Wow, fast update! Look at me go! Okay so for the last chapter I got so many review alerts and favorite story alerts all at one time and I was so happy and excited I almost started crying (It was only 8, but hey, I'm a starving artist)! And I'm not one to cry a lot! So thank you guys so much for reading this and actually sticking with it with the large periods of times inbetween. I'm real sorry for that, by the way. It'll be easier once school and finals are over in like...1 week. Yayy summer! But okay, let's move on.

Thank you to all those people again! Seriously, I love you guys, that was insane.

Same disclaimer as always. I don't own the boys of Big Time Rush.

Screams.

Screams were all I heard in the two minutes that followed Kendall turning on the light.

I must say, though, Kendall is the only one that doesn't have a high pitched scream.

Basically everything turned to chaos, it seemed. I only stood there in shock staring at Kathy's lifeless body hanging from the ceiling. She had two deep gashes on her wrists where it looked as if blood was still leaking out. Other cuts on her arms accompanied the gashes, but they definetly weren't as deep. What probably fascinated yet disgusted me the most was her head. Obviously her neck was broken, it drooped at an awkward angle. The only thing that was still holding her up was the head itself. Her eyes were opened halfway and a trail of blood coming from the corner of her mouth. I could see James and Carlos holding on to eachother out of the corner of my eye. I wasn't sure what Kendall and Logan were doing since they were behind me. But the only thing I could focus on was that I found a new reason to hate churches.

"Holy...that isn't...?" Kendall asked over James and Carlos' screams.

"Kathy...yeah." I whispered.

"Oh my God...this isn't even-Guys! Stop!" Kendall yelled at the two. Their voices died down, but they didn't let go of eachother. Logan walked over with wide eyes and an open mouth.

"Wow... It's really her, isn't it?" He said, standing closer to the body. "My Lord, you can barely tell it is her." James and Carlos let go of eachother then. They came to where Logan, Kendall and I were standing. James moved and was next to me. "Look at all the blood on the floor!"

James and I looked under what was Kathy only to see a half-dried pool of blood on the floor. We jumped away in disgust.

"...Ow, Sam. Let go." I heard James whine. I noticed that I had a death grip on his arm. I let go and muttered an apology.

"Logan," Carlos called. "What happened?"

Logan shrugged. "I'm really not sure. This is surreal." He moved to touch the body to examine it more when Kendall slapped his arm.

"Don't touch it! Are you insane?"

My eyes were as round as saucers at that point. I slowly looked down at my hands as my heart started to beat faster.

"Oh, GOD! I touched her!" I yelled. Everyone except James made an "ewww" sound. James looked at his arm and screamed.

"Aw, man! And you touched me!"

We both started screaming while trying to wipe our hads and arms off on something, anything. It was like I reached into her nonexistent soul. I had deeply hoped there was no blood on my hands or I might have to puke.

"Guys! Will you shut up?" Logan scolded. "We can still get caught, you know."

I swallowed. "Logan? I take it all back. You were right. You were so right and I'm sorry."

Logan stared up at the body and shrugged. "Don't be. We would've discovered this eventually."

"I can barely stand to look at this. I think I'm gonna be sick." James complained. I took a small step away from James and looked to Logan again.

Logan made a face of disgust. "Please don't." He looked around. His eyes fell on one of the first pews. Kendall looked to the same place and raised an eyebrow.

"What's that?"

Logan stepped down to pick it up. It was just a folded up piece of paper. Gently he unfolded it and skimmed it. "It's a suicide note."

Carlos looked over Logan's shoulder. "What's it say?" He asked.

" 'Dear whoever finds this, I'm sorry you had to find me like this. I couldn't take it anymore. If this is Ron reading this, know that I love you and you are the most wonderful husband a woman could ever have. I'd like you to have my father's company. I know I can trust you with it-' "

"Woah, woah, woah. Wait a second. What company?" Kendall questioned. Logan just shrugged.

"I don't know. I have never heard her talk about it before."

"Keep reading. What else does it say?" James asked.

" 'I know I can trust you with it and steer it in a good direction.' She spelled 'steer' and 'direction' wrong..."

"Logan!" Kendall and James scolded. "Just read the paper! We don't need to revise everything."

"But-"

"Just do it, Logan, please." I said tiredly. Logan sighed and continued reading.

