Cold Moon

CJ/Danny; mentions of others

Rating Adult – married sex

Spoilers through end of series

Note: in 2013, the December full moon will occur on the 17th, but the timing doesn't work out. In 2014, the full moon will be even earlier – Dec 6. In 2015, the full moon will be on Christmas, but I didn't want to hold off on this scenario for two more years. So, mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa.

Not mine, never were, never will be, but they consume my soul

Monday December 16, 2013; 12:45 AM PST; Santa Monica, CA

Danny Concannon stepped out of Frank Muñoz' car and walked toward the front door of his house. Said door opened and Li Wei walked out of the house. The two men gripped each other's forearm as their paths crossed, with Danny going into the house and Li taking the front passenger seat in Frank's car.

Danny locked and bolted the door behind him, and took a tour of the house, checking each window and door.

He entered the master bedroom. CJ and Yan Wei were on the bed, curled on their sides, their backs to each other. Danny tiptoed through the room, carefully stepping over the air mattress that held Paddy and five year old Mei-ling. He adjusted the blanket that his son had kicked off in his sleep. A slight whimper drew Danny's attention and he turned to the bassinet beside CJ. Caitlin had turned onto her stomach; with her knees tucked under her, her little rump stuck up in the air, demanding to be stroked, and Danny obliged. Then he stroked the red curls on her head.

Danny picked up the little girl and held her against his shoulder. As he played with her tresses, he reflected on the feeling he derived from knowing that his genes were so obvious in his daughter. It was irrational, he knew, but there was something so primal imbedded in him that took satisfaction in knowing that there was no doubt who fathered CJ's second child. Of course, although there were a few joking comments, no one doubted that Paddy was his son. And his belief in CJ's faithfulness was rock solid, even without the birthmark on Paddy's left buttock that mirrored his own. He took delight in seeing his wife's features in his son's face and height.

A little boy and a little girl, both products of the love he and CJ held for each other. He remembered the words Paul had spoken a little over a year ago, when they asked the minister to stand as godfather to Caitlin. ("Any child is a joy, but when God gives a man both a son and a daughter, that man is truly blessed. You take pride in seeing your son become a man, to carry on your name, your maleness, your connection with your own father and grandfather; you take pride as he takes his place in the world and lives the values you taught him; you take pride in his respect for you, for his mother. You take joy in seeing your daughter grow; you subconsciously try to mold her into your ideal woman, a woman who will bring goodness to humanity; you take joy in her happiness, even when it means that you are no longer the only man in her life. Of course, you take joy in your son and pride in your daughter; it's not a binary state. But I am so glad to have been given both, and I know you are also.")

Earlier, in the car, Frank talked about hoping that "things would be settled" by Friday, when Carmen would be going to her first formal dance since her quinceañara last spring. "I keep remembering that father-daughter dinner dance right before Maggie and Paddy were born, how excited she was. She's excited like that again, only it's over some sixteen year-old point guard with sixteen year-old hormones and not over me," Frank laughed. "I'm jealous, of course, but I want her happy, and I don't want this hanging over her happiness."

Danny imagined a sixteen year-old Caitlin, looking much like Aisling did that summer at Rehoboth when his niece experienced summer romance with the young lifeguard, and knew that when the time came, he would be jealous also.

Danny set Caitlin back in the bassinet, making sure that she was lying on her back – the position recommended in all the baby books, at least for now.

Danny quietly checked the windows and made sure that the long dresser was secure against the sliding glass doors out to the patio. He looked up at the sky, at the quarter moon that glimmered in the sky, remembering that four days ago, it was just the thinnest slice of pale yellow.

"Danny?"

He turned around at the whisper. He was too far away to help Yan, eight months' pregnant, get out of the bed, but he did rush over to open the door to the bathroom for her.

"Li and I just switched," he told her softly.

"Anything happened?"

"No, everything was quiet."

"I guess I should be glad, but I wish this were over."

"I know," Danny said. He walked back to the bed and bent down to gently trace his wife's jaw line with his index finger. CJ stirred but did not wake.

Yan came back into the room and got back into bed.

Danny took his turn in the bathroom, changing into flannel pajama bottoms and stripping down to his T-shirt. Then he settled down on the remaining mattress on the bedroom floor and began to calm himself enough to get some sleep.

