CHAPTER 6
-:- There's Many a Slip Twixt Cup and Lip -:-
2016 -:- Present Day
Jasper and I stood outside the front door, unsure of what to expect. We both had thought about running back to the others to avoid the stranger all together, but truth be told, we were tired of running. This was our home now, and we would meet whoever it was head on.
Who do you think it is? A vampire? Can you hear their thoughts?
"No, there's nothing yet. More than likely it's one of us. Who else would know we're here? A vampire could easily come across our scent, leading them here."
Jasper's mind briefly wandered to thoughts of people surviving in our house after we had left. "I don't like this. It doesn't feel right. How does someone just happen to show up four days after we get here. Vampire or human?" Maybe someone has been living here?
"I don't like it either, but from the state of the house when we arrived, it didn't look like anyone had been here in years. Besides, we would have known, we would have smelled the. The house has been empty." We could hear the rumbling of a vehicle as it turned off the main road onto our lane. "It doesn't look like we have much of a choice now, does it? Whoever it is, I'm sure it's no coincidence. They know we're here."
A vehicle? Not many people have vehicles. He looked at me—expecting answers. Anything yet?
My brow was furrowed in concentration as I tried to listen both with my ears and my mind.
"That's impossible," I whispered more to myself than to Jasper.
"What? Whoa, you're about to bust out of your skin. What is it?"
"I know that sound. But it—it can't be right."
Jasper looked at me with confusion. I knew my emotions were running rampant, but that would be expected with the sound coming up the lane.
"I'd know that sound anywhere. It's the Chevy. That's Bella's truck."
Jasper grabbed me just as I started to run after the sound of the engine that was all too familiar to me—calling me.
"Stop!" His arms grabbed me in a tight hold and I struggled to break free. "You don't know who it is. It could be anyone. We need to wait for the others."
"Let go."
"You can wrestle me to the ground, brother, but I'm not letting you go."
"I'm not going to say it again. Let. Me. Go."
The anger rolling off me was not helping my situation—it was only fuelling Jasper as well. He held me in a death grip, refusing to let up. The rumbling in my chest was fierce, warning him to back off and that I was about to turn on him like a vicious savage. I flashed my teeth and growled, proving I wasn't kidding. Didn't he understand that I needed to go? I needed to see with my own eyes who was driving that truck. I couldn't wait.
"I'll give you to the count of three. To. Take. Your. Hands. Off. Me." I spoke through clenched teeth.
"It isn't going to happen." Jasper's voice was just as strained with the effort it was taking to hold me back.
I pushed my head away from him, teeth bared, getting ready to strike, just as two large hands grabbed me and pulled me from him.
"Edward! What are you doing?" Carlisle's voice rang through my red-hazed thoughts. I shook my head trying to clear it as Emmett gripped me tighter while the others looked on. Esme's face was filled with consternation and Carlisle just looked disappointed.
"What is this about?" What has gotten into you?
I looked over at Jasper who held Alice in his arms, enraged that he had the audacity to hold me back, when he knew exactly what that sound could possibly mean. The panic took hold of me as I struggled to break free of Emmett's grip. Jasper's face was filled with sympathy, and I felt him try to ease my torment.
"It's okay, Carlisle. We're okay. Edward and I were just having … a disagreement."
"What about?"
"It doesn't matter now because we're about to have company. Edward, can you tell who it is yet?" Jasper slowly moved closer, with his hands in the air, trying to get me under control.
It hadn't gone unnoticed by anyone that Emmett still had a hold of me, and I struggled again to break free from his grip.
"No. Their thoughts aren't making any sense, but it's two of them. Two humans, men." My voice was filled with disappointment and defeat, and Emmett loosened his hold.
I'm sorry, Edward. Jasper didn't need to explain any further, I knew exactly what he was apologizing for.
"Wait. That sounds like Bella's truck," Rosalie spoke up. "How can that be?"
Thoughts of surprise filled my head and then understanding as my family drew their own conclusions about what had transpired between Jasper and me.
Oh, Edward…
I scowled at their pity and was about to reply when my heart shattered for the millionth time in decades. Bella's busted-up, old, red Chevy truck turned the corner and was crawling up the lane. The brakes squeaked just as I remembered and the truck came to a stop. The engine was cut, but no one got out of the vehicle.