" 'And if you can, sell the house. We really don't need it anymore. I'm so sorry you have to do everything else without me. Make some plan with the government or something...' " Logan made a face at the letter but didn't say anything. " 'As long as you leave this place forever that is fine with me. Do something good with yourself. Now, the reason I am killing myself is the reason why I wanted to start this whole adoption juvenile thing. The kids. The kids are horrible and drove me to do this. They are disrespectful and I have found no way to change their lives for the better. I have never met anyone as evil as those five-' "

"Bullshit!" James snapped. "We drove her to suicide? If anything it should be us committing suicide! She and Ron have been the worst people to stay with! She should speak for herself! I'd rather die than come here again. I'm slowly going insane because of it all and it's because of her!"

"James-" I tried.

"Shut up! Don't tell me to calm down or anything, don't you dare! We are standing next to a freaking dead body that you touched, by the way! And she's blaming us for everything!"

"I realize that, James. And it's not fair. Obviously something doesn't match up! But we can't just lash out on something automatically. Maybe we did cause her to take her own life, maybe not. We can deal with it later, but if you're not quiet now someone is going to find us!"

The front door suddenly started shaking. All of our heads snapped towards the noise. I was too paralyzed with sudden fear to even think about moving. But no one else was moving either.

Kendall swallowed loudly. "Guys. Guys guys guys!"

"Turn off the lights! Quick!" Logan ordered in a panic. James turned around and quickly grabbed all the lanterns. I swallowed and watched the door, which was still shaking. There were a few pounds on the door.

"Sam!" I heard someone say. Some one was pulling on my sleeve, too. I didn't dare look away from the door.

"Sammie! Come on!" I stumbled as they pulled harder on my sleeve. Carlos was tugging me to a closet at the front of the door. More pounds echoed through the church as everyone scrambled around.

"In here, guys!" Carlos called. He opened the door and threw me in. I hit the wall and swallowed thickly. James and Logan ran in with the lanterns, Logan quickly shutting off his. Kendall swung around with the door and shut it just as we heard the other doors open. Logan slapped James and harshly whispered to him to turn off the lantern. He did and the small closet was dark instantly. Kendall slowly opened the door a crack and looked out.

"Kendall!" I whispered. "What are you doing?"

"Shhh! I wanna see who's out there." He resumed looking back out while all of us crowded around to do the same. We could see a beam of like searching the place, like it was making sure it was secure. Someone walked through the aisle, and Kendall closed the door a bit more. They walked over to Kathy's body, shining the light on it. Someone (I'm assuming James) made a gagging sound. It was in a much better light and it was even worse than we thought. You could see the blood much clearer and it had turned into a very dark red.

We saw the shadow walking around the body a few times. It almost seemed like he knew someone else had been in there.

"Guys, we have to get out-...!" I sneezed, and it slightly echoed through the room. The door shut and I was slammed against the wall with James' hand over my mouth.

"Are you freaking insane? Do you want us to get killed?" He hissed through his teeth. I squeezed my eyes tight.

"Slamming her against the wall isn't going to make us any quieter, James!" Kendall yelled. Logan whacked Kendall.

"Well they probably know we're here now so let's get out of here!" Logan ordered.

Kendall opened the door and peeked out. Not two seconds later he shut the door and pressed his back to it.

"We have to get out of here and fast! ...I think he knows someone's in here." Kendall calmly stated.

"Not like I just said that or anything..." Logan grumbled.

"Um, James..." I mumbled through his hand. He turned to look at me and quickly stepped away.

"Sorry..." He muttered.

"Guys," Carlos whispered. "Are we trapped?"

"No, Carlitos, we're not trapped. Not yet..." Kendall assured him. He peeked out the door again and shut it quick. "Okay, we're going to go out there two at a time. I'll go last so I'll be alone."

"But Kendall, what if you get caught? What if any of us get caught?" I asked.

Kendall shook his head gently. "I'm not sure. You're going to have to trust me. Now, you have to stay as low as you can. You have to stay completely silent, too. We don't know who this is, or what they're capable of, and I'm wasting time trying to explain all of this. Carlos and Sam go first."

"What?" I asked in desbelief. "I'm not going out there first!"

"Do you have a better idea?" He challenged. I sighed, defeated, and stepped towards the door with Carlos. "Now you have to stay low. If he sees you, run. I don't care where, just run. We'll find you. But be as quiet as you can and go out the front door. Once you're out, run to the house. Go in the back door, and head up to your rooms. Don't stop for anything just get in your bed and act like you're sleeping. Okay? Got it?" He instructed. Carlos and I nodded shakily.

