THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS (Organization Style)
Or HOW XION SAVED CHRISTMAS
'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mous-
Axel gets up out of his bed.
"SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!" he screams.
HEY! You're not supposed to be awake!
"Says who?" Axel asks, in his red pajamas.
The narrator! NOW BACK TO BED!!
Ahem!
'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house;
"This is a CASTLE." Axel comments.
SHUT THE HELL UP AND -
"Whoa, whoa whoa! Swearing in the Christmas special? Charlie Brown's gonna be sooo disappointed!" Axel grins.
............. Fine. Stay up.
'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
"What about the kids who live in apartments?" Axel points out.
Uhh.....
"So how does Santa get to THOSE kids?"
uhh... He goes through the chimney.
"And if they don't HAVE a chimney?" Axel waits patiently for an answer.
Then they'll have to buzz his ass in!
NOW! WILL YOU PLEASE LET ME FINISH THE STORY?!
"... Sure." Axel sits down on the island of the kitchen.
'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;
"First off, I thought we were waiting for Santa! Second, if we had mice, then Larxy Junior woulda already sadistically killed and ate them all. THIRD! WE DON'T HAVE A CHIMNEY!!!" Axel points out.
.................Saint Nicholas IS Santa.
"Oh."
I said not EVEN a mouse, that doesn't mean you HAVE mice!
"... True."
Wait. No chimney? Then what's that? *points to chimney and fireplace*
"... Well! I'll be damned!"
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;
"What's a stocking?"
..... I EXPECT THAT FROM XION, NOT YOU!!!
A GIANT SOCK WHERE YOU PUT CANDY AND TOYS!!!! *taking deep breaths to try to calm down*
"... Is it used?"
What?
"Is that sock thing used?" Axel asks again.
No.
"Good, cause Bigfoot ain't gettin' MY candy!" Axel says smugly.
.....
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads;
"Sugar what?"
Sugar plums. It's a kind of candy.
"BULL SHIT! I'm gonna go see!" Axel marches off.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!
Axel sneaks into Xion's room.
"Aww... Hey, that's sea salt ice cream!" Axel points to a dream cloud with ice creams floating in the air inside.
... Kay then.
'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a HEARTLESS;
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of SEA SALT ICE CREAM danced in their heads;
And mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled down for a long winter's nap,
"... You in your what?" Axel asks.
What? Cap?
"Who the hell wears a baseball cap to bed?"
.... This is a VERY old poem, so shut up!
"Soo.... Who's Mamma?" Axel asks with a grin.
... Well, you're Papa I guess since you stayed up.
"I ain't-"
IN THE STORY.
Um... Is anyone in your bed?
"........Two things. Is that any of your business and NO!" Axel glares.
...... Sooo... I wonder who Mamma is!
"Let's find out!" Axel and the narrator start walking through the Castle, peeking through the doors.
"Not Saix."
Not Xemnas. Thank god for that one...
".. GAH!" Marluxia snores quietly.
HAHAHAHAHAHA!! HE'S IN A NIGHT GOWN!! WE FOUND MAMMA!!! *falls to the floor laughing*
"That is an over sized T SHIRT!"
Prove it. *laughing*
"... I gave it to him for .. HEY! He opened his present early!" Axel realizes.
Bad Marly.... let's leave a note for him to get coal. *scribbles and drops on his bed*
"... Axel?"
A sleepy sweet voice said,
a young girl had come out of bed.
"Ryhme?" the pyro questioned,
the narrator thought it best not to talk about the Heartless mentioned.
"WHAT HEARTLESS?!"
"Umm... What's going on?" Xion asked,
meanwhile, the narrator decided to get back to her special, her little task.
'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a Heartless;
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sea salt ice cream danced in their heads;
And mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled down for a long winter's nap,
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, *loud noise comes from outside the window*
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
"What the hell was that noise?!" Axel looks out the window.
"OH!! It's Twas a Night Before Christmas!!" Xion says and smiles happily and settle down to hear the poem.
"Xion! There's a BURGLAR!!" Axel whispers and slips into his room, carrying a baseball bat;
an expression full of doom.
"Santa!!" whispered the child,
her heart racing and thoughts going wild.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer,
With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.
"..... There's fuckin' reindeer on the lawn. This dude's sick in the head." Axel comments.
"It's SANTA!" Xion protests.
.... And the narrator will continue the story....
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
"Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! on Cupid! on, Donder and Blitzen!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too.
"SON OF A! HE'S IN THE CASTLE!" Axel swears madly,
"Santa!! SANTA!! AND REINDEER!" Xion whispers softly, her face awaiting gladly.
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I drew in my hand, and was turning around,
Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound. *thud as Santa falls through and lands*
He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;
A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.
"...SHHH! I'm gonna get 'em!" Axel hisses,
"WAIT!" Axel strikes and with his great aim, he never misses.
"GOT THE PERVERT SUCKER!" Axel cheers. On Xion's face, a look that would curdle ... beers.
"YOU HIT SANTA ON THE HEAD!!!" She shrieks, and off to the infirmary to prepare a bed.
".. HE IS NOT SANTA!!" Axel proclaims.
"IS TOO!" Xion exclaims,
and rushes the fallen Santa to a bed for rest and cookies.
