He woke up, startled from a dream or something he couldn't remember. He looked over at the red numbers on his alarm clock. 2:00! Shit, it's 2am. He tried to go back to sleep, but just couldn't. He knew what this was about, but had tried to avoid it as long as possible.

He looked back over to the alarm clock. 2:15! Alright, that's it. He got out of bed, turned the little lamp on that was on his nightstand, and he got dressed quick. He walked out of his room, grabbed his car keys from the little hook by the front door, and left Miles apartment in a hurry.

When he pulled up in front of Claire's house, all the lights were off. Of course, he thought, it's 2.30 in the morning. He parked his car, then walked quietly up to the front door. He looked around, trying to remember where Claire hid her spare key. He knew where it was just for that off chance he'd have to pick up Aaron from preschool, but he'd actually never used it before. Guess there's a time for everything. He found it and unlocked the door, then placed the key back to its hiding spot. He walked in the dark and quiet house. And he was just about to head upstairs, when her voice startled him more then he'd like to admit.

"James?"

He turned around.

"What are you doing here? I thought we agreed about tonight?" She got up from the couch, walking towards him now.

"I know, baby. I just couldn't sleep, I had to talk to you."

She finally flicked a light on, so they could actually see each other better.

"Is everything okay?" She got a concerned look on her face.

"Yes, it's not that. I just …" He rubbed his face with his hand, then pushed his long strands of hair back, and she could see right through him, he was trying to buy time.

"Are you having second thoughts about us?" She wanted to cry, scream actually, but she stayed calm.

His eyes expressed shock, "No, no, freckles." He shook his head almost frantically as he walked towards her. "I swear, that is not it at all." He pulled her in a tight hug. "I don't have second thoughts, you and me are meant to be. I love you. You know that."

"Then what is it? Why are you over here, sneaking in the house at 2 in the morning?" She pulled away enough to look up and meet his eyes.

He pulled her over to the couch, they sat down together, facing each other. "I just have to ask you something. It's been killing me not knowing, and I know you love me now and we are good, awesome actually, but I have to know."

"Know what?"

"I have to know if you loved me when we were on the island, or if you fell in love with me now, after we made it off the island?" His eyes locked on hers, almost desperate, pleading with her to say what he wants her to say.

She stared at him, she couldn't believe he actually had to ask her that. But then a startling realization came over her, looking at things from his point of view, how he might have come to that conclusion. She sighed, then took both his hands in hers and said, "I loved you on the island."

She could see relieve washing over his tight face, his eyes no longer fixated on hers, he leaned in to kiss her.

"I'm not finished." She continued after a quick kiss. "I started to fall in love with you slowly. You didn't really make it easy on me. I already had feelings for you before you left on that raft with Michael. And then after the cages, on our way back when you accused me of just having slept with you out of guilt. I thought about denying it, telling you that I really loved you, but then my pride took over. You acted so stubborn, so mean, pretending we meant nothing. I've gotten hurt one too many times, done that whole pushing someone away myself to know what that was all about.

Regardless, we wouldn't have worked out back then, because both of us too stubborn to admit what we really felt. And I have to be honest, when I left the island, after meeting Cassidy, I was convinced you didn't love me, never had. Because you were so desperate to stay on that island. So desperate to push me away and get away from me any chance you got. You got close to me just long enough to make me fall for you and then you left. Just like you'd done with Cassidy.

I tried to move on eventually, with Jack. But that didn't work out either, because a promise I made to you meant more then gaining his trust in me. He couldn't handle me leaving him in the dark about what I was doing for you, when I went to spend time with Clementine. And it would have been so easy to just tell him. You were gone, but I didn't love him enough to do that.

But then when I did return, you were happy with Juliet. And I wasn't going to be like my stepfather. I wasn't going to be that someone that drove the person that loved you away. You were happy with her. She loved you so much. I can't say that Juliet was my favorite person, … she wasn't. Never would have been, but none the less, she was with you." She stopped at that, didn't know what else to say.

Tears stinging at her eyes, rolling down her cheeks. His heart was hurting in his chest for her, thinking about what he'd done to her, to them. He knew he'd tried his best to push her away, over and over again. But still, she ended up coming back for more … like a beaten down puppy, coming back for the mercy kill! But then again, so did he. Longing after her, and every time they got closer, there was Jack playing the hero! So instead of waiting and ending up being a sorry loser, he decided to act as if it didn't matter to him, she was just someone he'd have sex with.

