Fast update, I know. I had this bouncing around in my head and I had to get it down before I lost it. Also, I would like to thank alley529 for reviewing. Just a weird note, I was watching the Kill Bill movies while writing this.

I do not own The Outsiders.

Three weeks passed and Alex still hung out with us. I would meet up with her in front of her house in the morning, and we would hang out with the gang for an hour or two after school. Much to Steve's surprise, she never once complained about her dad. He asked her why one day, and her reply had been simple.

"Why should I waste my time talking about someone I hate?"

After that, Steve only showed that she annoyed him because she was my age, so therefore she was a kid who would want to tag along somewhere he didn't want her. But other than him, Alex got along with everyone else in the gang and we were all having a pretty good time.

And then Johnny got jumped.

She'd been walking by the lot at the same time I had with Soda and Steve, and she ran over with us. When she saw him, I saw something in her eyes that I had never seen from her before.

She looked guilty and ashamed. But before I could ask her why, she turned and ran off. I watched her run down the street, her footsteps echoing back to me, until she disappeared

The others saw her run too, and none of them looked happy. But I was mad too. I thought she was our friend, and friends stuck by each other through everything. How could she just run off when Johnny needed her, needed us? How could she turn her back to us like that?

Pushing my anger aside, I turned back to Johnny. Soda had picked him up and leaned him against his shoulder, gently trying to wake him up. Then Johnny stirred a little. "Soda?"

"Yeah, it's me. Don't talk, you're gonna be okay," Soda said.

"Is Alex here?" Johnny asked softly.

Soda looked about as confused as I felt. "Sorry Johnny, she ran off when she saw you."

Johnny's reply only confused me more. "Good."

That really threw me, but it also made me even angrier. Johnny didn't want Alex there for some reason. I really wanted to know that reason, but I also knew that Johnny was in no shape to answer a ton of questions. Still, no matter how hard I tried to focus on Johnny, it kept coming back to the front of my mind. Why didn't he want Alex there? Did she do something? Why did she run? Did she have something to do with him getting jumped?

That last one almost made me sick. Did Alex have something to do with what happened to Johnny? I wanted to completely forget that thought, there was no way she would do something like that. I had never seen her have any kind of problem with Johnny; she loved him just like everyone else did. Unfortunately, one part of my mind kept telling me that it was a possibility.

And that part was talking pretty loud.

A few days later I walked down the sidewalk towards the school. I wanted to stay home again, but Darry said I missed enough school and he made me go. I did, but not only because he told me to. I really wanted to talk to Alex and figure out what the hell had happened with her.

I stopped in front of her house, like I usually did. As usual, I heard yelling behind the door. Only this time, it didn't sound like her dad yelling back at her. The voices sounded younger, and I realized she was yelling at her brothers. I couldn't make out what they were saying because the volume was so high, but she sounded even madder than she usually did. I thought I heard her voice break a few times, like she was close to tears.

"If you guys weren't so freaking stupid, I wouldn't have to walk around with this guilt hanging over me! Next time find somebody else!" she screamed loudly, but clear enough for me to make out. The front door flew open and she stomped out. Even from my distance, I could see her shaking. She looked up at me, but then looked down and walked right past me.

I couldn't believe it. She ran away from Johnny, and now she was trying to ignore me like nothing had happened? I ran after her and caught up easily. "Alex, I gotta talk to you."

"What could there possibly be for us to talk about?" she asked bitterly. Her voice sounded thick, like she was trying to keep herself from crying.

"How about you running off when Johnny got jumped? How could you do that? He needed us." She turned her face further away from me and didn't say anything. She picked up her pace slightly and walked ahead of me. Now I was pissed. She wasn't gonna walk away and pretend that nothing happened.

I grabbed Alex's arm and pulled her back. She tried to pull her arm out of my grasp. "Ponyboy let go of me," she said softly. She still wasn't looking at me. "Let go."

"You're not walking away from this. Why did you say that to your brothers before you left? What the hell is going on?" My voice rose, and soon I was almost yelling at her. Then she faced me, and my anger cooled a little.

She looked so worn out, like she was carrying a huge weight and couldn't take it. Her skin was paler than normal and there were dark bags under her bloodshot eyes. Her braid was messy, like she'd slept in it and hadn't bothered to fix it. It looked like every breath took all the energy she had and her body barely had time to make more for the next breath.

