Obligatory Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds

Garcia had gone straight for her shower. She didn't realize how tense her muscles were from all this stress and from how she slept on her steering wheel until she got under the massaging shower head Hotch had bought her for Secret Santa last year. She sighed as she toweled off, looking into the mirror to do her make up. There was nothing that wouldn't remind her of him now, he was the love of her life and she had only had him for a day.

She was a little out a sorts still, not quite up for everything with enthusiasm. So, she decided she wasn't super festive today, she would with more muted tones of eye shadow. Same for her clothes, picking out a brown wrap dress with tiny white polka dots and matching modest brown heels.

She decided she knew what she needed when she got into her car, previously clueless as to her destination.

Twenty minutes later she showed up in front of Reid's door. She almost didn't knock, it was seven on a Saturday morning but she heard laughter on the other side and decided it was safe.

"Garcia, come in." Reid was surprised to see her but glad, JJ had said she felt bad for leaving her alone when she had given JJ so much support. "JJ is making waffles. Grab a seat in the kitchen. I gotta get the rascal here to believe I will DVR his cartoons."

She did as he suggested, happy to see JJ elbow deep in flour and singing along with Sinatra.

"You seem better." She could feel a tug at the corner of her lips, noticing JJ sway her hips in tune with the melody.

JJ smiled lightly. "I feel a little more normal today." She put a cup of coffee in front of her friend and whispered. "I even made out a little with Reid this morning."

"Wow. I'm really glad JJ." She was, she didn't expect JJ to have made such strides so soon after last night's incidents.

JJ shrugged. "I had gotten some good news when I checked my voicemail. Turns out my fertility shouldn't be effected after all."

"Oh God JJ!" Pen rose to her feet and wrapped JJ in a big hug, knowing she just got waffle batter on herself. "I am so unbelievably relieved to hear that."

JJ was one big smile like a Cheshire cat, handing Penelope a wet sponge to wipe the batter from her dress. "This emotional high might not last long but I intend to get good use of it. Now, Pen, what brings you here?"

She placed a big plate of waffles on the table and one onto Henry's Spongebob plate as he and Reid joined them at the table.

She accepted the waffle JJ put on her plate. "Actually, I came to talk to Reid."

JJ looked to Reid and he held up a finger as he finished chewing. "Eat your waffle and we will talk after breakfast, ok?"

She nodded and ate half of one of the best waffles she ever had with homemade strawberry syrup.

"Alright. I'll handle clean up, you two talk."

Reid led Garcia to the heated porch and took a seat on the chair across from her on the chaise. "So, you read the letter?"

She nodded. "I need to know—"

Reid held up a hand. "It's true. He's had feelings for you for a long time. Now, I'm not saying he was in love with you when he was in love with Haley because Hotch doesn't do things like that. But he did start feeling for you when they were still married and when he finally moved on from the shock and all, you were with Kevin. And even Hotch doesn't know he said this, but we all know he told Emily he was jealous of Kevin."

"I- really?"

"Yes. Stop worrying about whether he is genuine or not. This is Hotch; do you really think he would just do something like that? He's your hero isn't he?"

She took a moment. He always was her hero. She tried to think of a time Hotch ever lied to her when it wasn't necessary. Lieing about Emily? Had to happen… oh, and he seemed so guilty about it when they were in Dallas. Maybe he was also guilty about—

"Reid!" JJ called frantically, repeating until he and Garcia made it to the kitchen. The container of strawberry syrup dropped and it was pooling out much like blood.

JJ clung to his chest burying her face in one of his characteristic sweat vests. "I can't, it's just too much. I—"

"Shh there JJ. Take a seat and I will clean it alright?" He picked her up after she reluctantly agreed and placed her on the counter since she was barefoot and walking around with broken glass was a bad idea. He made quick work of it and Garcia watched on as he kept peeking smiles at her. When he finished he kissed JJ's nose. "All better."

She buried her face into him, smiling this time in embarrassment. "Sorry I am so crazy Spence. It must make it hard to love me."

He laughed. "You are crazy if you think anything could make me love you less."

Watching that exchange, how they so easily forgave the faults of one another and having gotten confirmation from Reid on the nature of Hotch's feelings she made a quick excuse and bolted out of there.

-Criminal Minds-

Hotch sat apart from the other parents, alone in the auditorium. The spelling bee would begin within the next few minutes and he couldn't help but beat himself up at how his stupid mistake would mean Jack would be heartbroken when Penelope didn't show up. He had tried warning him on the car ride there that she might not come but Jack insisted that she wouldn't do that to him.

It had been a long morning, a long night, a long few days and he wasn't sleeping well. He just kept wishing she was in his arms and according to Jack he wasn't just talking in his sleep, he was yelling.

