Disclaimer: I own everything but their names.

July 30, 2001 – Santa Cruz, California

"I have clothes," Edward said, kissing my neck again. "Not that you need them."

My heart was all fluttery and my palms warmed. If they weren't wet from the dishwater, I was sure they'd be sweating. Deciding to stay the night with him gave me that shaky feeling on the inside – the one you got when you knew you were about to do something you probably shouldn't.

Even with the knowledge that Charlie's work hours had changed and that I could get away with more, I'd been so good. I'd made sure to be home in time for my midnight curfew every single night. But the truth was he'd never know I was gone… and if he happened to call, I could easily say I slept through the ringing phone.

I shut off the water and turned around, peeking up at Edward to see his expression. I'm not sure what I expected to see there in his eyes. And I'm not sure what he saw in mine, but he rushed to explain quickly.

"I didn't mean…" He closed his eyes and sighed. "I just meant that you don't need them, you know, because I'm me and we're us and I didn't mean that... unless you want me to mean that. Wait. Do you want me to mean that?" His eyes widened and he suddenly looked as nervous as I felt. "Jesus, you make me feel like I'm seventeen again."

I giggled. It was adorable to watch him ramble.

He didn't laugh, though. As the seconds passed, he just looked even more and more nervous and avoided eye contact. I placed my hands on his chest and waited for him to focus his attention back on me. His eyes softened when they met mine.

"Rambling is usually my thing, remember?" I teased, scratching lightly at his chest.

A small smile pulled at his lips and he huffed out a heavy breath. "I know. I just want you to know that I don't expect anything. I just want you here. I spend all weekend with Lisle and I miss you and I just… I want you here with me."

My heart warmed at his words and as nervous as it made me to accept, I did it anyway. His answering smile made my decision totally worth it.

Once the kitchen had been cleaned up and the lights were off, Edward led me to his room. Walking in felt like heaven because it smelled like him everywhere.

The room was smaller than the one upstairs, but the bed was most definitely bigger…which was a relief. I think I'd convinced myself we'd be squeezing into a twin bed up until that moment. Red, blue and green flannel sheets were messily pulled up to cover the massive pile of pillows he had at the head of the bed. There were dirty clothes in a pile in the corner, and bits and pieces of Lisle's toys scattered in various parts of the room.

There were surfboards in one corner and a black dresser up against the opposite wall. Once we were inside, he walked over and started searching through the drawers.

"Let me just find something for you to sleep in," he said. "You can change in here, or whatever, or I can wait in the bathroom until you're done."

Glad that he'd offered me a choice, I nodded and stayed where I was. I hadn't tiptoed around Edward in what felt like forever, but at that moment, I was preparing for some definite tiptoeing.

Once he found what he was looking for, Edward looked around his own room as if just now seeing what it was I was seeing. He looked a little embarrassed.

"I'm sorry it's such a mess in here," he said, hurrying to grab the dirty clothes from the floor and trying to kick Lisle's toys into a somewhat neat pile. "I should have thought of that before I asked you to stay."

I laughed nervously. "Stop. It's fine."

He sighed and came over to hand me the shirt. "Here, you can sleep in this if you want. I'll just…" he motioned to the door and then disappeared, closing it behind him.

Once he was gone, I had to take a few deep breaths. The idea that I'd be pretty much naked with him in the next room gave me goosebumps; chances were he was nearly naked too. And in just a few minutes, we'd be in the same bed… almost naked together.

"Oh god," I whispered, covering my face with my hands and trying to get a hold of myself. "You can do this, Bella. You can do this."

I continued chanting those words in my head while I undressed, removing everything but my underwear and Edward's faded black Aerosmith t-shirt. It was one he wore all the time, and I knew it was one a favorite. The fact that he'd shared it with me made me giggle like…well, a teenage girl.

It was loose, the hem falling to just around mid-thigh, which I knew Edward would love. He was a definite leg man. His eyes were always lingering on any bare skin my legs had to offer.

Before I could get too worked up, Edward knocked on the door to let me know he was ready. After a deep breath, I pulled it open and he smiled at me before his eyes fell lower, proving undoubtedly what I'd just been thinking.

The dim light of the room made his normally bright green eyes seem that much deeper as his teeth slid across the skin of his lower lip. "It fits."

I tugged at the hem and nodded, trying my hardest not to blush from the way he was looking at me. "It does."

His fingers slid through his hair, eyes landing back on mine. "The bathroom is free… I, uh—" he cleared his throat. "I left a toothbrush on the counter for you."

When I came back in the room, Edward had the bed turned down and was leaning up against a few pillows on the headboard. Judging by the pile on the floor, he'd taken off his shorts… and his shirt. The sheets were pulled up to his waist, leaving me with a glorious view of his bare chest and stomach. I still felt the same about the whole wearing a shirt thing: it shouldn't be allowed.

He was so beautiful it hurt.

He'd turned on the lamp on his bedside table, so I flipped the switch on the wall before walking over to climb into bed with him.