'You don't have to use me freckles, all you have to do is ask' … he remembered saying that to her just like it was yesterday. Just to cover up his own hurt feelings, hurting her in return. To this day he didn't know why she came to his tent, but he'd believed it was because of Juliet and Jack, and nothing else.

He hugged her tight, "I'm sorry for everything. I hope you know that I loved you all along." He was never one to just say everything out loud, say what he really meant, but Claire had convinced him that he was getting to old to play high school games.

They both weren't getting any younger, and if he wanted her for good, he had to tell her so. Leaving no room for other interpretation on her part. No more guessing games, that's why he had to come here tonight. Cause even though he'd been open with his feelings after she'd gotten back from Cassidy, he'd still unanswered questions. But now, it was all out. Everything had been said, no matter how embarrassing or humiliating it might have been for either one to admit or hear it. Today, in a couple of hours, they'd get married, and once and for all leave their past behind.

They cuddled and eventually fell asleep on the couch in each others arms. This might actually work, he thought. They might actually have a shot to make it this time.

It was 3.30 pm when they pulled up to the house he shared with Kate. Hurley, Miles and him got out of the car.

He walked up to his front door, from the outside you couldn't tell at all what was about to happen in there. Guess the money they'd invested in keeping this wedding quiet was worth every penny.

He was just about to walk in the front door, when the door swung open and a large man, wearing a suit stood in front of him. This guy was at least half a foot taller than Sawyer, a hell of a lot broader, and he didn't look too friendly either when he asked, "Who are you?"

Sawyer sounded surprised, "Who am I? I'm the groom, I live here. Who are you?" He had to look up to meet the guys eyes.

"I'm with security. Name?" The guy grabbed a clipboard out of nowhere.

By now Miles and Hurley had made their way to the door as well, standing to the right and left of Sawyer.

"James Ford." Sawyer huffed his own name. He's getting annoyed. He was a little bit nervous, in 1 hour he was going to get married.

"Sorry sir, but you're not on the list."

He wanted to smack this guy, "What do you mean I'm not on the list? I'm the groom. Who made the list?" He was getting furious.

Miles padded him on the back, in a comforting way. "He might be listed as Sawyer, James Sawyer, or Jim Sawyer."

"Yes, there you are. Mr. Sawyer, welcome to your wedding. And you are?" The man looked over at Miles and then Hurley.

"Hugo or Hurley Reyes."

"Miles Straume."

The man just nodded, checked their names off the list and stepped aside to let them all in.

Sawyer couldn't believe this was their home, him and Kate had moved in with Miles a couple days ago, so the wedding planner could do their magic. And he must admit, this was magic, he hadn't expected it to look this good. White fabric covering the walls, everything was white. And red roses everywhere!

Her dad was already there, and he walked over to them, shook Miles and Hurley's hand, pulled Sawyer in an awkward hug. Mainly awkward cause Sawyer hadn't foreseen her dad getting emotional already. They all tried to pretend that didn't just happen, when the security guy yelled for Sawyer.

"Mr. Sawyer? There's someone here that's not on my list."

Sawyer started walking over towards the door, when he already saw from afar that it was Richard and Ben standing in the doorway. They greeted each other, Miles and Hurley had walked over too. Richard attending their wedding would not be a big deal, he would have been invited all along, had they known how to get in touch with him. But Ben on the other hand was a different story.

"Look, I could care less if you're here or not, but Kate, now that's a different story. And I ain't 'bout to land in the doghouse, before I even got a ring on my finger, if you know what I mean?"

"Of course, James. I understand." Ben looked disappointed.

Hurley chimed in, "Hey, why don't I go upstairs and ask if Kate's alright with it or not? I'm just the best man, so I'm allowed to see her before the wedding, right Dudes?" He looked around for confirmation.

"Yeah, I think you're okay to see her?" Miles said.

They stood by the door rather awkwardly, waiting for Hurley to return, when Miles said, "So Ben, how's the island?"

-
Cassidy came downstairs with Hurley, and they confirmed that Ben was allowed to stay. Cassidy glanced Sawyer up and down, and then shook her head.

"What?" He blurted out, noting her disappointed look.