"Xion... The little Replica?" A quiet voice murmers, a voice as quiet as a mouse.
"FOR THE LAST TIME! WE DO NOT HAVE MICE!!!" Axel shouts.
"I had you on the Nice list miss Xion..." Santa smiles.
"AWWW!!!!! THANNKS!" Xion grins, a grin that would warm your heart for miles.
"Xion, I have a great task for you." Santa says softly,
"I'll do it! Santa sir." Xion says with an expression change most slightly.
"You must drive my sleigh tonight, only you can."
"WHAT?!" Both narrator and girl shriek, and even the man.
"ENOUGH WITH THE DAMN RHYME!" Axel yells and smacks the narrator.
"OW!"
"I'll do it!" the Replica said,
and she left Santa to rest in bed.
As quick as a flash,
Xion put on Santa's spare suit and up the chimney she bashed.
"...." Carrying the presents, the little child left under 16 trees,
an art book, Keyblades, and even for the flowers a hive for bees.
"Done!" She pulled out the list
and checked it twice. To see who had been naughty and who had been nice.
Up the chimney she went,
careful not to snap the wire she was carrying, not to get it bent.
"AHEM! On.... I don't know your names.." Xion says worried.
"Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! on Cupid! on, Donder and Blitzen!" Called out the Dancing Flame's Flurry.
"AXEL!" The Sleigh sped off, carrying the Nobodies.
"Why did you two came?" Xion asked,
the narrator says
"Xion, you might need our skills! My magic and Axel's...." She trails off, unsure on what to say.
"...... Do with as you may." And to the first house, they landed.
Aerith's house, with it's towers banded.
".. Of course." Xion gets out of the sleigh and in the snow, just for a moment, lay.
"...." She sits up, cheerful and determined.
Down the chimney she slid,
landing at the bottom with a skid.
Down in her room, the Great Ninja Yuffie snoozed.
A THUD! she heard and as quick as a flash grabbed her ninja star.
"SHH!" Xion hissed
and looked behind her to see if there was anything she had missed.
"A Materia for Yuffie,
a ball for Goofy.
Bullets for Leon,
and of course cookies for Xion!
A sword for Cloud,
geez it's getting loud....
A hair dye set for Cid,
and... YIPE!"
Xion dodges the knife.
"WHO ARE YOU?!" Yuffie shouts and gets ready for a fight.
"YIKES!" Xion leaps across the room for the light.
"ENOUGH!!" Leon yells and slams the two fighters down.
"Geez...." Cloud groans, "Who's this clown?"
"I'M SANTA CLAUS DAMMIT!" Xion exclaims,
her distaste for the battle on her face plain.
"Santa?" Yuffie asks in a quiet voice,
her face exclaiming in cheerful rejoice.
"Course not-" Cloud starts, but down the chimney comes Axel.
"Dude, move it!" he snaps and then beats down them .. bastals.
As quick as light,
Xion moves rapidly without a fight,
dropping presents at the foot at the tree,
exclaiming
"Cookies here for me!"
Next to Sora's house they fled,
the Nobodies in their shiny red sled.
Down the chimney fell Xion in her Santa boots,
and the same procedure fell suit.
"A tie for Mr. Minami!
For Granny a new recipe for pastrami!
For Daddy, a new Keyblade chain,
for SoJu a tiny little plushy Dog's Bane!"
Taking a moment to snack,
up the chimney went Xion with her pack.
To Riku's house she sped,
falling only ONCE from her sled.
"A shelf for Mrs. Takamura,
A suit for MISTER Takamura,
a dozen boxes of candy for the littlest sis,
ooh! I forgot! This I can't miss!"
Xion drops her boxes, her bags,
her ribbons, and tags.
On the tree she had to place,
a tiny star with today's date.
"A sword for Mr. Dante,
and for Riku....
....... COAL?!" Xion looks surprised.
"Riku's so nice,
how'd he get this, this terrible present?" she asks, her heart filling with ice.
Solemnly she places the tiny black sack in his stocking,
her heart breaking, the tinsel seeming to be mocking.
A note to the readers it must be said,
Riku was still awake, sitting on his bed.
A sound of crying he happened to listen,
downstairs he went to see Xion with his presents under the tree missin'.
"It's so sad...
Riku and Daddy are gonna be mad!"
Xion says to herself,
munching on her gingerbread with a belch.
"But Riku's a nice lad!
Why should I leave this? He'll still be sad... "
Xion debating inside did not notice Riku hiding behind the door quietly.
"I'll leave him something!" Xion decided.
She pulls out a bag and leaves with the coal a small box.
Up the chimney Xion went.
Christmas was done, over and said.
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!" Xion exclaimed and went to see Santa in bed.
"The end!" Xion closes the book.
"XIOON! THAT DID NOT HAPPEN!" Axel yells.
"DID TOO!" Xion insists.
"Uhh... Nope! Did not." Riku puts in.
"YET." Xion says mysteriously.
Christmas Morning: Takamura Residence
"....." A small black bag.
"No way." Riku opens it.
"COAL!?!"
So did Xion save Christmas?
You guys be the judges!
Merry Christmas! Happy Kwanzaa! Happy Hanukkah! And any other holiday you celebrate!!!
And to all a good night!
Disclaimers: anything in here is my randomness and nothing else.