Being tired does not help the mind cope with grief, and that's what this is, grief over losing something before he really had it to begin with. One day, that's all he got. Twenty three hours and fourteen minutes. That's what he had with her.

He knew he looked horrible; the other parents were avoiding him like a plague. He wasn't sullen or depressed, he was a man beaten. He tried as hard as he could to keep everything from Jack but his son is far too observant. He could see that the muscles in his neck would clench whenever anyone mentioned Aunt Penelope. Jack wasn't stupid. He knew daddy liked Aunt Penny, that daddy would date Aunt Penny if he stopped being a stupid adult who makes more problems than they need. It's not like she pulled his hair or he pushed her… this Jack told him all earlier in the morning.

The kids were coming on stage now and he straightened in his seat, excited to see his son up there and then surprised when he realized Jack was the youngest. The others all appeared to be a couple grades above him. His heart swelled with pride, his son was so smart. Maybe not Reid smart, but advanced none the less.

"Either these kids are on growth hormones or Jack is one smart boy." She whispered it next to him as she took a hurried seat.

He did a double, triple take. She came. Jack would be so happy, he was so happy, but he wasn't going to let himself convince his mind that she was here for him. No, she just wouldn't disappoint Jack. Penelope keeps promises, even if she did break that one where she said she wasn't going anywhere… Jack was up.

"The word is godsend." Mrs. Keller, Jack's teacher and official announcer posed.

Jack spelled it out perfectly and took his seat but not before waving and excitedly say hi to Aunt Penny in the audience which got a good little chuckle. He knew she would be there, now dad knew too.

"Thank you for coming." Hotch figured those were probably the only words she would accept from him.

She simply nodded and kept watching, giving a discreet fist pump when two of the kids were eliminated. He hid his smile, she was competitive and so was he. And Jack wanted to win this so badly.

"The word is omission."

Hotch thought some of these words might be over Jack's head but he never asked for a definition, he just kept spelling out. Soon, it was only him and a girl he knew, the sister of one of Jack's friends, Kevin.

He rose a bit in his seat and he looked for Kevin's parents who held their son between them as they watched on, nervous when they heard the word 'defeated'. Their daughter was indeed defeated when Jack got the word right away after she failed.

Penelope jumped up in unison with him, clapping like a mad cat and actually swinging into a brief and then awkward hug in her excitement. He had to put a hand on her shoulder to bring her back to sitting with him while Jack received his little trophy and the other children got their participation ribbons.

Mrs. Keller walked on stage to present it to him. "To our youngest competitor, congratulations. And now parents, if you would meet us all in the cafeteria we will have light refreshments and you can congratulate all our participants on a job well done."

Penelope filtered out with Hotch and the rest of the parents to the cafeteria, so happy when she saw Jack running with his arms high to Hotch his trophy in hand, being swung into the air by his proud father. He had to kiss his daddy and hang himself out to Penelope for a hug from her. She took him in her arms and pretty much mimicked the same action before she put him down. "How did you spell all that? I can hardly spell half those words."

Jack shrugged. "Daddy always reads grown up books to me too."

She looked to Hotch, yeah he would expand his son's mind beyond the wiggles and all that nonsense. "Well, you are lucky to have such a good daddy."

Jack nodded in agreement. "He's taking me to the zoo and for sushi! You are coming too right?"

"I don't know sweetie, maybe n—" her heart sank, his eyes were filled with disappointment. She took a breath and looked to Hotch.

"Come with us. I checked, the elephants are out since it's been so warm lately." Hotch would thank his son a thousand times if Penelope came with them today.

She took a moment and seeing the hopeful and pleading look on Jack's face agreed. "Oh alright, but promise me you will help me pick out the grossest stuff for daddy to try. Ok?"

Jack laughed and agreed as he took her hand in his. Hotch visibly shuddered at the mention of him having to eat raw quail egg again.

-Criminal Minds-

"Is this right?" Jack was epically failing at using chop sticks. He might be a smart little cutie, but he needs some work on this.

Penelope laughed when Hotch told them how Reid still can't use chopsticks and JJ had to use the rubber band trick when they went to New York on a case. Penelope followed the hint and pulled a clean hair elastic from her purse. After that Jack seemed to get the hang of it and dove into his food, loving everything and picking off of their plates as well.

"He's an adventurous eater for a kid his age, isn't he?" Conversation about Jack was safe.

Hotch nodded. "He just gets really into school. Whenever they tell them about something new he just has to try it. He spent all last month trying to get me to bring him to Boston so he could see where the tea party took place."

Garcia nodded a little, sadly understanding the problem there. "I'll never see that city the same again after Emily."

"Yeah, I hate that. I loved Boston. I spent so much time in all areas of it when I went to Harvard. I especially loved the sports." He hoped that didn't come off as bragging, he was only trying to get at his love for the Boston Red Sox.

She paused. "Is that why you listen to that Neil Diamond song all the time?"

