I do not own Star Trek 2009 or Supernatural

"Hey, that is so not me," Dean protested as 'Captain Winchester' ranted on a broad-spectrum channel, conveniently hacked into most major news stations about how the Romulans were a blight on the galaxy and they deserved to all be exterminated like rats and on and on.

"Maybe, but now you look crazy and you killed the Romulan ambassador. That's going to start a war right there. Congratulations."

"Damn it Kirk, I did not do that!"

"I know that. You know that. Sam knows that. Everyone on this bridge knows that. The admirals probably know that and don't care. It's a pretty good piece of video editing, you have to admit. Uhura, recall Chekov and Ash. We need to get out of here before Starfleet decides to come looking for the Impala's bridge crew."

"What about my ship?"

Kirk stared at his friend in exasperation. "That ship is now a crime scene. If I show up there, they'll arrest me for conspiracy to commit on principle alone even if I protest. Whoever this mole is, they want Starfleet's radical captains out of commission. We need to find Pike, uncover the mole and convince the Romulans that declaring war is a bad idea."

Dean crossed his arms huffily and stared broodingly out the view screen at his 'desecrated' ship. "Fine. But if she gets so much as a scratch – "

Kirk rolled his eyes. "Yes, yes, mother Winchester. I will help you take it out of the culprits' doomed hides. Bridge crew, stations. Stand by. We'll depart as soon as Mr. Chekov and Mr. Ash arrive. Spock, see if that file Chekov sent us contains coordinates."

Jo and Castiel dithered idly until Scotty ordered them down to engineering. He and Bobby could use the help.

"Chekov," Kirk barked over the communicator as Uhura reported Starfleet security requesting permission to board the Enterprise, "you and Mr. Ash need to be aboard right now."

"Yes ser! Actiwating transporter now!"

"Sulu, get us out of here before they close dock doors!"

Sulu eyed the slowly closing doors with steely determination, discarding mooring lines in a haphazard fashion that would later harrow his ordered soul with remorse. The Enterprise screamed out of space dock at a speed that would become legendary, scraping through the doors with only a few hundred meters to spare on either side of the warp nacelles.

"Warp five, Mr. Sulu," Kirk ordered briskly. "Well done."

Chekov had raced onto the bridge and was now tapping away furiously at his console. "Captain, I think we have a potential location regarding Admiral Pike," Spock volunteered. He and Sam looked quite satisfied with themselves.

"Explain, Mr. Spock," Kirk asked as a slightly forgotten Dean leaned on the back railing, listening with interest.

"Commander Vern took Commander Winchester – "

"It's Sam, Spock, we're Starfleet fugitives now."

"Commander Winchester," Spock repeated firmly and his eyebrows lifted slightly in amusement as Sam crossed his arms and huffed "was taken by Commander Vern to meet an older Romulan commander. Strangely enough, the elder Romulan is Commandant Kerlyn."

Dean frowned. "Isn't Kerlyn part of the more liberal Romulans, the ones arguing for peace?"

"You'd think so, but we realized upon review of current Romulan activities that Kerlyn hasn't been volunteering any proactive peace solutions. In fact, he never has. He simply agrees with the majority and keeps his head down. He could very well be a plant. Allowing me to survive would be his first slip up. Of course, it would be my word against his, but it does provide us somewhere to start." Sam concluded.

Spock took over again. "It would be logical to assume that a proud Romulan would want to gloat over an individual such as Admiral Pike. We believe that the most likely location to begin looking would be Commandant Kerlyn's personal moon."

"The dude has his own moon?" Dean blurted. "I think we're in the wrong line of work."

Kirk grinned and ordered Sulu to lay in a course for the moon. "We'll be heading deep into Romulan territory, Scotty," he added over the comm. "This run's going to be at regulation maximum warp, there and back."

"She's up for it, capt'n. We'll hold ye steady at warp 8."

"Estimated arriwal time is eight hours, fifty six minutes, ser," Chekov reported a minute later.