"I think so..." Carlos murmured. Kendall nodded once and opened the door just enough to let us through.

"Okay, go as quickly and quietly as you can."

"But Kendall-"

"Just go!" He ordered. Carlos slipped through first and I followed. We were maybe twenty feet from the door and I could see the stranger's flashlight searching the area. Carlos and I squatted behind the pews and moved as quietly as we could. The light slowly came closer to us and I panicked. I grabbed Carlos' shirt and pulled him down. We laid there as the light hovered over us for a couple seconds. When it finally moved away I let out a sigh of relief. I gently tapped the bottom of Carlos' shoe to get him going again. We crawled for a few more feet and I could feel my heart pounding. We had no idea who was in here and more importantly, why did he not freak out at the body hanging from the ceiling tht was covered in blood and, oh yeah, dead too? I suspected this person to know about this already. And for some reason, they didn't want anyone else knowing about it. How else would you explain his non-reaction to it? I know if that was me, I would have screamed my face off.

Oh yeah. I did.

We were only a few feet from the door now. I swear my heart was about to beat right out of my chest. Carlos stood up a little to grab the door.

"HEY!"

I think my heart just stopped.

I shut my eyes and waited for the light. I tried to say as quiet as I could. I finally opened my eyes, but when I did, they weren't shining the light on Carlos and I. It was pointed to the adjacent wall on our right. The wall the closet was on.

James.

James stood there like a deer in headlights. He was frozen. You could see the person walking towards James, almost in an angry manner rather than a concerened one. My heart started up again and thumping harder than ever before. I became frozen as well. And I feared the worst.

The figure continued to advance towards James, and I swallowed hard. I felt so scared for him and feared I was about to never see James again.

"Go! Run!" Kendall yelled as he pushed James out of the way. Suddenly Logan was by my side pushing me out the door.

Carlos was already ahead of us. I stumbled out as Logan continued to push me.

"Wait! Kendall! James! We have to go back! We can't just leave them there!" I shouted deperately.

"They'll be fine! Run, Sam!"

I forced my legs to go into a dead sprint. The adrenaline pumped through my veins. I had never been so terrified. It was almost like a game of cops and robbers, but this was the real thing. You didn't know what would happen if you got caught. In this case, one of us could end up like Kathy.

Kendall could end up like Kathy.

James could end up like Kathy.

The thought of that wanted me to run back and save them. I was only a few feet from the house now. I turned to run back but Logan grabbed me before I took another step.

"Sam, what are you doing? Are you insane?" He yelled.

"We can't just leave Kendall and James back there! They could die!"

"They'll be fine! They can take care of themselves! Don't worry about them!" He repeated, though it sounded like he was trying to convince himself rather than trying to convince me. "We have to go back in the house!"

He tugged my body towards the house, despite my protests. Eventually he slammed a hand over mouth.

"Sammie! If you don't shut up he's gonna find us! Do you want us to get killed?"

Remembering James said that to me not twenty minutes ago only made me thrash more.

"Sam, it's gonna be okay! We'll see them again! We have to get in there!" Logan ordered. He opened the back door an pulled me in. He let me go and locked the back door. I brushed some of my hair out of myself when I felt something wet. I was crying and apparently I wasn't done. I wiped my eyes furiously as Logan turned around. We stared at eachother for a moment before lunging at eachother in a hug. We held eachother tight, and I felt Logan was shaking.

"What the hell just happened?" He murmured into my shoulder. I pulled away and stared at his eyes. He wasn't crying but you could definetly tell he was scared beyond belief.

"Hey," I soothed. "It's okay, now. We're safe...I think. We'll figure it out. You're a genius. We'll get through it."

Logan nodded, attempting to smile but failing. He swallowed hard and nudged me forward. "We're not safe yet. We have to get upstairs. Get in bed, and act like nothing happened. You didn't hear or see anything, alright? This stays between the five of us."

"Or three of us." I muttered.

"Don't talk like that. They're coming back. It'll be better in the morning."

I nodded slowly, understanding. We headed up the stairs and quietly walked through the hall. I heard oter footsteps and I instantly froze, again.

"Do you hear that?" I whispered. Logan nodded, also frozen.

The footsteps stopped for a moment and a door squeaked open. Carlos' head peeked through and smiled in relief.

"Guys!" He squealed. He jumped out of his room and started running towards us.

"Oh my God, Carlos." I breathed as he almost tackled me in a hug. I hugged him as tight as I did Logan. He let go and hugged Logan just as forcefully.

