Me: Wednesday story! WOOHOO!
Finn: Oh, I'm enthralled.
Me: Using big words. Finn's becoming smarter. Everyone run for your lives. –sarcasm-
Finn: Oh, ha ha ha. –sarcasm-
Me: I'm writing this on Monday because we have the day off! YES!
Finn: Meaning we can do nothing.
Me: Except for this. ON WITH IT.
Chapter Whatever
Kat POV
Having being caught with the avian flu forever, I had to give it back to the Maximum Ride house, so they weren't too happy with me, but oh well! I poked through my mailbox to retrieve some letters. Finding several sitting in there from two months ago, I decided to deliver those.
"Hocus Pocus Abrakadabra Alakazam FINN'S HOUSE!" With a flash, I was standing on the TV. Maybeck jumped and fell out of his chair.
"What the heck!" he yelled.
"Sorry," I said sarcastically. I hopped down and glanced at what he was watching. "Wheel of Fortune?"
"No, it… it's on commercial."
"That's a very TV-like, and lengthy commercial. Rethink yourself, Beck-Beck." I patted his head before looking through to see if he got a letter.
"No letter for Beck-Beck! Aww… but get out of my chair before I get back. Clear?" He nodded and I saw him make a face as I turned around.
"I can see you."
Maybeck coughed and ran into the kitchen. All I do is win. I went up the stairs to Philby's room. He was sleeping! My perfect opportunity! I crept closer to him and studied my scene. How could I do this? I took his mail and set it on the carpet. I very carefully covered him in a blanket and tied it to the mattress. I flicked on the lights.
"WAKE UP!" I screamed and Philby sat up with a start. Or at least tried to. He thrashed around for a few moments, trying to pull up the blanket. I ran away so he wouldn't know it was me. He'd know it was me.
Philby POV
"It's something I've always wanted to do," Willa said, looking up at me.
"And what is that?" I asked. I was confident. I was cool. I was awesome. Willa leaned forward, her lips almost to mine when…
"WAKE UP!" someone screamed, giving me a heart attack. I jolted up to find myself pinned to the bed. I waved my arms around, trying to move the blanket so I could sit up. When I freed myself, I looked around and didn't see anyone. I swung my legs over the bed to get up and find this person who ruins my dreams, but stepped on a pile of mail and fell to the floor. Kat. I picked up one letter and read it.
Dear Philby,
Just wondering if you've ever actually read the Lord of the Rings books. Because they're really long, and out of all the Kingdom Keepers, you're the only one I would have expected to actually read through the books.
Oh, and also, YOU ARE EPICALLY AWESOME. ahem...*clears throat*
Your relatively sane friend,
Kestrel
I smirked. Of course I was epically awesome.
Dear Kestrel,
I have read the Lord of the Rings books, and no one else in the Kingdom Keepers has. Aragorn is my favorite, just saying. Maybeck isn't smart enough to have finished the first chapter. I know I am epically awesome, and so are you.
Sincerely,
Philby
Willa POV
Based on the terrified scream I heard, Kat was here. And I was right. She came bouncing down the stairs and almost stepping on a cat.
"Why is there a cat here?" she asked, picking it up.
I shrugged.
"I think Finn found it."
"And he brought it in?"
"Maybe. Finn, come here!" Amanda called. Finn walked in and saw the cat.
"Isn't that the cat from outside?"
"Did you bring it in?" I asked.
"Er, no."
"Well how did it-" Jess started.
"It's mine! It followed me here!" Kat interrupted loudly.
"Why didn't you say that earlier?"
"I forgot."
"You forgot you had a cat," Jess repeated.
"Yes."
"How in the world could you-"
"Letters for Willa!" Kat interrupted again, throwing some mail at me.
"Gee thanks," I said.
"Where's Charlene?"
"Outside, I think…"
"When you're done, get Philby and go into the living room, letters to all." I sighed as she opened the glass door and started screaming like she was being murdered. That would bring Charlene over. I opened the first letter.
Dear Willa,
Actually, I know what Gale did. * tear *. Skittles told me grrrrrrrrrrrrr. But I don't know how, where, or why, so please don't tell me anymore. Thx!
