CHAPTER TWO

TURMOIL WITH SWANS

Bella had left a note that she and Edward went for a walk. I felt brand new tears fall from my eyes. He was telling her that the Cullens are leaving.

The sun went down, and Bella wasn't home yet.

Dad came home, and Bella wasn't home yet.

Finally around ten, I spoke up. "Dad, have you gotten a call from Bella? She went for a walk with Edward but that was hours ago."

Two hours later, I wish I hadn't said anything at all. Dad had worked himself into a fright and gathered half the town as a rescue party.

It was almost two in the morning and we still hadn't found her. They wouldn't let me go search the woods.

Dad poured over a map on the hood on my jeep with Billy and Harry Clearwater. "I'll call the Cullens again. Her note said that she and Edward went for a walk."

"They left town, Charlie," Billy said.

"Hospital said Doc got a big job somewhere else," Harry contributed.

I sat on the concrete steps in front of our house. I had my knees to my chest and my arms wrapped tightly around him. I cried silently into my jeans. I was so worried.

Jacob walked up to me, "Callie. It'll be okay."

I lifted my face from my knees and glared at him, "How! How is this going to be okay? The Cullens are gone! I know you don't like them but I owe them everything. I owe them my life. And Bella will be devastated. How am I supposed to help her when I can't even help myself? Everything is going to fall apart."

Jacob sat himself beside my and wrapped both his arms around me, "Everything may be falling apart right now. But it's all fallen apart before. And it got better. It'll get better this time too."

I looked up at him tearfully, "How can you promise that?"

"I just can," Jacob whispered.

Just then we heard, "Charlie! Callie!"

I whipped on my feet in super speed and ran to where Billy – the one who spoke – was. We all saw a super buff Quileute man – shirtless and shoe-less – carrying Bella in from the woods.

"It's Sam Uley. He found her," Billy said.

I bolted to them, "Daddy!" Dad was right behind me. He wrapped his arms around Bella, "Thank you, Sam. I've got her." He carried Bella into the house. I noticed Billy and Harry nod at Sam. But Sam backed away.

Jacob put his arm around me, "Let's get you inside." He startled slowly walking but suddenly stopped. He turned slightly to look behind us. Sam Uley was staring right at him, expectantly.

Jacob turned away and continued to walk me into the house.

When we got inside I burst into tears. Bella had looked so lifeless. I heard her mutter, "He's .. gone." She wouldn't come out of this. Of that, I was terrified.

Jacob wrapped his arms around me again. He shhh'd me, "It'll be okay. I promise."

He sat me on the couch and let me rock back and forth in his arms, letting it all out.

When I was finally out of tears, I just stayed there. In Jacob's arms. It almost reminded me of that dance we shared. Jacob had his head resting on mine. He breathed out, "Callie."

Just then, Dad came in, looking distressed, "Callie... oh-"

I nearly flew off Jacob's lap, "How is she?"

"Not good," Dad sighed, "Can you...?"

I nodded and stood, "Of course." I looked down at Jake on the couch, "I'll see you later."

Jacob stood and gave me one last hug. He looked at dad, "Charlie."

Dad nodded at him, "Thanks for tonight Jacob."

Jacob nodded and left to find his dad.

I walked slowly upstairs and into Bella's room. She was laying the wrong way on the bed, her feet by the headboard. She was staring blankly up at the ceiling.

When I saw her that way, it reminded of me when I was in that dark place. The place when I tried to kill myself. I couldn't stand seeing my sister that way. She was supposed to be strong.

I nearly cried again. "Oh, Bella." I got onto the bed and laid beside her. I grabbed her arms and placed myself into her side, like when I'd sit in her lap.

She didn't even notice I was there.

OCTOBER

NOVEMBER

DECEMBER

JANUARY

Bella had regressed. She was a complete zombie. She stared at nothing most of the time. She was just going through the motions. She didn't even notice that me and Dad were there. She didn't notice that this was hurting me too.

I had regressed. Seeing my sister that way... I wasn't strong enough to hold both of us up. Bella was the strong one. She took care of me. It may be selfish but I couldn't take care of her. I didn't have what it takes.

At lunch, Bella sat alone at the table the Cullens sat at before they integrated with us. Tyler didn't like how Bella's behavior was affecting me, so he kept me away from her at school. I would be furious with him if I had the energy to feel anything at all.

Bella hasn't spoken one word to me since the event. And yes, I'm calling it the event. She'd rather talk to Alice's void email instead of confide in her sister who can actually relate.