My insides were shaking; hell, so were my outsides and I hoped he didn't notice. I slid beneath the covers as Edward reached over and flipped off the light next to him, leaving us in almost complete darkness.

Without thought, my body turned to his and I tucked my hands under my pillow to look at him. The light from the moon peeked through the window above us, casting shadows on the planes of his face. It only made him look better.

His moon-lit eyes were cautious as he slowly wrapped an arm around my back and urged me closer. It was surreal to think I was there with him after so much time spent pining and wishing and hoping for it to happen.

He was mine, now, and as the warmth of his skin circled around me, I let myself relax.

"Is this okay?" he whispered, running his fingers slowly down my back. When they slipped lower, gliding across the parts of me that were bare beneath his t-shirt, I lost the ability to reply. His fingers were rough where my skin was soft and the friction between the two made my skin tingle.

As I hummed out a contented sound from deep within, I heard him laugh lightly, but it sounded off. Shaky, even. I looked up at him, straining to see clearly through the darkness.

I slid one of my hands up and touched his cheek, pulling his mouth closer to mine to kiss him softly. And that's how it started… gentle, slow and sweet. Hands everywhere… up, down, under. Squeezing, rubbing, scratching as we kissed and he rolled on top of me. His weight was a delicious feeling, but I wanted more. More, more, more.

"Bella," he panted, and I was sure there was no greater sound in the world. "Have you— are you—I, god, I want you so bad..."

"Yes," I said on an exhale. "Yes." I answered his unspoken questions. Yes, I wanted him. Yes, I had done this before.

His hands moved low and my body was lifted from the bed as he tugged my shirt up and over my head, tossing it to the floor. He stared at skin that was new to him, and even in the low light, his eyes devoured me.

"We're going to discuss that admission later," he said before lowering his mouth to my chest, forcing me to lie back against the rumpled sheets below us.

He stayed on his knees between my legs, arched over me as his lips wrapped around my nipple.

"Whatever you say," I moaned, burying my hands in his hair and holding him close. I would tell him anything he wanted to know as long as he didn't stop doing that.

I loved how his hands felt on me, how his mouth felt on mine, but this was even better. He swirled his tongue around the tip of my nipple, and it was nothing like the times I remembered with Riley. He had always been more concerned with getting my underwear off and pleasing himself.

Edward, however, didn't rush at all. He took his time kissing, licking and biting. He'd press his tongue flat and lick up my chest like I was an ice cream cone that might drip on the floor if he missed a spot.

One of his hands stayed on my thighs, gripping, driving me to the brink of madness as the other finally moved between my legs. My hips jerked as his fingers pressed against me softly, sliding up and down. It was the biggest tease ever having them right there with the fabric of my panties between his fingers and my skin. I could only stand it for a few seconds before I hastily pushed at the hem and started to wiggle out of them.

Edward groaned as he realized what I was doing, releasing his mouth from my chest to pull back and help me. He lifted my legs in the air and his eyes stayed on mine as he slid them up, up and then off. His mouth pressed a soft kiss against my calf and that little vein in his forehead pulsed as his hands slowly pushed my legs apart.

He looked at me hungrily, eyes dark and hooded as his teeth scraped across his bottom lip. I had to fight the urge to squirm. I wanted him to touch me again.

"Come back," I whispered, hands reaching out for him, but he held me off.

"Wait," he said, voice thick from restraint. The sound, coupled with the way he looked at me, made me tingle. And what else could I do but comply? Any girl would have been stupid not to listen to a man who looked at her like that.

I tried to relax my body, my mind and my heart, too as he finally, finally leaned forward and lay down at my side. His hand caressed my stomach and then lowered down, touching where I wanted it. He knew exactly where to press, where to squeeze and exactly when to curl his fingers in just that precise way that had my legs shaking and my chest heaving and my head all tangled up in a mess of oh my god.

As I came down, my senses heightened. Every breath, every movement, every touch, seemed so much more powerful. His warm skin against my arm, burning, and him, hard against my leg; it was a heady, powerful feeling to know pleasing me might affect him just the tiniest bit as much as it did me.

Turning my head, I pressed my lips against his and finally put my hands on his body. I pushed him to his back and sat up to take charge, crawling over him to kiss across his chest.

"Uh…oh, Jesus, what are you doing?" he asked in a strained voice. I didn't answer because I didn't have to, I just kept on going.

He tasted just like he smelled, all sweet and delicious. My legs straddled him and the muscles in his stomach rippled beneath my hands as I kissed down his body, taking my time. The sounds he made, all grunty and deep, rumbled through his chest and vibrated against my lips as I continued with no plan at all about what I would do once I reached the point of no return. I had never done that before, but if he wanted it, I surely would.

Hands that were curled into fists at his sides lifted and ran through my hair, pushing it back from my face. When I peeked up at him, his dark eyes were on mine. I'd always been too nervous to ever put myself in this position before, but with him, I felt powerful.

I smiled and playfully bit at his toned stomach, earning a laugh and a wiggle from him in return.