She sighed. "Pony, I know I don't have the right to ask you any favors, but I'm gonna anyway. Please, don't ask me why I ran. Don't ask me why I said that to Brian and Tyler. Don't ask me why I look like shit right now. Don't ask me if I'm alright. Don't ask me what the hell is going on." She closed her eyes and took a shuddering breath before continuing. "Because if you do, I'll break down and tell you the answers. And then you'll hate me. I'd rather you hate me because I didn't tell you than have you hate me for what really happened. Now please let go of my arm."

My grip relaxed and she pulled her arm away. She gave me one more look before turning and walking off. I waited a little while before I started walking too. I didn't want to walk in the same time as her. I was still mad because she didn't tell me, but I was also mad because she thought she knew how I would react.

Alex had only known me for a few weeks, how could she know how I would take whatever she would tell me? The way that I saw it, unless she did have something to do with Johnny, I wouldn't hate her. I just wanted to know what happened.

After school I walked out the door without waiting for her. Trying to push through the crowd, I saw her out of the corner of my eye. She was standing off to the side, obviously waiting for the crowd to thin, with a cigarette hanging from her lips. She didn't see me as I watched her take the cigarette out of her mouth. I saw her fingers shaking as she did and she glanced around nervously. I walked away before she saw me.

I met up with Two-Bit, Dally, and Steve just before Alex's house. All three had a dangerous look in their eyes and I had an idea of what they wanted to do.

Two-Bit turned to me as I walked up. "Did you see Alex today?" I nodded and looked at the ground. "You ask her why she ran?" I nodded again. "And?"

I looked back up at them, feeling a grimace form on my face. "She won't tell me why she ran, but she did tell me not to ask her again. She'd rather us hate her for not telling than hate her for the truth." They were fuming now and I honestly thought they were gonna explode like you see in cartoons.

Dally looked off at the street and somehow managed to look even madder. I followed his gaze and saw Alex walking down the middle of the street, making a wide arc around us. She was clearly trying to get to her house without having to go through us.

Apparently Dally wasn't gonna let that happen. Without warning, he marched over to her and grabbed her arm. "What the hell Dally?" I heard her yell. He dragged her back over to the sidewalk and threw her towards us. He stepped up and Steve stepped to the side so we made a circle, trapping her in the middle.

Alex got her balance back and looked around at us. Suddenly the sad, guilty look that she had been wearing all day was replaced with rage. I almost took a step back when she looked at me.

Turning back to Dally and Steve, she growled, "Get the hell out of my way."

"Not a chance," Steve shot back.

"Why'd you run?" Two-Bit asked.

Alex whirled around to face him. The composure her rage gave her was already starting to crack. "Don't ask me that."

"Why did Johnny say it was good that you weren't there when we found him?" Dally spat at her.

"How could you just take off like that?"

"Why do you look so guilty right now?"

The three of them hurled questions at her, but I stayed quiet. I almost told them it wouldn't do any good, but I knew they wouldn't listen to me. Alex kept turning in a circle, looking at all of us. Her face kept crumbling with every turn and I saw tears welling up in her eyes. I couldn't help but feel bad for her then. I didn't think her to be the crying type, so seeing her break was shocking.

Her hands flew to her head and she gripped her hair, eyes squeezing shut. She started shaking real bad and I heard her breathing pick up to a rate that I was sure wasn't healthy. I saw her muscles tense up so much her tendons could've been seen a mile away.

Then, Alex threw her head back and screamed at the sky. A long, shrill sound and made my blood feel icy. She brought her head back down and looked completely defeated, and that scared me. I knew how strong she was, so I never thought that I would see her look like this.

"It was my brothers, okay?" she screamed at us.

Okay, this was a real intense chapter for me to write. It may not seem like it, but it was. I was shaking when I finished. I didn't write out Johnny getting beaten up because S.E. Hinton already did that and I didn't think it would be right. Sorry if this seems a little rushed, but it seemed too short to stop it after she told Ponyboy not to ask her that.

I won't be surprised if you know what her brothers did. I'm not good at being subtle.

Ciao,

Kris