~ CANT STAND GALE MANDY ~
Dear ~ CANT STAND GALE MANDY ~,
I was confused at that part, but hopefully you would've read it by now. My lips are sealed. FOR NOW. But Gale is better.
Peace Around The World,
Willa
I felt someone staring at me as Bill Gates came and took my letter. I looked up and Jess was staring at me.
"Um, Jess?" I asked, waving my hand in front of her face.
"NERRRRF!" she shouted, twitching her hands over her chest.
"Uh…"
"NERRRF!" she shrieked again and ran into the living room. That was weird.
Next letter!
Dear Willa,
You, Amanda and Philby are my favorite, could you tell them that? And also: Do you like being smart?
Lex
I grinned. Of course I love being smart, and being someone's favorites. Usually it was Maybeck or Finn that's a favorite. Or Charlene.
Dear Lex,
I'm glad I'm one of your favorites!
I paused to yell through the house.
"LEX'S FAVORITES ARE AMANDA AND PHILBY!"
"THANKS!" Amanda hollered. Philby grunted. I turned and saw him fall down the stairs.
Philby and Amanda thank you. I enjoy being smart, but not as smart as Philby. I don't read Chemistry before I go to bed. If anything, it's to help me go to sleep.
Peace Around The World,
Willa
Charlene POV
My first thought was, "Someone's hurt!" and I came running to their aid. And then I saw Kat.
"Oh," I said, disappointed. I had just taken life-saving courses and I wanted to use them.
"Got you," Kat said, holding a cat in one arm and mail in the other.
"What's with the cat, Kat?" I asked, grinning at my joke.
"I'm dying of laughter. Here's your mail." She handed me a couple letters.
"And then in the living room?" I asked.
"Yerp! FLUFFY CHAIR!" she yelled, charging off to the living room. She had closed the sliding glass door behind her, so she was running straight into the door.
"Kat watch out!" I exclaimed as she hit it. And went right through the walls. Okay…
Dear Charlene,
What if I told you I was going to give Finn the letter that said you thought he was cute?
~Scarlet~
Die, I thought.
Dear ~Scarlet~,
I would die inside. Or run and hide. Or try and burn it or rip it to pieces. Overreaction? No, I'm a girl!
Love,
Charlene
I held the letter up and a flying TV swooped down. I shrieked as it carried my letter away. I was expecting an owl or something! Gosh, that TV was going to kill somebody, I thought as it went sailing over the rooftops. It hit a chimney, breaking it cleanly, and staggering through the sky. I saw King Leonidas screaming at the TV angrily. Nice place to hit, TV.
Dear Charlene
I KNOW RIGHT! LOGEY IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO CUTE!
~ Mandy Henderson ~
P.S.- I CALL DIBS! IM GOING TO MARRY HIM IM GOING TO MARRY HIM!
I frowned. Logan was MINE!
Dear ~Mandy Henderson~
NO! He's mine! ALL MINE!
Love,
Charlene Henderson
Amanda POV
I tried to talk Maybeck out of the chair, but he wouldn't leave.
"I'm fine," he growled.
"Say that when you're dumped in a garbage can in the morning," I replied. I stormed into the kitchen and got some pretzels from the pantry. When I turned around, Kat was standing right in front of me. Like her nose was a centimeter from my eye. I jumped back a bit, terrified by her silent appearance. I didn't bother to turn the light on in the pantry and I could see a glint in her eye.
"Mail," she said calmly. She turned walked out, then started yelling. Things crashed, I heard something break and an "OW!". Not long after, I saw Maybeck icing his ankle.
"I told you to move," I said. He growled at me.
Dear Amanda,
Did you know that I have you locked in a closet with a blind cat? And that Finn is flying from Florida to California to find you?
Sincerely yours,
MoonXRain
So. I was in a closet… with a blind cat. And Finn was coming to save me. AW! He was coming to save me! But why was I in a closet with a blind cat?
"Maybeck, are we in a closet?" I asked.
"MAYBECK IS!" Kat yelled from the chair, and I resisted the urge to laugh.
"No…?" he said, glaring at Kat from the kitchen.
"I saw that!" and a walnut flew out of nowhere, hit Maybeck, then disappeared.
