she could count. Yet, somehow, she wanted to set the record straight with Seth. Make it known that she was nothing like him-she wasn't a cheater, she had been in the very same position as Leighla, in fact; finding the messages on Phil's phone while he was in Milwaukee...
Can't wait to see you again. I miss you so much. -A
Great seeing you. Next time, (non-alcoholic) drink's on me. -A
I'm sorry things aren't going well for you guys. Hope it's not because of me. -A
I know things didn't work with us back then, but people change. Maybe you have, too. -A
All those stupid texts that she'd found when he'd accidentally left his phone in the desk drawer while traveling...they rolled through her mind a mile a minute, and her anxiety was beginning to rise, a choked feeling at the pit of her stomach and rising quickly...
Phil, we need to talk, ASAP. -A
I don't know what else to do. Will you be in Milwaukee this weekend? I'll meet you there if so. -A
"Yeah, well. That's the fun of being a crazy chick," she responded nonchalantly, trying to dismiss all of those stupid text messages. Those were the straw that broke the camel's back-well, one in particular-but she should have seen it all coming. He stopped being the loving, caring guy that she fell for. He'd stopped being romantic altogether, having no libido whatsoever. He'd make excuses for why they couldn't have sex. He'd make excuses for why they couldn't hang out. And once she'd found out about...her...
Seth paused, opening the door to the back of the hotel, where they could get a quiet and quick escape from whoever might be watching, awaiting the emergence of any WWE figure.
"AJ, I don't believe for a second that he was the one to leave you. You can't fool me."
"What do you mean?" she got nervous, biting her lip and not knowing what to say.
"I mean...I've worked with the guy. He half-asses everything, including break-ups...just ask Daffney, or Maria. That's why I know that rather than be a man and leave you, he let you find out that he...well, did what he did. And you have a brain. You packed up your shit and left."
AJ didn't respond, fumbling with the strings of her hoodie as means of keeping herself busy. She didn't want to let Rollins into her mindset, and certainly didn't want to tell him what had happened exactly. The only people she'd told the truth to included Stephanie McMahon and Paige, and she had intended to keep it that way. Everyone else could speculate all they wanted, but at the end of the day, she didn't want the world to know the truth. It was a wall she'd quickly built up, to just let her ignorance be her bliss.
"You don't have to talk about it, if you don't want to. But I know exactly what is going on, because I'm a lot smarter than people would expect. I see that article for what it is."
Still no response from AJ. She wanted to, and could feel real, actual words forming on her lips. But still, the nagging voice in the back of her mind reminded her who she was speaking to and why she shouldn't trust him.
Because he's just like Phil. No different. Not at all.
He was having fun pushing AJ's buttons.
While he didn't want to piss her off, it was still entertaining. And, it was kind of nice to know that she had very real problems of her own. The WWE could showcase their talents all day long, but at the end of the day, they were real people going through the same issues that Joe Schmoe was. The only difference was, their fuck-ups were publicized.
He really hoped he'd get her to talk and open up about whatever happened. Again, while he knew by using common context clues the gist of the problem, he wanted to hear that he was right. Not to mention, she'd been a lone wolf since she'd arrived back. And while she hadn't exactly always been Little Miss Sunshine, the way she was right now was a sad, pathetic version of herself. All she needed, he thought, was the right motivation to get her headed in the right direction.
Call it his charity work for the year.
Although, he had to admit, it was also nice to talk to her about all these things going on in his life. He could talk to Kevin or Cesaro all day long, but since they were both in good places in their own lives, they hardly helped. They would just gently remind Seth that his bad attitude was self-inflicted; starting with Zahra Schreiber and the loss of the best person he'd ever met.
"I'm still humiliated to this day," he said quietly as he watched AJ draw her black hoodie closer to her. Had she always been so tiny? They hit the cool air of the outside, no purpose or destination in mind. It was still nice to get out of the hotel, and away from all of those people who constantly judged him. "I try, every day, to apologize to Lay. I loved her, and I really fucked up. I mean, for a little while, she tried to look past Zahra...but how can you? You can't just ignore the fact that someone screwed you over."
