I had already posted this chapter months ago, but now I re-written it, trying to make it sound a little less mellow and boring.

Truthfulpen: Thank you for your review. I'm so happy that you're enjoying the fic. As for the spelling problems... well, yeah, it's not my forte. I review the chapters before posting them, but English is not my first language and quite often these sort of things happen. I'm trying to improve, though. If you catch any more mistakes, please let me know.

Reviews and comments are all welcomed (whatever helps me improve).

Thanks!

dai86

Chapter 8

… and truths

Five years ago...

As Sakura grasped the edges of consciousness, she became aware of an unpleasant sense of pain. Her limbs felt heavy and her body stiff. Everything seemed blurry and confused. Yet, among the cloud of haziness she could feel a comforting presence hovering over her. There was a cooling touch on her forehead as she heard a soft whisper. "Shhh, you're fine. Forget the pain."

And in the same moment the pain ebbed away, leaving a pleasant feeling of numbness.

She tried to reach for that voice, that comforting whisper echoing in her mind. It made her feel safe, the way she felt when she was with him…

"Itachi-kun…"

She curled her fingers and winced at how swollen they felt. It dissipated a little of her haziness and she tried to open her eyes. She saw a shadow above her, and after her vision adjusted to the dim light, Sakura recognized the person.

"Jin?..." she mumbled with a confused frown, for an instant remembering the civilian boy who used to bring her flowers.

But the spell was broken abruptly when it all came back to her – the ambush, the fight, the mind probing... the torture. Her pained fingers brought back the memory of Kouga breaking them one by one…

Focusing her vision at the figure next to her, she withdrew her hand, wincing. Jin was kneeling next to her, watching her expectantly. She tried to recoil but her body was mostly unresponsive. All she got was the pain back as her limbs moved awkwardly, drawing a groan out of her.

"You'd better not move before you heal yourself," he advised, not unkindly. "I reset your fingers, and dressed the wounds, but I couldn't do much more."

She eyed him suspiciously for a minute, trying to determine his intentions. But Jin kept his neutral demeanor, even though he felt nowhere near neutral right now. He had just killed his captain when he entered the cave to find a disturbing scene.

His stomach clenched at the sight of the pink haired kunoichi shackled to the cave wall, hanging by her writs, fresh and crusted blood visible throughout her tattered clothes. Jin rushed to her side, moving to lay her down, but as he reached for the shackles he noticed the broken fingers.

He ignored the rage rising in his chest – the culprit was dead already – and focused on treating all the wounds he could notice – broken ribs, dislocated arm, senbon punctures. He did the best he could with her medical supplies and waited for her to regains consciousness… what led to the current situation.

Sakura managed a half sitting position, just know realizing she had been lying on a bedroll, and Jin backed away a little, granting her some space.

He easily saw through her body signs that she was wary of him. The fact didn't sit well with Jin, but he couldn't really blame her. She was gravely injured and at the mercy of one of the shinobi who had attacked her.

Strangely, his voice and eyes managed to soothe her somehow. "Don't worry. You won't be harmed further," he continued, and despite it all, Sakura found herself believing him.

"I'll remove the chakra binds so you can heal yourself properly. Do not try anything stupid."

She nodded.

Performing a short set of seals he touched the tattoo-like markings on her wrists, making them vanish into the skin. Immediately Sakura felt her chakra running through her system again.

"Where's your partner?" She asked while healing herself.

"Gone." She chose not to question the cryptic statement.

"Where are we?"

"Near the border between River and Fire."

The fact that he bothered to answer her questions made her feel bolder enough to probe further. "What happens now?"

"When you're in condition we'll return to Konoha," he answered simply.

Jin saw her distrustful eyes. He was sure she knew it wasn't that simple. They ambushed and tortured a Konoha shinobi in foreign territory without any knowledge from the Hokage. No way she'd believe they were just gonna let her report this.

Earlier, while bandaging the unconscious medic, he had made up his mind. As far as she was concerned, he would stick to the original plan: wipe her memory from the last couple of days and stage an ambush by random rogue shinobi.

The hard part would be dealing with Danzou. Jin was still torn apart with the whole thing – his mentor wanted to get rid of him. Root had been everything to him. He still respected Danzou, and albeit feeling betrayed, could understand his reasoning. Someone had to oppose Tsunade's reckless ruling. The woman could not be made aware of these happenings.

The best solution would be reporting to the other elders. Koharu and Homura shared much of Danzou's political views, but took less drastic measures. Wary of the Uchiha, they would understand the need for his actions, but would not consent to a loyal kunoichi being executed. And as for Jin, he would lose his position in Root, but Danzou wouldn't risk making him disappear once the elders were aware of everything.