He chuckled. "It seems Sweet Caroline is only really appreciated at Fenway."

She laughed, she never pegged Hotch for a sports fan before, though she doesn't know why. He's an active guy, he coaches Jack's soccer team.

"Daddy." Jack scolded, pointing to his father's plate. "You have to try the ikura with quail egg."

Hotch gave Garcia a dirty look. She knew he had to use all his control to swallow this last time and was taking advantage of the fact they weren't telling Jack about getting sushi without him. But internally he shrugged, there are worse ways to be punished by Penelope Garcia, a total ruin of your credit score comes first to mind.

She knew it was mean but for the first time in a couple days she actually giggled. This was fun, it was fun watching Hotch make that face and seeing Jack so excited to be trying new things.

"When I grow up I am going to go to Japan, and I will eat that fish that is poisonous." Jack proudly proclaimed, putting a fist to his chest in pride and determination.

"Hey, what about me? Don't I get to come?" Penelope asked him, in mock hurt at being left out.

"Silly Aunt Penny, you and daddy will be old." He rolled his eyes, duh.

Now it was Hotch's turn to laugh. She obviously hadn't expected to be called close to old today. "What's next on the list to try Jack?"

Jack consulted his own internal memory banks. "I think Turkish food, no—Aunt Emily told me about a Alger-Algerian place Uncle Rossi took her to."

Pen quirked and eyebrow at Hotch but knew she had no right to ask him if he knew anything on that front yet. "That's cool. I tried learning Arabic once, didn't take well."

"Do you know any words?" Jack was all excitement.

"I remember how to greet someone, and how to say thank you and your welcome; shukran and afwan."

Jack looked to his father, satisfied. "Shukran for sushi Daddy."

Hotch smiled at the sweet manners of his son. "Afwan Jack."

She tried to pay her share of the bill but Jack gave her a death glare talking about how a gentleman pays for a lady and how—she just let him have his way, he was as persistent as his father when it came to these things.

She was starting to feel a little awkward as they walked to the car. Maybe she should just say goodbye here, catch a cab back to the school to grab Esther and go home. The plus of Hotch being Hotch was that he read her discomfort as Jack got into the car. "Listen, I know this is weird for you. If you really need to leave it's alright but I would like you to come with us. You love the zoo, don't you?"

She nodded, a little touched he didn't want her to miss out. "But, is it, for you—I mean with everything-?"

"I'm never anything other than happy with you around." He spoke the truth and got into the car, feeling a little vulnerable at being so open about it.

She sighed and a few seconds later got into the car, wondering just how they were going to break through this barrier she had put up and still didn't seem able to break through on her own. That had to be the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to her and she had nothing she could come up with in return because she had shut those feelings off for days now.

Jack talked to them the whole car ride as he read the brochure for the zoo. He told them everything he knew about each animal that he came across, asking his father questions here and there. It was nice to have the distraction and the simple fun of watching Hotch and Jack interact. Jack really did view his dad like a superhero much like Penelope did. And he worshiped him. His father could never be wrong on anything.

It was such a happy moment for her when Jack asked his father if Henry would have another brother or sister soon.

"Why do you think that buddy?" Hotch asked his son, wondering where this came from.

"Well Adam got a new brother when he got a new daddy."

"Oh, Jack. It doesn't always work that way, it takes a lot to have a baby."

Jack seemed to accept that and turned on his portable DVD player. Once it seemed she was in the clear Penelope looked to Hotch. "You know, JJ got great news. She can still have kids. No side effects."

Hotch blew out a breath he didn't know he was holding. "I can't tell you how happy I am for her, and for you for that matter. You certainly won't be affected if she isn't."

Penelope nodded, she hadn't actually thought about that assurance yet but it did feel good to know the few years she had left on her clock could still be put to use. "She actually made out with Reid."

"Even better. She's starting moving on then. You really helped her a lot you know." He realized they were making real conversation at this point, with a few more minutes left to the zoo.

She nodded. "Reid's a good dad."

He agreed. "He is. Sometimes I forget he's in his thirties and then he mans up and intimidates the gun range attendant. I actually would have laughed aloud had we not needed to find JJ."

She shifted uncomfortably. "Could she have, you know?"

"Hurt herself? I will be honest with you, yes. But you shouldn't blame yourself. You can't be a twenty four hour caretaker and not get stressed." He almost mentioned the letter argument, but decided it wasn't a good idea. She probably still hasn't read it.

She was relieved that the zoo came into sight and got Jack's attention. He kept the adults silent all the way to the ticket booth in his eagerness to determine what order they would see everything.

-Criminal Minds—

Once again, she was forbidden from paying. She shrugged and decided she was going to have to get used to it. Rossi did the same thing and it still made Morgan uncomfortable when she would spot him his movie ticket. Men.

