CHAPTER FIVE

SWAN VS. SWAN

Before I even performed my nightly ritual of attempting to sleep, Bella came downstairs.

She stood in my doorway, "Was that Jacob who just dropped you off?"

I narrowed my eyes at her , my patience thinning dangerously, "What, you're talking to me now?"

"What were you two doing out so late?" Bella ignored my question.

"For your information, Isabella," I snapped, "He was just bringing me home from my party. You know, for my birthday. No, you wouldn't know. You don't care."

She just gave me a black stare. Not even calling her Isabella – which she hated – could snap her out of it. "Why didn't he come in to say hi to me?"

Okay, screw the whole 'my patience is thinning' thing, it's full-on snapped now. "Oh my god, do you even hear yourself half the time? You are so selfish. All you care about is yourself. Never mind your dad who pulls his hair out worrying about you. Never mind all your friends you stopped talking to. Never mind our mother that desperately wants her daughter back. And never mind your clinical sister who considers suicide everyday because you won't even look at her!"

That snapped her, "Don't try to play victim. You have no idea what I'm going through."

Finally.

"Boo hoo, Bella, you're boyfriend left you because he's stupid and loves you too much. That is no excuse to break your family's heart and lead Jacob on like this. You used to try and act like you were such an adult and were the one to take care of me and mom then me and dad. Well, bullshit. You took care of yourself. Sure you moved here for me, but you stayed for you. And you stopped coming here years ago for you. You didn't care about me. You never cared about me. And I should have realized that then."

"That's not true. You just can't handle that everyone is focusing on me and my problems for once."

I laughed sarcastically, "Oh yeah, Bella, I'm super jealous that everyone thinks you're a huge whiner baby and naive girl who shuts down when she gets dumped for the first time. That's just it. You hit the nail right on the head."

"Shut up, Callie. No one cares."

That did shut me up.

No one cared.

My shoulders sagged, "Do you know what I've been battling alone for over two years? Huh? Have you seen all the scares on my wrists? Did you noticed that my entire pill box was empty right after we got it refilled the day before? No one noticed. You nor mom cared. You just asked me about pills everyday and Mom dumped me on every therapist in the state. Then she sent me to that god forsaken psych ward in Texas. And it was Phil who noticed that it bothered me. It was him who found my razor. It was him who found me in the bathroom after I overdosed and took me to the ER. I'm sure mom would have visited if you hadn't broken your wrist the same weekend."

Bella had gone unresponsive again. But I knew she was listening. "How dare you try to even attempt to compare what you're going to to what I'm going through. You take and take from all of us and then freeze us out until you can use us again. You used me to justify your staying here. You used Edward to feel loved. Even though you were loved. And now you're using Jacob for some sick twisted plot to get Edward back. Don't think I don't here you talking to yourself. These are thin walls."

"You don't know what you're talking about," Bella scowled.

"The hell I don't!"

"What's going on with you and Jacob?" Bella ignored me, as usual.

"We're just friends. Because I don't lead him on."

"I'm not leading him on," Bella argued. Well, more like mumbled.

God, she was infuriating me. "Bullshit, Bella, you know how he feels about you and you are manipulating him to do everything you want him to do because it's easy."

"I saw that kiss out there," Bella glared at me.

"Please. That was a kiss on the cheek between friends," Lie. "Besides, I have a boyfriend."

I knew that was a low blow, by the look on her face when I said it. And I regretted it immediately. But I didn't take it back. She deserved a degree of the hurt she dolled onto me by the ton.

"Bella, you were my sister and I loved you. But you are no sister to me now. Get out."

There, I said it.

Something I had been wanting to say for a while but never did in hope that she'd come out of her depression and turn things around.

But it didn't look like that was going to happen.

I had to cut myself loose of her constant rejection.

She turned and I heard her mutter, "Spoiled brat." as she left.

As soon as the door closed, I fell to my knees and cried. I cried for everything.

For Jasper.

For Dad.

For Angela.

For Jacob.

For Bella.

For me.

And it was only going to get worse.

Bad news... I'm out of town visiting family and I forgot to bring my power chord... so it might be a while until the next update.

But I would love to see all your reviews when I get back!

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RegalGirl94