I do not own Star Trek 2009 or Supernatural.
Enterprise – Earth – Currently hiding behind Jupiter
"So." Kirk clapped his hands together. "Everyone's clear on their mission? Excellent. Scotty, you have the conn."
Sulu and Chekov were dressed to blend in with civilians and the first to leave, followed shortly by Spock, McCoy and Kirk, formally and impeccably dressed in Starfleet red.
"You know," Uhura voiced. "This is becoming a habit."
Scotty glanced up from his console. "How's that, lass?"
"You and I, always left behind on the ship. Should I be concerned about our field qualifications?"
"Ah, not at all, lassie. The explanation's simple. Capt'n knows we're the only ones brilliant enough to keep the rest of that mad lot away from disaster."
"Really?"
"Aye, true as the Enterprise herself!"
Kirk
Kirk let himself rub his hands together in righteous anticipation as he stormed down the corridors of Starfleet Command like he owned the place, flanked by his two best friends.
People skittered out of his way like he had the plague and it was an impressive sight – a red sea of uniforms parting before one golden-haired captain with glacier-cold blue eyes.
"Lieutenant Reuter?" Kirk asked in his best implacable captain's voice.
Admiral Chandra's secretary jumped, turning away from his conversation with a rather pretty desk attendant.
"Yes," the thin, tightly-wound man replied, his eyes twitching from Kirk to Spock to McCoy and back again. "What's this about, Captain? I can g-get you in to see the Admiral r-right away if you like. He has a few fr-free minutes. Perhaps we should continue this in private?"
Kirk was immovable. "By the authority vested in me by Starfleet Command, you are under arrest for high treason committed against the United Federation of Planets and her allies, terrorism, perpetrating the kidnapping of one Starfleet Admiral Christopher Pike and his subordinate Misaki Shirozuki, impersonating one Starfleet Captain Dean Winchester and the hijacking of the Miranda-class USS Impala. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a Starfleet court of law. You have the right to fair representation. If you cannot afford a representative, one will be provided for you. Do you understand your rights?"
"Is this a joke?" Reuter managed to blurt. Silence hung heavily after the little man giggled nervously. Every individual in the immediate vicinity was staring in amazement at either the flagship captain or the accused.
"Do you understand your rights?" Kirk demanded.
"Uh, yes, yes I do."
"Very well. Commander Spock?"
The first officer firmly and impersonally spun the man around, slipping a plasti-steel zip tie around skinny wrists with practiced ease.
"Excuse me, miss." Kirk leaned over the console of the astounded desk attendant. "I need you to call an immediate emergency meeting of the Admiralty."
"Sir! Only admirals can do that!"
"Oh, right. Pardon me then." And Kirk gently nudged her out of the way, whipping through protocols, utilizing the command code given to him by Admiral Pike. "There," he said with satisfaction a mere minute later. "Now, you can tell your superiors I hijacked your station. With Admiral Pike's permission, of course. You won't be in any trouble. Please let the admirals know we'll be waiting in their ready room."
He was like a typhoon. Normally captains had to be invited into the Admiralty's ready room but Kirk figured he could use every advantage, including catching the admirals off guard by flaunting a courtesy enacted to ensure captains felt the superiority of their admirals.
So he parked himself comfortably in Pike's customary place after dragging a chair over. Spock stood their prisoner in the corner while McCoy downloaded their evidence into the Starfleet database as well as checking on the other mission taking place.
"Sulu and Chekov succeeded, Jim."
Sulu and Chekov
"Ve are da bomb!" Chekov crowed on the street as Sulu grinned ear to ear. They had walked straight into the Starfleet Database and inserted a very deceptively simple computer program. The technical aspect hadn't been difficult for the Russian kid who hacked Starfleet intelligence at age 12. The sheer balls of two known Starfleet officers walking in the front doors, down to the closest secure terminal and then inserting new programming under the beady eye of a suspicious security camera? That combination of courage and cool nerves was a little harder to come by.
The results of this little jaunt would ensure that the warrant for Captain Winchester's arrest got very lost somewhere between a requisition for the new Constellation's basic replicator supplies and a rather large quantity of bleach destined for Starbase 6. The incriminating doctored vid file would go straight to the top of the priority list for video analysis and debunking before heading straight to the Romulan ruling council as per two Admirals' 'request.'
Sulu had wanted to be Pike. Chekov hadn't wanted to be Chandra. There had been a very intense rock-paper-scissors war over who got to be which admiral.
Sulu lost.
Still. He figured he could let it go, since they hacked Starfleet Database and walked away unscathed.
Yeah, they were da bomb.
Kirk
Oh yeah. He'd just beaten Winchester's record eight admirals-pissed-at-the-same-time record. Yep. This time he had all eleven ticked, including Chandra. The only one who would like him after this stunt would be Pike.
