Well ... hell. How was she supposed to sleep now after he'd just said that?

'Warm for two'... and how incredibly sweet he'd just been ... given her his warm dry socks. And now he's just asleep. How can he just fall asleep like that?

And his hand underneath the blankets casually and gently resting over her lower abdomen. Not really that unusual, they have slept exactly like this about a million times before. Come to think of it, they had had sex like this about a million times before, with his hand right there, holding her firmly against his thrusts! She could feel her cheeks getting flushed at the memory of it!

What the hell is the matter with me? And why does it even matter where his hand is?

She tried to reason with herself again. This comforting thing he was doing right now, it'll never last. There is no happy ending in sight for them.

But her mind is spinning as she's trying to read in between the lines and gestures from him. 'It'll be alright' and 'warm for two' echoing over and over again in her head. No way she can just sleep now ... how the hell can he?

The man can eat and apparently also sleep - no matter what the situation is! God, he's so damn frustrating sometimes ... and I love him ... damn it! No, damn him!

So she tries her best to fall asleep. Closed her eyes and tries her best to sleep. And she's lying there for quite some time, but she just can't. She knew he was asleep, she could tell by the steady and even rhythm of his breathing. But frankly she doesn't give a damn. She needs to talk or be distracted ... something from him!

"Sawyer? Are you awake?"

No Answer.

She moved around, turning around to be face to face with him. In the process his hand that had rested on her stomach now found itself cupping her ass. And as if on instinct, he squeezed it hard and pulled her closer at the same time, while he let out a low grunt. But she could tell he was still sleeping.

He's just unbelievable ... groping me even in his sleep!

She slowly wiggled herself out of his tight grip and got up. Her mind was racing, as she slowly paced around the tiny room. There's so much she wanted to say to him. But then again, she couldn't even really word what exactly she wants to say to him at all.

She just wants some sort of solution. Here and now. She wants to know where they are at this point. Maybe she just needs him to say it one more time. Needs him to say that there is no starting over for them. Those words one more time coming out of his mouth, and then maybe she can finally put all of this behind her. Maybe then she can finally move on.

She watches him sleep. How he just lays there, perfect the way he is ... on the outside anyways! Can think of only two other people as beautiful as him ... Aaron and Clementine! But for a man, he's the only one ... envies him for those long eyelashes, longer then her own. And how he seems to have this sun kissed skin all year around.

She had pitied him at times when they'd first made it off the island together. The memory came back as if it was yesterday. With her standing in her kitchen ... Claire's kitchen now, looking out onto the patio, watching him sit on the back porch smoking with his back to the house ... his back to her. She smiled sadly at the memory of it all. How he sat there all alone, lost in his own thoughts. Wondering at the time if he was thinking about Juliet at moments like these. How she thought how sad it was that he had nobody else to go to. How he'd show up every day unannounced, yet call on the days he wouldn't make it over. And she also remembered the moment when she'd stopped pitying him ... it was the moment when she realizes that she was just as alone in the world as he was!

Silently wishing that she could read his mind as she watched him sleep. He looked so peaceful nowadays in his sleep. It wasn't always like that. There had been a few, not many, nights they'd spend together in his tent when he'd start shaking and she'd wake him up ... nightmares. And sometimes he'd still have them in L.A., even after they'd gotten married.

And she did too. She had the same nightmares over and over again, him on his knees with the gun to his head. And sometimes it would be him jumping from the helicopter that would startle her out of her sleep. Or the one where Claire was in Aaron's bedroom. Then after he'd made it of the island alive and well, those nightmares had been replaced with a new one ... Claire's angry face hovering over her with that knife to her throat, but in her dream nobody came to her rescue. Not even Locke.

Claire had nightmares too. She found that out the hard way one night after they'd moved in together. That scream that had come out of Claire's bedroom that night was one of the worst things she'd ever heard. And the look on Carole's face as they both managed to rush to her bedroom door at the same exact moment had been just as painful. But she was better now ... they all were better now. The things that happened on this island will probably haunt them for the rest of their lives but they'll have to manage somehow. After all, going to a psychiatrist wasn't really an option for them ... they had to manage on their own ... helping each other.

She smiled suddenly when she realized that she had needed that lonely man smoking on that back porch just as much as he'd needed them. Probably even more then he had needed her ... that became pretty clear to her now.

But him leaving her again to come back here to protect this hellhole ... she wondered if that would be her new nightmare once she got back home. And will it completely replace 'crazy Claire' or just be alternating?