She walked, pretty quietly, with them as they looked at Llamas and zebras, polar bears and the tuxedo children—penguins. She appreciated them, and Jack's enthusiasm but she couldn't say much. Something felt so wrong about this. It was a family moment and she wasn't family even if she would like to be. Why did she have to be such an idiot and take this so poorly? Emily was right, she did undersell her importance to Hotch and she was still a little too sore for the hurt after Carver. Bad timing, like most things in life that go wrong.

Hotch didn't like a subdued Garcia in any state, but especially not when she was supposed to be having fun. Even her outfit wasn't as brandish as he is used to seeing on her though she did look very appropriate to the other woman at the spelling bee. More than a few mothers had complimented her on her dress on their way out. No matter what, he would always find her beautiful.

He tried to gently encourage conversation but she was holding back and he wasn't sure why. He must still be a source of upset for her. It saddened him to think he really did hurt her this way but after Jack whispered a piece of advice in his ear he decided to give one last shot to youthful wisdom.

They came across a pen with horse rides and Jack jumped up and down begging to go on. This time Penelope insisted on buying him the cheap little ticket and she and Hotch watched side by side just outside the Pen as Jack walked around with the trainer to make his selection.

They both had their hands on the top of the metal bars creating the pen and were standing fairly close. Hotch made to scratch his ankle, something which would give him an excuse to change his position and move a little closer to her. Their hands were now just an inch apart. He waved to Jack as he climbed the horse and waited until Penelope's hands seemed to permanently settle before he gently slid his onto hers.

He felt like it was his first time with a girl ever, back in fourth grade when he told his first crush he liked her and she held his hand all day. He was terrified she would pull away from the innocent yet incredibly meaningful gesture.

When she felt his calloused skin on hers electricity rocked through her body. Her eyes almost watered at the knowledge he was still trying with her. "I'm so sorry Hotch. Can you forgive me?"

He looked at her confusion raising his eyebrows toward his hairline. "You don't have anything to apologize for. I am the one who is sorry."

She took his hand between her own and turned her body to him. "No. I took this all out of proportion and with JJ there I didn't get a chance to heal and I am so stupid for not believing you but I never thought a man like you could ever—"

He pulled her to him and enveloped her with pure love in a passionate kiss.

"Go, daddy!" Jack encouraged from his horse. Daddy is finally kissing Aunt Penelope. It's about time.

The both pulled back, a tiny bit embarrassed at the smiles they were attracting from other parents but he still showered her with a few more pecks before Jack got done with his ride.

"Wow, I didn't expect to be this happy today." She teased breathless from their kisses, finally accepting that undeniable passion between them.

"You are making me the happiest man in the world in just talking to me again."

They both broke into large smiles before hugging Jack as he returned to them.

"Alright, how about the elephants now?" Hotch suggested, knowing she loved them more than anything. And he knew for a fact not even Derek knew that about her.

She was visibly excited and grabbed Jack's hand as they walked over, helping Jack balance on the fence so he could watch the baby elephant eat while his parents watched over him protectively. He looked up and he was between his daddy and Aunt Penelope. He tugged on her shirt. "Are you daddy's girlfriend now?"

She looked to Hotch and he took over. "Yeah. Is that ok with you?"

Jack nodded emphatically and turned back to Pen. "Good. Now he can get some."

It was such an innocent statement but it made both their mouths drop. Pen responded first, bending at the knees to lower to his height. "What do you mean?"

He shrugged and looked up at his father confused by their reaction. "I overheard Aunt Jessica and grandma talking. Aunt Jessica said all you need is a girlfriend and to get some. Get some of what daddy?"

Aaron and Penelope shared a look that spoke of pure relief and just a little irritation at Jessica. She looked to answer him, rubbing her hand through his hair. "Silly. Chocolate, of course. Everyone feels better from chocolate."

Aaron nodded, needing a good dose himself. "Yeah, I could really use some chocolate right now. Ice cream? Anyone?"

Jack nodded, his eyes lighting up. Like he would pass up ice cream.

Penelope smiled and spotted a stand. "I know. We have a champion on our hands so he needs something special…space ice cream!"

Jack couldn't have been happier if she told him he was really going into space "Yes!" he yelled at the top of his lungs, running a few feet ahead of Hotch and Garcia towards the Dippin' Dots stand.

Aaron brought their clasped hands up and kissed hers. "Thank you."

She smiled, warmed by their breakthrough of the last fifteen minutes. It just felt so natural to be with him and Jack right now, but she got a little naughty, wanting to make up with him the proper way. She leaned into him just short of where Jack stood ordering his space ice cream.

He barely heard her whisper. "Don't worry, we will both get some of what we really want later."

Aaron couldn't even look at the ice cream flavors, the only thought running through his head being: 'God, she is the perfect woman for me.'