Chapter Twenty-Four – Mommie Dearest

Sydney's POV

Numbness took over my body since I heard the news and still hadn't left. My father picked Theresa and me up at the airport and we spent the ride in silence. I sat in the front seat with him, sunglasses covering my glossy eyes. I had my knees pulled up to my chest and I stared out the window.

"What kind did you say it is, again?" I asked with no emotion in my voice.

"It's cholangiocarcinoma, or bile duct cancer." He responded, the same lackluster tone in his voice.

"How bad is it?"

"Well, the type of cancer is almost completely undetectable, so, well, it's terminal." His voice cracked, I could tell that he had been crying more then I had.

The only word I could mutter was, "Oh."

It seemed to take an eternity to reach the hospital. I exited the car and followed my father; Theresa's hand grabbed mine and squeezed it. "It's going to be okay," she whispered.

I swallowed and entered the hospital. I was never a fan of them, they made my spine crawl. But I marched forward, my head held high. Everyone watched as we made our way down the halls. It wasn't a secret, Theresa and my success, especially in town. Nothing here was ever a secret. Everyone in the town knew about my mother, and they all gave me pitiful looks, some bursting into tears as they saw my face.

We eventually made it to her door. Theresa had decided to go get us some food, though I refused to eat. I knew she just wanted to give us some space, since she wasn't technically a member of the family. My father turned to me, "Sydney, I know this is going to be hard, but she really wants to talk to you. Be strong, for her. I'm going to go get Tanner, we'll wait for you." I nodded and placed my hand on the handle. Taking a deep breath, I turned the knob and entered the room.

My sneakers made no noise as I snuck into the room. I could see my mother laying there, her pale skin made me cringe. I sucked in my emotions and walked over to her. Placing my hand on her shoulder, she jumped.

She rolled over and looked at me, a huge smile reaching across her face, "My babygirl, you made it."

Her voice sounded weak and it made it even more difficult to maintain my composure, "Oh course I did, momma."

There was silence as she reached up and tucked a piece of fallen hair behind my ear. She was weak, her hands shook and I knew she was terribly scared. "Mom, I-", I began but her hand striking my face caused me to stop.

"Shush," she demanded. "I don't want you to say anything self deprecating right now. No, this is not your fault. It wouldn't have been any different if you were here."

"How did you know I was going to say that?" I asked, pulling a chair out from the corner of the room so that I could sit next to her.

She grabbed my hand, "Because I know you, sweetie, better then anyone else. Speaking of, you and I need to have a talk about this boy. Now he seems like a nice gentleman, but I didn't give him permission to date you."

"Mom, I'm eighteen and traveling across the world. I didn't think he needed permission."

"Every boy needs permission. Your father needs to psycho-analyze him, you know, make sure he's not mentally ill or a serial killer or anything."

I snorted, "Daddy never could just meet someone, always reading their mind."

"I think your boyfriend just about gave him a heart attack last night."

"What do you mean? He watched the show?"

"He watches every show, sweetie, we all do."

"What do you mean?"

"Every night half the town gathers in the movie theatre. You have a special room where we watch the performances. Someone films the live streams and we sit and watch you. You always look so beautiful on stage, doing what you love. You always have. That's something I really want to talk about. We both know the realities of what's happening to me right now. We know what's going to happen."

"Mom, don't talk like that."

"Shut up and listen to me. We know. But I know something that you don't. I know that you're going to blame yourself. You're not going to want to get back up on that stage, because in your mind you're going to somehow correlate the two. But I am telling you right now, I want you to get back up on that stage every night and give it everything you have. You are going to do it for me. You are going to do it for your father and your brother. You are going to do it for every family that has ever gone through this hell."

"Okay, momma, I'll do it for you. But you have to do something for me."

"What?"

"You can't go. You can't leave me."

"Syd, neither of us have a choice in this matter, you know that."

I looked at her, my tears finally escaping my eyes. The emotions I had been suppressing for the past ten hours were beginning to surface. My lack of sleep was creeping up on me and causing rational thought to deplete itself.

