Before I forget: thank you all for reviewing, I've been a little low on reply-energy lately so those might be a little late. Please, never ever think that they go unheard, I love all of them dearly! Just...tired. I am going to say there are two or three more chapters to this before it is quite done. You're even going to get a fairytale! Don't worry, it should all be fine :D

Chapter 33 has been really mean and difficult to me, I'm not sure I'm friends with it after this but finally it is long enough and done and I can move onto the next one. It wanted to be done at 1200 words which is, uh, way too short for a Samurai chapter (between 2700-4000 words). So I've been fighting with it for about a week and a half, I apologize for the long wait between updates. (sigh) It seems we're back to the old days of updates-once-a-month. I'll try to change that, I will! So, on to the fun part of the chapter, the fun facts!

Funfact: I don't think I've ever had a Samurai chapter with this much dialogue. Ever. In the history of anything.

Funfact: Remember kamishimo? Look 'em up on the blog (which I'll get better updated ... soon... ), they're there! This piece of clothing was also covered in a previous funfact, in like chapter 12 or 13.

Funfact: "You shall do nothing of the sort," is one of the oldest lines in this story, and was actually the basis of where I developed the Tenzou subplot in relation to Jiraiya. So, fun stuff there, right? Along with Sakura's sickness bringing Kakashi running home, "You shall do nothing of the sort," has been the scene I've wanted to write from nearly day one. I'm pretty stoked to have finally gotten it uploaded all nice and pretty.

Funfact: You know most of everything in this if you've been following it and if you just tuned in you'd probably be way happier starting at the beginning :)

So, I guess that was pretty light...

Without further ado, Enjoy!

Kakashi guided Tenzou away from the lord from Edo. Neither of them said anything as they headed into the house. They only barely greeted anyone in the living room, not even counting how many heads were there. Kakashi saw that Tenzou's face flushed when he glanced at Shizune, and he didn't blame his brown-haired companion—it wasn't every day that a man was told he was going to be adopted into a family by marriage. Besides, Shizune was a pretty woman, something Tenzou hadn't exactly been in the position to properly appreciate for several years. Kakashi was happy for him.

Pakkun barked once at them before Sakura shushed him with a swat to his side. The dog whined and nuzzled back into her side at the reprimand—truly, he was hardly Kakashi's dog in any sense. Kakashi winked at her just before he turned the corner into the hallway, still leading Tenzou.

In his room he closed the one shoji which opened to the yard and then went to the tansu where his good clothing was kept carefully folded. Tenzou stood awkwardly near the door until Kakashi motioned for him to close it. Kakashi chose the comfortable hakama and kamishimo that he normally wore to town—they weren't the stiff formal pieces he saved for special events, but they were formal enough. Tenzou was obviously uncomfortable already, there was no need to add to that with anything extravagant. He turned towards Tenzou, the clothing draped over one arm, with a wan smile.

"Here, let's get you changed into these."

Tenzou knew how to put each of the garments on—but on another person, not himself. So Kakashi helped him with the ties, the arranging of folds in the fabric, and with pulling the starched collar and shoulders out correctly. Once everything was in order, with even Kakashi's nicest tabi were on Tenzou's feet, Kakashi had him kneel down so that he could do the man's hair properly. The Hatake family had been poor when he was a boy, and until Tenzou had come to live with them Kakashi had been in charge of Sakumo's formal hairstyles. It was easy to remember the motions of pulling and tying hair into submission, despite the long passage of time since he'd last done it. However, a year of caring for Sakura's hair left his hands gentle, and he never pulled harder than he needed to against the few knots left in Tenzou's hair from the minor brawl he'd gotten into with Naruto earlier. He even found a few leaves and blades of grass that Sai had missed earlier.

"Father was right about us, Kakashi," Tenzou said as Kakashi brushed out Tenzou's brown hair into a fan above the formal knot at the back of his head. Tenzou's hands were clenched into fists on top of his thighs, his head bowed a little, and his shoulders were straight and tense with nerves. Kakashi didn't speak, allowing his greatest friend—his brother—to have his piece.

"You are as patient as Buddha," Tenzou continued softly, disbelief coloring his voice. His breaths were shaky as though he was trying to contain tears, and Kakashi's heart ached for him—Tenzou was his brother, despite the differences in rank that had been between them for so long. It didn't matter that they shared no parents, Sakumo had considered them both his children and had encouraged them to act like it. Kakashi was glad that Tenzou still felt able to call Sakumo by the title of Father. Lord Gama might pretend to deserve that name, but Kakashi knew better.

"And you are as much a prince as your mother was a princess," Kakashi finished, just as softly, when Tenzou failed to speak again. He put away the combs to where Sakura normally kept them—she occasionally bullied him into sitting for her to do his hair properly and would kill him if he misplaced the elegant little combs. Kakashi hated wearing his hair formally, and avoided it as much as possible. He brought Tenzou up to stand next to him, to get a good look at the brown haired man. The change wasn't all that remarkable if he just looked at Tenzou's face—he had wept a little, Kakashi said nothing of it—but after taking a step back, Kakashi could see how his former servant was made to fill out the uniform of a lord.