The first rape occurred the Friday night after Thanksgiving; everyone was a bit more cautious that Saturday. Then on Sunday night, two weeks ago, there were two more cases. By Thursday, there had been three more attacks, and the entire town was in a state of heightened alarm. In the ten days since then, there had been eight more attacks. The police department walked a thin line between providing information to the public and protecting their ongoing investigation; they did reveal that all the descriptions and the DNA left at the crime scenes pointed to a single suspect, a white male of medium height, most likely in his late twenties to early thirties.

The men of the block had decided that they needed to do more than add extra locks to their doors and windows, more than install extra floodlights between and behind their houses. From sunset to sunrise, they kept a very obvious presence outside.

The men decided that the back yards that faced the ocean were easier to watch, and so the families whose homes did not front the hill leading down to the shore road spent the nights across the street. Two shifts of six men each stood watch. A car would be parked at either end of the block on the ocean side, watching the back yards. A third car watched the street. The men who weren't manning the cars slept in the houses with the women and children.

During the day, there was always one of the men sitting in a back yard on each side of the block and someone was on a front porch. None of the attacks had occurred in daylight, but the guys weren't taking any chances.

Danny was able to divorce part of his brain from the other part; from that perspective, he realized that the he and his neighbors had adopted a siege mentality, that they were forming a posse. However, the safety of the women and children were paramount in their minds.

The police, who had of course stepped up their own patrols, were concerned at first, but Frank and Billy convinced the officers that the group was not a vigilante force and were not armed. Should the rapist be foolish enough to attempt anything after observing the watch, the men would use their car alarms and light to discourage him. If it was feasible, they would try to detain the suspect. Between Frank's military rank and Billy's position on the city council, the police did not pressure the men to give up their plans.

Because the Concannon guest room was so far from the other bedrooms, neither Danny nor Li was comfortable with their families sleeping without a man in the room; they had piled everyone into the largest room. (After a few days, Danny found out that the other pairings had made similar decisions.)

Danny felt safer knowing that either he or Li would be in the room while CJ and the kids were sleeping; however, it did wreak havoc on Danny's sex life.

Of course, the middle of a crime spree was not the most conducive setting for romance. The three times in the past ten days that Danny and CJ had found time for a private moment during the day, Danny felt that he needed to make sure that his lovemaking was gentle and caring, that it conveyed a respectful request for permission to use CJ's body and not abuse it, to worship and cherish her rather than to exploit her.

There was a slight sound outside the window in the vacant nursery; Danny sprang off the floor (faster than he thought possible at his age) and went to investigate. It was Timmy Jenkins, going into Jessica's house. The Hammash's were staying with Jessica and Cindy and the two doctors were sharing duties with Wally, who had to be at the restaurant until at least midnight every night except Sunday and Monday. (Heather was staying with Hank, Steve, and Pamela; the live-in housekeeper was staying with family down in Long Beach for the duration of the crisis.)

Danny returned to his bed.

He hoped that the police would catch the rapist before Friday, when he, CJ, and the kids would be flying to Mackinac to spend Christmas with Siobhan and Liam. Paddy was so excited about the prospect of snow at Christmas, but was full of questions about how Santa would know where to bring his presents. Danny had also been looking forward to having a real Michigan Christmas. He had given his three classes take-home finals, and had finished grading the last ones on Saturday. Aside from preparing for the next semester, he was free until the middle of January.

Danny knew that his family would definitely be safer in Michigan, but he didn't want to leave the block at a time of crisis. But then, Drew Robinson would be home from Berkeley Wednesday and would be able to help man the sentry posts. (Radak Dieliczko, at eighteen and a senior in high school, kept insisting that he could help, but the others decided that he needed his sleep for school. However, they did make use of his tackle-build and presence during the day on the weekend.) And, of course, the Wei's would continue to use CJ and Danny's house, if need be, while the Concannons were away.

Danny yawned, and he fell asleep. It was not a deep sleep, as his subconscious knew that the safety of five people and one almost-here baby depended on him.

December 18, 2013

The Santa Monica police department announced that the suspected serial rapist was in custody. Several of the victims had made positive identification and the preliminary DNA results were positive.

The men of the block decided that they could discontinue their watches outside and that the "landsiders" could sleep in their own homes at night. However, until "they were sure", Drew Robinson would stay with Aviva and the kids while Wally was at the restaurant, and Hank or Steve would spend the night with Jessica and Cindy "just in case". Danny decided to keep Paddy and Caitlin in the master bedroom with CJ and him.