This way, he would not be punished by neither Danzou nor Tsunade, hopefully. Sakura would be safe, and Root would not suffer interference by the Hokage.

"We return to Konoha? Just like that? You do know I'll report everything to the Hokage, don't you?" Sakura wasn't defying him so much as stating the obvious – he must know she wouldn't keep quiet about this.

"No, you won't. You can't report what you won't remember."

Sakura witnessed enough of his skills to understand his meaning. And she was not about to let him mess with her mind again. But before she could protest, Jin cut her harshly. "You don't have a choice."

Sakura pressed her lips in a thin line, throwing him a defiant stare. He meant it - she would only stay alive if she left her memories here in this place.

But she had to let Tsunade know of this somehow. And Itachi. They were in danger with these snakes secretly scheming against them within Konoha.

She wouldn't have a chance in a direct confrontation a Root agent on her current state. This demanded underhanded methods…

"Can I have my backpack? I need some salve and bandages, and fresh clothes."

After a second of consideration Jin brought her the bag and turned to leave. "I'll be nearby monitoring your chakra. Again - don't try anything stupid. You have half an hour."

Once outside, he busied himself with the disposal of his captain's body while keeping her chakra on his radar. Kouga had not underestimated him in battle, but his mind seemed unprepared to deal with the full extent of Jin's kekkei genkai.

Looking down on the corpse being consumed by the white flames of the jutsu - one which would leave no evidence behind - he felt oddly detached. There was no anger or sorrow. Just a mild sense of anxiety deep down.

Once the deed was done, he noticed that Sakura's chakra had ceased for a while now. Straining his ears he heard no sound or movement inside, and then decided to see what she was up to.

The medic was on the ground. It seemed she had passed out from chakra exhaustion half way through healing herself.

"Sakura." He called worried. Cradling her upper body he slapped her cheek gently.

"Mm… kay…" she mumbled disorientated.

"You sure?" She seemed to have used too much chakra. Perhaps he had underestimated the extent of her internal injuries.

"Yeah… just dizzy," she breathed on his neck leaning tiredly against him.

Jin just sat there cradling her, listening to her steady breathing. Involuntarily, he rested his chin on top of her head.

It was amazing how easily this girl snuck under his barriers, how easily she made him care about her. What he did up until now was not short of treason, and for what? He didn't owe her anything. But still, he couldn't help it.

"I'm sorry," the words left his mouth before he could stop it, "…sorry for this mess." He pulled back to regard her, and found her green eyes gazing at him softly. She smiled weakly.

"Thanks," she whispered running her fingertips along his jaw.

Something clenched inside his chest when he saw that frail smile. Drained of resistance, he dipped his head and touched his lips to hers.

They were warm and soft, like the first time he had tasted them. The swell within his chest was so overwhelming that every rational thought was pushed aside – there was no Danzou, no political intrigues or shinobi duties.

There was only the girl in his arms.

In a moment they were both lying on the bedroll she had been resting earlier, tangled in a kiss. On the back of his mind Jin knew how messed up this was, but couldn't find in him to care. Not now.

Involuntarily he delved into her mind - not tapping on her thoughts, only the raw emotions. It was a conditioned reflex after years perfecting his kekkei. And within Sakura he found the same desire that burned him. But there was also conflicting feelings of guilt and sorrow.

At first he imagined those were about the Uchiha, but there was a nagging felling in his gut… He felt her lips tensing against his for a second, and then his instincts kicked in. He shot out his hand and grabbed her wrist tightly. He ignored her whimper of pain and twisted it so he could see the inside of her hand.

There was a kakute ring on her finger.

She had tried to prickle him.

It was hidden beneath the bandages covering her fingers so he wouldn't notice it. She must've had it stashed somewhere on her backpack or her clothes. The needle of the ring was likely laced with some drug. Her hand had been lying against his neck just a second ago.

Jin turned hard eyes down on her. "You little conniving-"

"Me? Conniving? Who the fuck deceived me into believing you were my friend? That you cared about me? Fuck you! I hate you!" Her voice was trembling and her face was twisted in an angry frown, but what surprised him were the tears running freely down cheeks. She tried to punch and kick him. And regardless of how weak she was, Jin had a hard time overpowering her.

She was panting, and her cheeks were flushed red from the exertion. Or from rage, he couldn't tell. For his part, Jin wasn't much better. There was a bursting feeling in his chest. He couldn't name it – anger, frustration, betrayal… lust.

