Her Smile Heals Me (part 8)
Santana returned from the restroom to find Brittany sitting quietly at a round table, staring out a plate-glass window. After Santana's father threw them out, the girls walked to a frozen yogurt shop on a nearby main street to regroup. Even though Brittany tried to convince her to just go home with her, Santana felt strongly that going to Brittany's house would just cause more problems.
"What did your mom say?" Santana asked, sitting across the table in a green, metal chair.
Brittany's silent thoughts were interrupted. She looked over at Santana with moisture in her eyes, "What?"
Santana gave her a sad half-smile, "Is your mom picking you up?"
"Yeah," Brittany sniffed slightly, shaking off her emotional moment to be strong for Santana, "I just told her we went to get yogurt. She's almost here."
Santana scooted her chair closer to Brittany and reached under the small table to put a reassuring hand on the blonde's thigh, rubbing it gently.
"I'll be ok, Britt," the brunette told her softly.
"Are you sure," Brittany sounded unconvinced, "You don't even have any clothes or…anything."
"I'll sneak back in tomorrow."
"How…? Your dad took your keys."
"The same way I always sneak out," the Latina said with a proud smirk.
A car pulled into a parking space in front of the small shop, its headlights shining through the window. "There's my mom," Brittany announced, "Promise me you'll call me tonight before you go to sleep?"
"Definitely," Santana smiled upward as Brittany stood and put her backpack over her left shoulder, squeezing her right hand tightly before the tall blonde reluctantly pulled away, "And stop worrying, Britt."
Brittany moved back toward Santana, running a quick caress down the back of her love's raven hair, giving her a weak attempt at a smile before pushing open the door and running out to the passenger's side of her mom's van.
Santana watched the blue Sienna back out of the parking lot and drive away. She took a deep breath and wiped at a sudden tear, the full impact of her banishment washing over her.
"Are you sure you don't want any yogurt, Miss?" the elderly Asian man behind the counter asked her.
"Um…no, thanks," she turned to answer him.
"I can give you a cup for some water," he said sweetly.
"That would be great," Santana stood to approach the counter, taking the clear, plastic cup from him, "Thank you."
She pushed the silver handle to fill her cup with some crushed ice then another handle to add some water. She heard the little bell at the top of the entry door ring out behind her as the door opened again.
"Hello," the elderly owner said, "Can I help you?"
"No, I'm just here to pick up my friend."
Santana turned from the drink fountain. Relieved to see a familiar face, she sighed and said, "Hi."
"Hi," Rachel Berry smiled at the apprehensive teen, "Are you ready to go?"
"Yeah, let me grab my bag." Santana took a long sip of her water, before tossing it in the trash bin, then picked up her backpack, turning toward Rachel.
"Is that all you brought with you?" Rachel asked, slightly confused.
"What you see is all I've got," Santana responded, "I'm pretty hopeless, huh?"
"I'm glad you called, Santana…," Rachel smiled broadly.
"Hello…? Earth to Brittany…," Mrs. Pierce said with a chuckle and a slight nudge to her silent passenger.
Brittany turned away from the window to look at her mom who was driving. "Huh?"
"Do you think I should wear my blue scarf or that new gold necklace with my blazer?" her mother repeated.
"I don't know…both?"
"Oh, honey…I think that would be a bit much, don't you?" Mrs. Pierce continued in her lighthearted conversation, "I'm thinking the scarf…especially if it's windy at night while we're in Chicago…besides your father always compliments me when I wear that scarf…he says it matches my eyes."
Brittany turned back toward the passenger window without commenting.
"Where are you tonight, dear? It's like you're a million miles away."
"I just have a lot on my mind," Brittany told her.
Mrs. Pierce reached over with her right hand to turn off the radio in the van, "Is it anything we can talk about?"
Brittany had always been close to her parents, her mom in particular. The blonde teen was filled with guilt about not being upfront with her own family even though she'd pushed Santana to be more open with hers. That was really bad advice, Britt, she scolded herself.
Brittany was unsure whether her parents truly did not notice her relationship with Santana or if they were simply afraid to ask and confirm it. Either way, it now seemed unfair to Brittany that Santana was forced out of her home while she was still indirectly shielding herself from any family drama.