Kate found herself restless. She just couldn't sleep; she was too fidgety with all those thoughts running through her head. Something was different. Something within her had changed. She'd told him the truth about being sick. And she'd even told him about her plans of running. And somehow ... although still in disbelieve about it all herself, she'd even told him that she might be pregnant!

This way she felt now, she just couldn't place it.

As she sat right there in the chair, with her legs pulled underneath her, watching him sleep on the ground ... she felt distant from him. Not just physically, but like she didn't know who he was anymore. He wasn't that man on the back porch anymore ... he didn't need her anymore like he had then. He'd proven that when he left her. Somehow this island had given him a purpose in life that seemed to fulfill him more than anything else. And it broke her heart all over again, that she would never be enough for him.

There is no starting over for us.

She doesn't know how long she sat there and wondered about their future together, but eventually she settled back down next to him and fell asleep. But things have to change. They needed to have a real talk about it all, she needed an answer from him, once and for all. And she would just have to accept it, whatever the answer would be.

She lowered herself onto the makeshift bed again and pushed the blankets out of his face, "Sawyer, wake up?" She shook him slightly, "Come on, wake up!"

He slowly opened his eyes and stared up at her. He drawled, "What's wrong Freckles?"

"I know how to get out of here." There was excitement in her voice.

This immediately got his attention, and he tried to sit up, wiping the sleep out of his eyes. "How?"

She hesitated for a moment, wondering if she should show him the tape, but instead she just explained, "There's a button in Jack's room, that makes the water disappear somehow."

"What? How do you know that?"

She reluctantly told him, "They recorded Jack, and I started to watch the tape this morning, when I couldn't sleep anymore. Anyway, he ..."

"Wait, you watched the tape with Jack on it?" he was unable to hide the jealous undertone in the question.

She had to keep herself from rolling her eyes at him, "Yes, James. I watched the tape with Jack because I was curious. Anyway, either Jack or Juliet somehow opened that same door, and the water came rushing in. And even though you can't see it on the tape, but Juliet yells at him to push the button, and then the water disappears again."

"Juliet was there?" he asked rather surprised.

"Yeah, Juliet was there." Again she had to fight the urge to show her how annoyed she was with him.

He pushed the blankets completely off of him and got up, she followed suit and watched him just stand there in silence.

"Do you wanna see it?"

"What?" he spun around to look at her.

"The tape. Do you wanna see it?"

He shook his head, "No thanks. The doc and Jules ... I guess I'll take your word for it."

Without another word Sawyer walked into the bathroom, turned the faucet on and splashed water into his face. It was more of an attempt to move past the awkwardness of the moment. Juliet and Jack ... even after all this time, they were both still a sore spot for Kate and him ... or maybe more for him then for Kate.

Kate stood there for a moment watching him. Stunt by his lack of excitement, ... is he really mad at her for watching Jacks tape? He can't be serious.

She ran out of patience and pushed the chair right underneath the vent and climbed up. She was struggling, but still managed to climb all the way up and pulled herself into the vent without his help.

Sawyer reappeared out of the bathroom, "Kate? Where the hell are you?"

She had already crawled all the way to the t-section of the vent, but came back around when she heard him call for her.

Poking her head out of the vent, "I'm going to push that button so you can get out of here?"

"Are you out of your damn mind Freckles?"

She stared at him like he had just spoken Chinese, "What is the matter with you? Don't you want to get out of here?"

He stared up at her, "'Course I wanna get out, but that's a long dive ... and if it doesn't work, what then?"

She pushed a stray curl behind her hair, "What do you mean?"

"I mean I don't want you to dive, and then the stupid button doesn't work and you ... you know what I mean Freckles." He couldn't finish the sentence. But she could read it in his eyes. He was worried about her.

Now she rolled her eyes at him, "It's not a long dive if I go in the way I came in first, down that ladder. I know I can make it. And once I'm in it ..."

"Get back down Freckles." His voice was demanding, no room for negotiation.

She raised her eyebrows at this demand, "Don't give me orders. I can do whatever I want." And with that she started to back up into the vent. Who the hell does he think he is?

"Freckles, wait. We need to talk about this, it isn't safe and you know it. I'll be fine until Ben and them show up, I'm sure there is another one of those buttons somewhere else." He tried the calmer and more reasonable approach this time.

"Look, I'm gonna go do this, whether you like it or not." And she was gone ... retrieving into the vent.