Kirk dropped his boots from the polished oak table to the ground, bounding to his feet. "Admirals," he greeted amiably. "May I present to you the Romulan-allied spy within Starfleet. He's responsible for enabling the plots perpetrated by Romulan extremists over the past forty eight hours."
McCoy obligingly clicked through a very well organized trail of damning evidence thrown up on the big projection screen. "As you can see, he's been feeding information to the Romulans and using his position to selectively bump Starfleet intelligence about so higher priority information is buried until too late to be effective," Kirk continued. "He is also responsible for planning and enabling the kidnapping of Admiral Pike and the false vid of Captain Winchester decrying the Romulans. Additionally, he has smuggled Romulans onto the USS Impala and allowed them to make off with it. We also have reason to believe there is going to be a strike against the peace summit."
Those last two bits of information were loaded bombshells. "You mean you didn't notice that arguably the most recognizable Miranda-class ship in the fleet and concurrently the weapon of an ambassadorial assassination went missing? You didn't even consider that a peace summit is the perfect target?" Kirk's voice was starting to rise as a few admirals flushed pink.
Chandra rubbed his forehead wearily, Cartwright was turning purple and Kirk didn't have time for this. "Please tell me you have security present at that peace summit." His statement wasn't a request.
"We don't," Chandra replied lowly. "The Romulans insisted. The Earth, Orion and Vulcan ambassadors are exposed. They volunteered. And of course we considered the summit a target. But at some point we have to take a risk."
Kirk stood silent for a moment, watching various admirals squirm."Spock, recall the crew. Enterprise departs in ten minutes with as many personnel as you can muster. The spy is coming with us. Quite frankly, right now I don't trust Starfleet Command. You bunch had better pray that Admiral Pike and Captain Winchester make it to the summit on time. Bones, tell Scotty to beam Reuter to the brig. Feel free to stab the traitor with toxins, exotic diseases, laxatives, the like."
"In the best interests of containing the prisoner, am I right?" Bones drawled, his Georgia accent thicker than corn syrup.
"Whatever you feel necessary."
"Oh really?" Dr. Leonard McCoy smiled slowly at his prisoner and Reuter found himself wishing the very angry Captain Kirk had taken charge of him instead.
At least Kirk would kill him if he tried to escape.
Reuter wasn't so sure McCoy would allow him that luxury.
Impala
Well, there was one bright side to this whole Impala-hijacked fiasco, Sam mused as he fired his phaser with pin-point accuracy.
Dean was working off his explosive anger on the Romulan skeleton crew instead of Sam or an Impala officer and all Sam had to do was keep the Romulan bastards from stabbing his big brother in the back.
Piece of cake, especially since Sam was pretty pissed too. No one got to violate the Impala like that and walk away from the encounter with their limbs (or life) intact.
Dean Winchester brawled with the best of them, going toe to toe with physically superior Romulans and winning because he was angry, fast and fought dirtier than a bar rat. To Dean's way of thinking, there was no honour in this battle. The Romulans had tossed it out the shuttle bay doors when they had stolen his ship.
Half an hour later, he was nursing a beautiful black eye and a throbbing headache as the Impala hummed under his command once more, his battered bridge crew triumphant. The Romulans had been stripped stark naked, chained and tossed in the brig under a very watchful, wrathful Bobby's eye (when he had seen what they'd done to his beloved engines, Sam had had to persuasively talk him out of pitching every last Romulan into cold hard vacuum).
And the Impala was making a run for the peace summit, praying they'd make it in time.
"Incoming message," Sam said gingerly around a split lip, "from Enterprise."
"On screen. Hey Jim! Look who's back!" Dean patted his command chair affectionately.
"Glad to hear it Dean but you gotta listen up."
At the deadly serious tone of voice, Dean frowned and leaned forward, focusing. "What's up?"
Upon hearing the bungling of the Admiralty, Dean had to bite his tongue very hard. He made a habit of not swearing impulsively on the bridge. Loss of control was unprofessional and clouded one's thinking.
"All right," he said slowly. "Castiel, Ash – maximum warp. I want to be there ASAP. At the very least we can beam the ambassadors aboard the Impala and run the Romulans in circles until Enterprise arrives."
Provided they weren't grossly outnumbered. That knowledge hung in the air like a heavy stench and Dean scowled. Massively short-handed, going into a battle situation blind, this whole situation was messy.
But allowing the rebel Romulans to have their way was unacceptable.
Enterprise
Screaming along at warp 9.1, the Enterprise was threatening to fall apart at the seams.
Jim Kirk would not have the death of his first officer and best friend's father on his conscience, not when he could tear his ship apart to save the Vulcan.
Spock was as always emotionless, but every senior bridge member could feel the tension seeping off their first officer in waves. "Winchester will get to them in time," Kirk said quietly. "He's damned reliable."
