The Cuddly Kitten
"I know it's around here somewhere…" Flynn had been leading the group around to look for a place to eat. He had a certain place in mind, but he couldn't seem to find it anywhere. Of course, he forgot he wasn't in Corona territory anymore, so whatever he was looking for wasn't in this area.
Then he saw a sign. "Ah, there it is. The… Cuddly Kitten."
It looked similar to the Snuggly Duckling, only the sign had a kitten hanging under it instead. His uncle Hook Hand, Big Nose, Vladimir and the rest of them usually visited the castle because it wasn't safe for a little kid to go to a bar, but he would've recognized the bar by description from the stories his parents told him. And now that he was older, he could go into a bar and not even think twice about it.
Flynn didn't pay much mind to the name of this bar. How likely was it that there was another bar of thugs and ruffians with a similar irresolute name?
"Don't worry. This place is very quaint. Perfect for little ladies like yourself. Wouldn't want you scaring and giving up on this whole endeavor, would we?"
"Well… I do love kittens." Lupe snorted. "I don't like them more than puppies, Lupe. But they are just as adorable."
"Yay!" Flynn exclaimed with feign glee.
As soon as they were at the entrance of the Cuddly Kitten, Flynn slammed the door open and said, "Garçon, your finest table, please!"
Selena gasped when she saw a bunch of vicious looking ruffians in the bar. Flynn wasn't very surprised; he should've known there would be thugs in this bar, too. The sign was just too peculiar. However, Selena wasn't acting as calm as he was. She backed away and pointed her frying pan at them all as Flynn simply guided her further into the bar.
"You smell that? Take a deep breath through the nose." He inhaled to demonstrate. He almost gagged at the scent, but he kept a straight face. "Really let that seep in. What are you getting? Because to me, it's part man-smell, and the other part is really bad man-smell. I don't know why, but overall it smells like the color brown. Your thoughts?"
Selena screamed and ran when one of the hoodlums tugged at her long white hair. "Her hair's white," he said in awe.
"Is that blood on your mustache?" Flynn asked. "Snow White, look at this! Look at all the blood in his mustache!"
Selena ignored him as she backed away and pointed her frying pan at them again. She accidentally bumped into another hoodlum and pointed her pan at him. Lupe ran in front of Selena protectively and snarled at him.
"Jeez, you don't look so good, Snow White. Maybe we should get you home and call it a day. Probably better off. This is a five-star joint, after all, and if you can't handle it, then maybe you should go back to that little hovel of yours."
Their exit was suddenly blocked by an enormous thug. He held out an old bounty poster. "Are you this guy?" Flynn's eyes widened when he recognized the man in the picture. It was his father, the original Flynn Rider, except with a protruding nose that obviously didn't belong on his face. Pascal, who was on Selena's shoulder, snickered at the picture.
"Um…"
"Hey, guys! It's Flynn Rider! He's back!"
"Someone, find the guards!" a man commanded. He grabbed Flynn's shirt and pulled him up to his face. "That reward is going to get me a new leg."
"No," another crook pulled Flynn away, "that reward's mine!"
The first one pulled him back. "I saw him first!"
"We can work this out!" Flynn reasoned. Of course, these men weren't the type to listen to reason.
"Hey! Leave him alone!" Selena watched in fear as her guide was tossed back and forth. She tried pushing through the crowd to retrieve him, but there were too many of them. "Give me my guide back, hoodlums!" She even tried hitting them with her frying pan, but their armor was in the way. It was a futile effort.
"Gentlemen, please…!"
The men grabbed his arms and legs so he couldn't move. The man with the peg leg got ready to slug him. Flynn moved his head away from his fist, but then another man grabbed his head so it wouldn't move.
"Put him down!" Selena exclaimed, but it was mute compared to their shouting.
On instinct, Lupe bit one of the men in the buttocks. He howled in pain, and all of the men stopped pulling on Flynn, turning their attention to the girl and her wolf. She pointed the frying pan at them in defense. "I'd like my guide back now…" She grimaced at the fearsome looks on the their faces. "… please!"
The man holding Flynn's head hung him up like a coat and handed the crook who was bitten his mallet. It was the man with the peg leg. He stomped over to the young woman and held his mallet up high. Lupe stood in front of her defensively. Flynn looked away; he couldn't watch this slaughter.
"Hey, Peg Leg!" Another formidable group of ruffians entered the bar. In the front was a man with a thick mustache and a hooked hand. "You pickin' on poor little girls?"
"Hook Hand!" Flynn exclaimed. "You guys!"
Hook Hand looked at the young man in confusion. "Flynn?" He almost didn't recognize the him with his hat on.