"I hate you," she repeated in a weaker voice. "You… you were using me. I thought you cared about me."

"I do care about you! Fuck! Why do you think I'm doing all this, Sakura?"

"Shut up! Don't say my name like you know me. You were just using me to hurt Itachi, weren't you? I won't let you!" She twisted herself beneath him, in a renewed attempt at getting free.

"He's the one using you!" Jin yelled at her, pressuring her wrists against the bedroll and forgetting about her injures.

"You know nothing about Itachi. Someone of your kind would never understand - you use people! You make me sick."

Something inside of Jin snapped at hearing her words. Like Uchiha Itachi was so far above him. He squeezed her wrists even tighter, ignoring her whimper of pain. Looking deep down into those green orbs he saw rage and fear. He wanted to overpower this fiery girl, dominate her – each piece of her, her every thought.

Sakura rage turned into surprise, and then panic when the man above her harshly crashed his lips to hers.

Way passed any reason, Jin pinned her to the bedroll, pushing his weight down on her.

She felt his breath on her ear. "Don't move," he commanded. "Don't struggle. Don't fight. Just surrender."

And her body complied. His voice ringed inside her head, echoed in her chest, making her will melt away. The skin under his hands tingled in a painful and pleasant way, like white fire. When he tipped down and licked her lips, the burning sensation spread though her body.

"Stop," she crooned, swaying her head to the side. "Don't," she could barely whisper. Sakura knew there was something wrong. This was not natural – she did not want to respond to him like this. He was forcing his will on her. It was somehow like being pushed by a Sharingan, but she couldn't avoid it by averting her eyes – this was no doujutsu. It came from his voice, his touch, his scent…

When she turned her head, he attacked her neck, leaving a burning trail while whispering words she didn't quite process, but echoed in her head like a spell. And in the next moment, she didn't even remember why she was resisting.

Subtlety forgotten, Jin didn't measure the intensity of his kekkei genkai - he didn't want her fighting him anymore. He ignored whispers of conscience in the back of his mind. He just tilted his head and kissed her again with hunger.

When she kissed back, it felt like heaven.

- 0 –

Present day…

He kept gazing at the woman sleeping in her bed. Some strands of pink hair framed her face, and even in the dim light that came through the window, Itachi could see the puffiness in her eyes and the red tint to her nose. She had been crying.

Running his eyes down he noticed a stuffed frog held tightly against her chest.

Watching her now it was hard to believe she had been spiting fire at him an hour earlier. Itachi remembered her hurtful words, and the disdain in her voice, the rage in her eyes. Something in his chest squeezed at the memory - funny how she could always elicit such strong emotions from him.

But he had a purpose to fulfill this moment. If she couldn't be honest with him, he would yank the truth out of her. Pushing the guilty feeling in his gut, Itachi let his obsidian eyes bleed into crimson.

Sakura had always had a natural talent at deflecting mind jutsus, including those cast by a Sharingan. He knew it. He had taught her many of these techniques, after all. But if he took her by surprise, she wouldn't have time to react before he got what he wanted.

When her instincts kicked her awake, Sakura registered a body straddling hers and her hands pined above her hear in the bed. She didn't even have time to feel panic before her eyes locked with two spinning Sharingan. Confusion took her by surprise and she was at lost of what to do as she felt somebody delving into her mind.

She was dragged back to an old memory. A memory she fought to bury deep down within her. Suddenly she was in that cave again, lying under the Root shinobi, pleading in her mind for him to stop, even as she reciprocated his advances.

"Stop," she whimpered against his lips. "Jin, don't…" she tried to say something, but it died on her throat when she felt his hands tugging at her clothes. Squeezing her eyes shut and fisting the hand under his hold tightly, she called weakly, "Itachi."

The scene kept unfolding, but she didn't want to see that. She knew what would happen. She saw it on her mind one too many times. Why was she seeing this now?

Suddenly she remembered the Sharingan forcing its way through her memories.

Itachi.

The idea of him watching this brought her despair. She didn't want him to see this. She didn't want anyone to see it. It was too humiliating.

She pushed her mind against the strength of the Sharingan to no avail. She was too distressed by the memory unfolding right before her eyes. She worked so hard to forget it, but there it was, more vivid than ever. She tried to cry out in frustration, but the voice stuck in her throat.

This was torture.

She watched what Jin had done to her that day, and the events that followed. She could still feel the stickiness of his blood on her. She wanted to throw up.

It wasn't after what it felt like an eternity that she found strength to push against the doujutsu again. "Stop it!" She screamed in her head. "Please, just stop!"

