Past and Present Danger

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Chapter 22

Arthur didn't know how long he sat at his desk staring at the completed account of that terrible night. He forced himself to read through it once more, just to confirm to himself that if it came to it and he lost his memories, those words would be enough to assure Merlin's safety. He thought that they would. It was the most truthful and honest document that Arthur had ever produced.

Although the scroll held the main event that had happened on Merlin's return, it didn't retell the whole story. The following weeks had been almost as harrowing as the few minutes he had spent on the rooftop. Merlin did not recover quickly or easily. In fact, his whispered words to Arthur were the only ones he uttered for well over a fortnight. Gaius had been at a loss as to what to do for him. Arthur remembered the old physician trying to explain it to him in a way that wouldn't alarm him. Arthur had kept his replies even and his face neutral as Gaius explained his suspicions, but inwardly he had been reeling. He had to fight age old prejudices and his own certainties in order to view Merlin as something different to the countless evil sorcerers that he had come into contact with throughout his life.

Gaius' guesses were that somehow Merlin's non-existent recovery was due to a magical ailment and not a physical one. Arthur could understand how the conclusion had been reached. While Merlin appeared to be completely healthy, terrible tremors would rack his body regularly, similar to the ones that Arthur had witnessed on the roof. Nothing Gaius did seemed to be able to stop them and he could not explain them.

'Gaius,' Arthur had begun hesitantly one morning, two weeks after the events on the battlements. The old man looked at him, tired and aged. 'Could Merlin…I mean…' he sighed and tried to find the words. 'You knew about Merlin, didn't you?' he tried. Up until now, the topic had not been breached. Even after Merlin's disappearance Arthur had given Gaius the benefit of the doubt. He had told himself that if Merlin could lie to his King, then he could lie to Gaius, but deep down Arthur knew that he couldn't face the possibility that his old friend had known about Merlin's magic all along.

'I think you already know the answer, Sire,' Gaius replied evenly.

'Did he…could he…?' He stood up, getting frustrated by his lack of eloquence. 'Is he as powerful as we saw on the roof? Is he really that strong?'

'He is powerful, Sire,' Gaius answered after a moment. 'Merlin is not someone who just dabbles in magic and can cast a few enchantments. One day he will rival and surpass the likes of Morgause, Nimueh…Morgana. He may do already.'

Arthur fought against the accusations, anger and fear that bubbled up in him. He had already made up his mind that Merlin was good and was loyal to him; it was just taking time for that knowledge to cement itself.

'So you knew he could do this? You weren't surprised?'

'Quite the opposite, actually,' Gaius began heavily.

'What do you mean?'

'Merlin is powerful, yes, but not to the extent that we saw when he fought the darkness. He could not have done that six months ago.'

'What are you saying?'

'I believe that Merlin somehow managed to increase his magical potential, but I'm not sure his body or his mind were ready for it.'

'Why would he…?' he began, but realisation came quickly. 'He knew he would need more power to defeat the dark magic.' The words came out quietly, guiltily.

'I don't know if that is what happened, but it would explain why he is not recovering. His body can not cope with these new levels of magical power.' As if to emphasise Gaius' point, Merlin suddenly trembled violently. Arthur saw the strain then; the way his body was fighting against pain and pressure.

It had been another few days before Merlin showed any signs of waking up and when he finally did, he was wracked with blinding headaches and terrible seizures. He had been unable to use his magic for several more weeks; any attempt to do so sent his body into convulsions.

As disconcerting as that was for Merlin, it actually made Arthur's transition from hater-of-magic to friend-of–the-most-powerful-sorcerer-of-the-age far more manageable. He took the time to rewrite and readdress Camelot's laws against magic. He actively involved Merlin in the process, asking for his opinion and getting him to explain things, without ever having to witness his friend's use of magic. It had made it easier for him to accept the truth and embrace it.

Arthur shook his head as he remembered those weeks. No, he didn't need to include those in his memories. It was the rooftop that had changed everything. Anything that happened after that was purely an inevitability.

He rolled the scroll up and settled it in a pocket on the inside of his jacket. If that didn't work, then nothing would. It was all he needed to prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that he had Merlin's unwavering loyalty for good.

A knock at the door drew him from his thoughts.

'Come in.'

The door opened and an incredibly nervous looking guard appeared at the door.

'What is it?'

'Sire, the boy being held in the dungeons has escaped.'

Arthur felt his eyes narrow in anger. He may have Merlin's unwavering loyalty, but having his unquestioning obedience was something else entirely.

'I know where he is,' he all but growled, before storming his way out of his chambers.

'So you decided to leave the dungeons after all then?' Merlin grinned as he saw Arthur running towards him.