Monday, December 23, 2013; 1:45 AM EST; Mackinac Island, MI

CJ snuggled down into the warmth of the flannel sheets, the heavy woolen blanket, and the down comforter. CJ snuggled back into the more intense heat of Danny's body and sighed in sleepy contentment. It was so nice to be in the same bed, without anyone else in the room. It was so nice to be able to make love without worrying about waking the children. It was so nice to be loved by a man who was not concerned with making sure that you knew you weren't being exploited or attacked.

They had left Los Angeles very early on Friday morning, switching planes in Chicago and arriving in Traverse City in mid-afternoon East Coast time, where Liam met them. Danny had wanted to rent a car ("Especially since we're not flying into the nearest airport; switching planes twice with two kids just doesn't sound like a whole lot of fun"), but Liam insisted that it wasn't a problem to drive the extra sixty miles ("Especially since you'd have to leave the rental at the ferry dock. And then not knowing if the weather will be so cold it won't start back up when you leave. At least ours is in a garage, and we can put it on the heater block.") Paddy and Caitlin had been half asleep as CJ dressed them in sweats before leaving the house at 3:30 AM. (Danny had been counting on that; he had set up and decorated the tree the night before so that it would be ready when they returned from Michigan on the 30th. CJ had UPS'd a few presents up to Mackinac, but they kept the big things at home; they told Paddy that Santa would leave some things in Michigan and some things in California. With Hank and Steve's help, the tree at home would be lit and surrounded by packages when the Concannons walked in the door.)

CJ had enjoyed being in Michigan for Christmas as much as Danny and Paddy. The cold weather and the snow brought back memories of her childhood in Dayton. To be sure, not all the Christmases in southwestern Ohio were white ones, but the ones she remembered, especially the ones before her mother died, were special to her. Sledding with the children, making a snowman, crafting snow angels, and snowball fights filled their afternoons and early evenings. The days were shorter than in Santa Monica, since they were closer to the North Pole ("And at the summer solstice, the days are longer," Siobhan explained), but the nights had been clear so far and the moonlight reflected off the snow cover. Liam and Danny even made an igloo for Paddy. And when Danny surprised her with rented ice skates for himself, Paddy, and her, she taught her son the basics of the sport she once hoped to make her profession. Of course, once Danny and Liam started playing one-on-one hockey, the spins and single jumps held no more appeal to the little boy.

Paddy also found wonder in being able to keep beverages and some food outside on the screened in porch. So far, he hadn't tried to lick a cold metal pole. He did play "Iditarod" with a big cardboard box and Siobhan and Liam's two Malamutes (George and Gracie). Tomorrow, Liam and Danny would take Paddy ice fishing.

CJ and Danny had agreed that, for the most part, Christmases should be spent at home, but she was glad that the family was having this experience. The only fly in the ointment was that Caitlin was too young to remember it. Maybe they would make a similar trip in a few years.

Suddenly, CJ felt Danny's hand move from her stomach (just below her waist) to her breast and felt his lips nuzzle just behind her ear. She turned around in the bed to face him; after the past three weeks, making love a second time within three hours sounded like a very good idea.

But Danny sat up and got out of bed. "Let's go outside," he told her, reaching for her hand.

Danny was putting on a pair of wool socks and a set of sweats. CJ had put on her sweatshirt and socks and was reaching for her sweatpants when Danny stopped her.

"Put on the jumper."

When they had arrived on Friday, CJ had admired Siobhan's floor-length jumper. It was made of boiled wool and seemed to be just the thing for cold winter days. That evening, Siobhan handed CJ "an early Christmas present", which CJ gratefully accepted.

Mystified, CJ followed her husband's instructions, and, after a quick check on the kids in the next room, they crept down the stairs, where they put on their boots, coats, and gloves. Danny picked up a fleece throw and, taking her hand, led her outside.

As Danny led her past the garage toward the back of the property, CJ was reminded of Clement Moore's poem.

"The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow gave a luster of midday to objects below."

Earlier in the day, Siobhan mentioned that tonight was the December full moon. "Cold Moon," Liam said. Then he explained that the Native Americans had named each of the full moons of the year.

Danny put an arm to CJ's waist to help her through some of the drifts in the field behind the garage. Finally, he reached a small stand of trees and once they were on the other side of them, they were near the wide open sledding hill. Danny spread the throw on the snow, knelt down on it, and pulled CJ down beside him.

Danny began to kiss her face, gently at first, and then with increasing passion. He removed one of his gloves and tested his hand on his face before slipping it under CJ's jumper, above the edge of her boot and sock. Slowly teasing up her thigh, he reached her underwear and began to slip them down her legs.

"Danny?"

"Call me crazy, but -"

"Hi there, Crazy."

