After.
Chapter Fifteen: Senses
Gaz's eyes snapped open, causing a jolt of feelings to come crashing down upon the Commander. Since her 'resurrection,' there had been an issue of her senses 'waking up'. Every time the woman awoke, everything was heightened for about ten seconds. Her ears could pick up every bubble that the filter added to her fish tank. The slight sound of the water rushing around the top of the aquarium. The very quiet hum the Normandy constantly made. She could smell the toothpaste lid she hadn't slid on properly last night. The slightly ajar shampoo cap within the bathroom. The subtle minty residue on her toothbrush. She could taste everything she ate over the last day, causing an unpleasant ache in her stomach. Her light eyes studied the space-window that lay just above her bed. She felt as if she could count every star.
After several months of experiencing this phenomena, she quickly learned to not move a singular muscle during this unpleasant jolt in her senses. With every sent maxed out, she would often find herself sick to her stomach – making the mission that day quite unpleasant. If she could manage to avoid the 'feel' aspect, she would be okay. Of course she could feel the soft sheets against her exposed feet and arms – but that was subtle enough to not push her over the edge.
Exhaling, she relaxed as the episode passed – her eyes scanning the room. Feeling a strange weight on her pillow – she glanced up. Her mouth instantly curled into a smile, seeing her new kitten curled happily on the top of her pillow. Apparently he preferred the people-bed over his kitty-bed. Shepard had no problem with this. Reaching her hand slowly out of the covers, she stroked the nameless kitten, causing it to grunt slightly in its sleep.
Carefully pulling herself into a sitting position, Shepard glanced over at the couch. Her evening had been...unexpected. It was her first night free of the medical bay, and she had ended up having a...well it was a breakdown. She had thrown the entire thing at Joker – the poor guy. The level of guilt she felt for simply letting him see her like that was nearly worse than the initial emotions, themselves.
Yet, he had comforted her. A smile pulled at Gaz's lips as she recalled his reaction to it all. Telling a joke. Forcing her mind to picture Mordin setting Kaidan on fire with his mind. The still groggy woman laughed slightly on her bed, as she rubbed her eyes with the backs of her hands.
'I can't believe I kissed Joker...' she thought with a smile, shooting the kitten a side-glance. It had started purring for no apparent reason. Damn that thing was the prefect present.
The evening had started with tears, but ended so well. Her second kiss with Joker was...well, for someone who had been a virgin until a short while ago, he had managed to outdo most she had kissed. Especially Kaidan. That man was all tongue. And drool. There were a few times when she had kissed Kaidan, where she actually had to pull back, since he had managed to set off her gag-reflex. The woman laughed silently on her bed, pulling her sheets closer to her body as she glanced over to her fish-tank.
But with Joker...it was just simple. He was her best friend.
Growing up, Shepard had always had the issue of being a 'clingy friend'. Since she didn't have any family of her own, she often held her friends to an extremely high regard. They were her family. Sadly, very few ever repaid the fondness for her. The sheer amount of times she had bent over backwards to help out a friend was astonishing. However – few ever would lift a damn finger for her. Through her teen years, there were long stretches of time where Shepard had never felt more alone. Those damn kids stabbing her in the back. Once or twice that wasn't a metaphor.
Kaidan was no better than those 'friends' who used her.
With a heavy sigh, Shepard got out of bed, noticing her personal console beeping at her.
"!
-Joker"
Shepard smiled, quickly typing a reply.
"?
-Gaz"
After a moment, the console alerted her to a new message.
":D
-Joker"
No, it didn't make any real sense, but it still amused her. Two exclamation points. A smiley face. That summed up the night nicely. After their kiss, they talked for a little while – Shepard leaning on Joker's shoulder – before they both admitted to being tired and parted ways. It wasn't rushed. It wasn't forced. Just simple.
–
"It's the curse of an L2, Kaidan," Chakwas shook her head, fetching migraine medication, as the new Spectre leaned his head on his hands. The bright lights of the SR-2's medical bay seemed to be mocking him. If he opened his eyes, it felt as if he was staring straight into Earth's sun. His stomach would curl further – his head would shriek in pain. It had been awhile since his last migraine. Some part of Kaidan figured his body had finally stopped somewhat rejecting the implant within the back of his skull, and would just play nice.