'I thought you said I was invisible?' he scowled, instead of answering the question. Was Merlin always so…happy? Surely he didn't have to grin and smile at everything, especially when it came to defying a direct order from the King.

'Not to me. Come on, we have to go.' He indicated his horse. She was saddled and standing patiently in the courtyard. There were bags and supplies loaded onto her side. Arthur looked at her dubiously; she hardly looked like a horse that was built for stamina, but Merlin made no comment on Arthur's reluctance and so he trudged forward and pulled himself into the saddle.

Climbing up behind him, Merlin grabbed the reigns and clicked her into a gentle trot, but he didn't seem to be heading out of the courtyard.

'Where are you going? I thought we were leaving the city.'

'We are. I'm just waiting for our bodyguard.' Arthur was about to comment on the fact that he didn't think either of them needed a bodyguard before he remembered that Merlin was technically ill and liable to faint at any moment. Perhaps a bodyguard –or chaperone- would be a good thing; Arthur doubted he could haul the sorcerer back to Camelot if he collapsed, even if he was thin and scrawny. Just like young Merlin. The thought slipped across Arthur's mind before he could stop it.

'Now,' Merlin was saying, 'I know you like the sound of your own voice…' Arthur opened his mouth to argue, but worried that speaking would only prove Merlin's point, '…but the spell only makes you invisible; it won't stop anyone from hearing you and I don't want to have to explain why there's a voice coming from nowhere.'

'Fine,' Arthur muttered.

'Good. I have to say, you're much more agreeable than Arthur, King Arthur that is. Now you are anyway. Up until now I've actually preferred old you, but currently you've got the edge,' Merlin mused, half to himself, half to Arthur. Arthur rolled his eyes. Did he always go on about such unimportant things? 'Ah,' he continued, there's Elyan. Let's go.'

'Won't the King just follow you wherever you're going?' Arthur asked. Surely the guards would be on their way to the King now. He was surprised the warning bell hadn't sounded, but perhaps they didn't want to alarm Camelot's citizens over an escaped child.

'I thought I told you you had to be quiet.'

'No-one's even close to us,' Arthur replied irritably.

'Well there's no harm practising,' Merlin whispered. 'If you must know, I've convinced the horses that they don't want to ride anywhere today. Between us we've got the last two moving horses in the city.'

Arthur was going to make some comment on how stupid that plan was -surely the spell wouldn't last once Merlin was further away and even so, there were plenty of people with horses in the city- but they had reached the other knight and were now heading towards the gate at a canter. Arthur settled himself down for what he assumed would be a short ride before the guards caught up with them and threw him back into the dungeons. The King would probably throw Merlin in as well after this.

But as the minutes wore on and Camelot disappeared behind them to be replaced by thick, fresh foliage and the dull thud of hooves on soft dirt, Arthur began to believe that Merlin genuinely had managed to convince the horses not to move anywhere.

How could he be allowed to do all of these things? Surely the King was worried that Merlin would take over; he had too much power in Arthur's opinion. It wouldn't be so bad if he could be trusted to follow orders and obey the King's every word, but Merlin didn't seem to do that at all. He disobeyed orders and he challenged the King's decisions. On top of that, he didn't seem to treat his leader with anything like the respect that he should. How could the King allow Merlin to have so much sway over him and over Camelot?

Arthur definitely wasn't convinced that he trusted the man who was currently sat behind him on the horse, leading him somewhere in the woods having just broken him out of prison. But in the end it still came down to the one fact that Arthur just couldn't ignore. Merlin was a sorcerer. He shook the thought away. If he dwelt on it too long he would forget all that he had learnt so far about magic and about Merlin and about the part it currently played in Camelot.

The ride was only a couple of hours, but by the end of it Arthur felt tired. He didn't think that not talking would be such hard work, but he was finding it to be incredibly difficult. He wanted to ask where they were going, what they were going to do once they got there, how Merlin was going to use him to help speed up the process of casting spells. Arthur shuddered. Maybe he didn't want to know about all of those things. But regardless, he was still finding the current banishment on talking difficult. So much so, that when they finally arrived in the all-to-familiar clearing, Arthur couldn't help but breathe a sigh of relief.

Instantly Elyan stopped and looked over at Merlin suspiciously.

'Did you hear that?' he asked Merlin.

'Hear what?' Merlin shrugged and Arthur felt a prod in his back, which he was assumed Merlin's way of telling him he wasn't impressed. 'No,' he continued. 'I didn't hear anything, not a thing. Nothing at all.'

Arthur rolled his eyes. How could Merlin ever have lied about anything, let alone being a sorcerer? The King must really have been stupid to miss that. Arthur was smiling smugly at the thought until the implication of his words on his own intelligence became clearer. He changed his mind: Merlin was an excellent liar.