"I'm so glad you guys are safe! Are you okay?" He asked once he released Logan. We both nodded shakily.

"Physically, yes. But emotionally we are so screwed up." Logan informed him.

"I have never been so terrified in my life." I admitted. Carlos gave a little chuckle.

"Me either. What a rush, but not the good kind."

Logan placed a hand on my shoulder. "I'm glad we're all okay. We have to get to bed before anyone finds us."

Carlos and I nodded. We began to walk to our bedrooms when Carlos said something.

"Wait, where are James and Kendall?" He asked. My stomach dropped at the thought of what might have happened.

"...We don't know." Logan admitted. "I'm not sure if they even followed us out of the Church."

Carlos' eyes became wide with concern. "Are they okay? Do you know?"

Logan and I slowly shook our heads back and forth.

"Well we have to go back and look for them! They could be dying!"

"See?" I turned to Logan. "We should have! They're your friends, Logan!"

"And they can look out for themselves! If not, eachother. Trust me, you guys. They'll be just fine." Logan persuaded. He looked hesitant.

"...You don't seem too sure of yourself." I commented.

"I'm worried too, okay? But I don't want to risk losing two more friends by going back there!"

"...If it meant getting the rest of us back together again, I'd take that risk." Carlos said. I nodded.

"Me too. You guys are some of the best friends I've ever had in this past month."

"I would do anything for you guys." Carlos said softly.

"I feel the same way!" Logan exclaimed. "Which is why I don't want to risk losing you guys, too. After tonight, I don't think I can stand being apart from eachother."

"Awww, Logie..." Carlos mused. He wrapped an arm around Logan and the other around me. We hugged again for a minute or two until Logan pulled away.

"Okay, we really need to get to bed. Tell you what, if they don't come back on their own, we'll go looking for them tomorrow, okay?" He proposed.

Carlos and I both agreed. "Deal."

Logan nodded. "Okay, get to bed, both of you. Quickly." He turned to Carlos. "And don't you dare come out of that room again for anything until the morning, got it?"

Carlos nodded. "Yes, sir!" He responded with a salute. He turned and quickly ran into his room, said goodnight, and shut the door.

I turned to Logan. "Night, Logan."

"Goodnight, Sammie." He said with a small smile.

I sighed. "I'm really sorry. If I hadn't wanted to go to the Church none of this would've happened and we'd still be sleeping and completely unaware and James and Kendall would still be here and-"

"Hey, hey, hey." He interrupted, placing a hand on my shoulder and cupping

my cheek with the other. "It's okay, Sam. Like you said, we'll get through this. I'm a genius, remember? I'll find a way to fix this." He soothed.

I gave a small chuckle. "Good luck with that."

Logan smiled and hugged me again. "Goodnight, Sammie." He murmured, rubbing my back slightly. I pulled away and walked into my room.

"Goodnight, Logan."

For the longest time I sat there awake in my bed. No one came to check on us. I'm guessing whoever was in the Church either lived somewhere else or just didn't want to make sure we didn't see anything or something like that. I was still petrified, but definetly not as much as I was a couple hours ago. I looked at the clock bext to my bed. 4:21. Ugh, I'm never going to get to sleep. Carlos is probably in his room passed out dreaming about Candyland or some childish place like the kid he really is. Logan might be asleep, dreaming about the night's events. Or he could be lying awake like I am and planning out how he can fix the mess I got us all in. James and Kendall are still gone, as far as I know. I can't even imagine what might be happening to them. It's all because of me. James would have never been caught and I wouldn't be worrying myself to death on where he would be. Is he okay? Did they get out in time? Where was he? Will I ever get to see him again?

Then something hit me: Why am I worrying only about James right now? Shouldn't I be like, hating him? That's how we started out right? He was a jerk to me, so I merely reciprocated the feeling. But then something changed. I'm not sure if it was something I did or said or if it wasn't, but he wasn't as snotty and rude as he first was. It was almost like he was actually trying to like me!

He also said I wasn't annoying him for once. That's a step up.

But something was definetly different with me as well. Why was I so scared when James was caught? Why was I more concerned for his well being over mine? Okay, that really should just be a given, but we hate eachother!

...Don't we?

I mean, I was just trying to be friendly to him and he just automatically hates me because my name reminds him of his bitchy ex-girlfriend. So what? Why should I be nice to him when he won't be nice to me? I bet if it was someone else, like Logan or Carlos, caught in the flashlight's gaze, I would've felt the same way. Yeah, that's it. It's the same feeling for all the other guys. It's nothing different.