Part of me resented her. What gave her the right to claim the depressive Swan just because her boyfriend left? I didn't want the title mind you, but I was actually diagnosed. She put herself in zombie-mode on purpose.

Why couldn't she just talk to me? I'm her sister. I know more than anyone what she is going through right now. The Cullens left me too. They were my family too. Just because she was dating one, she got to ignore everyone and play dead? no.

I was sitting on the couch. The pills sat on the coffee table. I couldn't decide whether to take them or not. Would they even help me? Would anything help me?

I heard Bella come into the house. I heard her walk upstairs. She was probably emailing Alice on her computer, only to have a message come in that said the delivery failed. Then she'd stare out her window on her rocking chair.

I heard Dad come in about 45 minutes later. He put his jacket on the hook and put his gun in the closet.

He came in to find me crying in the living room. "Callie?"

I looked up at him through my tears, "I can't make decisions anymore. I can't sleep. I can't feel anything but pain. I see Bella and I-" I broke off, sniffing and choking back sobs, "Daddy... Please help me... I can't live like this anymore."

Dad practically ran to me and hugged me to his chest tightly. "It'll be okay, Callie. We'll figure something out. I-I'll get Bella some help. I'll get you some help. We'll take you to see a.. therapist or something-"

"No, daddy, no more doctors. Seeing professionals makes me feel like a mental patient and that makes me feel worse."

I felt Dad nod, "You can go to La Push on weekends. I know Embry and the guys make it better. Your birthday is coming up."

Oh yeah. I was turning seventeen on January eleventh.

Dad told me he was sending Bella to Jacksonville. Good. He asked if I wanted to go. I said no. Forks was my home now.

I heard Bella's truck pull up to the house and went out to stand by the door. Bella went to close her door as Dad said, "That's it."

Bella looked confused, "What?"

"You're going to live in Jacksonville with your mother." Dad stated.

"What? Why?" Like she didn't know.

"I just – don't know what to do anymore. Your behavior affects us all Bella. Especially your sister."

"I'm not leaving Forks." Bella argued.

"Bells, the bastard's not coming back," Dad sighed.

Bella nodded. She looked down.

"It's not normal, this behavior. And frankly, it's scaring the hell outta us. Go to Jacksonville, baby. Make some new friends." Dad said gently.

"I like my old friends," Bella argued.

"You never see them anymore. Hell, you don't even talk to your own sister. Do you know how much that hurts her?" The last part came out somewhat harshly. But Bella didn't look phased one bit. She just didn't want to move to Jacksonville and lose whatever connection to Edward she made up in her mind in Forks.

"I do, too," Bella stammered, "In fact, I'm... um... Jessica and I are going to Port Angeles tomorrow. Shopping."

Dad gave her a disbelieving look, "You hate shopping."

"That's how good a friend I am," Bella said. Yeah, I thought, good friend. Not good sister.

But dad went with it, "Alright. Shopping."

The next day, Bella went to the movies with Jessica. When she came downstairs, I was eating a bowl of fruit with my pills sitting on the counter. She came in to grab a water.

"Hi," I said.

She didn't even pause. She walked out the front door.

A moment later I heard her car starting and driving out of the driveway.

I almost cried right then and there.

The only things that made everything bearable was Embry and Jasper. I decided to take dad up on the 'going to La Push every weekend' thing and called Embry up. He sounded so excited that I was coming down. I know how much he had been worried about me.

Almost every other day, I got a reply email from Jasper. I must have written a short story every time and he only wrote about half a page of how much he missed Forks – me – and wanted me to try and be happy. At the end he always wrote Until we see each other again, Jasper.

So when I felt down, I wrote to him.

… Bella never even looks at me anymore. But she just left to hang out with Jessica. And she writes Alice everyday – even thought Alice never replies. When she's not confiding in Alice instead of her sister, she's doing homework or sitting in that damn rocking chair and staring out at nothing.

I try talking to her. She doesn't notice and doesn't answer. The only time I hear her voice is when she's talking to dad, talking to herself, or when she screams at night from the nightmares.

I don't know what to do about her anymore, Jaz. I've lost my will to try.

I hope you can come back soon.

Your sister, Callie.

After writing, I went to sleep. Or I tried. I could never sleep anymore. I stayed up at night reading or letting my black thoughts consume me. That was the worst thing to do.

The only good thing about no sleep. No nightmares. I knew I'd have them by the shitload if I could actually sleep.

So it was good that I didn't.

Remember that I really don't like Bella. There will be Bella-bashing. That's the last warning. But let me know what you think so far.

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RegalGirl94