'Merlin,' Elyan carried on. 'Why do I have the feeling you're doing something wrong?'

Now it was Merlin's time to sigh. He muttered a few words and although Arthur felt no change, he watched Elyan's register confusion, then shock and then resignation. He was no longer invisible.

'Isn't he supposed to be in the dungeons?'

'I thought he could do with some fresh air.'

'Merlin, Arthur will not be happy.'

'Well he'll be less happy if I take ages trying to work out Morgana's spells because I didn't have the Prince here with me.'

'I should take him back.'

'Please Elyan. I need him here.'

'Merlin.'

'Think about it,' Merlin continued. 'When has Arthur ever been right about magical issues?'

'That's not the point,' Elyan muttered, but he seemed to be loosing his conviction.

'If you want I can enchant you and then you'll be innocent of all charges when Arthur arrives,' Merlin suggested. The grin on his face proved that the comment was said in jest, but Arthur felt a cold chill rip through him at the words.

'No!' he said, much more forcefully than he had intended to. The two men looked at him with frowns on their faces. 'I mean…I don't think you should do that.'

'Of course I'm not going to do that,' Merlin replied.

'Well then why say it?' Arthur huffed, dismounting from the horse and heading across the clearing.

'Do you really think Arthur will mind me taking an argumentative, angry Prince off his hands for a few hours?' Merlin asked Elyan in a matter-of-fact tone. Arthur scowled at the words and carried on walking.

Arthur was bored. Very, very bored. He didn't know how long they had been in the clearing now, but judging from the way the sun was sinking to kiss the horizon it had to be several hours. And there was nothing to do. Not a single thing. He had spent the majority of the time wandering around the edges of the clearing, swinging stray branches that he had found against the thick trunks, wishing he knew what had happened to his training sword, and trying desperately to ignore the fact that Merlin was casting spell after spell.

Arthur could cope with being in the clearing for hours; he could cope with being bored, but he couldn't cope with the revelation that powerful magic was being carried out in very close proximity to him. Every time he forgot that he was supposed to be avoiding looking at Merlin, Arthur would catch sight of the man with his arms outstretched and his eyes glowing gold while his lips muttered words that didn't make any sense. He wasn't sure what Merlin was doing. Sometimes he crouched on the ground to cast spells, at other times his focus was on the pendant, and at other times he just seemed to be staring into the sky, but wherever he was, the use of magic was evident and Arthur was finding it immensely hard to remember the fact that Merlin had treated him nicely and was good and was somebody that the King believed in.

It was hard. So hard. He was torn between wanting to find out more and wanting to give into his fear and just steal a horse and ride back to Camelot so he could be put back safely into the dungeons. Only the fact that he was stubborn and determined to act like a prince kept him from doing the latter. He would just have to trust that Merlin wouldn't hurt him.

During the first few hours, Arthur had tried to pass the time by talking to the knight that had come with them: Elyan. Merlin had, at that moment, decided to take a break from his spell casting and so came and joined them.

'What family are you from?' Arthur had asked the knight. He didn't recognise the man at all; there weren't any children from his time that looked like Elyan.

'Oh, he's related to royalty,' Merlin assured Arthur, but there was something so serious in his voice that Arthur felt a little suspicious.

'Are you really?' Arthur asked Elyan.

'I suppose I am.'

'His sister's married to a King.'

'Which King?' Arthur pressed.

'Arthur,' Merlin grinned. 'Let me introduce you to your brother-in-law.'

The amusement on the faces of the two men riled Arthur somewhat. 'You're Guinevere's brother?'

'Yes.'

'So you're not of noble blood either?'

'No,' Elyan confirmed.

'Is that a problem?' Merlin asked him, more gently now, but still with some amusement on his face.'

'No,' he snapped. 'I just think it's strange.' He had picked up his stick again at that point and headed back towards the edge of the clearing, only just managing to convince himself not to whack Merlin with it.

That had been hours ago now, though, and Arthur had gotten over the shock that not only would he be marrying commoners in his future, he would also be knighting them. He didn't like thinking about his future, however, not when everything in it seemed so back to front, and so he was left to mull over Merlin's use of magic again.

As the sun was beginning to sink below the horizon, Arthur noticed Merlin heading his way. Instantly he felt fear flood him and his heart began to hammer in his chest, like the pounding of horses hooves on baked earth.

'I need your help,' the man said as he approached. Arthur nodded and swallowed; this was the reason that he was here. He watched Merlin warily as the sorcerer came and crouched down in front of him. 'I've found out what spells Morgana used to take magical power from the earth and I know how she used the pendant. I've put my own spells in place based on hers, so that when the time comes to send you back, I'll be able to do it.' He was talking slowly and calmly and with much more seriousness than Arthur had come to expect from him. It made him nervous. 'But when Morgana pulled you through, she left magical traces on you, which, if I can find them, will help me to send you and Merlin back to exactly the right time and place so that you'll be safe. To find them I need to use magic on you.'

