Chapter 5: Comfort

"Welcome, gentlemen. I'm glad you could all come to my meeting." Loogie sat at the head of the table. He brushed off the creases in his suit and did his best to cover up the spaghetti stains before addressing his cohorts.

"As you may know, several of South Park's criminals have been killed recently. These previously healthy individuals have been dying of unexplained heart attacks. What does this have to do with us, I hear you ask?" Loogie paused as one of the people around the table had put their hand up.

"None of us said anything, sir."

"It's a figure of speech, Thompson." Loogie sighed. "Anyway, as I was saying, the deaths of our competitors will make things easier for us as we will have less… Thompson?"

Thompson was foaming at the mouth, spasming as he tried to pull at his shirt, before falling out of his chair.

"Help… me…" Thompson was able to weakly force the words out of his mouth before the heart attack killed him. Loogie addressed the remaining men.

"Perhaps we should forget about the meeting and go put our affairs in order. I get the feeling we won't live to see tomorrow morning."

00000

Kenny was asleep in his room. Given his dual identities as Mysterion and Kira, he wasn't getting much sleep at night. Instead, he found himself taking short naps whenever he could. On this occasion, he was woken by the sound of crying. His sister Karen ran into the room in floods of tears.

"What's wrong?" Kenny asked.

"Mysterion's gone bad!" Karen sobbed. "The television said bad people are dying and they think maybe Mysterion's doing it."

"Hey now." Kenny hugged Karen to try and calm her down. "Maybe it's not Mysterion doing it. They don't know for sure yet."

"But Mysterion knows who I am! What if he's going to kill me?" Karen cried even harder.

"Mysterion wouldn't dream of killing you, Karen. After all, he is your guardian angel, and he would never do anything to hurt you. I know that for a fact."

Kenny let Karen wipe her tears on his sleeve. "Besides, if Mysterion is killing people, it's only bad people. You're a good girl, and if bad people are dying, it makes South Park a safer place to live for good people like you." Karen stopped crying.

"Thanks, Kenny. You always know how to make me feel better." Kenny breathed a sigh of relief as Karen turned to leave. As she left, Karen asked a question Kenny did not expect to hear.

"Are you cold now since you don't cover up your head anymore?"

00000

Over at the Marsh household, Stan was watching the news with his father and grandfather.

"Kira strikes again!" The newscaster reported. "Rumours suggest that the killer, who refers to himself as Kira, can kill people without needing to be near them. It is believed that he kills by acquiring the name and face of a person, but what happens then is unclear. Since the victims thus far have all been criminals, the suspects for Kira include anyone with access to criminal records, including the town's superheroes such as Mysterion or the Coon. Nevertheless, it is recommended that people remain vigilant if they see any suspicious behaviour and report it to the police."

The news report ended, and Stan covered his ears. He knew what was going to happen next.

"AAAAARRRGGGHHH!"

"Randy! What's wrong?" Sharon ran into the room to see what had made Randy overreact this week.

"Supernatural serial killers who don't need to be near anyone to kill them!"

Before Sharon could do anything, Randy thrust the phone book at her.

"Phone everyone in town and tell them to disguise themselves! I'm going to the attic to get our Halloween costumes!"

"D'you hear that, Billy?" Grandpa said. "This Kira pecker kills criminals. I'm off to raise some hell!"

Stan looked around as his family worked themselves up into a frenzy. He shut his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Dude, this is pretty fucked up right here."

00000

"Hello, South Park Police Station. Do you have any information on suspicious behaviour for the Kira inquiry?"

"Gah! Too much pressure!"