Looks Bad Doesn't It?

As soon as they got back from the wedding Kelly and Ethan went back to Chicago. Antonio's parents had been up all the night before anticipating the wedding of their son, so they went up to the guest room to take a nap before dinner.

Antonio came into the kitchen where Nicole was cooking.

"Is Elias still out?" she asked.

"Like a light. There is no way he is going to be up for supper. I'll just tell my parents he's sick."

"Cheer up. This is a special night."

"Speaking of that, why are you slaving over the stove on our wedding night?"

"I don't mind."

"This isn't what I hear people do on their wedding night."

"We have two weeks to do that. I like that we our going to spend our first night as a family together. I wish Kelly could have stayed. But I'm really happy that she is so excited to get her new life started. I think she's really going to make it this time."

xxxxx

It had been two hours that Nathan and Jess waited for the prognosis of their son. Both of them were all out of tears and had been sitting in silence for the better part of an hour.

"I'm sorry," Nathan said.

"It wasn't your fault."

"I was watching T.V. while our baby was suffocating."

"I was the one who told you to turn off the monitor."

"I should have known he quieted down too fast."

"Blaming yourself won't help anyone."

"I need some air. I'll be back in five minutes. Let me know if they tell you anything."

xxxxx

"Dana Brooks, Child Welfare."

"It's about time," the pediatrician said.

"You said you suspected a seven-month-old was suffocated by his father?"

"I am just required by law to call you into anything even remotely suspicious. I don't know if the parents did anything. The father claims he left the baby on his back in the crib. When the mother checked him he was face down and not breathing."

"Are there any other signs of abuse?"

"He did have a bruise on his arm. His father said it happened when the baby accidentally hit his arm on the side of the changing table."

"Seven-month-old infants don't usually suffocate themselves, do they?"

"It usually happens with babies under six months old, but here's the kicker, this child was premature. He's developing slower. Right now he is the weight—and has about the strength—of a five-month-old. It is not at all outside of the realm of possibility that this was an accident. If it weren't for the bruise I never would have called it in."

"You did the right thing. Where are the parents?"

"Down the hall, to the left."

"And how is the child?"

"I'm keeping him over night for observation, but he'll be fine. He was revived before any damage could be done."

xxxxx

"Mrs. Massey?" Dana said.

"Yes. How is my son?" Jess asked the woman she thought was a doctor.

"He will be fine." She flashed her I.D. at Jess. "I am Dana Brooks from Child Welfare."

Jess let out a breath she wasn't aware she was holding when she heard Joe was okay. She wasn't at all shocked to see a social worker. She knew the laws. "I figured they'd call you. Look, it was an accident. Joseph has been unusually fussy for a while now and he was overtired. I'm sure he rolled over on his stomach and was too exhausted to wake up to roll on his back."

"The doctor said your husband was alone with the child all day."

"He was."

"Where were you?"

"At a wedding."

"How long was your son alone with your husband?"

"About seven hours."

"Has he cared for the child before?"

"All the time. I want to see my son."

"I need to speak to your husband."

"He's outside. Can I see my son now?"

"Yes."

xxxxx

The police that were first on the scene to Nathan's 911 call stayed behind after the ambulance left to speak to one of the next-door neighbors Mrs. Abernathy. She was the busy body of the neighborhood and was happy to tell the cops that she heard Joe cry all the time. Her words prompted the police to tell Child Welfare to investigate.

xxxxx

Nathan and Jess were in Joe's I.C.U. room watching their son sleep. And watching them with very hostile and suspicious eyes were nurses in the nursing station. They were alone in the room, so they could talk without being heard.

"Are they ever going to stop watching us?" Nathan asked.

Jess didn't say anything.

"What's the matter? The pediatrician said he'll be okay."

"This looks really bad, Nathan. At first I wasn't thinking straight, so I didn't see it. But now…I see how bad this looks."

"You know I have really good lawyers. Nothing bad will happen. I'll take care of it."

"No, Nathan. Don't even think about it. We will handle this together and legally. No bribes, no threats. Okay?"

"Okay, but it will take longer."

"It's worth it. Listen, I think we should call the family."

"Why? I don't want people knowing about this."

"Neither do I, but if worse comes to worse and they take him from us they won't put him in a foster home if he has a relative in the state. I don't like it any more than you, but I like our baby being cared for by strangers less."

"Okay. Call someone."

xxxxx

"Elian, sit properly and use your fork," Mariela scolded her youngest child.

"He's fine, dear," Dave said.

"Easy for you to say. You're not going to have to get that stain out of his shirt."

"That's enough, both of you," Carlos said.