Then he woke up this morning and nearly ruined Miranda's sheets. Well...more than he had the previous night.
He tried to just shower the nausea off, but ended up not even making it to the shower before he was face-down in a toilet. Luckily the two were in the same room. Unluckily, Joker was just leaving from his morning shower. The look that the pilot had given him was almost...smug? Kaidan had simply brushed it off at the time – considering he was a bit preoccupied; but that didn't stop the thought from floating around his head.
'Did he tell Shepard?' he wondered, nearly opening his eyes at the thought.
"Take a deep breath in when...you know the drill, Kaidan," Chakwas' voice broke his train of thought, causing the man to nod slightly.
With a quick intake of air, the doctor injected the medicine into his neck. The man hardly flinched. Back in the real Normandy days, he'd have one of those shots nearly every-other-day.
Patting the spot on his neck, Chakwas placed a hand on Kaidan's shoulder – urging him to lie down.
"Sadly this medication hasn't gotten any better. Just lay there for about ten minutes, then you won't have a problem for the next day or so."
"Thank you, doctor," Kaidan breathed, as his omni-tool beeped.
"Would you like me to read that to you Kaidan? No one else is around," Chakwas offered, standing beside the bed.
"It could be an official message from the Council or from the Alliance."
"Want me to just tell you who the sender is?"
"Please," Kaidan lifted his arm, blindly putting in his passcode, before he felt Chakwas' gentle touch take his wrist.
"It's from Jeff."
"Jeff?"
"Jeff Moreau. Joker?"
Kaidan frowned, crossing one arm over his eyes, "Read it...I guess."
There was a long pause.
"Chakwas?"
"It says, 'I hope your morning sickness is doing better. Use a condom next time.
-Joker.'"
Kaidan rolled his lips in, feeling a bit of anger burn in the back of his skull.
"Calm down Kaidan," Chakwas suddenly cautioned, "You're going to modify the calibrations on my instruments if you allow your biotics to go unchecked," she cautioned – causing Kaidan to realize he probably was emitting a faint blue glow.
"Sorry, doctor."
"We've both known Jeff for years, Kaidan. He enjoys pushing your buttons," her voice filtered with a bit of concern.
"How much time left before it sets in?"
"Seven minutes."
–
"It is physically impossible for the human male to carry a child or suffer from 'morning sickness,' Jeff," EDI informed Joker, as he quietly laughed in his leather seat.
"It's a joke, EDI. Like how you enjoy seeing humans on their knees."
The memory of her saying that was still etched within his mind. Well – so was the whole 'quickly move through the ship and avoid being eaten by Collectors,' thing.
"But I do enjoy that, Jeff."
Joker stared at the blue holographic sphere to his left, slightly horrified at the words that had just come out of her speakers.
"That was a joke, Jeff."
"We really, really need to work on that humor thing, EDI," Joker frowned, shaking his head.
His omni-tool demanded his attention, causing the man to halt in his maintenance report.
"The kitten is now somehow asleep inside a pillowcase.
-Gaz."
"The small feline has, indeed, fallen asleep inside the Commander's pillow covering, Jeff," EDI confirmed, as Joker pulled up a response window.
"Please stop reading my messages EDI," he frowned, quickly typing a reply.
"Good kitty. Named him yet?
-Joker"
"Spectre Kaidan Alenko is heading for the cockpit, Jeff."
"Shit. Is he doing that angry-strut thing?"
"His heart-rate is accelerated past his normal levels, Jeff."
"Shit. EDI, if he kills me...please call him Dave and go all 2001: A Space Odyssey on him?"
"I won't let him harm you, Dave."
"Again, EDI, we need to work on the humor thi-"
"Joker."
The Helmsman froze, before deciding to act like nothing was out of the ordinary. His hands continued filling in numbers with EDI's help.
"Kaidan? That you?" he idly asked, his voice bored.
"Yeah. Do you have a minute to talk?"
"Kinda busy here, Kaidan. See – I actually have a job on this boat," he snarled his lip slightly as he spoke – aware that the man couldn't see his face.