"Hook Hand?" Selena echoed. Flynn was friends with these ruffians?
"Well, well," Peg Leg jeered. "If it isn't my twin brother and his friends from the Snuggly Duckling. Don't you have a piano concert to attend?"
"Twin brother?" Flynn and Selena exchanged puzzled glances. Then Flynn saw the resemblance; Peg Leg looked exactly like Hook Hand, except he had a mission leg instead of a missing hand, and he had a goatee.
"What are you doing with these two?" Hook Hand questioned.
"Back off!" A man from the Cuddly Kitten stood in front of him. "These two wandered into our bar! They're ours!"
"Yeah, you aren't getting the reward for Flynn Rider!"
"Flynn Rider?" The men from the Snuggly Duckling began to murmur amongst themselves. Hook Hand looked back at Flynn, and the prince gave him a look that begged them to save him. The ruffian decided to ask him how he got into this predicament later.
"That hurt, Peg Leg," Hook Hand said, faking how hurt he was. "After all, we all have dreams, am I right, boys?" His group nodded affirmatively. "In fact, wasn't it your dream to become a flutist, Peg Leg?"
All the men gasped, waiting to see Peg Leg's reaction. He slowly walked away from the cowering young woman and confronted his brother. Flynn thought this would turn into a bar fight (God forbid it would) so he was prepared to run, but then Peg Leg began to tear up.
"It's true! I've always wanted to play the flute! I practice everyday!" He pulled out a white flute to prove his point.
The giant man standing next to Flynn suddenly stepped out and confessed, "I collect ceramic pegasi!"
"I sew dolls for orphans!" one said.
"I make candles!" another one cried.
One by one, each hoodlum began to make teary, heartfelt confessions of their dreams, and it slowly turned into a show tune medley. It all came down to Selena and Flynn, who were watching silently as each ruffian confessed their dreams. Of course, Flynn wasn't very surprised when Selena happily sang to everyone about how she wanted to see the lanterns and the lupines on her birthday; this girl was very naïve. At least it distracted the rest of the hoodlums so Big Nose could unhook him.
"Thanks you guys," he said.
"No problem, Flynn," Hook Hand replied. "Anything for our favorite little nephew." He put the prince into a hammerlock, but Flynn was able to stop him before he could put a hole in his head.
"How'd you find me?"
"We didn't know you'd be here," Gunter answered. "We were on our way here to claim what was rightfully ours."
"'What's rightfully yours'?" Flynn repeated.
"The Cuddly Kitten always steals our mascot from us every year," Attila explained. "And every year, we always have to come here and steal it back, but it usually ends up… bloody."
"'Bloody'?" He wondered when they got a mascot in the first place.
"Don't worry." Attila hold up a spotted, gray boar. "We got him."
Flynn looked at the pig in perplexity. "Shouldn't you guys have a duck as your mascot instead of a boar?"
The ruffians laughed. "The boar's family. We can't just get a duck!"
"So…" Hook Hand put his arm around his shoulder. "What are you doing outside of Corona?"
"—as Flynn Rider?" Gunter queried.
"—in the Cuddly Kitten?" Vladimir asked.
"—with that girl?" Attila finished.
"Is she a part of your dream?" Big Nose inquired.
Flynn shrugged Hook Hand's arm away. "I-I don't know what you're talking about! It was… I was just…!" He cleared his throat and decided to change the subject. "We need to leave before more trouble comes."
Suddenly, the hoodlum who ran out to get some guards came back. "I found the guards!" he announced. Three soldiers from Luna entered the bar, who Flynn sadly recognized. Between them, Flynn also recognized the two men he ran into in the forest. They apparently weren't happy to be arrested.
The man in front, the captain Flynn recognized, came out and said, "We're looking for Flynn Rider. He's assisted in the larceny of the lost princess's crown, and apparently he's in this bar. He looks like this." The guard held up another old copy of Flynn Rider's bounty. Flynn frowned; this Flynn's nose was more plump than the other one. Now they were just being mean. "Where is he?"
Flynn grabbed Selena and they hid behind the counter. "What do we do now?" she asked.
He looked around. "There has to be some kind of secret exit." Since the Cuddly Kitten was so similar to the Snuggly Duckling, he figured there would be some kind of hidden passage behind the counter.
"Hey!" The two glanced over the counter and saw Peg Leg pointing an accusing finger at Attila. "They stole our boar!" The men of the Cuddly Kitten suddenly turned their attention to the group from the Snuggly Duckling. "Were not going to let them get away with that, are we, boys?"
"No way!"
"Let's get 'em!"
