After.
Chapter Three: Dark Star
Joker opened his eyes, receiving a jolt of panic at his surroundings. Instead of the underside of Donnelly's bunk, or the darkness of being face-down in his pillow...there was a ceiling. He held perfectly still as his mind sorted out the details. The smell of antiseptic drifted through his nostrils, causing the pilot to cringe.
"Jeff," Chakwas' voice greeted from beside him. Slowly, his green eyes slid to the right – revealing the med bay of the SR-2.
"Chakwas...how the hell did I get here?"
"Shepard defeated Saren and the Collectors, and you don't think she has the capacity to safely move someone?" her voice amused, as she tapped upon a data-pad.
"Right...just normally moving someone would wake them up."
"It's Shepard."
"Did she drug me?"
"She said she knocked you out with some sedatives that would hold you for movement without disturbing you. What disturbs me, however, is how she got her hands on those sedatives..." Chakwas' voice drifted into thought, as Joker frowned. The water.
"Great...getting drugged by my Commander."
"You're free to go whenever you feel fit, Jeff. You're going to have to be on crutches for awhile to allow the bone to heal properly."
Joker slowly nodded, rubbing his eyes, before locating his hat and grabbing the crutches.
"Thanks for patching me up," he nodded, "I'll try not treat the lift like a slip-and-slide."
"Especially when there are long hallways that would work better," Chakwas nodded with a straight face, before turning to the other patients within the med bay.
Carefully propping himself up on the crutches, the pilot made his way out of the door and headed straight for the mess hall – where a good portion of the crew was already eating breakfast.
Gardner offered him a tray, before staring down at his crutches – realizing the man didn't have a hand to grab them with.
"Keelah, Joker, what did you do?" Tali asked, grabbing the tray for the pilot – setting it down at the end of the nearest table.
"Thanks Tali," he smiled, carefully setting himself in front of the food she had placed upon the table. The quarian helped Joker lean the crutches on the edge of the table, before sitting across from him.
"I slipped in something in the lift," he shrugged, digging around the decent tasting meal in front of him, "Real exciting stuff."
"What did you slip in?"
"Honestly I'm not sure. I'm guessing someone spilled some water. Didn't smell like puke or blood," he shrugged, placing a sausage in his mouth in thought.
"To think someone would be that inconsiderate," Tali fumed – her three-fingers hands balling up.
"Well to most, letting a bit of water drip onto the ground isn't the biggest deal. It's not like people are constantly thinking, 'oh better mop that up so Joker doesn't fall!'" the pilot made motions with his hands – his fork spinning between his fingers.
"On the Flotilla, it was always normal to take responsibility for our actions," she nodded slightly, "After all this time, your race still confuses me."
"They confuse me too," Joker smiled, glancing down at his food.
"I don't understand."
"I generally don't understand my own people," he shrugged, "Though I'm not the one sitting in the mess hall wearing an environmental suit," he teased, sliding more food into his mouth.
"I'm technically eating..." she gestured to the front of her helmet.
"It's fine – I understand," he smiled, before his omni-tool beeped. His wrist glowed orange as he activated the device and checked his messages.
"Oh no. The Reapers have won. Sorry. Couldn't avoid it.
-Gaz"
Joker narrowed his eyes at the message – his still slightly drugged mind not connecting the dots immediately. Plus the use of the Commander's first name.
"EDI?" Joker asked, causing the holograph to appear just behind Tali.
"What do you require, Jeff?"
Tali flinched slightly at the voice – still uncomfortable with the ship being controlled by AI.
"ETA to Citadel?"
"Twenty minutes, Jeff."
–
Shepard stared at herself in the mirror – nerves biting at the back of her mind. She had defeated Saren and exterminated the Collectors – and even a baby Reaper. Yet meeting Kaidan in the Dark Star actually caused her pause. The nightclub was trying to take a higher-end approach – rather than the normal blaring beats and flailing commoners. Kaidan's last message had seemed excited, but told her to wear...a dress.
The woman stood in the bathroom, constantly pulling at every end of the dress. Only moments before she had reported the discovery to her favorite pilot, who had replied with a simple, "Give 'em hell, Commander," reply. She was idly disappointed that he hadn't just played along. It would have been a nice diversion.