"No one would recognize you in Fujimi, Tenzou, let alone in the city—you look like you're on your way from your family compound to the shogun's court," he said, trying to smile at the prospect of Tenzou becoming a great lord in Edo. It hadn't been right, having his brother as his servant, but it had kept him close. Edo was too far a journey for someone of Kakashi's rank to make even on a mission from the daimyo—there was too much to be done at home to leave for more than a few days, really. These last few hours or days, depending on Lord Gama's temperament, were all he had left with his friend. His fully recognized brother now that he was no longer a servant of the family.

"Come, let's show you to that woman Lord Gama wants you to marry."

Naruto dawdled behind the group as they went inside, shooing Pakkun into the house before sliding the shoji closed as quietly as he could. He wanted to know what that old grandpa from Edo wanted with Tenzou—he wasn't about to lose his fish dinners on account of that old man. He crept slowly around the fence after waiting as long as he could stand—everyone moved so slowly here, and he was only just now starting to get used to it. He missed home less and less—his parents, Matthew and Katherine, had passed away shortly before he'd gone to sea and after their deaths there had been little to return to.

As soon as he was around the fence he ducked down to crawl on the ground lining the rice field. There was a walkway which would take him near where Tenzou and the old grandpa had settled down. He moved as fast as he could while still being quiet—he'd gotten really good at being quiet while he'd been in Edo with Inoue-san and Kanna-san. He'd liked them—Kanna-san reminded him of his mother a little, and she had been the one to rescue him from the choking smoke of the fire. He'd been crawling on the ground then too.

Briefly he considered trying to crawl through the rice to get even closer, but the reeds made too much noise when he parted them even a little with just his hands—and Tenzou would probably hit him on the head with the hoe if he caught him. And then the brown haired man would tell Kakashi and there wouldn't be fish for a week. Naruto was very interested in the continued presence of fish in his life. So he contented himself with listening in to what the old man from Edo wanted with Tenzou—half wondering why he himself had been forgotten, half grateful that he was no longer in danger from the crazy grandpa with the wooden shoes.

Kakashi's voice called out from a dozen or so paces away and Naruto barely didn't jump at the sound—luckily Kakashi had taken a different walkway out here, or he would have found Naruto spying. But he was safe, and he remained still, his face turned to the ground and his breath shallow and quiet until Kakashi collected Tenzou and walked back towards the house—although just as he was lifting a hand to begin backing up to go back there as well, the old man spoke in a conversational tone.

Right above him.

"You know, I saw you the moment you came around the fence and trying to pretend you weren't out here was quite hard—you are incredibly loud, Kamaboko-san." Kamaboko? Oh, the name Kakashi had tried to stick on him, only to fail when Kanna-san had mentioned that her head spun just watching him eat. They'd exchanged the name for Uzumaki after that, although they'd kept the Naruto bit of it. Naruto knew he was caught and stood up, dusting his clothing off—after the day she'd had, Sakura-san would have his hide if he got it too dirty.

"I was trying as hard as I could to be quiet! And my name is L—Uzumaki Naruto!"

"And I am Gama Jiraiya…now, my associate Lord Shimura was keeping you alive to learn about the country you hail from. He believes you to have died in the fire, and I haven't taken the pains to disabuse him of the notion—to be very honest, I did plan on introducing you to the vertical part of a cliff or the bottom of a river as I rode out here but…" the old grandpa paused for a little, apparently to let his words sink in for Naruto. Naruto had been quietly, privately preparing for when the old grandpa would collect him and make good his promise of death—this was the first he'd heard of a deviation from the plan.

"But?"

"But I'm losing two of my men after this journey, and I'm wondering if perhaps I ought to teach you rather than kill you?" He put a hand dusty with charcoal up to his face, grasped his chin and started to walk a slow circle around Naruto. "Have you ever stolen?"

"No!" Naruto was shocked—his mouth flapped open and closed as more questions were fired at him. Surely, surely he was missing words, he had to be! The crazy old grandpa couldn't mean—surely—

"Have you ever hurt someone to get an answer out of them?"

"Have you ever killed a man?"

"No, no! I went to church every week, I learned most of my letters and—" Gama shook his head and ruffled Naruto's hair a little, getting soot in his yellow locks, effectively stopping his words. There was strange pride shining in the old man's eyes.

"Good, that means I don't have to make you forget anything—unpainted silk, and all that. Now, I'll start you on the sign language first, and tonight Sai will pick up where I leave off," Gama said as he started off towards the house. His hand at his left side twitched a little, the other was hooked at the thumb in his obi. Over his shoulder Gama called back, "that was me," his hand twitched again the same way it had before, "you'd do well to learn it fast, Naruto-kun."