Seeing an open opportunity, the young blonde decided to take it. "You want me to be happy, right?" Brittany asked, caution creeping into her voice.
"Of course…that's all your father and I have ever wanted for you or your sister," her mom assured her.
"Well…what if me being happy…like truly happy…," she began, but her emotions surfaced unexpectedly, "…meant I needed to tell you something about myself?"
The hundreds of times Brittany practiced this speech in her head over the last year or so did not make this exact moment in time any more manageable. She suddenly had no clue how to say what she'd longed to say, allowing her tears to take control of her as she broke into a sob.
"Brittany, honey…," Mrs. Pierce slowly pulled the car into an empty hardware store parking lot, putting it into park and unbuckling her seatbelt, she leaned over to hug her eldest daughter.
The blonde teen put her arms around her mom, squeezing her tightly, "I love you so much, Mom…and I just don't want to disappoint you."
Her mother pulled back and put her hands on each side of Brittany's face. "Brittany Susan Pierce…I want you to look at me…you are my daughter, and I love you more than my own life…and there is not anything…anything…you can tell me that will ever change that…ok?"
Brittany nodded and wiped at her wet face. Her mother reassuringly rubbed her upper arm.
"Santana and I are more than friends," Brittany revealed nervously, watching her mom closely for any sign of wavering.
Mrs. Pierce smiled lovingly, "I know, sweetie."
"Why didn't you say anything to me?"
"Your father and I felt like you would tell us when you were ready."
"I love her, Mom," Brittany confessed.
"I know you do."
"She's in a lot of trouble."
Mrs. Pierce hugged her daughter again, "Then we'll find a way to help her."
"Sooo…this is my room," Rachel said with a big smile as she spun around proudly, gesturing grandly, "Welcome!"
Santana made a full circle and looked around the brightly decorated bedroom, trying to adjust her eyes to the sensory overload she was experiencing. Rachel's room vastly differed from the Latina's bedroom at her house. Santana had selected black wallpaper and dark furniture with black accessories when her parents allowed her the chance to make over her childhood room two years ago. She considered her bedroom her sanctuary, her cave. Her funky candles and low-lit lamps enhanced the vibe when she needed a toke to escape the reality of Lima, Ohio.
Rachel Berry's bedroom was like nothing Santana had ever seen with its sunshine yellow walls, multi-colored accessories, glossed-white furniture, stuffed animals, and Broadway show posters hanging on every inch of space.
"Wow, Berry…it looks like Broadway threw up in here."
"Oh, well…I do enjoy keeping my eye on my goal."
"You've done things with a glue-gun that I didn't think was humanly possible."
"My motto is: Never miss an opportunity to accessorize!"
"Well…you certainly haven't," Santana said sarcastically.
Rachel grimaced, her enthusiasm draining from her pretty face.
Santana realized she had taken an unfair zing at the shorter brunette who so quickly agreed to help her earlier in the evening, softening to say, "Hey, I'm sorry…it's…um…cheery…like you."
"Thanks!" Rachel's face brightened again, "So, I'll show you the guest room next door…you can make yourself at home in there, ok? Mi casa es su casa!"
There was a knock on the door, and a short, balding man in his middle 40s stuck his head in, "Hey girls…getting settled?"
"Yes, Dad…thanks," Rachel responded, "I was just going to give Santana a quick tour of the upstairs and get her settled in the spare room."
"Great," Rachel's dad said, "Do you need me to help with your suitcase, Santana?"
"Oh…um…Dad...," Rachel leaned toward him to mumble discreetly, discreet being something Rachel Berry was never very good at, "…Santana wasn't able to get any clothes before…her parents…um…."
"Thanks…but…," Santana interrupted Rachel's explanation attempt, "I'm traveling light tonight, Mr. Berry,"
Rachel had previously given her dads the few details she'd gotten from Santana when she asked them if the taller brunette could stay with them for a few days. "No problem…and please call me Daniel, ok?"
"I really appreciate you letting me stay here tonight."
"You're welcomed to stay as long as you want," Daniel assured the troubled teen, pushing up the nosepiece of his black-framed glasses,"…Santana…I don't want to put you on the spot, but…do you have any money?"
Santana blushed in embarrassment, looking down, she answered softly, "No."