"We've arrived at the Citadel, Commander," Joker's voice reported over the speakers in her room.
"Excellent. Inform the crew they have shore leave for the next forty-eight hours," Shepard replied, as she carefully slid the wet-eyeliner brush across her top lid.
"Aye-aye, Commander."
"That includes you Joker," she smirked to herself – transferring the application tool to her other lid.
"Noted, Commander," he laughed – causing Shepard's smile to widen slightly.
Once her simple makeup was done, she paused and stared at her own reflection. Her auburn hair was pinned back – allowing a few strands of hair to remain by her eyes, as the rest curled behind her ears. Gaz's makeup was normally simple and only acted as a strange self-confidence booster. Today, however, she had actually spent time on each aspect – making it cleaner and more elegant. The woman studied herself in the mirror carefully – only pausing to remove a bit of eye-shadow from her freckled cheek.
"EDI – remaining life-signs on the Normandy?" she asked, continuing to study her own appearance.
"Most crew have already left for shore leave, Commander. The remaining crew is currently passing through the airlock."
"Eager," Shepard whispered under her breath, before she turned toward the exit of her room. At least she wouldn't have to explain why she was dressed up to any of the crew as she exited the Normandy.
–
"Someone asked the bartender what rumors are in the area! Everyone do a shot!"
Joker pulled back the small glass of green liquid – feeling it instantly burn his esophagus. Beside him, Donnelly laughed and slammed his own glass down.
When Shepard had announced shore leave, Donnelly, Daniels, Patel, and Hadley had dragged Joker into the Dark Star for a drink. They were all caught off-guard at how the club had gone from flashing lights to a more 'up-end' sort of place. However, they still catered to the crew's needs. Lots and lots of alcohol.
"We are all going to get alcohol poisoning..." Patel whispered, propping her head up upon her hands. She was part of the 'B-crew' which Joker had hardly seen before. Apparently she was actually the person who took over for Chakwas when the doctor needed sleep. He'd have to report his findings to Shepard.
"That's the fun of a drinking game!" Donnelly laughed, clearly enjoying himself. Beside him, Daniels shook her head.
"I wonder why people think the bartenders know everything. All they do is pour drinks and try to keep people from puking on the floor. I don't get it."
"Ah Gabby, it's a commonplace on Earth for bartenders to know everything," Donnelly smirked, clearly already feeling the alcohol.
"I know Kenneth," her voice slightly annoyed, "I was just wondering where it started."
"No wondering. Oh – someone asked again! Drink!" cheered Hadley – a man who was one of the navigators aboard the ship.
Joker smiled, shaking his head. This was the most fun he had in a long while. Hell – he didn't even know he needed a night out until they invited him. He adjusted the foot that was propped up on a chair beside his table – his green eyes scanning the room slightly.
A woman entered the club – walking a bit too strongly for someone in heels. The outfit simply looked wrong on the woman – though not necessarily bad. It wasn't until she glanced toward him, did Joker realize it was his Commander.
"Check out our Commanding Officer," Joker smiled, nudging Donnelly beside him.
"She should fight every battle in that little dress," he laughed, lightly punching Joker in the shoulder.
Shepard continued walking, appearing a bit embarrassed that anyone had seen her. She took a seat at an empty table, appearing to tell off some turian who had already approached her.
"I wonder who she's meetin'?" Donnelly asked, causing Daniels to peek over at Shepard as well.
"I have some idea," Gabby smiled, settling back into her seat, as a dark-haired man approached Shepard's table.
Joker frowned. He knew that awkward haircut anywhere. It was Kaidan.
–
AN: SHEPARD IN A DRESS. THE REAPERS WON...unless you count the DLC Mission with Kasumi. Anyway, here's another addition to my story. I have a confession to make...I might have sat down for a day or two and just started writing. I currently have a doc filled with 24,000ish words that isn't done yet (oops) and realized I should start splitting it into chapters and uploading it somewhere. Yeah. Oh a different note – let's hope Shepard and Kaidan's meeting goes better than Horizon.
Rated M for: Language, future sexual situations, future violence, and so I can have freedom without fear of scarring a teen for life.
Oh – and I don't own anything ever.