My feet were firmly planted, I couldn't move for fear it was a hallucination. Something my sick brain had conjured up to torture me yet again. We all stood still, too shocked for words, except for Carlisle. He walked toward the truck with a huge smile on his face and it wasn't until the driver's side door opened, that I fully understood the reasoning behind his smile. Charlie Swan. An extremely weathered and older Charlie Swan, but Charlie Swan nonetheless stepped from the cab of the truck. The last ten years had not been kind to him.
His hair was prematurely gray, and the lines in his face were deep from years of hardship and worry. His body was lean and sinewy, from what could most likely be attributed to hard, physical labor. He looked as if he had aged at least twenty-five years, but, he was alive. That spark of hope reignited in my body, for just a split second, right before I heard his thoughts loud and clear.
Is she here? Is she with them? He was desperately scanning each of our faces in recognition and I saw his look of disappointment when he counted only seven faces, which only compounded my own disappointment. He was looking for Bella, which meant, she was not with him. The realization caused the guilt to wash over me again. There had always been that little bit of doubt in my mind that hoped, even prayed she was still alive, possibly living with Charlie, that they had survived the insurmountable odds, and lived on, even if it was in the confines of my own mind. Seeing Charlie, standing in the flesh before me, shattered my illusion once and for all. She was gone.
"Well, Chief Swan! I see you took our advice after all." Carlisle's voice rang out in delight as he walked toward him extending his hand.
"H-how can—Carlisle, it is you!" He took Carlisle's hand and shook it ardently. His thoughts were slightly confused and overwhelmed by our appearances. To him we looked exactly the same as the last time we had seen him, over ten years ago. Impossible. Then again after what I've seen, I guess nothing is impossible.
"You have no idea how good it is to see you, Charlie." Carlisle slapped him on the back leading him toward the rest of us, trying to make the man feel at ease.
Edward, there's no going back now. I'm sure Charlie is full of questions. We need to make him feel as comfortable as possible. Perhaps you can ask Jasper to help out.
I gave a slight nod of my head and sidled toward Jasper and Alice, quietly relaying the message only they could hear. Immediately, I could feel the effects of Jasper's talent.
"I think we have a lot to catch up on." Carlisle chuckled. "How did you know we were here?"
It was at that moment, the passenger door opened and a young man around the age of twenty-five, with dark skin and long black hair, stepped forward hesitantly.
"Well, for years now, we've been monitoring the radios. We communicate with other Districts on a regular basis, and then four days ago, Seth, my son," Charlie nodded his head toward the man who had just stepped out of the truck, "picked up on an odd transmission. I recognized the name 'Emmett'— it's not a name you hear too often— and remembered you had a boy by that name. I couldn't be sure it was all of you, but I thought I should come check it out."
"See! I told you to stick to the handles! You never know who's listening," Emmett exclaimed triumphantly, which earned him another cuff to the head from Rosalie.
"Please forgive our son." Esme had stepped forward and was standing next to Carlisle. "So, this is your son?" she asked just as surprised as the rest of us.
"Yes, this is Seth. Seth, this is Esme and Dr. Carlisle Cullen and their, er, children." The young man gave a slight nod of his head toward us, smiling cautiously. His thoughts were curious about us, but nothing out of the ordinary.
"It seems we have a lot to catch up on, won't you come in?" Esme smiled warmly.
"Ah, yes, thank you," he said as he ran his hand over his mouth, rubbing that same moustache I remembered him for, all the while laughing incredulously. "I guess we do."
Esme stepped toward Charlie with certainty and Seth's body became rigid as he took a reflexive step closer to Charlie. His thoughts betrayed nothing, it was almost as if it was instinctual, but he quickly relaxed once he saw Esme's intention, but he never took his eyes off of her.
"It's so good to see you again, Charlie," she said, as she hugged him.
As we walked toward the house, Esme continued with the introductions. Charlie had never properly met the rest of the family, and he was extremely curious about Emmett and his size. He was comparing the size of his son and the other boys that came from the Quileute reservation. He chuckled to himself, wondering if it had been something in the water so many years ago.
So the Quileute's did manage to survive,I thought to myself. Carlisle will be interested to know that bit of information.
When Esme got to Alice, Charlie couldn't contain his excitement, he wrapped her up in his arms squeezing her tightly and whispered, "Thank you."
She giggled in return and told him how happy she was to see him. She always had a soft spot for the Chief of Police and I could tell that her feelings were reciprocated. He set her down and placed his hands on her shoulders, sharing the same look of remorse and understanding of what they both had lost. I briefly wondered what Charlie had to be remorseful for, it was my fault Bella was gone, not his.