I stood up quickly, my chair flying back towards the wall it came from. "No!" I shouted, my hands bawling themselves into fists. "No!" I repeated, turning on my heels. I stormed out of the room, my bag slamming against my knees as I walked.

I ran out of the hospital. I could see Theresa out of the corner of my eye as I walked through the lobby, a try of food in her hands and a look of shock on her face. I was mad, this wasn't fair. Why did it have to be our family that this happened to? Why now?

I got into my car and took off with no regard to the speed limit. I drove down the familiar country road, the grass was beginning to freeze and everything was dying. Everything.

I drove and drove, my speed increasing with each tear that streamed down my face. I just wanted to be home, to lay in my bed and cry until it didn't hurt anymore. Then I heard sirens. I turned my head to see a cop, signaling his lights to pull me over.

I slowed down and pulled to the curb, grabbing my bag with my license and pulling my registration out of the glove box. I wiped a final tear that fell from my eye as I rolled down the window for the officer to speak to me.

"Excuse me miss, do you know how fast you were going?" He said, leaning his hand against the frame of my door.

"No, I don't." I said, my voice sounding raspy.

"I'm going to have to see your license and registration." He demanded and I handed it to him. "Sydney Stewart, how do I know you?"

"I'm not sure, but can you just give me a ticket so I can go home?" More tears started to fight their way out of my eyes.

The cop nodded and headed back towards his car. It took about ten minutes before he finally walked back to my car. I rolled the window back down and held my hand out for my ticket, but he didn't give it to me.

"I remember how I know you now. I'm sorry for everything that's happening to your family. Also, I hope you have much success in your music. You can go."

I thanked him and took off, this time abiding by the speed limit. When I finally reached my home, I pulled into my space in the driveway and searched through my purse through my keys. I pulled them out and started up the back stairs towards my door. I looked up to see Louis standing there, his hair disheveled and a sad look upon his face.

"Louis, what are you doing here?" I asked, my lip beginning to quiver.

"I couldn't let you go through this alone." He replied, running a hand through his hair.

I ran up to him and jumped onto him in a hug. He caught me and held me, we stood their in silence, and only my sobs could be heard. I pulled back and looked at him. I bit my lip before I spoke, "Thank you, so much. Do you want to go inside? I'm freezing."

He laughed a bit and nodded. He put me down and I stuck the key in the door. I opened it and let the heating hit the tip of my reddened nose. Louis' hands where placed on my hips as we entered the home, giving me stability. As I entered the home I could hear the chorus of dogs barking as they saw us.

"My babies!" I cried out, unlocking all four of them from their kennels and sitting on the floor of my kitchen. I let them jump all over me and kiss me whenever they pleased. It was such a comfort to see them; it let me know that I was finally home. I let them all go outside and made sure that the gate was locked so that they couldn't roam all across the farm.

I went about my business, putting my purse and coat up, taking off my shoes, turning on the fire place, and turning on the stereo. I had forgotten Louis was there until I saw him standing in the kitchen awkwardly.

I walked over to him, taking his coat off his body and informing him to leave his shoes at the door. After he slipped them off I laughed. "What?" he asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"I had just forgotten that neither of us wear socks with our shoes," I replied. "Wait here!"

I ran up the staircase and into my bedroom. I bounded back down the stairs, now with two pairs of fuzzy socks in my hands. "Pink or orange?" I asked, smirking.

He grabbed the pink ones and I slipped the other pair onto my feet. I took him by the hand and drug him into the living room. We sat down on the couch and I cuddled into his chest, closing my aching eyes.

"Lou, can I ask you something?" I said, craning my neck to see his face.

"Yes, anything." He replied, half a smile on his face.

"Why did you announce that to the entire world?"

"I'm not sure, honestly. I just couldn't hold it in any longer."

I nodded and closed my eyes back on his chest. He lightly pet my hair as we laid there in silence. I smiled to myself, "Oh, by the way, I love you too."