Pulling a leather wallet out of the back pocket of his khaki pants, he removed three twenty dollar bills and handed them to Santana, "Here, take this for lunch money…coffee…lip balm…whatever else you need, ok?"
"Mr. Berry…I can't take this…," Santana shook her head.
"Stop…it's Daniel… and consider it a loan then," he smiled, trying to make her feel more at ease, "…you can pay it back whenever you can…no hurry, alright?"
Santana accepted the cash with a timid smile, "Thank you…Daniel."
"No problem at all…now, is there something you can wear for school?"
"I need to do a load of laundry tonight, Santana. If you want, we can toss in your jeans and stuff too so it'll all be clean for tomorrow," Rachel told her.
Daniel Berry unfolded his wallet again and reached his hand back in to pull out a plastic card which he handed to his daughter, "Rachel…weren't you headed to the mall after school tomorrow?"
Rachel took the credit card with a knowing smile, "Yes…there's a big sale going on."
"Well, you girls go see what you can find in the way of summer clothes," he said enthusiastically, "…and I don't want you to return until you both have your hands full of bags, ok?"
Santana was overwhelmed at the unexpected generosity of Rachel and her dads. Not knowing how to react or what to say, tears formed in the corners of her eyes. She looked away for a brief moment to wipe at them, hoping the two Berrys didn't notice. "Thank you…for everything," she said as she turned her head back toward them.
Daniel fully understood the devastation and uncertainty he saw written all over Santana's face. Besides his own coming out story, he knew so many young gays and lesbians who had been rejected by their families because of their sexuality.
There wasn't much he could say or do at this moment to overpower that ache Santana surely was feeling, but he at least wanted her to know she was among people who had walked the same path and who wanted her to feel accepted.
He took a few steps toward her and put his arms around her, squeezing tightly, "Come to me if you need anything…ok?"
Santana nodded and squeezed back. She still wasn't sure what made her call Rachel earlier that night, something in her gut guided her, but standing inside the Berry house, in the most bedazzled bedroom the Latina had ever seen, Santana suddenly felt at home.
Brittany lay in her bed, writing in her journal. She completed the last sentence and replaced the cap on her pen then returned the dried, flattened pink rose inside the pages to mark her place, remembering the night Santana gave her the tiny flower. Fresh tears fell from her blue eyes as her thoughts filled with worry. She wiped her face and set her journal on her nightstand when her cell phone buzzed.
"Santana…," she answered, relieved.
"Hey, love…," the raspy voice said on the other end.
"Are you ok?"
"Surprisingly…yeah…I'm good."
"I'm so glad, honey," Brittany sighed heavily, her worry slowly leaving her body, "Is Rachel there?"
"No, I'm alone…I have my own room and everything."
"That's great," Brittany told her, "…so I'll see you at school tomorrow?"
"Of course," she confirmed, "They've been wonderful to me, Britt…one of her dads even gave me some spending cash."
It made Brittany feel guilty for all the times they had made fun of Rachel. She has such a good heart…Brittany thought to herself, vowing silently to make sure Rachel knew that in the future.
"That's awesome…," the blonde confirmed, "Hey, Santana…can I tell you something without you getting upset?"
"I hate when you ask me that."
"Why?"
"Cause it always means you're getting ready to tell me something upsetting…," Santana retorted.
"Promise me."
Brittany heard a huge sigh on the other end of the phone before she heard, "I promise."
"I told my mom about us tonight."
"Brittany…we agreed."
"No, you agreed…but you promised you wouldn't get upset…anyway, she was totally cool about it."
"Seriously?"
"She sort of said what I hoped she'd say…."
"Which was…?"
"That they already knew."
"And they don't care?"
"Guess not…," Brittany was reserved with the details, not wanting to add salt to Santana's wound.
"That's great for you, Britt," Santana wasn't sure what to feel about that. She paused to think about it, deciding she would rather take the bullet than Brittany, "No, I'm really…really…happy for you, Britt. Your parents have always been so fantastic…so I'm glad they came through for you."
"I told her what happened…she said if you want her to try to talk to your mom then she would."
"No," Santana said abruptly, "I mean, I appreciate it…I do…so thank her…but I don't think it would do any good…at least not right now, ok?"