We made our way into the house, and Charlie and Seth were astounded with what we had done with the place. The house was almost as impressive as it was prior to the day we left Forks. Seth's thoughts were wild with excitement at seeing Emmett's corner of indulgence. He had all of his electronics proudly on display. His PlayStation, along with his games, DVD's, CD's, Stereo, flat screen TV, you name it, Emmett still had it all from 2006.
Carlisle and Esme led them to the living room, gesturing to take a seat on the leather sofa, and the rest of us gathered around the room finding a space anywhere we could.
"This is amazing. It's like you never left…" Charlie cleared his throat.
"I guess you could say we were more than a little prepared," Esme said, putting her arm around Alice.
Charlie fidgeted with the collar of his shirt, as he cleared his throat again. His clothes were relatively clean, but definitely worn from the years of harsh conditions he must have endured. He was clearly uncomfortable, and feeling out of place sitting amongst all of Esme's fine things. It was an extremely awkward silence; the kind where there is so much to say, but no one had any idea of where to start.
Somebody say something.
"Perhaps you would like something to drink?" Thank, God, for Esme.
"Yes, thank you. That would be great."
Rosalie's thoughts were all too predictable as she and Emmett left the room to get some canned drinks we had stored out back for trading with the Districts.
Well that wasn't awkward. What the hell are we supposed to do now? We can't exactly hide what we are anymore. I am not moving again. This is home. You hear me, Edward? She glared at me as she and Emmett returned carrying two glasses of amber colored liquid.
Seth's eyes were alight with astonishment. "Apple juice! You've got to be kidding me! Where did you get this? We ran out of apple juice about six years ago. All we have now is old cider from the apples we manage to gather. Don't get me wrong, cider is great, but this stuff, wow!" All his uncertainty toward us was thrown out the window as soon as Rosalie handed him his glass.
I was beginning to like this kid. His enthusiasm was obviously catching as Jasper reigned in his delight and it was quite refreshing after all these years.
"Don't get too used to it, Seth. If they continue to spoil us like this, we might never leave, and the others will send a search party and before long they'll be raiding your stuff and imposing on your hospitality too." Charlie grinned widely at the glass. "Thank you, Rosalie." None of us really understood what they were so happy about, the stuff smelled foul.
"So there are others?" Carlisle asked.
"Yes." Charlie nodded taking a sip from the glass. "Mmm…" He closed his eyes and his thoughts were nothing but pleasant. "This is very generous of you, thank you. I can't tell you how good that tastes."
"Well, perhaps I could interest you in something a little stronger? If you'll excuse me for a second." Edward, this may help to take off the edge.
Carlisle had gone for the box of scotch we had been saving to trade with one of the Districts that was rather fond of the drink. He was gone but a few seconds, and returned holding a bottle of Johnnie Walker. That was one of the benefits of not having to eat or drink your own supplies, they lasted a lot longer than the human's supplies. We still managed to have quite a few stores of food stashed all over the country, ready to trade for fuel or help wherever it was needed.
"It's not the best, but I think it will do the job."
Charlie's eyes widened in surprise and he was completely taken aback at Carlisle's gesture. "Oh, thank you, but we can't possibly. You save that for yourselves, it's too much."
"Well, I think this is a cause for a celebration. In this day and age, it's not often you meet up with dear friends, and from the looks of things, Charlie, you and Seth deserve a few simple pleasures."
"Thank you, but I don't deserve it," he finished quietly, lowering his head in what I thought was shame. I looked to Jasper for confirmation.
He's filled with guilt, Edward. It's almost on par with yours.
"Charlie, that's bullshit and you know it."
"Watch your mouth, son," Charlie scolded Seth, both of them setting their glasses down on the coffee table, squaring off.
The rest of us looked on, curious at their exchange. I could feel Jasper working his magic on the room, hoping to ease Charlie and Seth a little bit. Charlie glanced up, looking around the room. He felt something was different, strange. His suspicions of us, that we were something other than human, were surfacing again. I knew we would have to address this soon, but there were other things to discuss first. Luckily, Seth spoke before he could come to any clear conclusions.
"I'm sorry, but enough's enough! I for one have never tasted Scotch, so I would love a glass and Charlie will too." He glared at Charlie waiting for him to object. "He's been blaming himself for years." Seth looked to each of us before turning back to Charlie. "It's not your fault. You saved us, all of us. Why can't you accept that you're a hero in all of this, dad?"
