No Gray

by bjxmas

7.03 The Girl Next Door - A series of drabbles – Dean is in a no-win situation. A glimpse inside his head as he considers his actions. How hard is it to be a hunter, to make those impossible decisions? Last chapter is Dean's final journey to discovery.

17. Worth

Chapter Seventeen - Worth

I was never a kid.

Never allowed the time to grow up.

Seems I've been on this road so long.

No choice, no decision made.

Rolling with what was expected.

Existing within the maelstrom.

Surviving but never living.

I want to feel.

Want to live, really live.

I admire my brother.

How he's managed to find acceptance.

I don't know if I can.

But I want to.

I need to.

For Sam.

For myself.

For that child that never was.

I want to not only know the value in what I do.

But feel the worth of who I am.

The End

bjxmas

October 2011

All standard disclaimers apply.

For me, it all comes down to acceptance for Dean and recognition that he does have true worth, beyond hunting, beyond being a desirable man able to bed a woman…that who he is at his core is good and likeable. He is! Dean is the most amazing man and one day he will know that and truly feel it. He will look in the mirror and see the beauty of his true essence, the worth of who he is.

Thanks again for coming along on this journey. I love exploring this most fascinating character.

Just a few more chapters and this verse will be complete.

Later, B.J.