Thank you to everyone who reviewed yesterday. I had a really bad day so they cheered me up immensely. Love, IJKS xxx
Chapter Five
Inspector Joyce doesn't plan on pressing charges against me. He can't make the final decision but he told me that he'd fight for me to keep my job if I want it back – which I do.
He visited me here in hospital and listened patiently as I confessed to everything. I told him that I'd figured out that Brax had been set up for that robbery and I went against the law to try and save him. I explained that although I still believed in his innocence, I know I did the wrong thing. It was when I realised that I couldn't rescue him legally, I broke the rules and cut corners.
When Joyce gave me the job of transferring evidence with Watson, I came up with a plan. I texted Brax to let him know where the car would be when I 'spontaneously' suggested that Watson and got a cup of coffee to break up the day. When we returned, the car's back window had been broken into and the evidence, including an unrelated bag of cocaine, had been stolen.
I felt sick about dropping him in it but I also had to reveal that Brax had stashed the cocaine on the property of the drug dealer they arrested, the guy who originally owned the cocaine. Joyce has told me that there will ramifications for Brax and he could certainly be facing jail for theft. I feel terrible but none of these things should have happened. We both broke the law and we both have to face the consequences.
I also told Joyce that Heath and Bianca were not the ones that Liam crashed into that day on his motorbike. I explained that I felt so awful about the evidence that I resigned and then tried to take off for a few days with my best friend. The boys came to find us and I got back together with Brax.
We were the ones in the car when Liam ran into us. I was injured and Brax panicked so Heath took the blame and stayed at the scene with Bianca while Brax drove me to a motel room he rents long term to recuperate.
I expressed how terrible I felt about everything and I might have exaggerated how bad Brax felt about it. I mean, I know he had some guilt but his approach was fairly cavalier. He comes from the perspective of, 'we do what needs to be done' and it doesn't really matter if it's legal or moral or honest. I've tried to stand up for him as best I can but I don't know what will happen to either of us now.
Joyce said that he would be in touch about my fate. He was hopeful that my full co-operation would mean that no charges would be brought against me. And while I am likely to be demoted, he said that he thought so highly of me as an officer and, prior to Brax, my record has been so exemplary that he can't see me being removed from the force completely.
I feel strangely peaceful about it all. You'd think I'd be terrified but after everything that's happened, losing my job or being demoted or something, really feels like the least of my worries. I have to accept whatever comes at me. And I have to deal with everything, step by step in order to become the person I'm meant to be, hopefully a person that I like.
I'm sure I'll have made even more of an enemy of the River Boys, especially the Braxtons, than I already was and of course, this time I won't have Brax on my side. But I will have to deal with the fallout of everything as it happens. Quite frankly, so long as I have my daughter, my best friends, the truth and a beating heart, I'm happy. And from there, I am determined to make everything right again.
Ruby came by tonight, armed with all the things I asked her for.
"What on earth is all this for?" she asked when she dumped them all (carefully) on my bed.
I'd written out a list of DVDs and books that I wanted.
"I'm bored," I replied easily.
"And training to be a lesbian?" she asked, nodding towards my display.
I snorted with laughter.
The books I'd requested were by all of Joey's favourite 'gay' authors – specifically, Jeanette Winterson and Sarah Waters. I also knew she was a bit fan of Virginia Woolf so I'd asked Ruby to get me some of those too.
The DVDs followed the same theme. I'd ordered Better Than Chocolate, If These Walls Could Talk 2, There's Something About Jane and But I'm a Cheerleader. They were all names of films that Joey, when fantasising about our future, planned to share with me.
Part of my big plan is to turn myself into the kind of woman that Joey would want to be with. I want to show her that I can be the person she believed in. I want to have the time and the opportunity to prove my love for her and give her a reason to take me back. Let's just hope I can find her now…
Next time… Brax confronts Charlie…