Because I couldn't save the one person that mattered the most.
And there it was. Charlie's accusation hit me with full force. I let out a huge breath.
"Charlie, it was my fault, not yours," I whispered. "How can you feel responsible?"
"Still reading minds, kid?"
I nodded and saw from the corner of my eye, Seth's mouth drop open in confusion.
"Well, then you would know that it was my fault."
I watched as he replayed the scene in his mind from the day Carlisle, Esme and I left his house. It was like I was watching a movie play through his eyes.
After we had left, he scrutinized over our conversation for a few hours and then the rational side of Charlie's brain kicked in. He had come to the conclusion that we were certifiable and he started to panic for his daughter's safety. He wasn't ready to accept the idea that I could read minds, but regardless, he knew that we had the resources to find Bella if we really wanted to. He picked up the phone and called Renee in Baltimore, warning her that I was probably looking for Bella and would be on their doorstep soon. He told her he didn't want any of the Cullens back in Bella's life and she agreed.
Renee and Phil didn't even think twice, they packed up and told Bella they were taking her on a vacation. Phil had some time in between his coaching jobs, and they told her they wanted to take her away to clear her mind, get a new perspective on things. Bella had not been going to school since she left Forks—she wasn't in any frame of mind to do so and Renee had been homeschooling her the best that she could. So it wasn't a problem to pack up and leave at a moment's notice.
Renee had assured Charlie she wouldn't let any one of us near her daughter, and she would call once they knew where they were going. They left Baltimore within hours of Charlie's phone call, and he never heard from them again.
"It's my fault, I'm so sorry, Edward. If—I—if I hadn't interfered. If I had just trusted you…"
I stood, breathing deeply, mustering up all of my courage to stop myself from reaching across the glass coffee table and snapping his neck. It was for just a split second, and only my family had noticed as I heard them all scream silently at me. I ran from the room as quickly as I possibly could without drawing too much attention to my speed. If I had stayed, I was fairly sure my control would have wavered. So I did the only thing I could think of, and I ran.
My family's cries invaded my head, as they begged me to come back. They were completely confused by my reaction, not having heard anything I had learned from Charlie. At this moment, I wished they could have read my thoughts and know that I didn't want anyone to follow me. I needed some time to be alone to process Charlie's words. We had been so close!
The most strangled and deafening cry tore through my chest, and the forest grew silent around me as I screamed. I continued to run, not wanting to stop for anything. I knew Charlie had never liked me, I just never knew the extent of that hatred. It was nothing less than I deserved. I was a monster, and even if Bella had never come to realize that, her father sure did. I slammed my hand against an old decaying tree trunk and it came crashing down next to me. It felt good— it was exactly what I needed. I continued slamming into trees, clearing a path of destruction as I ran. I wished I could feel the physical pain behind it, even though I knew that was not possible. I just wanted a release from the emotional pain that scarred me all of these years.
I woke up from my violent haze and became fully conscious of where I was. It was instinct that had stopped me from crossing the line, but I had no more desire to live, so my instincts could go to hell for all intents and purposes. I slowly walked up to the imaginary border that stretched along the treaty boundary. I had no idea if the wolves were still around since the days of Ephraim Black, but I would take my chances. With one deliberate stride, I broke the treaty we had established more than eighty years ago hoping the legend of the wolf was still as present as ever and my death would be quick. I would forgo the painless part of that saying, if someone or something would just end my life. I had been so close…
2006 -:- Past Memories
WE HAD LEFT CHARLIE'S with such hope in our hearts that we would be sure to find Bella. Carlisle was on the phone with Emmett before we had even pulled out of the driveway. The others were going to continue with the preparations and once we had gotten to Bella, the plan was to meet back at the house in Forks. This seemed like the best place to be when the bombs hit, at least the most familiar and I knew Bella would want to be with her father. Hopefully, we could convince Renee and Phil to come along with us. That, or force them to come with us, which I was not above doing at this point.
Alice's visions were coming in flashes stronger than before, and were much more definite. She had started to see landmarks from around the world being incinerated before her eyes. The most distinct being Big Ben, the Kremlin and more importantly Capitol Hill. If Bella was in Baltimore, she was in a hot zone and we needed to get to her soon. We still had no idea when this was going to take place, and everything became that much more urgent.