"You wear a button down shirt any day of the week, but on your wedding day you decide to put on a white t-shirt under your Jacket. Really Sawyer? And you're wearing jeans."

He rolled his eyes at his ex, "Look, sweet cheeks, why don't you take this up with my fiancé up there, cause she picked my outfit for today." He said with an angry tone to his voice no one else had foreseen.

"Really?" Hurley chimed in, totally surprised, "She picks your clothes out for you? Dude, she totally tamed you!"

Sawyer looked over at him, giving him a mean look, sounding offended, "She what?"

Before Hurley could say it again, "She did tame you. No point in denying anymore, especially after last night?" Miles added his 2 cents.

Cassidy just walked away, her and Sawyer got along, as long as the subject of their conversations was Clementine.

"What happened last night? Did I miss something?" Hurley looked around.

"Nothing happened last night?" Sawyer threw back, giving Miles a mean look now for even mentioning it.

When the priest walked up to them, and shook Sawyers hand, he could feel his nerves unravel even more. After the priest left he looked over to Hurley, "I might need a drink, man."

"No problem, I get you something."

Miles looked over at Sawyer, "In all this time I've known you, Jim. I don't think I've ever seen you like this."

Sawyer looked at him, "Like what?"

"You're really nervous, aren't you? This is like a big step for you."

"Of course it's a big step, ain't like I'm getting married every other day. This is it, Enos, my one chance with Kate." He looked around to see if anyone could be listening in, then said, "You don't know half the shit I put her through in as little as 3 month on that damn island. So for her to even consider marrying me now, well… I'm one lucky bastard. So yeah, I'm nervous, cause … I guess I'm scared that she might still come to her senses, and pulls a Julia Roberts on me."

Miles just nodded, smiling, then added, "You've clearly watched too many chick flicks with Claire and Kate."

His hands were sweaty when Hurly showed up with a tall glass of whiskey. He chucked it down in one big gulp. Sighed, as if he was coming up for air, then handed Hurley the empty glass back.

-
Kate stood in front of the mirror, smoothing out her elegant, yet very simple white dress. There were no beats, no clasps, no anything. Just the smooth white fabric clinging to her every curve of her upper body, but from the waist down, it fell more like a a-line skirt. Her white but simple high heels not even showing. She wore very little make up, just a little bit of powder, mascara and a lipstick that was pretty much the same color of her lips anyways. Her hair falling over her shoulders, loosely, yet she had a veil sitting in her hair, pinned down so it wouldn't just fall out. Sawyer always said she was the prettiest woman in the world like that. Well, always, meaning since they'd gotten back together about six weeks ago.

She turned around to everyone, "So, what do you think?"

"You look just beautiful." Carole said, looking at her.

"Yes, she does," her father chimed in, admiring his daughter.

"Breathtaking." Claire admired her.

Her dad looked at his watch and said, "I think it's almost time to go, Katie. I'll wait by the stairs." He walked over and gave his daughter a kiss on the cheek, before he left the room.

Carole walked over, and showed a necklace to her, simple, elegant, with a small heart pendant, "This is your old and borrowed item." Kate held up her hair carefully, not to disturb the veil on her head, so that Carole could close the necklace around her neck.

"Thank you so much, Carole." They hugged sincerely.

"And getting this right here, this is what's gonna be Sawyers favorite part of the wedding." Claire held up a blue garter. "And it's also something new and blue at the same time." Everyone in the room smiled.

Kate hiked up her dress, lifting one foot, so that Claire could put the garter on her, she was wearing white stockings, just for Sawyers amusement actually. She'd forgotten about the part where he would be taken the garter off in front of everyone. She wondered for a moment if he even knew that he was supposed to do that. They'd never talked about it. Cassidy and Claire both now lowered her veil over her face, and admired her one last time. Carole handed her the flowers, then took Clementine and Aaron downstairs, cause this wedding was going to start any moment now.

Everyone was ready. She walked out of her room, and after a few moments, the music started playing. She grabbed her dad's arm, holding on to it. He looked at his daughter proudly. She didn't think she'd ever see a proud look in his eyes for her again, but there it was. Even after everything she'd done, he was here, in the most important moment in her life. From where they were at, James couldn't see her yet. Nobody could. She would walk into the big room around the corner, and then there would be no turning back anymore. This was it, they are going to be married. She smiled, and they slowly started walking.

End Note:

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