"You don't love her anymore?" he heard AJ ask, but she was still staring at her feet.
Seth thought about it. "Of course I do. But, there was a part of me that was searching for an out. Sometimes, we know things aren't right. We know things aren't as happy as we let on. So in my case, I found a reason to leave Iowa behind forever, Leighla included."
"Zahra," AJ replied quietly, stopping under a streetlamp. Seth couldn't help but note the glittering effect it brought over her normally ashen face; she looked...better. He wouldn't quite say that she looked happy, but the light that was shining in her eyes was something that he hadn't seen from her since she'd returned to the WWE ring. She stuffed and un-stuffed her hands from her pockets, clearly uncomfortable.
Why was she so unaware of how beautiful she really was? Seth wondered to himself, but pushed it away quickly. She was nothing like the Leighla or Zahra, or any of his previous girlfriends, for that matter. She didn't care about materialistic things; she just was comfortable in her own skin, doing her own thing, and not listening or responding to any bullshit. He watched as she finally allowed herself to look into his eyes, an emptiness reflecting back at him.
"That was a mistake. I mean, she was a mistake altogether. But if I could change one thing in the world...I'd change going about things the way I did."
"I bet. Must be hard to have your dick all over the internet," she responded with ease, and Seth was intrigued yet again. She kept doing the hot/cold thing, and it was a weird game of cat and mouse.
"At least, in my defense, nobody said it was tiny. At least not that I can tell," he joked.
AJ paused, a shocked look on her face. She still shone brightly under the streetlamp, and if Seth were to be cliche about it, he'd compare her to an angel in a hoodie and Chucks.
"I was kidding," he said quickly, and she turned away from him.
"You weren't."
"Okay, not really. But I was trying to make light of the situation."
"How can you make light of a situation when someone else got hurt?"
Seth considered her question. "AJ, there were a lot of people who got hurt. A lot of stupid choices, and a lot of crying. A lot of bullshit publicity, and even more fake articles. Do you think Zahra and I actually continued our relationship past the initial reports? No fucking way."
"It doesn't make it okay."
She was beginning to annoy him, just as she normally did. He wanted to tell her off, remind her who exactly he was. Yet she was a shoo-in for a first-ballot hall of fame diva herself, and he couldn't exactly use his status with the company as leverage. He bit his lip, forcing himself not to say any of the things he wanted to.
"I know," he responded. "But if it's any consolation to you and the shit Punk put you through, I'm getting my karma in so many ways."
She watched him once again, and he sensed that she was trying to come up with something that was intended to hurt him.
"Good," she said simply, still looking straight at him. "Because the pain I felt reading the messages that verified any and all doubts I had about my relationship should never, ever be felt by any person. Especially when you're married or engaged to be," she stabbed him quickly, expecting him to cringe.
He didn't.
Seth didn't expect her to see it from his point of view. AJ had pretty much made up her mind, identifying with Leighla in that she'd gotten..ahem, cheated on.
Seth didn't respond, but instead, gave her a million-dollar smile, to which she rolled her eyes at and began trudging along the cement sidewalk again, towards the hotel.
Before she got too far, he called out her name. She spun around, still within earshot. "If you are always so focused on what you left behind, you'll never be able to see what lies ahead," he told her, and she shook her head, spinning back around and ignoring him some more. That was something that Cesaro had told him fairly recently, and it was a motto he kept reminding himself every day since. It had improved his thought process, at least; and Seth wasn't such an angry asshole lately. He'd hoped, being in a similar pattern of thought, it'd make a great impact on AJ's conscience as well.
He followed her, turning on heel to head back, too.
"Why are you even talking to me? You're fucking Seth Rollins," she demanded to know, her strides as quick as her short legs could make them. Seth, however, kept up with ease.
"I know I am. But you're fucking AJ Lee. And whether you want to admit it or not, we are a lot more alike than anyone would think."