"You look like you have the old-man shakes, Grandpa—ow!"

Rubbing his head where the old man smacked him, Naruto glanced to his left and saw Ume making her way home across the rice field. The old man saw her too, stopping and staring at her with a curious appreciation. Naruto felt something rise up in his chest, coiled tightly with fear and foreboding. He well remembered that his life hung in the balance at this man's whim, and risked it by stepping around to face Gama and poking the old man in the chest.

"You leave them alone, Grandpa, you leave them alone. You just take me and Tenzou-san and you go. Leave Sakura-san and Kakashi be." The large black eyes squinted down at him, reminding Naruto that there was nothing he could do to ensure this scary old man left the Hatake family alone. But he had to try, even if it cost him his own life in some way.

"I will do as you ask if…you refrain from addressing me in such a familiar way as Grandpa." Naruto's scowl deepened at Gama's dark tone and he poked Gama once more. It was better to die honorably than to be a coward, he'd learned that much from Kakashi in the spare months he'd known him. There was something slippery about this old man, and Naruto didn't like it.

"Alright…I'll just call you Pervy Old Man instead. Pervy old man." Gama's face went slack and then curved into an impressed smile before his bear-like arm engulfed Naruto. Apparently no one had ever had the gall to address him in such a way, and Naruto's gamble had worked out in his favor. Hopefully.

"You! Are you that white-haired samurai's mother-in-law?" Naruto did his best not to squawk as Gama called out to Ume, while still frog-marching Naruto back across the paths through the rice fields. Sakura's orange-haired mother drew up short in surprise at the man was shouting at her—tentative of greeting a well-dressed old man who had her guest in a headlock—before cautiously making her way towards them. Naruto wondered if he ought to struggle more or less to reassure her, growling obscenities that were no more than gibberish to Gama under his breath as he tried to loose himself from Gama's deceptively frail-looking arms.

Dinner was awkward. It was worse than Tenzou could ever remember dinner being. There were tiny, intense moments of discomfort he could recall quite clearly—when he had sat alone in the dark, chilly house waiting for Kakashi to return from his wedding to Sakura had been awful, followed closely by when he'd overheard Kakashi and Sakura discussing private matters, and a dozen other occasions in the last year.

This was worse. He tried to make himself sit at ease, as Kakashi and Jiraiya did, but it was difficult. Naruto and Sai sat together near the door out to the porch, getting into hushed, garbled arguments every so often—made worse by each man's poor communication skills— while the women sat around the fire pit and made food. The only one who seemed ready to acknowledge the weird vibes of the room, however, was Pakkun, the dog. The fluffy dog typically sat glued to Sakura's side, but tonight he trotted between her side and Tenzou's—he would stand up, shake himself, and then wander around the room until he found himself next to Tenzou. He would sniff all around the brown-haired man before letting out a short yap of confusion and going to settle down near Sakura once more.

Tenzou recalled days later that he had wished for something to happen to take the focus off of himself. Jiraiya, who had been making small-talk to the best of his abilities apparently, brought up his fascination with Sakura and Ume.

"So, Kakashi-san, your wife, is she really a demon? I might have to take her and her mother with me to Edo to study them in greater de—"

"You will do nothing of the sort!"

Tenzou had been with the Hatake family since he was thirteen years old, and had known Kakashi for more than a decade. He had never, until that night, seen Kakashi move so fast. The white haired man with one blind eye moved with deliberate gestures since his injury—he couldn't see as well as before—but all that was forgotten because before Kakashi had even finished speaking he was on his feet. Jiraiya's cool black eyes regarded the now standing Hatake man, while Tenzou could only stare as he realized he might be looking at a dead man in the flickering light of the fire and the fading light of the setting sun.

"Just having a laugh, Kakashi-san, nothing more. I am taking Tenzou, so why not the rest of you? Do sit down, you're making a scene." Kakashi didn't waver.

"You are taking my brother away from me, dictating what we do and don't do in our own lives—what proof do I have that you are going to leave my wife alone?"

"The fact that when my man Morino Ibiki returned from Fujimi, he did so without bringing all of you to me in chains. Really, the ruse you fobbed on that other man would never have made it past Morino's eyes." Jiraiya said with a tiny smile as he lifted his teacup to his lips. Tenzou noticed then the scene behind his master—Sakura pale, a hand at her abdomen, Ume sitting still and in shock. The woman, Shizune, staring blankly at the three men. Kakashi's hands clenched at his sides, and Jiraiya lifted an eyebrow before continuing after his sip of tea, "Sit down, Kakashi-san, I mean your family no harm and have no desire to battle such a passionate man," he said as he laughed softly.

"Soon I will be trying to reward your family for your loyal caretaking of Tenzou here, which includes protecting you from the boy's father. Shall we consider my blind eyes towards your family the first of these rewards?" Tenzou couldn't quite see it but the smile behind Jiraiya's teacup was almost feral.

Review?