~Chapter 2~

Written by Edward's Eternal

Reference to Good Vs. Evil and The Cottage and a touch of Fatty.

"Excuse me Ms. Komma? We'd like to see this place."

I look up from my desk. Mr. Hottie, I mean Mr. Evil-Good, is back and holding out a listing. Really, did the room get warmer when he walked in?

I look at the listing, my eyebrows lifting as I read it. Who the hell wrote this shit?

Seriously?

Small, cozy, needs some TLC, maybe a new roof, cottage, in the woods.

Private, secluded, tucked away, great for weekend getaways.

No running water…but there is a stream out back…very…invigorating!

Nice trees…good sized garden… handmade swing in the yard.

Comes furnished…cozy quilts included.

I look up. I swear Mr. Hottie is smirking. "Why would you want to see something like this?" I ask, genuinely confused.

"We, ah, like private places... places that are… harder to find…"

"I'm sure we can find you something you like in our listings Mr. Hot… ah…. Evil-Good."

He shakes his head. "No. We'd like to see this one."

I look at the co-ordinates and my hand slips to the box in my pocket. The fucking thing doesn't even have an address. "It'll take a while to drive there," I inform him. Clickety-click.

"No problem. Tomorrow good?"

I sigh... and click. So much for drinking myself into oblivion tonight. Although after today's disastrous showing, I suppose I owe them.

I smile. "Sure – 10am?"

He shakes his head defiantly. "We'd rather leave at 8, if that's okay. We'll leave the kids with the Grandpa. God loves that."

I look at him. What, does he think they get points with the man upstairs by leaving their kids with the grandparents? I was going to tell him there were other ways of getting in good with the Lord, but decided, to each his own. And 8 am? So much for my run as well. But I smile like the professional I am and nod. "8am then," I agree as I give the button another shove.

*o*O*o*

The next day I find myself driving down the highway with the Evil-Good couple in the back seat once again. I glance in the mirror. And do a double take. I must have drunk more last night than I thought. With the sunlight streaming in the back window, she seems to glow with a pale white light radiating from her, while beside her, Mr. Hottie's aura is that of burning embers. "Jesus," I mutter. Their images certainly match their name.

"Yeah?" she looks up at me from her coffee.

I shake my head, startled. "Nothing," I smile. Why does she always do that? And how the fuck did she hear me?

She giggles from the back seat and I see Hottie lean over and plant one on her. Then two. Long, lingering tongue involved kisses. I lookaway embarrassed, and then suddenly wonder why I can smell marshmallows roasting. I sniff again. Definitely marshmallows and fire. What the fuck? And why is the temperature of the car rising?

"Careful!" Bella suddenly shouts out and I swerve, accidently clicking the button on the box as my hand darts out to stop the stack of paperwork from flying off the front seat while I narrowly avoid missing a group of runners being led by a small dark haired woman going down the road.

Looks like a motivational trainer or something.

She is yelling at them to pick up the pace and I watch in the rear view mirror as she jumps on the back of one tall runner and hitches a ride. I don't get a good look at the woman since her dark hair covers her face, but he looks vaguely familiar and I find myself glancing back at Edward. "Do you have a brother?"

"Fuck no," he says cheerfully. "No doubt the devil tried, but it only worked once! Thank Christ for that!"

"Actually, I don't think I had anything to do with it, maybe God did though…" she mumbles beside him.

Once again I shake my head. These two are a little wacko. It is like they live in their own little…world. Or bubble. A fucking hot bubble…

*o*O*o*

We stand in a clearing. "I don't understand. The cottage should be right there…" I point to the vacant lot. I grab for my cellphone before remembering there is no service in this God forsaken spot.

Edward walks around, looking. Bella walks over to him and I hear them talking quickly.

"Fucker is messing with us again… he knew we wanted this one…smote it… just for spite cause we didn't ask him to look after the girls... fucking devil." What the hell are they on about?

They hurry over, each taking an elbow, and drag me down the path we had just walked up. I am so confused. Another bad listing? In two days? What are the odds?

"Never mind, . We'll look at your listings. I'm sure you'll find us something," soothes Bella. "I have all the faith in the world."

Edward laughes. "Yeah, that she does! And she has the patience of a fucking saint!"

Out of a need for normality, I click the button.

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