A/N: Hey guys! So I was a bit dissapointed that more people didn't give me their ideas on chapter titles, but hopefully you guys will start doing that? :D The one person who did give me a chapter although was ziva-abby11 with the title She's Always A Woman for chapter four.

Alright well please review with title ideas and I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Oh and this is a flashback chapter, just in case you were confused :)

Chapter Fourteen

Ziva walked down the hall to their apartment slowly, Tony's arm rested protectively around her waist. As she came to stop in front of the door she began fumbling around in her purse for her set of keys and she sighed as they clattered to the floor in front of her. Ziva bent down to pick them up, stood back up and tried to quickly unlock the door, but her grip loosened and they fell from her hand. All her emotions and frustration from the past week seemed to hit her all at once and she didn't know if she wanted to scream or cry.

Apparently it was the latter; tears silently fell down her cheeks as she tried to hold back a sob. She closed her eyes tight; Ziva David didn't cry especially not in front of Tony. She bent down once again to pick up her keys but Tony stopped her, he quietly swiped them off the floor and unlocked the door with ease.

Ziva entered the dark apartment and turned back to him. "It's almost noon, are you hungry for…"

Tony stopped her midsentence, engulfing her in a tight embrace. She stiffened at first, but as he began rubbing soothing circles on her back, she let her walls come crashing down. Ziva sobbed into his chest and she briefly thought that it was a good thing that his shirt was black; otherwise it would have been stained by her mascara. As the tears streamed down her face and the grief overwhelmed her, she barely registered the fact that Tony had picked her up and was carrying her back to their bedroom. He sat her down on the bed but she stood back up, receiving a questioning look in return.

"I-I have t-to get out of th-these clothes." She gestured to her black dress and tights, he nodded in understanding.

He turned her around so he could unzip her dress and she murmured a thank you. She slipped the black garment off and took off her tights. Ziva didn't like wearing black and she didn't understand why Abby enjoyed wearing the color so much. She stiffened, Abby didn't wear black anymore, she used to wear black because now she was dead. Ziva began to sob even harder and when Tony turned back to her after having changed into more comfortable clothes, one of his big OSU t-shirts in hand for her to put on, he looked confused.

"Zee?" He put a hand on her shoulder and she laid her own over it.

"I was j-just thinking ab-about Abby." She hiccupped.

She heard him sigh wearily, then his arms wrapped around her and he rested his head on her shoulder. "I'm sorry Zee. I know she was your best friend."

Ziva took a deep breath and leaned her head against his. "I just don't understand why this happened."

"I don't think we'll ever understand why. Tim and Abbs didn't deserve this." He held the grey t-shirt out in front of her. "Here, thought you'd be more comfortable in this."

"Thanks." She slipped the shirt over her head before laying down.

She laid on her side and when Tony got in be he pulled her to him, resting his arm across her stomach. They laid in silence for a while, it was only noon but they were both exhausted from the days events and Ziva soon fell into a deep, restful sleep.

She woke up a few hours later and turned over to snuggle into her boyfriend but she found his spot empty and cold, meaning that he was up and had been for a while. Confused she got out of bed, glancing at the clock on the nightstand registering that it was five pm. She left the bedroom and walked down the hall to the kitchen; she poked her head in but didn't find him there. Ziva continued down the hall to the living room where she found him pacing back in forth in front of the coffee table.

She leaned against the entryway into the living room. "Tony?"

His head snapped up at the sound of her voice, but this sudden movement interrupted his rhythmic pacing causing him to trip over his own feet and he fell to the floor with a loud thump. Ziva allowed a small laugh to escape her lips as she walked over and sat on the floor against the coffee table where Tony had recovered and was now sitting.

She tried to hide her smile as he threw her a sidelong glance. "Shut up."

"I did not say anything." She turned to him smiling widely and his face broke into a crooked grin.

He placed his hand on the side of her face and gingerly stroked her cheek with his thumb. "It's good to see you smile again."

Ziva closed her eyes and leaned into his touch, but at his words her smile slowly faded away. "I do not feel that it is okay for me to smile."

Tony's hand dropped from her face and she opened her eyes; she was startled by what she saw. His eyes were stony and they stared at the opposite wall with a powerful look of hatred. Every muscle in his body seemed to have tensed up and his fists were clenched beside him on the floor.

"Motek?" She prompted quietly.

