The woman behind the counter looked up at them. "And what are your names?"
"The Doctor."
"Rose Tyler."
"Eggplant Popolopolus III." The Doctor glared at the Vigilante. He smiled back. "I like it. Makes me sound like a pirate. A hippie pirate." The woman smiled. "Booth Three is not is use. Please Enjoy your stay in Rome." They slid open the curtain to the booth. Inside was a futuristic-looking computer. Rose snorted. "What?" said the Vigilante. "Ancient Rome, and they've got computers."
"I know. I wonder what the porn is like?" Rose looked at him. "Oh, that's really charming."
"Yep. The ladies love me." The Vigilante examined the terminal. "Right. We've got two options. Option A: we listen to what the guided tour says, and trust that it's the truth. Or Option Two – no, wait, Option B: we hack this sucker and go down the rabbit hole. Any objections to Option B/Two? No? Excellent." He turned to the Doctor. "You want this one?"
"Sure." The Doctor pulled out his sonic screwdriver, and pointed it at the console. Text and diagrams appeared on the screen. He looked closer. "Alright, so who are they?" said the Vigilante. "It says that the Descart were originally from the planet...Descart."
"They came from the planet Descart, so they call themselves the Descart? How very original."
"Yeah. Ah, here we go. They arrived – sorry, their ship crashed on Earth roughly a decade ago, For some reason, they couldn't build another ship themselves, so they technologically advanced the Romans to the point where they could build it for them."
"Any reason why they couldn't build it themselves?"
"Doesn't say. I'll see if I can pull up the blueprints for the ship." The Doctor held his sonic screwdriver to the screen again, then froze. "What? What is it?" the Vigilante asked him. When the Doctor spoke, his voice came out as a whisper. "It's a L.F.L.A. "