"I'm serious, Joker."
Raising his hands in a 'I surrender' fashion, Joker turned his chair towards Kaidan, "Fine, fine – I'll play along. What's biting at your panties, Kaidan? Miranda too rough in bed?"
Joker couldn't help himself. He knew he was signing his own death warrant here, but the memory of his Commander breaking down because of the asshole was still very fresh within his mind. Joker did not like people messing with Shepard.
"Ha. Ha. Your nickname is well earned," Kaidan's voice flat, "But please. Can we keep the sarcastic comments and constant attacks gone for just one conversation?"
Joker shot EDI's hologram – who hadn't left his side since Kaidan entered – a side-glance, before shrugging, "Yeah, I guess."
"Did you tell Shepard about me and Miranda?"
"Yes," Joker nodded – his face void of emotion – hands neatly folded on his lap, "Anything else I can do for you?"
"Why...why the hell would you tell her?"
"Why would you keep it from her?" Joker shrugged, keeping his voice neutral, "I don't see what the big deal is. You said you moved on."
"Maybe I'd like to tell her in my own time in my own way? Joker – stop putting your face where it shouldn't be."
"Ha...ah..." a smile spread across Joker's face, as the air distorted above Kaidan's shoulders. This man was not happy.
"Why are you laughing?"
"So many jokes. But – she asked. That's why I told her."
"Asked about me?" Kaidan's voice dropped.
"Actually," Joker smiled, "Miranda."
"Miranda?"
"Yeah. Yesterday when the Commander left the med-bay, she crutched her way over to Miranda's to let her know that she was taking back command. Miranda – who never leaves her room – wasn't there. I saw you two walk by me to go out to dinner or whatever, so I told her what I saw."
"But you didn't tell her what I told you?"
"That you fucked the Cerberus cheerleader? No."
Kaidan raised his hand as if he was about to make a point, but quickly lowered it.
"Wait...when did you see Shepard last night?" Kaidan's eyes narrowed at Joker, "There's no way that she stopped by here before going up to her room."
"Why the hell not? People visit me."
"On the average day, three-point-oh-one people visit the cockpit, other than Jeff," EDI informed.
"Not really helping my point here EDI – but thanks for trying," Joker sighed.
"What aren't you telling me, Joker?" the air above Kaidan reminded Joker of the air under the original Normandy, when she flew close to the ground.
"I don't think you know my middle name, what languages I speak, the nationality of my parents, or what color my boxers are," the pilot ventured, pulling at the bill of his SR-2 hat, "...unless you watched me get dressed while you were puking this morning. Pervert."
"Forget it."
As Kaidan disappeared down the hall, Joker turned back to face his console – continuing his report.
"EDI – can I see last month's report on the left monitor? Some of these numbers seem off."
"I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that."
"Ha. Ha. I just made my life a lot harder with you, didn't I?"
–
AN: For some reason, this is my favorite chapter. The 'SENSE ATTACK' thing Shepard has is a bit of a head-canon for me – which is oddly like a mini-migraine. Also – the kitten is so cute. I DO have a name for it, but you're going to have to wait to hear what it is. Anyway, I'm currently replaying Mass Effect 1 right now, and felt kind of bad for how I'm treating Kaidan in this fanfic – so I let up a bit. Gave him pity points by giving him a really hard migraine – to compliment Shepard's own little episode.
Then we have Joker's part of the chapter. I really, really liked writing that part. EDI and humor is possibly the best thing of all time. Also, if you have never seen 2001: A Space Odyessy, you're probably really confused right now. All you need to know is that HAL is basically AI gone wrong. Also...see the movie. It's a classic.
On a random note, I really feel like I nailed everyone in this chapter.
That came out wrong.
Let me rephrase that.
I really feel like I captured each character quite well in this chapter. I hope you agree.
Oh – AND I LOVE ALL THE COMMENTS AND REVIEWS AND FAVORITES AND STORY ALERT MESSAGES I'M GETTING FROM YOU LOT. It makes me feel really good since I only put this up a few days ago. Keep them coming!
Rated M for: Language, future sexual situations, future violence, and so I can have freedom without fear of scarring a teen for life.
Oh – and I don't own anything ever.