"I just felt we had to do this. Please, Jeannie?"

She was about to make some joke about frostbite when the look in Danny's eyes stopped her. Danny wanted this and making Danny happy had been a major part of her life for almost seven years.

The idea of being with her husband in the open was not new to her. They had made love often outside in the courtyard of their house; they had also made love a couple of times on the deck facing the Pacific. While on their honeymoon, they had made love on the beach of their private little island in the middle of the loch. They had made love outside their northern California getaway. Why did this feel so different? Why did she feel so exposed? CJ looked around. The two of them were the only disruption of the expanse of snow glistening in the moonlight that was almost as bright as wintry sunlight.

But, CJ told herself, this was Danny. This was the man who had spent six or seven hours every night for three weeks sitting outside in the dark to protect her, their children, and their friends. This was the man who gave his space next to her to another woman and slept on a mattress on the floor for those same three weeks in order to watch over his family and Li's family. This was the man who, when he did find time and place to make love with her during that frightening time, made sure that she knew the difference between what he wanted to do with her and what the monster that was terrorizing Santa Monica wanted to do to her. Danny would not be asking for this if he felt there was any danger to her, physically or emotionally; if he felt that there was any danger to their privacy.

CJ brought her legs together to make it easier to him to remove her panties. She moved her hand to his groin and felt the firm steel underneath his sweatpants. She was sure that were it not for that fabric and the knit of her mitten, she could feel him throbbing with desire for her.

Danny lay on his back and carefully helped CJ to kneel astride him, making sure that her legs were covered. He slipped his erection through the opening in his sweats and helped CJ to lower herself onto him.

The full skirt of her jumper covered them completely. They moved slowly but expertly against each other.

"Is my hand too cold?" Danny asked her. When CJ shook her head from side to side, he moved his fingers to her throbbing little center and began the motions that would eventually bring her to climax.

His eyes fixed on hers; her eyes became lost in the dark blue of his.

CJ stiffened and thrust her core hard against his fingers. He pressed those fingers hard against her and felt her shudder of completion. Then Danny used both hands to keep her hips where he needed them; his thrusts became slightly stronger, slightly faster until he also shuddered and released inside her.

She lay against Danny's chest for a few minutes and he stroked her hair. Then the cold began to seep through the heavy wool of the blanket and the microfiber that filled his parka, so he nudged her into a sitting position, adjusted his clothing, and stood.

The white scrap of cloth that was her underwear had slipped off the blanket and was dusted with snow, so CJ decided not to wear them. She shoved them into her pocket and then, accepting Danny's hand, was pulled to her feet.

They walked back to the house arm in arm. Once inside, they doffed coats, gloves, and boots, and made their way upstairs. Given the hour, they knew they shouldn't use Siobhan and Liam's hot tub to warm their cold bodies; a shower would have to do.

They stayed in the shower until the hot water began to give out, then dried each other and hurried into bed.

When they embraced under the covers, CJ was given ample evidence that Danny was not yet ready for sleep. As she smiled in assent, he reached for a pillow and, slipping it against her pelvis, turned her onto her stomach, covered her body and gently possessed her.

CJ lay there, his hardness inside her, his breath warm on her neck, his hands grasping hers over her head. For the first time, she wished that, without giving up the person into whom she had grown as a result of serving Josiah Bartlet for eight years, the two of them could have come together before they did. She imagined them with five or six kids, most of them with a blend of their features. She imagined his delight as she told him of each pregnancy; she imagined their joy at each birth.

CJ knew that she had been blest beyond the dreams of most people and she thanked God every day for what she had been given, but she wondered.

Maybe it was because of all the new Bartlet babies.

Zoey and Charlie's first child, Marilyn Abigail, was named for her grandmothers.

Bonnie had a much easier time with her second daughter, Erika Marie, than she had with Giselle.

Carol and David named Sean Daniel for her father and for his, but did ask CJ and Danny to be his godparents.

Ginger and Rick added a third girl to their family. Diana Michelle was the image of her mother.

And Ellie and Vic gave the Bartlets another granddaughter – Collette Suzanne.

And at home, Yan was about to give birth, Sally mentioned that she and Billy were "thinking about a sibling for Will", and Hank and Steve were waiting to see if the last artificial insemination of their surrogate "took". And, of course, everyone wondered if and when Nancy and Jesse would make an announcement.

Then Danny moved his right hand from hers, reached under the pillow, and her thoughts of thankfulness turned to something less maternal and more primal.

Wednesday, December 25; 10:45 PM

"Merry Christmas, Jeannie."