"All right. Sulu, you and I will hold the conn. Dean and Ash, would you relieve us in four hours?" Dean nodded. "Everyone else, catch some sleep, eat something. We're going to need all of you."

8 uneventful hours later

"This is making me twitchy," Dean grumbled under his breath, piloting the responsive ship through space. For such a big broad, Enterprise handled like a dream. "Nothing in my life ever goes this smoothly and certainly nothing this important."

"Dude, I get it," Ash sympathized, running navigational sweeps. "We've ducked two war birds and they weren't even cloaked. I get being comfortable in your own space, but still. They're sitting ducks" He paused and flicked another few fingers over the console. "I get it," he said slowly.

"What?" Dean demanded.

"It'll be a hell of a lot harder getting out. They're not sweeping Federation space, they're sweeping their own. They don't want to keep people out, they want to keep them in – if a Federation ship is caught going in, they can say "Oops, we were lost" and Starfleet will back them up. Going out, it's a little harder. Either way, sneaking in won't be a problem because they're not looking this way. We can zip behind that asteroid and use it as a blind spot. Getting out though – their line of sight is much longer that way. They'll see us."

Dean understood but there wasn't really anything they could do about it until that time arrived.

The elevator doors swished open and Kirk strode onto the bridge. "Morning, boys. How's it going?" As Dean filled Kirk in, the rest of the small crew drifted onto the bridge.

"Keptin, ve should stand by behind dis small asteroid," Chekov suggested, pointing out a suitable hiding place.

"Absolutely, Chekov. Preferably before the Romulans notice we're here."

Kerlyn's Moon – Kerlyn's Personal Residence – 3 hours earlier

"Why is it that I always get the villains with a melodramatic slant?" Pike grumbled as he tried to comfort poor Misaki. The secretary was a pretty young thing, very efficient at her job and a great deal of help to Pike, who hadn't expected all the tiresome minutiae that tagged along with the admiral's knots. But she was a civilian and had never in her wildest dreams expected to be kidnapped by Romulans. This was entirely out of her skill set.

Pike continued to hold her hand as Misaki sniffled and tried to stem her tears. He stared in extreme frustration at his useless legs. The physical therapist had been optimistic about a return of mobility but they hadn't gotten there yet. The most he could manage was a few steps.

Two years ago, he would have broken out of here already, commandeered a ship and made a run for the Neutral Zone. That was now out of the question.

Pike did not like the damsel in distress implications.

Shaking loose from that train of thought and thinking a little more creatively, Pike examined their surroundings. It was a blank, featureless cell. No video (which was odd) and no bars (which was odder). It looked more like an old-fashioned brig cell than a modern political prison.

Most likely, he was being held by an older, extremely conservative Romulan high up in the food chain. They hadn't searched the wheelchair. Romulans saw such things as a weakness.

Pike saw his as an excellent place to hide all sorts of little electronic gadgets. Prepping the passive recorder in the arm rest was the work of a minute. Producing a chocolate protein bar for Misaki, who was rather admirably recovering her composure, Pike settled in to wait. He was here; he may as well gather intelligence.

And wait for the Enterprise or Impala to come get him.

Two hours later, Misaki was starting to get a little angry about their treatment, to Pike's amusement.

"How long will they hold us here?" she demanded, fretting away at the little Tetris game he had kept in his arm rest pocket. Misaki had initially frowned at the toy, realizing how he'd kept himself amused in those very long meetings but was finally recognizing the appeal of the little device as time stretched on interminably in the blank room.

"They'll keep us here until they're certain we're annoyed, angry and more likely to blurt out something important."

Misaki blinked at Pike and he had to grin at the irritated look on her face. "They cover this at the Academy?"

"Yep. And I've been in this situation before. Managed to come out all right. We'll be fine." He didn't add that the last time he'd been in this particular situation he'd become a paraplegic. Pike was pretty sure Misaki was trying not to think about that particular incident.