"… stop…" her weak sob echoed in the dark bedroom as Itachi retreated his eye technique. He looked down, wide eyed, at large green eyes. She was panting, not even blinking, and yet, tears flowed down the sides of her face.

They kept staring at one another, not uttering a single word. Time seemed to stand still.

But it didn't take long for him to notice he was still straddling her, pinning her against the bed. And right then, it felt so wrong. Swiftly he got up and stood by the bed, eyes never leaving her. His sharp vision didn't miss the slight tremble of her body. Something twisted in his stomach.

The pink haired girl rolled sideways and sat on the bed with her back turned to him.

"Why didn't you tell me, Sakura?" There was an uncharacteristic tremor in Itachi's voice.

"Go away," she choked.

"Sakura-"

"Get out!" She tried to push him but Itachi fought, subduing her halfhearted attempts at hitting him. He wrapped his arms around her, trapping her fists. "Please Sakura, just talk to me." She slumped against his chest, her weak squirming fading out.

"Have I ever hurt you? Have I ever gave you reason not to trust me?"

He was glad when she shook her head weakly.

"So trust me."

They remained in silence, holding each other. Itachi patiently waited for her to open up, letting her take her time, soaking in her long lost warmth. After a long time in the dark room, it occurred to him that she might not be ready for this. But then her meek voice broke the silence.

"I was so stupid. I should've seen they were shinobi. They fooled me for months, and there were always little signs I should've noticed, but I ignored them because…" she hesitated, "because I liked it... liked the attention he gave me."

Itachi didn't give away any reaction and just kept listening.

"I loved you. I was happy, but I constantly felt like your dirty little secret, like I wasn't good enough for you. Honestly, what would you see in a seventeen year old kunoichi with no clan? And then Jin..." Sakura paused. "He was always around, always knew the right thing to say to make me feel better. Shamelessly pursuing me in front of everybody. I didn't want him, not really. But I felt flattered. Wanted."

She sobered up as she continued.

"And then after the ambush, the torture, he –" she paused, "I could've… I should've fought harder." Itachi could see feel her body trembling, and was taken aback by the anger tone in her voice. "I was supposed to be good at this. I should have been able to beat his technique. I was one of the strongest kunoichi in the village, but I just laid there and let him do that to me!" She was borderline hysterical now. "I let him. I was the one who let him rape me!"

Sakura was sobbing uncontrollably against his chest. She had never acknowledged out loud what happened to her, and until now she didn't realize how much it still hurt her.

He held her tightly against him, feeling as pained as her. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Sakura. I never meant to make you feel that way," he said miserably. "And don't believe for a second it was your fault. It was anyone's fault but yours. I won't let you put this on yourself. Do you hear me?"

He felt a small satisfaction when he felt her nodding against him.

Leaning against him, resting her head under his chin, she started to feel a little calmer after a while. "The next few months after that we were all threading on thin ice because of Danzou. Tsunade had a hard time dealing with him, and I was hidden, ordered not to say anything to anybody. Eventually she was able to isolate him from the Council and intervene in Root - which had a perfect timing since they discovered an imminent plan to execute a coup. After that not even Homura or Koharu interceded for him."

Itachi remembered these facts from a few years ago. It was so hush-hush that no even him, as ANBU captain, was fully aware of the events. Tsunade had told everybody Sakura had returned from Suna and immediately sent on a confidential mission with Kakashi.

"Kakashi was guarding you during the investigations on Danzou and Root," Itachi realized.

Sakura nodded. "Weeks later I realized I was pregnant. It didn't take much effort for Kakashi to realize how that happened. He was great, but comforting was never his forte. I – I didn't know what to do, and Tsunade was so caught up with the political mess. When everything settled down and we talked, we realized what little options I had. I didn't wanna an abortion, but when I was to show up with a baby, I wouldn't have any way to explain - nobody could know the circumstances in which I got pregnant."

Itachi frowned. "So, you never told anyone about what happened? Your teammates? Your friends?"

"Only Tsunade and Kakashi knew."

Itachi felt angry at the Hokage for forcing Sakura to keep something like this to herself all these years, to bear alone the consequences. Itachi had seen tonight how much it has been hurting her.

"But soon others will know," she told him. "I had hoped that Kazuki would never develop any kekkei genkai. From what I learned very few shinobi from the Yamanaka clan manifest it. They consider a blessing to be gifted with it," she let out a dry laugh. "Ironic, huh? I prayed everyday of his life for it to never happen."

"And the Yamanaka clan approached you to question about this."