"No biting," he whispered, and my smile grew as I tugged at the tight strip of elastic around his hips, crawling backwards and bringing it with me. To my surprise, he didn't stop me. In fact, he seemed eager and he wasn't graceful at all when he scrambled up from the bed and worked to get his boxers out of the way as quickly as possible.

I giggled, falling back against the bed and covering my mouth to try and hide my enjoyment as I watched him fight with one leg and nearly stumble into his lamp.

Once they were finally gone, he stood and I turned my head to the side. My eyes were glued to the sight before me: strong arms, muscled thighs and toned stomach all met in the middle, curving inward to where he was all man in a way I'd only imagined the countless times I'd watched him in his wetsuit.

I swallowed a heavy breath and my heart pounded. The giggles died in my throat when I saw the serious, lustful look on his face. He moved closer, bending his leg and resting one knee on the bed. He grabbed one of my thighs and pulled me to him as he climbed over top of me the rest of the way. His hand stayed on my thigh and his body nestled between my legs. The awkward moment from just seconds before suddenly turned to tension and I held my breath in anticipation.

"No laughing either," he said, his voice no longer a whisper. It was all sweet-smoothness, like the first time we'd met that day in the shop. But there was that seriousness in his eyes there, too. All demanding and hot.

I shook my head as I felt him press closer, still holding my breath. Edward held himself back, and as he rested his hands on either side of me, I saw the shaking in his arms and the strain in his face that told me it was difficult to stop. I liked that he wanted me that much.

He took a deep breath and blinked as if he were deciding what to say. "I don't have… I didn't think this would happen tonight, Bella. I don't have any condoms, I haven't had a reason to in a long time."

"I'm on the pill," I told him, wrapping my arms around his shoulders and hugging my thighs around his hips.

He gave in to my tugging after only a few moments, watching me silently for a beat before he closed his eyes and slid just the tiniest bit closer. "You're sure?" he whispered, lowering his lips closer to mine. I could hear the need in his voice.

I gripped the back of his neck, sliding my fingers into his hair and pulling his mouth even closer. "I'm sure about you."

With a groan, he placed one hand on the bed above my shoulder and the other gripped one of my thighs to pull it higher around him. The tip of him touched me then, sliding slowly over me before I felt it at my entrance. I waited for him, trying to keep my hips from lifting to push him inside me.

The sheets near my ear rustled as Edward's fist tightened around them. He glanced down briefly before his eyes came back to mine and he pushed forward. I fought hard to keep my eyes open, on him, as he slid deeper.

During those first few seconds, where burn dances quickly into the intoxicating feeling of being filled, my hands gripped him tighter. A heavy breath slid from Edward's lips and I felt his chest heave against mine. Slowly, he lowered more of his weight on to me and moved even deeper until his hips were flush with mine.

Matching groans filled the small room. He stayed there like that: eyes shut tight and warm breath blowing against my lips.

"You're…" His eyes had opened, gleaming, and though he didn't finish his thought, the look on his face told me he felt the same thing I did at that moment—that it was like nothing else either of us had ever felt.

"You, too," I murmured softly, boldly lifting my hips and urging him to move.

His hand pulled my thigh higher on his hip. "Fuck," Edward whispered, sliding out and pushing back in quickly.

My fingers dug into his skin, holding him close as I basked in the glow of how good he felt moving inside me. It didn't take long for us to find our rhythm. Slow and sweet and then harder, until each of us was fighting to catch our breath and the groans shifted to grunts and the burn in my muscles was so bad I could feel them shaking from the inside out.

Edward held me so close and the heat our bodies created was nothing compared to the growing warmth his movements brought on in other places. Suddenly it all became too much and I lifted my other leg up and around, digging my feet into the back of his legs as everything got tighter, warmer and then it was all tingles and euphoria.

I cried his name to the stars and Edward fastened his lips to mine heatedly, pushing his tongue against mine and picking up his pace.

"It's too much," he panted against my mouth, shifting until his arms were under my shoulders and he could use the leverage of his hands to pull me more quickly against him. "Bella…"

"Yes," I moaned as his hips jerked and stilled against me.

His hold didn't loosen as we both lay there breathing heavily. Edward dropped his sweaty forehead to my chest. "I'm sorry," he mumbled with a slight laugh, and I was sure if it weren't so dark, his cheeks would have been pink.

I grinned like a fool; he had absolutely nothing to be sorry for. I'd heard people talk about the best moment of their lives before, and even at eighteen, when I didn't have many other experiences to compare it too, I knew that night would always be mine.

"You have nothing to be sorry for. Trust me."

He looked up and smiled, all white teeth and a little bit of tongue. "You're perfect," Edward told me.

And just like the night when he'd told me I was amazing, I wanted to return the compliment, because I wasn't close to being perfect, and neither was he. But I thought maybe we could be perfect together.

*peeks out from inside the bunker* I do hope I'm forgiven for yesterday.

Thank you for reading! You guys are the best!

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Until tomorrow!

xx