"Do you two do that yet?" Armena asked.

"Not yet," Antonio and Nicole said.

"Just wait," Carla laughed.

Antonio asked his wife if they should tell their family what they'd been talking about.

"Go ahead," Nicole said.

"We've decided to look into adoption when we get back from Hawaii."

"That's great," Carla said. "I was starting to wonder if I would ever be a grandmother. But why adoption, is something wrong?"

"No. Not that we know. But I am thirty-two. The reason we want to adopt is because Antonio and I thought it better to make a home for a child who is already here rather than bring another one into the world."

"I think it's wonderful," Armena said. "Congratulations."

"What is adoption?" Elian asked.

"That means that you are going to have a new cousin soon," Mariela gave the simplest answer she could come up with.

xxxxx

Nicole looked out the window as their plane left the ground. In twelve hours they would be in sunny Hawaii. Antonio was sitting next to her with a goofy smile on his face.

"I know what you're thinking of," she said. "You're just thrilled about this adoption thing aren't you?"

"Let's also try to have a child of our own."

"Oh no, not you too."

"Not me too what?"

"Did you hear what your sister said to Elian last night, when he asked what adoption is?"

"She said he would have a cousin soon."

"That wasn't much of an answer. Why didn't she tell him exactly what it means?"

"Maybe she thought he was too young."

"Or maybe she didn't want him feeling like this kid isn't really his family."

"Is this about Elian and Mariela or you?"

"When I was in the foster homes I had a lot of bad experiences and a lot of bad feelings, but I think the worst feeling I ever had was that I didn't belong there. I don't want our family to make our daughter feel that way. And she will be our daughter."

"Mariela isn't like that. She will love this girl like she would if you gave birth to her. And Yarisbet, Alex, and Elian will follow by example. I promise."

"What about you? Why did you want a biological child?"

"…Okay, I'll tell you. Last year-"

"Oh boy. Here is comes. Anytime you start a sentence with last year I know what's coming. Let me guess, your brush with death made you want to leave a part of you on this earth."

He laughed. "You got me. But also I just think it would be nice to have something that is a part of us."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay. We'll throw away the birth control and whatever happens happens. And we will still talk to an agency when we get back."

"Deal."

xxxxx

Jess met her mother outside of the hospital when her cab pulled up. "What kept you so long?"

"The only flight I could get wasn't until four this morning."

"Nathan and I have to meet that social worker at noon and I didn't want Joe to be alone."

"Are they arresting you?"

"My lawyer says they're just going to talk to us at Child Welfare. I don't know what's going to happen after that."

"You didn't sound like you were telling me the whole story over the phone last night. It sounds like they are making a lot out of this. Babies smother themselves all the time."

"I think it was that b..witch Gloria Abernathy. Joe's been crying a lot and I know she told the police that. I'm sure she also said we fought a lot in the beginning of our marriage."

xxxxx

"Does your son cry a lot?" a social worker asked Nathan.

"Lately yes. He might be teething."

"I didn't see any teeth."

"I said might."

"I have a daughter. When she was Joseph's age she was colicky. She would scream for hours on end. It drove me out of my mind. I know how aggravating a fussy baby can be. Sometimes you just want to do something..anything to quiet them."

"I didn't smother my son."

xxxxx

In another room Dana was speaking to Jess.

"Is Nathan patient with Joseph when he's crying?"

"Sometimes he's more patient than I am. Nathan loves Joe more than I ever thought a man could love a child he didn't make. You would never know Joe isn't his biological son."

"Sometimes people are sick. That sickness can make it very easy for them to hurt or accidentally kill someone they really do love."

"I know about that. I'm no idiot, Ms. Brooks. I know about child abusers. And I know my husband isn't one of them."

"From what we here you're not home with him very often when he's with the baby. How do you really know what goes on when you're gone?"

"I know Nathan."

xxxxx

"So let's go over this again."

"Joe was crying. He had been crying for hours. I decided to leave him in his crib. I thought he might cry himself to sleep. Jess came home, went to check on him, saw he wasn't breathing."

"That's a tad bit different then the last story you told."

"Yes I called my wife. Yes she suggested I leave him alone. But I was responsible for him. I don't even know why Jess is here. She didn't do anything wrong. All this stress is not good for her. She's pregnant."

xxxxx

"Why did you decide to check on your son?"

"Nathan said he fell asleep abruptly. He usually doesn't do that. Joe usually cries himself to sleep slowly."

"The doctors said Joseph was revived just before any damage could be done…Your husband is in medical school isn't he?"

"If you're going where I think you are with this. You need to get the story straight. I revived Joe while Nathan called 911."