We had planned on flying to Baltimore, but the only fight the three of us could get on, was a flight leaving at ten later that evening and it wouldn't arrive until nine-thirty, Monday morning, local time. I had already wasted twenty-four hours in Forks waiting, I wasn't about to waste another minute. With that kind of delay, we were fairly close to the twenty-one hours it would take to drive to Baltimore, at vampire speed of course. Flying, also would have meant being out of contact with the rest of the family for the duration of the flight, and we couldn't risk that.
So I pushed the Volvo to its limits as we raced across the country toward the only thing that mattered to me. At least by driving, Carlisle and Esme were able to conduct all the business that needed to be taken care of to prepare for what was coming. They had been constantly on their phones acquiring supplies for the underground storage facilities Jasper had managed to purchase in the last thirty-six hours. It still amazed me what could be done with unlimited resources.
Carlisle had made numerous contacts over the years, and was fairly discreet in his transactions. He was careful never to conduct all of his business with one supplier to avoid suspicion. I could tell things were laying heavily on his mind. He was in constant turmoil of whether or not he should be warning each of these people he had been in contact with about what was coming.
Every now and then, he would stop and take a break from it all and seek out my conversation. We spent an hour here and there debating as to what should be done. Carlisle, always the compassionate soul, wanted to help them all. I only had one human that I wanted to help and that was already proving to be extremely difficult. I told him he was absurd if he thought warning people would help them in any way. It would only cause panic and chaos, and maybe I was being selfish, but I needed to find Bella before any of that happened. I couldn't risk her life like that. It would make it almost impossible to find her if that kind of anarchy were to erupt, not to mention the Volturi's reaction to our revelations.
It was just before three in the morning and we were approaching the outskirts of Columbus. We had been vigilant in our efforts to get there as quickly as possible and were making incredible time. Carlisle had just ended his call with Rosalie, discussing how far they had gotten with all the preparations in the Midwest. The car was silent, none of us wishing to discuss the possibility of not finding Bella. I had been trying my best to ignore Esme's thoughts when they wandered from the task at hand. They were filled with hopeful images of the eight of us, together as a family. A 'Norman Rockwell' type painting that disturbed me quite a bit. For one, with whatever was coming, that image was more than likely never going to happen and secondly, I knew Esme was imagining Bella like one of us, and I was still a bit bothered by that. I was staring out the windshield, trying to concentrate on the road and not Esme, when Carlisle's phone pierced the silence of the night. Alice.
"She's not there!" I heard her frantic voice on the other end.
"Alice? What do you mean?" Carlisle asked, and despite his soothing voice, the panic started to build in me so I pulled on to the shoulder of the highway.
"She's not there! She's not there!" she yelled at Carlisle.
"Alice, honey, you need to calm down and explain to me what you saw."
"I just know! I don't know how I know. I just know she isn't there! I feel it."
"What do you mean, feel it?" I asked completely confused by her words. "You aren't making any sense, Alice. Did you have a vision? Is Jasper with you?"
We could hear the phone change hands as Jasper got on the line.
"She's been saying this for about a half an hour now. I came upstairs to get the last of our stuff, and she was curled up in the corner of the empty room rocking back and forth just saying 'she's not there,' over and over. I couldn't snap her out of it. At least not until I started dialing your number, and then she came to life telling me it wasn't a vision but a feeling that Bella wasn't in Baltimore anymore. I don't know, Carlisle, I've never seen her like this." Jasper's voice was rife with worry and he let out a huge breath. "I don't know what to do."
"Jasper, you need to keep her calm. I know you are trying, but it is very important to keep her as calm as possible. Has she seen anything else?"
"No. Not apart from the flashes. They are still coming because I can feel her pain when they do. This feeling she's been describing is something new."
"Okay, I think you two should join us. We will try to find out what happened to Bella. We'll track down Renee and Phil if we can, and hopefully they will tell us where she is. How long will it take you to get to Baltimore?"
"A few hours."
"We'll probably get there before you, so if we move on, we'll keep in contact and you can follow us. Son, you have to keep her calm."
"I understand, thank you, Carlisle. I just…" I had never heard Jasper so shaken, he was always so composed. It was completely unsettling to know that Alice and Jasper were experiencing so much suffering, and we weren't there to help them.
"I know. We'll wait for you if we can." Carlisle ended the call and turned to me from the passenger seat. "Edward, I don't know what this means, but I think we are running out of time. Let's get to the hotel. "
"Carlisle, Jasper and Alice need you. You should be with them," I stated sheepishly. I was selfishly taking Carlisle away from them, and they needed him more than I did.