You wouldn't have been as scared for them, though.

I hate James.

Do you?

Of course I do.

Then why were you desperate to go after him?

I groaned as I turned in my bed. Just because we hate eachother doesn't mean we're not friends. I mean, I'm sure he would've done the same for me...I hope.

Out of nowhere I heard footsteps down the hall. Right now I think I'm pretty much done with the uncertainty that comes with the random footsteps. There's just too much fear with the thought as to what it might be. And once again I was beyond terrified. I flipped myself over under my sheets so my back was to the door. My breathing became shallower as the footsteps came closer. They weren't as loud as I would have first guessed. It sounded like they were sneaking around. I stopped breathing all together when the knob on my doir started turning. I shut my eyes tight. The door opened and I waited for any sort of contact. I was ready to be ripped out of my bed and tortured or even killed.

Instead, I heard the most relieving sound in the world, a voice.

"Sammie? You awake?"

I sat up and whirled around to face the door. There stood James leaning against the door looking perfectly fine.

"James!" I squealed, reminding myself of Carlos. I jumped out of bed and ran towards James. When we collided together in a hug it was much more meaningful.

You didn't have this with Logan or Carlos.

We held eachother for what seemed like a very long time. I realized how long we stayed like that and I quickly pulled away. "Sorry..." I muttered. He only nodded in response. "Are you okay? What happened? Where were you?" I stood there sputtering out questions like an idiot until James shushed me.

"You still have to be quiet." He told me, there being a soft edge to his voice. "Kendall said someone could still be searching for us. Let's go sit on the bed." He shut the door behind us and led me to the bed.

"Wait, Kendall? He's back too? Is he okay?"

"Yes, Sam. Don't worry, Kendall's fine."

I examined his face again when I thought I saw a scratch. I did. He had a small scratch near his chin. There were two more on his cheek and another on his nose.

"Where'd you get those scratches? James, you told me you were okay!"

"I never said I was okay!" James protested. "But I am..."

"So where'd those scratches come from? What happened? Where'd you go?"

James sighed, and I feared that he might be getting annoyed with me...again.

"Kendall and I escaped into the woods at the bottom of the hill. We maybe ran through half of it before we were sure he hadn't followed us. So my face may have taken a few blows from a couple branches or something. Maybe a couple thorn bushes contributed too..."

"Who was it? In the church, I mean."

James shrugged. "I don't know. I didn't get a good look at him."

"Oh...Well, what about Logan or Carlos? Did you see them yet?"

James nodded. "They're both asleep."

I scoffed. "Lucky..."

James chuckled. "Can you not get to sleep?"

I shook my head and watched the door. "Nope. I'm so shaken up and scared and nervous and-"

"Hey," He whispered. He lighty grasped my chin and turned it towards him. For about the tenth time that night my heart started to beat rapidly.

But I wasn't scared this time.

At least, not in the same way.

"We're safe here, for now. We're not going to let anything happen to you. And I know you'll do the same for us. Nothing can hurt us up here."

I stared into his eyes for a moment. They held the same fear I felt, but there was also reassurance, comfort...and...that's not what I think it is...is it?

We're supposed to hate eachother.

His gaze continued to hold me a little while longer. Even when I started to feel something like a magnetic pull towards him, I didn't look away. Even when we were subconciously leaning closer and closer to eachother, I didn't break his gaze.

But he did.

He suddenly shot up off the bed. The next hing I knew he was by the door again. He cleared his throat before speaking.

"Goodnight, Sam."

I swallowed the large lump in my throat. "Goodnight...James."

Quickly, he opened the door and shut it almost silently.

Oh my God, what just happened?

I steadied my breathing in an attempt to calm my heart. On my brain I had the last few moments on replay. What started it, what happened prior to the event, and why it happened.

...Why did it happen?

I crawled back under the covers of my bed, and for tw next couple hours I was terrified for a whole different reason.

Woah, conflict goin' on there, huh? Well, I was really excited to write this chapter. Consider this like a miracle or something because it came wayyyy earlier than I expected. You have to thank my friends for that though, they're the ones who always push me when I don't want to do something. (There ya go, I mentioned you. Don't get cocky.) Now, it could be a long while before the next one is up, mainly because I have NO idea what I'm gonna do. But usually if I wing it, they turn out to be one of my favorites. So we'll see how that goes! Until then, I wish everyone a great summer an thank you so much for reading, don't forget to review!