Dear MoonXRain,
I did not know that I was in a closet. Kat says that Maybeck is. A blind cat? Is that the cat that Kat has? That was a confusing question. How nice of Finn for coming to save me.
Sincerely,
Amanda
Kat POV
While I was sitting on the chair, mentally hitting Maybeck with a walnut, I opened some of the letters to me.
Dear Kat,
How can you be Team Gale? He's EVIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLL!
~Mandy Mellark~
I sighed.
Dear ~Mandy Mellark~,
How can you be Team Peeta? He does NOTHHIIIINNNNNGGGG!
From,
Kat Hawthorne
I held it up and Bill Gates picked it up, flying out of the window that was closed. Next letter!
Dear Kat,
How do you like Jennifer Lawrence as Katniss in the movie? Or how do you like the cast in general? We both STRONGLY disagree with it! So, Yaa. Peace.
Peeta and Skittles
Well hello Peeta. We meet again. FOR THE LAST TIME!
Dear –disgust- and Skittles,
I didn't really have a strong opinion on who is what, but I think the cast is okay. I don't disagree with it, but maybe it could've been better. Oh, and as for Bread Boy… LOSE SOME WEIGHT! HAHHAHAHA!
From,
Kat Hawthorne
"OKAY EVERYBODY IN HERE NOW!" I yelled. One by one, they all slowly trickled in. Maybeck sat on a spinny chair, Finn, Charlene and Amanda sat on the couch. Jess sat on the floor, and Philby sat in a regular chair. My cat sat on my armrest.
"I've been expecting you," I said. Everyone groaned.
"Fine! First letter!
Keepers and Kat,
Have any of you seen 'how to succeed in business without really trying' on Broadway STARRING DANIEL RADCLIFFE? IT'S AWESOME!
~ Mandy Finch ~
"Unfortunately, Broadway isn't around here. Kat, could you make a fictional Broadway?"
"Starring who, Harry Potter as Daniel Radcliffe as his character? You can do that, that's way too much work. With bear-hounds, Finn, and the quest…"
"Me?" Finn asked. I coughed.
"Nothing."
"You said-"
"BACON!" I shouted.
"What?"
Dear ~Mandy Finch~
We don't have Broadway, but it sounds funny. Was it funny and musical? DID YOU SEE DANIEL RADCLIFFE?
From,
Kat, Philby, Maybeck, Finn, Charlene, Willa, Amanda, Jess, and my cat.
I set it on the table and Dumbledore, the newest owl, took it. He crashed into the wall before getting out. He was a bit retarded. Dumbledore at Character Academy wouldn't like it if he found out I named a retarded owl after him.
Dear All,
I can see you. I'm always watching you. I know where you live. I'm watching you as I write this letter. I memorized your address. I'm closer than you think.
Bret
"Who is that?" Amanda asked, terrified.
"A stalker?" Charlene asked.
"Is he gonna eat us?" Philby added.
"Is he going to kill us?" Finn worried.
"Rent a hotel," Maybeck declared.
"Call the cops," Willa argued.
"SEND THE CELERY ARMY!" I exclaimed. They all stopped spazzing and looked at me.
"A celery army?"
"No, it's a potato army. I just made that up so you'd listen."
"A potato ar-"
"Bret is a stalker! Clarified, and out of the way!"
Dear Bret,
You're in my closet. I have taser. I'm prepared! -cue Scar and Hyenas dancing- -'Be Prepared starts playing-
From,
Kat, Maybeck, Philby, Finn, Amanda, Jess, Charlene, Willa and my cat.
Me: And there you have it. Chapter Whatever.
Finn: Glad we take the time to look and see what it is.
Me: Soy perezosa.
Finn: Um. Quick question, who's the cat?
Me: AH! You caught the cat!
Finn: It wasn't that hard. You even signed the letters with 'my cat'.
Me: Clever boy! BUT YOU CAN'T CATCH ME! –throws arms down- -disappears in smoke-
Finn: -coughs- What? Kat?
Read and Review? How does Kat do this? Just talk? Um. Well, she's posting on Wednesdays because she's supposed to be writing a novel until March 21st, I think. ANYWAY. So, it'll be a random story. Hint as to next week's: Venice Beach. All I can say, because I don't know. Okay, bye. -Finn