She paused yet again, her eyes holding his. He couldn't pry them away.
"How? I got hurt a lot in my relationship, and I was forced to return to a company that nobody wants me to to be at. I was embarrassed, I was short-changed, and I was robbed of my career because I put it all in the hands of someone who, at the end of the day, screwed me over. What about you? Well, let's consider that, Seth. You're the top heel of a company that nobody really likes, and sure, you screwed over someone you claimed to love- by CHEATING! So in my eyes, you and Phil, you're exactly the same." AJ was beginning to spark back up, and Seth couldn't even respond, even though he wanted to defend himself. He really had nothing to say; pretty much all of her accusations were factual.
"I know what you're saying, AJ. But you and I are in the same boat, just rowing opposite directions," they found their way back to the back entrance of the hotel, and he held the door open for her as she ducked inside. He noted that her legs were dotted with goosebumps, and he'd wished he'd offered her his own sweatshirt as well as the one she wore. "I really want to be friends," he commented once they were inside. "I just...honestly, I don't want to feel so alone anymore."
She narrowed her eyes, and he realized she was considering his offer.
"Nobody likes me much as it is," she stated. "And as fucked up as your logic is, it was really nice talking to you," she smiled simply, and Seth could feel that weird fluttery feeling again.
"Can we go for a walk again sometime?"
AJ pulled her hood down, revealing her dark-brown hair. The bright fluorescent lights of the hotel hallway showed that a small trail of tears had trickeled down her face. A satisfied look mixed with resentment on Seth's new therapist's face, he knew that she didn't fully trust him. He wished, momentarily, that he could make her believe that he was a good guy, and just made a stupid decision.
He also had to remind himself that no matter if they talked once in awhile, or everyday, he couldn't let himself fall again. They were both damaged people, after all, and the last thing he wanted to do was damage both of them even further. She would be off-limits, he'd decided.
But god, she was prettier than he ever remembered her to be...
"Can I see your phone?" she asked him quietly, and he obliged. He wondered if Leighla had shot him a text back, but for a split second, he didn't even care. He gave up his fancy touch-screen phone, letting AJ put her number into the contacts.
"For if you can't sleep. Or, if you want to talk, or walk, or both," she smiled at him. "Don't hesitate. You are ridiculous and I hate the way you handled your relationship, but I just don't want to feel so alone anymore, either," she said so quietly, it was almost a whisper. "Everyone knows the person that Phil made me. Kind of a narcissistic bitch. Didn't want to deal with anyone, except him, all the time. So they aren't willing to give me another chance."
He offered her a hug, hoping he could comfort her. AJ looked like she could break down and cry, and he couldn't blame her; from the sounds of it, she had a lot going on...
She accepted his outstretched arms, nestling herself in his strength. Inhaling, Seth got a whiff of her honey and apple scented shampoo, wishing for just a second that he could fall asleep with her in his arms. It was late, and as much as he yearned for a body contorting next to his as they slept, he knew that AJ just wasn't someone that would willingly hop into his hotel room. Lonely as they both clearly were, Seth knew better, even though he wished differently.
That's not how this is going to be, he told himself. This was just an arrangement where they'd complain about their problems to each other. No, he couldn't think of her this way...
Suddenly freezing in his embrace, she looked up at him, mere inches away from his lips. All he had to do was...
"I really enjoyed listening to you, despite what it seems," AJ commented, looking down, once again, at her shoes.
Seth smiled. "Talk to me tonight?"
"Until I fall asleep," she promised, breaking away from him. Seth couldn't understand the connection they seemed to have, and fought to invite her back up to his room...
"Goodnight, AJ," Seth walked her to the floor he'd met her on originally, mindblown that the night had happened at all. Was it a dream? It sure felt like it.
In one final hug, she whispered a quick "thank you" into his ear.
It was nice to know that he had been the reason she wasn't sitting in her hotel room, her thoughts burning at her.
Lord knows his own thoughts were eating him alive.