"They'll want to know about Kazuki's father. That's why Tsunade arranged the meeting - she'll have to reveal classified information. Tell them about his participation in Root, about what happen back then… God, I can only picture Inoichi-san's face."

"I'll be there with you."

"What? Itachi! You can't! If Tsunade-sama finds out that I told you she's gonna kill me!"

"You told me nothing - I took the information from you."

"Then she's gonna kill you!"

Itachi seemed unimpressed. "Sakura, I won't let you push me away again. I let you fool me before by using my feelings. It won't happen again."

She twisted her hands guiltily. "I'm sorry, Itachi. I never meant to hurt you."

Itachi buried his face on the pink tresses. "You could've told me, you know? I'm ANBU. I would've understood the need for confidentiality. You didn't have to explain anything, you just had to ask and I'd be there for you."

Sakura snuggled in his arms, sighing.

"It hardly seemed like a possibility given the consequences. Tsunade told me we could take care of it discreetly, and I seriously considered it. But in the end I couldn't do it. It was a child - my child. I knew I'd regretted if I had done it," she placed her hands on her belly, remembering. "It was my decision to keep him and I was sure you wouldn't accept it, especially when I couldn't give any sort of explanation. So, once I made my decision I tried to let you go easy. But you kept pushing and pushing me. I snapped and blurted out all those horrible things. I just wanted you to stop asking questions I couldn't answer."

Her voice was remorseful and Itachi observed her trying to wipe her tears with the heel of her hand.

Itachi knew this was partially his fault. He never gave her any reasons to believe she could lean on him. A man who would not even assume their relationship publicly would never accept to raise someone else's child. "You never considered the possibility I would accept to raise Kazuki with you," he realized.

"I never imagined-" Sakura remembered the beautiful ring he brought her, and that she had thrown back at his face. "You never wanted anyone to know about us… I know how things work in your clan. They would be horrified at the idea of someone like me with their heir. It would cause distress between you and your parents. Your father would have disowned you, and Sasuke would be caught in the rift too."

Sakura said this with such certainty that a sudden realization hit him.

"My father talked to you."

She didn't say anything, but the way her shoulders stiffened was answer enough.

His father knew about them! Itachi remembered those veiled warnings about getting involved with the wrong woman. He knew that he was seeing Sakura. Someone must've discovered and told him.

"What did he tell you? Did he threaten you?" Itachi held her by the shoulders to look into her eyes.

She shook her head weakly, averting her eyes. "No. He was very polite."

Itachi didn't doubt that. Fugaku was the kind of man who knew how act corteous even while crushing his opposition. Didn't mean his actions weren't brutal, though.

"What did he tell you exactly?"

She tried to look indifferent. "He said I was just a fling for you, that if it was anything serious you wouldn't have kept a secret from your family. He put everything so rationally - everything your father said made so much sense to me back then. He told me it was all just for fun, but if anybody found out about what we were doing, it would bring grave problems for us both. He asked me to distance myself, for your sake. And he offered me compensation."

"Compensation?" Itachi frowned.

"Money," Sakura clarified.

Itachi clenched his teeth.

"I didn't take it, of course."

He knew that. The simple offer must've been enough for her to feel humiliated.

God, how much happened to her that he wasn't aware of? He should've seen through her lies – the lies she told him to spare him. He should've been there to protect her. From his father, from the rumors, from Danzou. In the end everything that happened to her was because of him.

"It was easier, you know? Easier to just push you away instead of risk hearing everything your father told me coming from your mouth – that it was all just for fun."

"I would never say that, Sakura."

"I know, but there was a prickle of doubt in my mind, and I let my fears take over. Besides, what would happen then? We were just gonna raise Kazuki together? Your clan would never leave it alone – they would have made my life hell, and it would have been even worse for Kazuki."

Itachi understood her actions now, she was sheltering herself and her baby. His attitude towards their relationship in the past only served to fill her with doubts. He had never been very outspoken about his feelings, and never took the time to explain himself, he just assumed Sakura understood why he acted so secretive about their personal affairs.

"I'm sorry," he cradled her face. "I'm sorry," he repeated touching his forehead to hers.

"Itachi?" Sakura didn't understand what he was apologizing for.

"I'm sorry," he sounded deject. "I should have protected you."

"You didn't know, Itachi," she felt tears escaping her eyes again. "I didn't ask for your help."

"Yes, you did. But I didn't hear." He remembered her whispering his name in that dreadful memory.

Sakura hadn't cried so much in years. She just kept everything buried inside, and now it was like the dam had broke. But it felt good, like washing away her soul. After all these years, she felt she could breathe again.

(Edited on May, 2012)