After.

Chapter Sixteen: Perfect

Miranda typed among the silence within her room. Her light eyes moved back and forth across the screen as she wrote – her mouth forming the words as her fingers quickly formed them digitally. It was a report on the last mission she had gone on with Kaidan and Jacob. Normally she got them out of the way directly after – but with her having been in charge over the last month, she hadn't found time. In reality, there wasn't a single reason to write the report. Cerberus had cast her aside – the Illusive Man had disowned her. There wasn't anyone to send this report to – other than local authorities who sometimes liked to know what happened in their area. Normally, she'd simply save it to her computer and move on.

She always did the report, because she had always done them in the past. If she suddenly stopped this routine, she knew the reality of it all would finally hit her – a prospect she had been running from since they just barely escaped the Collector Base. Pausing in her work, she closed her eyes and leaned back in her chair – eyes casting back at her perfectly made bed. Only a few hours ago, she hadn't been alone in this room. For once, that wasn't because Shepard wanted to have one of those 'chats,' or Kelly asking one-too-many-questions. Instead, it was because of Kaidan.

In the beginning, he was just a distraction to Shepard. Miranda had argued against putting his picture within the Commander's quarters – saying it would keep her from concentrating on the mission. Then there was the meeting on Horizon. Miranda hadn't been there – but was listening over Shepard's radio. While his words were sharp, they made perfect sense. She had disappeared for two years and was now working for an organization he saw evil. Honestly, Miranda was a bit disturbed by how the others from Shepard's past had quickly taken her in without question.

After the meeting on Horizon, Miranda had done some investigating on the man in question – honestly impressed by his track record. After that – he was nothing more than an idle picture within Shepard's quarters.

When they had their first shore-leave after the Collector Base mission, he and Shepard went on a date. Miranda had read the messages herself – for she screened all of Shepard's mail. The fact that Shepard had managed to save the galaxy twice, survive death, keep her Spectre status...and still keep all her friends – well it honestly made Miranda a bit jealous. Everything Miranda had 'accomplished' was nothing more than a formula or something that was just given to her. She was grown from perfect cells in a perfect environment. Then she was engineered post-birth to be 'perfect'. From there, she received a perfect education, became a perfect biotic, and somehow still managed to become Daddy's little failure. That's why her 'twin' was born. Her father had decided she wasn't good enough – despite everything being set for her – so he started over. This is what caused Miranda to run – stealing the 'start-over' in the process. Yes, she did want to save the girl – but she also didn't want to be replaced.

Then the Illusive Man found her and made her his own. Every mission she was thrown on was perfectly set for her built-in skills. She never was anything but near the top, really. She spent her younger years in Cerberus actually living with the 'Illusive Man'. In many ways, he was her father. Both for the better and worse. Yes, he took better care of her than the original – but in the end, his intentions were the same. She was a tool.

Then there was Shepard. Earthborn. Grew up in an orphanage then on the streets in a gang. Joined the Alliance to escape the life of crime. Became an N7. Became a War Hero. Became an Spectre. Became the Commander of the revolutionary Normany. Broke Alliance norms by having a mixed crew. Defeated Sovereign and Saren.

Nothing was handed to Shepard. She was the real definition of perfect. Gaz always got what she wanted because she knew how to work hard. Hell – she even had Kaidan wrapped around her finger – or Miranda had thought on that shore-leave night. So she drank alone. None of the other crew had invited her out – not even Jacob. Growing up in a 'perfect' environment caused her people skills to be virtually non-existent. This made her come off as cold. Angry.

But when Shepard had been nearly killed and Kaidan had joined their ranks – it was a unique experience to actually work with the man. He was a damn good biotic and was like Shepard in a sense where he knew how to get where he wanted in order to get what he desired.

Mission by mission, she became attracted to the man. She knew he hated Cerberus and everything she represented – but yet with each mission, he treated her more and more like an equal.

And here they were.

She hadn't seen Kaidan since earlier that morning – when he disappeared out of her room as she slept. The motion had rocked her awake – just in time to see her door close. Had she gone too far? Was he still enamored with the Commander?

Miranda saved the document and quit – leaving her hands and mind idle.

The doors of her room opened, revealing her Commander upon crutches – swearing under her breath.

"Miranda," she smiled – yet something seemed cold behind her eyes, much like they were when Miranda had just seen Shepard's dead body.

"Commander," Miranda nodded her head in the woman's direction, "I'm glad to see you're up and moving."

"If I could, I'd jump and click my heels together," Shepard shrugged, "Alas I'm stuck on these things for a short-while, since the muscles and bones in my legs aren't quite up to par yet."

"I'm sorry to hear that, Commander."

"How are things with you?"

Miranda paused – a sudden fear of the Commander's wrath crawling through her own cybernetics, "I...Well, I'm doing well. Just finished a report on the last mission we had. I-"

"Why are you still writing reports? We're technically only with the Council now and they only want reports on things that alter populations of entire planets of multiple species."

"Habit," she admitted, suddenly unsure what to do with her hands. Did she normally put them on the desk? On her lap? Behind her head?

"We all have our weird little habits," Shepard was still standing – unusual for she normally took a seat across form Miranda, "I just stopped by to say I'm taking back Command. While I'd be worthless in a fire-fight, I can still lead."

"Of course, Commander."

"I'll let you get back to work."

As Shepard awkwardly turned to leave on her crutches, the door opened.

"Look, Miranda – I meant to come earlier and-"

Kaidan froze just inside the door – eyes locked on Shepard.

"Alenko," she nodded, "Can you move aside, so I may pass? Crutches don't allow me to slide around people as well as I'd like."

"I...of course Commander."

"Also, I need to speak with you. Briefing room in five."

As the door closed behind Shepard, Kaidan let out a breath which sounded like he had been holding since he first entered the room.

"That was unique," Miranda remarked, shaking her head.

"You could say that..."

"Are you alright? Where did you go this morning?"

"I shouldn't keep the Commander waiting."

"I...alright."

Kaidan turned to leave, but paused as he was about to reopen the door.

"It was a migraine. Happens since I'm an L2."

"Feeling any better?"

"No."

–

AN: I felt like doing something a little different for this chapter. My first playthrough of Mass Effect 2 left me hating Miranda. While I still don't love her, I have gained a strange respect and even pity for her. This chapter somewhat just explains Miranda's side of everything ever. I'm aware that Kaidan/Miranda is very unlikely in canon because she's Cerberus, but that was actually on purpose! GASP! That shall be revealed. I also like how Shepard isn't directly saying anything to Miranda, but you can just feel it. Gah. Also, I don't know why, but I want to hug Kaidan at the end of this chapter. He seems so pathetic. Kicked puppy, much? I know this wasn't a really funny, sexy, or even M-rated chapter – but I just wanted to toy with something new. I didn't want all the chapters to be exactly the same with Joker doing something adorkable, Shepard thinking deep, Kaidan hating everything, and Thane secretly letting everyone lick him. Yup. Also, I hope you are all enjoying the Mass Effect 3 demo as much as me. The single-player part had me a bit undecided – but I LOVE THE MULTIPLAYER. I want a Drell Vanguard so badly. I have a level 16 Vanguard human female at the moment...but I want a Drell! AND A HANAR! WHERE IS MY HANAR? I NEED BLASTO. Okay, I need to stop ranting and let you people get on with your lives. Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Love reading your reviews. Feel free to keep suggesting names for the cat. Yes.

Rated M for: Future language, future sexual situations, future violence, and so I can have freedom without fear of scarring a teen for life. Except this chapter is actually pretty tame. Scary.

Oh – and I don't own anything ever.