He climbed onto the chair, but he couldn't reach her ... because he couldn't climb in after her. "Freckles, if you do this...!" he gave a half-hearted warning that basically amounted to nothing.

She knew he was right there on that chair, and she wasn't stupid enough to get close enough again so that he'd pull her out. Instead she stopped and answered him from within the vent, "What James? If I do this then what? You'll leave me?" she said with a mocking sarcastic ring to her voice. And when he didn't answer, she continued "I see you in a couple minutes."

His fist hit the side of the vent opening hard, "Damn it Freckles, come back. I have to tell you something." He was almost yelling.

No answer. But he heard her still moving around in the vent.

"Freckles, listen to me. Come back." Out of desperation he yelled out what he wanted her to know for a long time, but never had the guts to tell her, "THE RING WAS MEANT FOR YOU."

Silence. No more sounds at all.

Then he heard her from a far, "What ring?" She knew what ring he was talking about, but she couldn't believe that's what he was actually saying.

"You know what ring. The one I threw into the ocean ... way back when ." He sighed, "... when we were sitting on the dock."

First he didn't hear anything. She wasn't moving anymore, but she wasn't speaking either.

Then she answered him, barely able to speak because of the tears already streaming down her face, "That's low ... even for you Sawyer." Was all he could heard.

"FRECKLES!" he yelled again one more time, but she was gone.

He climbed off the chair, picked it up and threw it across the small room.

"SON OF A BITCH!"

Anger was written all over his face when he focused his attention on the monitors, checking camera after camera to see where she was at.

What the hell is she thinking? God, she is so stubborn ... won't even wait long enough to discuss this. It's a god damn suicide mission. The water has freezing temperatures, and if anything goes wrong ... if that button doesn't work, she might not make it out in time and ...

He didn't even want to finish that thought! His eyes were focused on the camera in 'Jack's room', hoping that she'd be alright. He was frustrated beyond believe ... what if something went wrong, he'd have to watch helplessly. He couldn't get out to help her ... and that thought alone was killing him!

She made it all the way to the hatch door. Hovering above the opening and staring down into the water.

If she wanted to be able to dive that far to push the button, she had to calm down again first. Big tears were still running down her face and she wiped at them furiously.

She just couldn't believe he would say such a thing, just to get her not to dive. Doesn't he understand how heartbreaking it was to hear from him that he was going to propose to Juliet? And now he would just say something like this to stop me from leaving ... that son of a bitch.

He frantically tried to open the damn door again. Eventually it unlocked, and when he opened it water came gushing in on him.

And there she was. Right outside his door. Soaked top to bottom and with a pissed off look on her face. Water still up to her thighs. First he was relieved to see that she was okay, but then that relieve turned into anger.

"What the hell where you thinking?" He screamed at her, "DAMN IT KATE, YOU COULD HAVE DROWNED!"

She came charging towards him, and pushed him back with all the strength she could muster after that exhausting dive. He toppled back a bit, unprepared for her attack and off balance due to the water that was still surrounding them. .

"You son of a bitch!" She hissed when she came charging at him again.

This time he was expecting it, but he let her have a go for it. Then he grabbed her wrists and pushed her against the wall with her arms up above her head.

"What the hell is wrong with you Freckles?" He didn't understand why she was mad at him.

"What's wrong with me?" She would have slapped him. "How can you use that ring story to keep me from diving? Out of all the things you could have said, that's what you chose to say to get me to come back?" She struggled against him.

He stared at her in awe. Didn't understand a damn thing she just said, but finally he realized what she was saying, "It wasn't just a story girl, it's the god damn truth."

Their eyes locked on each other and when her chin began to quiver and tears were pricking at her eyes she finally looked away from him, "Let go of me James." She demanded from him. Her voice full of emotion ... she could barely contain the hurt and anger she felt.

He sighed and let go of her hands, taking a step back. "Look, I'm sorry ... I know I should have told you a long time ago."

She didn't say anything. She couldn't even look at him anymore. Instead she just walked back into the security room, grabbed her things and stuffed them into her backpack.

He followed her suit, "Look, let me explain ..." he sighed, "I was upset, cause you said you only came after me to find Claire. Said you came back to the island to get Claire ... not because of me."

She wouldn't have any of it, and when she tried to leave the room, he blocked the doorway. "Hey, just let me explain." He wasn't beyond begging at this point ... but he'd never imagined she'd be this upset after all this time.