The door banged open and Misaki jumped, Tetris falling to the ground. The Romulan guard snatched the game up and Pike sighed. It was getting harder and harder to find copies of the game. Of course the Romulans wouldn't appreciate it. "It's not a communicator, just a child's toy I carry around for sentimentality's sake," he tried, but the Romulan glared at him and stomped it underfoot.

"Damn it," he swore mournfully. Misaki started to apologize but the Romulan swung a disruptor into her face. Squeaking in surprise, she fell into a terrified silence.

"You will come with me," the guard ordered. Misaki sidled behind Pike, pretending she had to push the chair to keep her relaxed admiral between herself and the threat. Rolling quietly along, Pike could almost hear his secretary's teeth chattering together like castanets. Activating the passive recorder, he observed their surroundings.

Everything smacked of money, age and fine taste. Expensive, scented and polished wood covered dura-steel, the whole large complex appearing calm, quiet and organic. Doors slid open and shut with the barest hiss of pressurized air. Birds sang beautifully and Pike examined the sky. They were on one of three moons orbiting what appeared to be an uninhabitable, Class C planet.

Deep in Romulan territory then. Starfleet would have to send Enterprise and she wouldn't be here for at least another four or five hours.

"In here," the guard ordered. The big double doors slid open, translucent glass letting sunlight light the large airy room with a warm glow. It was really very pretty, especially compared to the dank, hot and dark Romulan ships. An aged Romulan sat behind a low desk, reading a printed dispatch of some kind.

Commandant Kerlyn. Pike was confused – according to Federation intelligence, the man had been a liberal, pushing for peace with the Federation. Unless of course, he was a plant, in which case Pike and Misaki were in serious trouble. The man would show no mercy if he deemed them a threat or conversely too weak to survive.

"Admiral Christopher Pike," the Romulan commandant began, setting down the sheet. "A hero of Starfleet. Personally if I had my legs rendered useless, I would have killed myself immediately." The gray-haired Romulan tipped his head to one side, exhibiting clinical curiosity. "Are you afraid of death?"

Pike heard Misaki's quick inrush of breath and reached up to grab her hand. "It's all right," he murmured to her and then raised his voice. "No, I'm not afraid of death."

"Then why do you continue to exist?"

"I have been informed that I will one day regain my mobility. That and my life's value is not solely determined by my physical state."

Kerlyn looked intrigued. "Naturally but if you are of no use in personal combat– I understand we did not have to post a guard to keep you in your cell – what is your meaning in life?"

Pike was insulted until he realized they could use the no-guard situation to their advantage later. "I choose to focus on the bigger problems in life. I take pride in my subordinates." And if they didn't hurry up to come get him, he was going to kick their asses, wheelchair or not. This was getting old. Kerlyn wasn't going to tell him anything.

"Ah, so you are useless." Kerlyn picked up the dispatch again. "Take them away. We depart for Romulus in thirty minutes. Inform my captain."

Pike swallowed rising shame and anger all the way back to their cell. Even if he knew he wasn't useless, the scorn smarted, bringing up memories of just after the Narada when he felt like half a man. He couldn't even properly protect Misaki, not that the Romulans were interested in a petite Japanese woman.

The cell door clanged shut behind them and he immediately fished out his little ear piece, refocusing with an effort. "Sir?" Misaki asked in confusion and Pike held up a hand. The little bug he'd dropped was active. Listening carefully, he started to learn all sorts of interesting things about Romulan politics. By the time they left, Pike was almost fully cognizant of the Romulan plot and what he couldn't muddle out immediately, Spock or Sam would have the resources to finish.

"All right, Keryln's left the moon," he stated, thanking whatever deity looking out for them that the Romulans were complacent and Pike paranoid. "Time to blow this joint."

Enterprise – present time

"Right. So that's the plan. How are we going to do this?" Dean nodded decisively, gesturing expansively to Kirk. "Pick your away team."

Kirk eyed the group in front of him. "Spock, Sam, Dean, Jo and Bones."