"One thing at a time. Just get to the hotel as quick as you can. Jasper's on his way and besides, there's nothing we can do for them right now," he answered as the consummate professional he was, instead of the father his thoughts betrayed him as. He was torn between what was happening with Alice and helping me, but he was right, we had to tackle one thing at a time.
I saw Esme's face drop as she turned to look out the darkened window. Her hand instinctively went to her mouth, as I watched her reflection in the glass, the 'Norman Rockwell' painting quickly slipping from her mind. Her greatest fear had returned. Her family was falling apart right before her eyes and she was helpless all over again.
Carlisle effortlessly moved to the back seat and reached across the seat gathering her in his arms, and whispered into her hair, "Darling, they'll be all right. We'll all be together soon. You must have faith."
Her thoughts were fraught with worry for all of us, Emmett and Rosalie, Jasper and Alice and of course Bella. She truly did think of her as a daughter, and she would not be at peace until we were all together again. My own thoughts strayed briefly away from Bella as I contemplated Carlisle's words. Did I have enough faith to believe that we would all survive this? What was to become of us all? I didn't want to think of what would happen to any of us if we lost just one member of our family … catastrophic. I pushed the Volvo to its max as I raced against the dwindling time that pressed upon us.
.
FROM WHAT WE COULD tell from the investigating we had done on the long drive to Baltimore, was that Phil had broken his leg, and was no longer playing ball. He had accepted a coaching job in Baltimore and Renee and Phil were living in a hotel until they could sell their place in Phoenix.
We had made it to the hotel at first light, luckily it was a cloudy day, so we were free to move around in the daylight, and we discovered Alice had been right. The 'Dwyer's' had checked out of the hotel yesterday early evening, and had left no forwarding address. Immediately, I made a phone call to Charlie, only to get his answering machine, but I left him a message desperately pleading for Bella's whereabouts. Carlisle made numerous phone calls to the Forks Police Station, hoping to find Charlie there, but Chief Swan was always 'occupied' or 'out of the station' each time he rang. It had been four days since Alice's first vision, and we were right back to square one. I was nowhere closer to Bella
"What are you going to do?"
"The only thing I can possibly do at this point. I'm going to Phoenix. If Renee is selling the house, she has to have a lawyer and a real estate agent. I can track them down and they should know where they are, or at least how to contact them. It's my only option if Charlie won't return my calls."
"We should fly this time. It'll be faster."
"I'm going alone. Right now, Alice needs you the most. You've done more than enough. I can't expect any more from either of you. There is too much to do and I can't possibly take you away from that. Alice's visions are getting stronger and from the sounds of it, she's going to need help."
Esme looked a little relieved, but torn as well. Her thoughts were with me, even though in her heart, she needed to see Jasper and Alice. She'd been relatively silent since Jasper's call.
I grabbed her hand, squeezing gently. "I'll be fine," I whispered.
"You find her and head straight to Forks," Carlisle said. "We'll meet you there as soon as we can." You call us if you need anything.
"I will. You sure you'll be okay if I leave you here? I don't want to leave you stranded."
Carlisle nodded, trying his best to reassure me. "Esme and I will wait for Jasper, and we'll take the vehicles to Forks. We still have to acquire the fuel and finish up what we can, and I'm sure Rosalie and Emmett will need our help as well."
"I truly am sorry to be leaving you like this. I wish I could be of more help." I squeezed Esme's hand again and she smiled in return.
"Edward, you can help Esme and the rest of us by finding Bella, that's the most important thing right now." And I think it's time I made a call to Aro…His thoughts trailed off.
"Do you think that's wise?" The look he gave me clearly meant that he had no intention of sharing the last bit of his thoughts with me. He didn't want to burden me or worse, make me angry. He knew my feelings about contacting the Volturi.
"I don't think I have a choice in the matter anymore. They have a right to know and they need to make the decision as to how we approach the humans with this information. We can't leave them unprepared. I'll never forgive myself."
I was adamantly against it, but I would still respect his decision if he felt it was for the best. I trusted him completely. I knew exactly the reasoning behind Carlisle's thoughts, but it didn't mean that it terrified me any less. Yes, we had to do what we could to warn as many people as possible, but how do you do that without creating widespread pandemonium? It was simple. You didn't. I had a small window to find Bella and get back to Forks before any of this happened. For a vampire who had eternity, I was very quickly running out of time.