After two failed attempts of trying to get around him and out of the door, she finally looked up at him, "You don't need to explain anything to me anymore James." She shook her head, and her chin began to quiver again before she spoke, "You were right ... there is no starting over for us. You're staying and I'm leaving. This thing with us is finished."

Pain was written all over his face and the look in his eyes spoke volumes, but none of it mattered anymore.

She wiped away a tear before she spoke again, "It's finally done Sawyer. You and I are done!" With this she made another attempt to get out of the door and he just stepped aside and let her pass.

He watched her in disbelieve as she climbed up the ladder and disappeared.

She ran. She ran as fast as she could. Too afraid that he might be going after her and say something to her that would make her change her mind. He had that power over her. No matter what he'd done or said, she'd eventually forgive him ... because she felt so incredibly much for him. But not this time. She can't do this anymore. This emotional rollercoaster ride has to stop eventually. So she put an end to it, once and for all. She'll leave this place, have this baby and start a new life.

I'll be alright, won't I? After all, I've raised a baby by myself before ... I can do it again. I can give this child all the love it will ever need ... he won't even be missed at all.

Tears fell down her face. If she could only convince herself that he wouldn't be missed, when she already missed him the moment she climbed up that ladder.

Five days had passed since their fight in the security room.

They spoke the bare minimum whenever they crossed paths, which was obviously unavoidable at times. But she avoided the kitchen, showers or any other place whenever he was heading that way. She'd moved into another room altogether to sleep. Overall she made it very obvious to him, that she wanted no contact with him ... if that was at all possible.

He spent all his time working on the raft to distract himself. He'd pack food and water to last him throughout the day. He left as soon as he woke up, came back before sun down to shower, eat and go to sleep. But even with all the work, he just couldn't stop himself from thinking about her. He'd even lost his appetite, but ate anyways, just because he needed the energy to get the raft finished. Every night he'd pass the room she'd turned into her new bedroom, he stopped and wondered. Wondered if he should knock and try to talk to her, but he didn't. If she was ready to talk, she'd come to him. Wouldn't she?

She would hear his footsteps in the hall, then they would stop and she knew he was right outside her door. Every time that happened she was basically holding her breath, hoping he'd just keep on walking. She avoided him, 'cause she didn't wanna give into him once again ... and she knew she would. If he'd look at her that way, or smile at her with those darn dimples and then declare his love for her again ... she knew she would fall for it and the entire circle would start all over again.

But everything was about to change this morning ...

Kate slowly got up out of her bed and sat up. She had been laying there until she was sure that he was gone and on his way to the beach. She had waited until she heard that front door fall shut behind him. She didn't wanna run into him, so she'd patiently waited it out.

As she was looking for something to wear, she'd realized that she didn't have any clean clothes left. "Guess today will be laundry day?" she whispered to herself. Wondering immidiatly if she was starting to go insane since she was starting to talk to herself more and more lately. She piled all the dirty laundry up on the floor and pulled a t-shirt on over her head. The shirt was long enough to reach right above her knees, and she decided that it would have to do until the laundry was done. She pulled on a pair of flip flops she had found and headed for the kitchen to get something for breakfast first.

As she walked down the hallway she was thinking to herself that she was actually feeling better for the first time in days. Maybe avoiding him was the key to it all. The key to move on. But that thought vanished the moment she walked into the kitchen, when she noticed the five full water bottles sitting on the counter next to the sink.

Damn it. He forgot his water. That meant he would probably be back any moment. She hurried to get herself a bowl of cereal, determined to get back to her room before he'd show up to get his water. But it was too late.

She heard the door down the hall squeak and then she heard footsteps approaching. Determent to give him the cold shoulder, she turned her back towards the door and focused her full attention to the cereal box in front of her. But she couldn't drown him out in her head, somehow she ended up listening to the footsteps after all and that's when she realized it. The strides were different. More than one person was walking down that hall and it didn't sound like Sawyer's footsteps at all.

But right in that moment. Right when she came to that realization, she got hit into the back of the head with something. Everything went grey as her knees buckled and she fell to the ground. She opened her eyes one last time and she saw a man leaning over her. Panic was rising in her, but she was helpless. "Who do we have here? This island was suppose to be deserted!" he said before he hit her over the head with the butt of his gun one more time.

She couldn't stop it from happening when her eyes rolled back into her head ... the pain of the blow to her skull too much.

She was out cold!

End Note: Please leave a review if you have a moment to spare, it's much appreciated. Thank you!