Arthur opened his mouth to reply, but the words caught in his throat. He felt weak and dizzy all of a sudden. Use magic on him? Put a spell on him? The very idea made him tremble. He tried to reply again, but his throat felt like it had closed up. He felt Merlin's hand gently squeeze his shoulder and Arthur realised how rigidly he was holding himself. His arms were like stone, fixed to his side and his back was so straight that it was beginning to ache. He tried to relax, but the deep breaths he intended to take turned into short sharp ones which he was unable to control.

'Arthur.' He could hear Merlin's voice, gentle and reassuring, but he was unable to reply. 'Arthur.' Arthur tried to slow his breathing. He was not being brave. He was being a coward, acting like a baby. He managed to fix his eyes onto Merlin's and take a deeper breath. 'Listen to me.' Arthur nodded to show that he was listening. 'I know that magic is something that you have been taught to fear and hate, and I know that it's difficult to watch me using it. You've been strong so far and I just need you to push yourself a little further. I know you can do it because I've seen Arthur do it over and over again.'

'I'm not him,' Arthur whispered, hating how small and pathetic his voice felt.

'Yes you are. And he's you. Which means that if he could get past his fear of magic then so can you.' Arthur tried to listen to the words, but he felt his head shaking.

'It's evil,' he managed to breathe out, but it took all his effort to do so.

'No, it's not,' Merlin assured him, the same calm tone; the same gentleness. 'It can be used for evil, but not by me. I will never use my magic for evil, and I will never ever hurt you. Trust me; I've given nearly everything I have to protect Arthur Pendragon, and I always will do. And you're him. You have nothing to be afraid about. You're the Prince of Camelot and I need you to do this for your kingdom.'

The words seemed to stir something in Arthur that he hadn't felt for a long time. A sense of connection to his people, to the life that he was living, to the future that he was aiming for. Merlin was right. If he didn't do this then it wouldn't just be him who suffered. If he didn't get back to the right place and time, then the entire future of Camelot was in jeopardy. He looked at Merlin once again and slowly nodded. The smile that crossed Merlin's face helped to alleviate some more of the fear that was still firing through Arthur; the sorcerer was proud of him, it was so easy to see. Arthur felt a smile begin to creep onto his own face, but smothered it as best he could.

'Good,' Merlin carried on, standing back up. Elyan, who had stayed a long way back while they talked, now came over to meet them.

'We need to go before too long, Merlin.'

'I know. We will do. I just need to finish this last part of the spell.'

He titled his head, indicating to Arthur that he should follow, which he did with as much bravery as he could muster. Merlin led him across the clearing to the place where he and young Merlin had been suspended up in the air in the sphere.

'I just need you to stand here for a few minutes.'

'What will it feel like?' he asked, forcing his voice to sound strong and loud. He lifted his head and tried to make it look like he wasn't desperately waiting for Merlin's reply.

'You won't feel anything most of the time, but you might feel a sort of tingle or energy at other times. Don't worry; it won't hurt.'

'I'm not worried,' Arthur snapped back. He thought he saw Merlin roll his eyes, but couldn't be sure as the man turned and walked a few paces away as he did so. Seconds later he faced Arthur once again and extended his hand towards him. Arthur took a deep breath and tried to focus on keeping his breathing calm and even. He stared straight ahead, not wanting to betray his anxiety, but as soon as Merlin started speaking he couldn't help but close his eyes. He shut them tight, not wanting to see anything of what was happening.

He didn't know how long he stayed like that, but suddenly he was aware of a hand on his shoulder. He opened his eyes in surprise; he hadn't heard anyone approaching. Merlin was giving him another smile.

'That's it?' he asked.

'All done,' Merlin nodded. 'You've helped me to link the spell to the correct time, place and person. Along with the pendant and the magic that's left in the ground, I can send you back.'

'Right now?' he asked, his voice loud with hope.

'No,' Merlin replied quietly, his tone becoming more sombre. 'This won't work unless both of you get sent back. I don't think I'll even be able to replicate the spell in Merlin isn't here.'

'Oh.' He bowed his head slightly, not liking the quiet tone that had entered Merlin's voice. 'Are we going back now then?'

'I think so. I'll try and keep you out of the dungeons,' Merlin murmured.

'I don't think you'll be able to,' Arthur replied as he looked towards the edge of the clearing.

'You never know. Arthur might not be that angry.'

'I wouldn't be so sure,' he replied, pointing behind Merlin. The sorcerer turned and Arthur saw him flinch. Storming out from the edge of the clearing was the King.

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