"But he made sure you went in there."

"I went in there as soon as I got home. I suppose you're going to tell me he had control over when I walked through the front door too. I know it sounds like a big coincidence. God was watching out for him."

xxxxx

"I laid him on the changing table and he was flailing and kicking. He hit his arm on the rail."

Nathan was angry at the allegations against him, but he was still respectful of the social worker. She was wrong about him, but he had deep respect for people who helped children in need. His son just was not one them.

xxxxx

"I am going to a funeral today," Dana said. "For a boy whose father killed him. He threw him against the wall. He had been beating that child for months and the boy's mother never knew about it…until Jay was dead."

"That's sad..tragic really, but that's not what's happening to my son. I think we're done here."

xxxxx

On the plane they were flipping through pamphlets of the resort they would be staying at.

"I want to try this, parasailing," Nicole said.

"You're not getting me up there."

"What do you want to do?"

"I'd like to try this golf course."

"Golfing? You can do that at home. We're going to Hawaii. This is probably our last vacation for a long time if we are going to have kids. We could be home bound for years."

"You're not chickening out on me are you?"

"Not yet. Are we ready for this?"

"I've been ready for a long time. And I think you have too."

"Okay," she closed the pamphlet. "That is the last thing we are going to say about our impending family until we get back to Maryland. This is our honeymoon." She kissed him.

xxxxx

"What do we think?" the Child Welfare supervisor asked the social workers.

"I think he did it," the one who talked to Nathan said.

"So do I," Dana said. "But I don't think the mother knows it."

"My question is…or it should have been do we have proof? Any real proof that can stand in a family court?"

"A seven-month-old almost died."

"But he didn't," Dana said. "He was revived just before it was too late, his mother sent by his father, a medical professional. Nathan knew he could shut that baby up without killing him."

"That won't stand up with a judge. All you have is a corrected-aged five-month-old baby who can't even sit up. He very easily could have smothered himself."

"What about the bruise?"

"One bruise means nothing."

"It means a lot when it was obtained the very day he almost died. Sir,-"

"Sir nothing. Close it."

xxxxx

When her cell went off Jess left Joe's I.C.U. room to answer the call.

"Massey."

"Good news," her lawyer said, "Child Welfare is closing the case as inconclusive. It's over."

"Inconclusive. That means they can reopen it at any time."

"Let's worry about that when and if it happens. Usually when these things get closed they stay closed. Take your son home. Get on with your lives."

"I guess it's better than the alternative. Thanks." Jess put away her cell and as she looked down the hall to her dismay she saw the last person in the world she wished to see—Nicole's mother.

"Hi, Jess. What are you doing here, working?"

"No. I'm not in the field."

"So then what brings you here?"

She thought about lying, but she figured Carla would learn the truth sooner or later and she wanted her to hear her side of it before the other nurses told her what they thought. "…My son. He's in the I.C.U. He's all right though. He's being released in a few minutes."

"Thank God. What happened?"

"He smothered himself in his crib…Listen, Carla, I know about doctor/patient confidentiality. Is there a such thing as nurse/patient's mother confidentiality?"

"Don't worry. I won't tell Nicole."

"Thank you."

That afternoon Joe was released into his parents' custody.

xxxxx

At seven that evening Jess did what she always did when she was home to rock Joe to sleep. She rocked him to sleep singing Joe Knows How To Live By Eddy Raven.

"He's asleep," Jess came out to the family room to her mom and Nathan.

"Mom was just telling me that Doug and Sylvia have been seeing each other," Nathan said.

"Are you kidding?"

"Ever since the wedding."

"I was surprised too," Nathan said. "Sylvia's never seen the same guy for more than one night."

"I hope they work out," Jess said. "They both need a stable relationship. And we have something to tell you too, mom. You are going to have another grandson in September."

They had a quiet celebration that evening. Celebrating Joe's survival and the impending arrival of the newest member of their family.

"I have to get to bed. My flight is early." Toni kissed Jess and Nathan. "Goodnight and if I don't see you before I leave good morning and goodbye."

"Bye," Jess said.

"Goodnight," Nathan said.

Nathan reclined in his chair. "Tough two days, huh?"

"I want you to know that I never thought for a second that you hurt him."

"I know."

"Joe is lucky to have you and so am I."

"I'm lucky too."

xxxxx

The following Sunday Jess and Nathan went somewhere they hadn't been in a long time—church. They sung the songs and prayed to their Lord, all the while thanking him that they could do it with their son in their arms.

In Hawaii Nicole and Antonio had their last big hurrah before they tied themselves down with kids.