He wasn't sure who he was reassuring, Spock or himself.
Impala
"Okay people, this is going to be sticky," Dean barked. "Sam, I want you to broadcast a communications-failure beacon so the rebels don't get suspicious when we don't hail them. Bobby, stand by on that transporter. As soon as you have a lock on the ambassadors, beam them up, Romulan representative included."
The Impala dropped out of warp, sailing merrily past six rebel Romulan warbirds that weren't supposed to be anywhere in the solar system, let alone in orbit over the summit. "Got a lock, transporting up," Bobby reported. "Ambassadors aboard, Captain!"
"Shields up!" Dean ordered.
"We're being hailed by the Romulans," Sam called crisply as their ship squared off.
"On screen."
The Romulan commander of the hailing warbird happened to be Commander Vern, who was practically swimming in his own smugness. "Captain Dean Winchester, you are in far, far over your head. You just kidnapped the Romulan ambassador. I'm going to have to try and take him back but your tiny under-powered clam-shell of a ship just won't be able to withstand the barrage. And then you will be dead, along with all the ambassadors. The Federation will go to war. Beg for mercy and I may keep you alive to watch the glorious Romulan triumph!"
"And then you will rule the world with an evil mwa-ha-ha!" Dean muttered derisively to Sam, who had to swallow a grin. "Just listen to the guy. What's Enterprise's ETA?"
"Twenty two minutes."
"What are the odds of us managing to meet them half way?"
Sam shrugged. "Not great but better than staying here to duke it out with those war birds."
"So I don't have to beg this dick for mercy?"
"Hell no. Tell him exactly what you think."
"Excellent." Dean shifted forward in his captain's chair, turning back to the now-irritated Commander Vern.
"Listen here, douche-bag. You've kidnapped a mentor of mine, dragged my name through the mud, hijacked and insulted my starship, attacked the Federation and broken numerous treaties. All of this I could potentially, possibly let slide if I really had to. But," and Dean's voice dropped an octave and several thousand degrees, "you condemned my brother to death on a Romulan prison planet. So there is no way in hell I am surrendering anything or anyone to you. Prepare to die."
He nodded to Sam, who cut the transmission. Clapping his hands together, Dean let out a big, relieved breath in a whoosh. "All right-y. Time to blow this popsicle stand before the Romulan gets his head wrapped around those insults."
"What about the preparing to die bit?" Ash drawled as they blurred to warp, narrowly squeaking between two Romulan ships and zigzagging crazily to throw off potential pursuers.
Dean shrugged lightly but there was a dangerous gleam in his eye. "It sounded good?"
Sam snorted. "More like if Jim hears you ganked all the bastards responsible for this fiasco he'd never forgive you for causing him miss out on the party."
"That too."
"Sir, the ambassadors are asking to see you," Jo reported over the comm.
"On my way, Jo. Sam, you have the conn. Don't let the Romulans singe our pretty white tail."
Dean strolled into the Impala's only large conference room and braced for verbal impact. The Earth ambassador was a petite, fiery woman who immediately laid into Dean. "Captain Winchester, this conduct is infamous! I am going to inform Starfleet Command that you kidnapped us and disrupted the peace summit! I will have you stripped of your rank and ship even if you manage to skate out of the impending murder charges!"
Dean listened carefully until she ran out of steam. "Ambassador Ringuette," he greeted politely, "Ambassador Sarek, Ambassador P'lek and Ambassador Baile. Welcome to the Impala. You will be joined momentarily by Admiral Pike, who will be explaining the situation to your satisfaction. If you would turn your attention to the PADDs in this room, I believe you will also find facts explaining my actions today. We will be rendezvousing with the Enterprise in approximately eight minutes. At that time, we will be forced to go into combat with six rebel Romulan warbirds. If there are no immediate questions, I must return to the bridge."
Nodding to each, he stepped out of the room again. One of Jo's security officers was stationed outside. "Lieutenant, I don't want the ambassadors running around the ship loose. They're under your care. Should this section of the ship be attacked or damaged, I trust your discretion in choosing to move the ambassadors to a safer location. Understood?"
The officer snapped to attention just as Sam recalled Dean to the bridge. Enterprise was waiting for them. As Dean settled into his captain's chair, status reports rolled in.
"Romulans estimated to arrive in four minutes, Dean."
"Shields at maximum, captain."
"Engines ready and raring to go."
"Excellent. Isn't she a sight for sore eyes," Dean muttered, eying the big Constitution class ship. "You know, if I were the cheating type, I'd say with the sort of trouble we've been encountering lately, it would almost be worth considering the shiny shields and phasers."
The bridge crew glared daggers at their blaspheming captain.
"If, people, I said if!"
Dean was saved by the Romulans dropping out of warp and bringing weapons to bear.