Ziva cautiously laid her hand on top of his, stroking her thumb against the taught skin. She had never seen him like this and it scared her. After a few minutes of silence Tony slowly began to relax and the hand she was stroking unclenched.

"I'm sorry." He said quietly, turning back to her. "It's just I get so angry. I've mostly been upset with what has happened but sometimes when I think about what that bastard did to them I just get….mad."

Ziva placed a soft kiss oh his cheek, then leaned her head against his shoulder. She didn't need words to let him know that she was there for him, and she knew what he was feeling. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders in a silent gesture that she interpreted as a thank you. Silence fell between them for a few minutes, until Ziva remembered why she had come to find him in the first place.

"Why were you out her pacing?"

"I woke up and I started thinking about some things and I just needed to get up and walk around the sort things out." Tony explained.

"What were you thinking about?" she asked curiously.

He sighed. "It was nothing."

Ziva turned her head so she could see his eyes; he was lying. "You can't fool me that easy Tony?"

His lips quirked up into a small smile, "How is it that you can always tell when I'm lying."

She gave him a small smile in reply but her face turned serious. "Tony, what were you thinking about?"

He leaned his head against the table and stared up at the ceiling. "I-I think we should leave."

"Leave?" her eyebrows knit together in confusion. "Leave what?"

"NCIS, D.C….everything." Tony whispered.

"What? Why?" She sat up straight, startled at what he was proposing.

"It just doesn't feel right anymore, living and working in the same place and not having McGee and Abby here." He took her hands in his own and looked into her eyes. "Today after the funeral, Gibbs and I, we talked."

"Talked? About what?"

"He told me that he was resigning." Ziva's eyes grew wide. "I know, I didn't expect it either, but then he told me why and I understood. Gibbs is feeling the same way I feel. We both agreed it wouldn't be the same working at NCIS without them. Not to mention how it would feel when they are replaced with meaningless probies."

"But, I still don't understand how you can want to leave. You've lived and worked in this city for five years, and now you just want to pick up everything and leave?" she asked incredulously.

"Yes, I do." He stood up and walked down the hall towards their bedroom. Ziva followed him and entered the room to find him throwing clothes into a duffle bag on the bed.

"Tony? What on earth are you doing?" She exclaimed as he moved back and forth between the closet and the bed.

"I'm packing." He said matter-of-factly. "I thought you agreed with me."

"What? No." She approached him and laid her hands on his arms stopping his flurry of activity. "I asked why you wanted to pick up and leave and you took that as an agreement. The last thing I want to do is leave D.C."

"But Abby and McGee…"He began.

"Abby and McGee are gone and that is absolutely horrible, but I can't leave. This is the first real home, real family I have ever had and I just can't pick up and leave all of that." Ziva interrupted.

Tony's face fell. "But-and as tragic as this is-part of that family is gone now. Gibbs is leaving and from what I've heard Ducky is thinking of doing the same. It's just you and me."

"Tony, I love you," She placed a hand on the side of her face. "but I can't do this."

"Oh." His jaw clenched. "I see."

He walked into the bathroom connected to the room and came back out with his shower stuff and threw it in the duffle bag.

"What-what are you doing?" Her gaze followed him as he grabbed his wallet, watch and cell phone off the top of the dresser across from the bed.

"Leaving." He zipped the bag up and left the room.

Ziva hurried after him. "Leaving? What do you mean?"

He paused in the hallway, "You said you couldn't do this. So I won't make you anymore."

"Did you think I meant 'us'?" She laid a hand on his shoulder. "I love you, Tony. I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

He shook her hand off his shoulder. "If you really meant that you would understand why I have to leave and you would come with me."

Her mouth fell open at his icy comment but she soon recovered. "If I meant anything to you at all you would understand why I can't leave."

"Then I guess we just don't understand each other." She expected him to leave after this but he still stood in the hallway his back to hers.

He wanted her to stop him from leaving, but the damage had already been done and with tears in her eyes she replied without thinking, "I guess so."

Tony continued down the hall and she didn't follow him, but remained standing in the hall alone. The door opened and slammed closed causing her to flinch and her hand went to her mouth as tears began snaking down her face and sobs wracked her body. After about ten minutes of standing in the hallway alone she went back to bed and cried herself to sleep. After weeks of utter bliss and love one man, one tragic accident had gone and undone it all.

A/N: Well happy belated Valentine's Day! Hoped you liked it and please review!