Chapter Sixteen - Guilt
The weight is heavy.
But then it always is.
Guilt, regret.
Pain and sorrow.
All twisted together with the certainty.
My actions were just…right…necessary.
The life of a hunter is filled with unsavory acts.
Harsh deeds, raw deals.
Actions that are near impossible to justify.
Unless you lock a piece of yourself away.
No room for tenderness or concern.
For compassion and mercy.
Hard lines and harder actions.
A brick wall to hide behind.
To fortify your nerves when danger threatens.
The danger of caring, of losing focus.
Of regret.
A hunter can't surrender himself.
Can't feel.
Too much pain.
The End
bjxmas
October 2011
All standard disclaimers apply.
The problem with Dean is he can't not feel…and it tears him up inside. So he self-medicates and tries to avoid the issue, tries to mask the pain and deny the hurt. He is strong and determined, and conditioned to trudging onward…but what happens when he can't? When the toll becomes too much and the demands too taxing?
Comments? Thanks for reading, until next time. - B.J.