The whole bar suddenly broke out into a brawl. The soldiers and the crooks were suddenly wrapped up in the brouhaha, giving the Selena and Flynn the chance to escape. Unfortunately, they still didn't have any place to go.
"Psst!" Flynn and Selena turned and saw Peg Leg gesturing them. He suddenly pulled a familiar lever, revealing a secret tunnel leading outside the bar. Hook Hand led them over to it alongside his brother.
"Go," Peg Leg said to the young woman. "Live your dream."
"I will. Thank you." Selena kissed him on the check before going down the path.
"And Flynn," Hook Hand caught the prince before he could leave, "don't forget your dream."
Flynn cleared his throat uncomfortably before shaking his uncle's hand. He didn't know how else to respond to that. "Okay. Thanks, Uncle Hook Hand." He pulled his hand down a bit before following Selena.
Maximus shouldn't have been surprised when the trail led him to a bar—the Cuddly Kitten, no less. The palace horse couldn't help rolling his eyes. These thugs were getting softer everyday. From where he was standing, it was total chaos in there.
"I don't think Flynn would be in there, Max," Jerrod said. "It's too dangerous; I doubt he'd take the risk."
Maximus ignored him and continued towards the bar.
Jerrod got off the saddle and followed the stallion slowly. From the sight of the bar, it looked perilous. He could see there was already a fight going on by the sounds of painful grunts and vulgar profanity. He was glad to have the sturdy, valiant horse with him—even though he was forced to go on this journey with him in the first place.
Jerrod stared at the stallion as he slammed the bar door open with one of his hooves. Maximus was acting like such a man, it didn't scare him as much as it freaked him out. Everyone else in the bar also froze when they saw the broad white stallion, which didn't seem to faze the horse at all.
"What's that horse doing here?" he heard someone say. He saw that it was a guard, but not just any guard. This soldier was from Luna, he could tell. His armor had moon emblem indented on it instead of the sun that Corona's men had.
Flynn made it all the way into Luna territory? Jerrod mused. You're so dead, buddy.
"Quiet!" another guard said. He looked like the captain. "Don't you know who that horse is? That's Maximus from Corona."
Jerrod was starting to get tired of these surprises. Apparently, Maximus's intimidating nature was renowned beyond the kingdom.
The young man rolled his eyes. What's next? Are the ruffians going to break into song?
Maximus didn't twitch as he made his way through the bar. He didn't want to waste his time investigating all the hubbub. He sniffed around, astoundingly able to find Flynn's scent among the musty, sweaty, really bad man-stench. He stopped in front of the counter.
"What's he doing?"
The leader covered the guard's mouth. They continued to observe Maximus as he climbed over the counter. He pointed to a lever with a kitten on it. Jerrod went to see what he was on about.
"What is it?" he asked. "You want me to pull it?" Maximus shook his head. "Push it?" He neighed, indicating that his answer was correct. Jerrod gave the horse a perplexed look before pushing the lever. The secret passage the stallion sniffed out suddenly appeared. The young man gaped at it in awe. "Amazing…"
Maximus gave him a smug look. No other horse would've been able to sniff that secret passage out. Maximus was truly an incredible palace horse.
Maximus whinnied again, telling Jerrod to get back on his saddle. The young man did so as the white stallion sped off, following his best friend's trail.
"Let's follow them!" the commander in charge said. "Lenard, keep an eye on those two. Make sure they don't escape."
The soldier saluted his commanding officer and watched as he and his other associate followed the white stallion. Lenard pointed his sword at Marty and Robby, watching them alertly. However, he was soon put into submission when Robby head-butted him into a coma.
"Let's go get our crown back," Marty said as Robby broke his shackles with the sword. The brothers quickly ran after the soldiers before anything else could get in their way.
Meanwhile, outside the Cuddly Kitten, a drunk ruffian stumbled out of the bar, singing in a slur. It wasn't until he saw a young woman in front of him when he stopped his terrible singing. At first, he thought the woman was a part of his inebriated hallucination, but when a bit of his vertigo disappeared, he saw that the woman was palpable.
"Whoa… Someone better call Heaven, because I think it's missing an angel."
"Oh, stop it, ya big lug," she laughed. He began laughing with her until a knife was pointed at his nose. "Where does that little tunnel lead to?"
The drunkard gulped. "Knife…!"
This was a really fun chapter to write. I thought about having Flynn take Selena to the Snuggly Duckling, but that was all the way in Corona. So instead, writing a Snuggly Duckling counterpart seemed a lot funnier, but I couldn't write it without adding Hook Hand and his gang into the mix!
R&R!