Everyone else sputtered or grumbled until Kirk skewered them with his best captain's glare. "We may be fugitives but we're still Starfleet personnel and you all answer to me or Captain Winchester, who has graciously ceded nominal command to me. This is my decision. The rest of you will stand by for extraction. Sulu, you have the conn."

"Sir, transporting in blind is not prudent," Spock remarked calmly as the away team headed for the transporter room.

"No, it's not but I don't think we can afford to take the time to snoop around. Enterprise is a big ship and that's an awfully small asteroid we're hiding behind. Also, they've had Pike for eleven hours and counting. I don't like those odds. Activate transporter."

"Aye sir. If there's any sense to the Romulan complex, I should be putting you down in a laundry yard. Shouldn't be anyone in sight. Good luck, sir." Scotty flipped a quick salute.

Kirk had time to remember the last time Scotty had said something to that effect (the Narada, actually) before they rematerialized and a Romulan disruptor pressed right up against his nose.

Right.

Arms training yard. No laundry in sight.

Peachy.

Keryln's Office

Breaking out had been simple. Convincing Misaki to come with Pike on his intelligence gathering mission had been hard.

But right now she was keeping watch and doing a decent job of it. Pike was busy uploading everything in the computer to his chair and realizing that if he hadn't been stuck in the confounded contraption, he wouldn't have had the storage space for all the raw data.

Glancing at the security camera, he blinked.

Kirk, Spock, Winchester, Commander Winchester, Harvelle Jr. and McCoy had just been captured. Swearing softly, he wondered what had possessed Starfleet to send both Enterprise and Impala before realizing that they probably hadn't sent either ship.

Which meant his protégés were AWOL.

The fact that they were willing to do that for him was very touching but he was still planning to tear them a new one for this stunt. Winchester in particular had been running a little thin on Starfleet grace (saving Earth only went so far with crotchety, dusty Admirals) and Pike could just imagine talking himself blue in the face to keep the wayward captain from ore runs in the Gamma quadrant.

And now he had to jam Romulan communications, contact whichever Federation ship was up in space and break his kids out of prison.

The day just kept getting better.

Romulan cell

"I believe I stated it was not prudent to transport down without first ascertaining the movements of Romulan guards."

"Yes Spock. I know you did. Thank you."

"Damn Sammy, he does 'I told you so' better than you!" Dean flinched at the stony Vulcan glare leveled his way as Sam bitch-faced while examining the cell door.

"The break-out doo-hickey?" Kirk suggested hopefully.

Sam shook his head. "They went low-tech. No electronic lock. We'd need explosives or acid. There's no keyhole on this side and it's a sliding door. I don't have anything thin or strong enough to act as a lever or wedge."

"Spock? Jo?"

"Commander Winchester's conclusion is accurate."

"I got nothing. They took my bag of tricks, the bastards."

"Great, so we're stuck here. Some rescue this is!" McCoy grumped from where he had parked himself on the bunk. "Now what?"

Kirk shrugged sheepishly. "They took our communicators. We could try storming the door when they come back."

"If they come back," Sam said doubtfully.

"What the hell are you talking about Sammy?" Dean demanded.

"Well, if I were them, I'd just leave us here to rot while they had their merry way with the Enterprise and Federation."

There was a long pause.

"We gotta get out of here."

"No shit, Sherlock."

"Nobody likes a smartass, Sammy.

Pike was tempted to swear under his breath as Misaki nervously kept an eye out for Romulans. They'd been lucky so far, very lucky. But hiding out in Kerlyn's office where mere Romulans feared to tread and wandering around in the open were two very different things.

And it had been quite a while since Pike had actually needed to use old-fashioned lock picks. "Sir, hurry!" Misaki whispered and Pike did swear, twisting the picks delicately.

The lock clicked open and Pike rolled out of the way not an instant too soon.

Spock and Dean barreled through the doorway, pausing stupidly as they scanned for Romulans.

"You damsels need a knight in shining armour?" Pike asked dryly.