Danny came up behind CJ and circled her with his arms. There was a small jewelry box in his right hand.

"Danny?"

"Take it."

CJ took the box from his hands and opened it.

"Oh, Danny!"

It was a single emerald cut enhancer-style pendant of imperial topaz. It was set on a thin marine link chain, but the 18 karat gold clasp was large enough to fit over her half inch omega.

"I didn't want to give this to you in front of the others, but I didn't want to wait until we got home."

CJ understood what Danny meant, that he didn't want to upstage Liam and Liam's father, by giving his wife such an expensive present. CJ's big gift for Danny was still in Santa Monica, because it made no sense to ship a new club chair for his den to Michigan and back.

"Look, it matches."

She held the necklace against her cleavage. The stone matched the rich copper silk of the Grecian-style negligee that was in the package that she did open under the tree that morning.

It had been a truly wonderful Christmas, starting with midnight Mass in St. Anne's church. The glow of the candles through the church windows turned the snow from silver to gold. Wonder of wonders, Paddy was not the first one up Christmas morning.("I'm always up early on Christmas Day," Liam said. "I like to sit in the darkened room with the tree lights on and watch the dawning.") Paddy and Caitlin tore through their small packages and then played with their toys while the adults sipped coffee, ate cranberry coffee cake, and opened their own presents. A massive snowball fight took place around noon, followed by naps. The turkey was ready by 2:30, and dinner was served at 3:15. At dusk, everyone went sledding and came back inside for turkey sandwiches, hot mulled cider, and pie.

Danny draped the necklace around her neck and clasped the chain. The flames from the fireplace in their bedroom caught in the stone and flashed off the ripples of her nightgown. The faint red of Danny's hair was also enhanced by the firelight – the hair on his head, the hair of his beard, the hair on his chest, the downy hair of his arms.

CJ slipped her hands under the waistband of her husband's Notre Dame green pajama bottoms and stroked the hair not touched by the glow in the room.

And then emerald and topaz silk lay on the floor as two bodies lay on the bed.

Monday, December 30, 2013; 8:45 PM PST; Santa Monica, CA

Danny smiled as CJ set down the champagne flutes by the edge of the hot tub, slipped out of her shift, and into the warm, bubbling water beside him.

It had been a long day, getting up at 6:00 AM East Coast time and leaving a subzero Mackinac Island, then flying to Chicago and then into LAX at 3:00 PM, where the weather was 75 degrees and sunny. Steve met them at the airport with the news that Yan had gone into labor a week or so ahead of schedule and that the Wei's at the hospital right now; Mei-ling was staying with Hank, Pammy, and him.

Paddy regaled "Uncle Steve" with stories of Christmas in the snow; Danny made a surreptitious call to Hank when they were ten minutes from the house. When they reached the house and entered the courtyard, Paddy could see the glowing tree surrounded by packages – larger packages than the ones Santa had left on the island – through the glass doors leading into the family room. The boy ran across the courtyard, stopping only to hug Destiny, who had spent the holidays with Hank and Steve. ("Now Pammy is pleading for a dog three times a day," Steve laughed.)

The moon that lit the courtyard was now in its last quarter. Danny thought back to the beginning of the last two weeks, to the last time he gazed at a quarter moon in the sky above his home. Today, things had returned to normal, or to whatever passed for normal in the human condition. Everyone was sleeping in his or her own house. The only cars parked on the street were those belonging to the friends of Drew and Jill Robbins, who were hosting a party for their high school friends, all home from colleges and grad schools across the nation.

Danny pulled CJ around and onto his lap. He kissed her eyes, the tip of her nose, her jaw, and finally her mouth. With one arm around her shoulders, he traced the line of her hip with the other hand.

Danny urged her to her feet than stood beside her. After more kisses (her neck, the valley between her breasts), he took her hand and led her out of the hot tub.

Danny considered making love with his wife in the light of the waning Cold Moon, a name that sounded as incongruous in the warmth of the California night as it sounded fitting in the chill of an island in Lake Huron. But, remembering that it had been almost a month since their marriage bed had lived up to its name, he slipped one arm around her shoulders, another under her knees, and carried her into the house.

Full Moons:

January -- Wolf Moon

February -- Snow Moon

March -- Worm Moon

April -- Pink Moon

May -- Flower Moon

June -- Strawberry Moon

July -- Buck Moon

August -- Sturgeon Moon

September -- Harvest Moon

October -- Hunter's Moon

November -- Beaver Moon

December -- Cold Moon