"I get it, honey…," Brittany assured her, "…you don't have to explain. If you change your mind then just tell me."
"Let's stop talking about all that now, ok?"
"What would you rather talk about?"
"You…and me."
Brittany could practically hear Santana smile through the phone. "That is a much better topic."
"I can't wait to spend time with you this weekend."
"I'm looking forward to it too...," Brittany said with rising excitement, "I'll come by and pick you up Friday night once I drop my parents at the airport."
"Works for me," Santana's mind was already wandering to images of lying in Brittany's arms, "I'm thinking of you right now…your arms around me."
"It's funny cause I can smell you on my comforter, it's like you're here with me."
"I will be soon, love."
"Goodnight, Santana…I love you."
"I love you too, Britt…goodnight."
There was a soft knock on the guest bedroom door as Santana put her cell phone on the bedside table. She stood to open it, finding Rachel Berry on its other side.
"Here are your clothes," the smaller brunette said, handing over a stack of folded garments.
"You didn't have to fold them, Rachel…but thanks," Santana smiled.
"I've always found it best to fold everything right as it comes out of the dryer to ensure fewer wrinkles."
"Gotcha…," Santana stood there, not sure what else to say.
"So the PJs fit, I see," Rachel observed with excitement.
"Um…well, sort of…the pants are a little short," Santana called attention to the hem being above her ankles.
Rachel laughed, "Well…I am petite…as you like to point out."
Santana laughed too, inspecting the arms of the button-up pajama top, "I don't think I've ever worn anything with giant clouds before."
"Well, I thought the clouds were much less ironic than the rainbow ones."
Santana nodded in agreement, "Much less."
"I just opened a new toothbrush…it was a two pack so I'm bringing you the extra," Rachel handed a half-opened plastic package to the taller brunette.
"Thanks."
"There's toothpaste in the top drawer of the vanity," she told her.
"You forget what all you use every day when you're in your own space," the Latina said somberly.
"Well, don't worry…cause you and I will get everything else you need tomorrow, ok?"
"I appreciate it, Rachel…really I do," Santana's feelings of helplessness were close to the surface, and her eyes glossed over with fresh tears.
"Hey, I'm actually really happy to have you here…I get to pretend that I have the sister I always wanted…at least for a few days."
Santana smiled at the sentiment, privately knowing she'd always wanted a sister too.
"I'm going to hug you now…ok?" Rachel smiled broadly.
"Yeah…ok…," the Latina returned the smile, opening her arms to accept the hug.
"Goodnight, Santana…see you in the morning!"
"Goodnight, Rachel…," she told her as she closed the door behind her.
Santana turned around, leaning back against the wooden door. Am I really spending the night at Rachel Berry's house, she thought. She looked back down at the sky blue pajamas with white puffy clouds that were two inches too short at the wrists and the ankles. Yep, I sure am, she snickered to herself.
"I heard a nasty rumor about you this morning…," Kurt said as soon as he sat across the table from Santana in the lunch room.
"That I'm gay?" she responded sarcastically, pouring Italian dressing over her lettuce.
"No, that was obvious months ago, dear…," he retorted while spreading his paper napkin in his lap, "…no…this vicious accusation came from one Finn Hudson…involving the bizarre notion that you are living at the abode of Miss Rachel Berry."
"Living there?" Santana ripped the top off a blue packet of Equal to stir into her cup of iced tea.
"Insane, isn't it?" he chuckled.
"Crazy talk…," she sipped her tea through a clear straw then set it back on her cream-colored tray.
"So it's true…?" Kurt confirmed.
Santana shrugged, "They're letting me stay for a few days is all."
"Well, as generous as that is…that would only happen if you were currently suffering memory loss from a blow to the head…or…you have no other place to go," he observed bluntly, "And…since you are conscious and appear to know who I am at the moment…."
"My parents threw me out, ok?" the brunette said dismissively.
"Which of your many devious activities did they finally catch on to…?" he asked as he took a mouth full of brown rice.
"What even is that?" Santana leaned down to inspect the chicken and rice mixture on his lunch plate.
"It's the special…some teriyaki rice bowl thing…and don't try to distract the topic, Santana."
"They caught me and Brittany together," her frustration rising to the surface, "Not everyone has parents as accepting as yours."
"You're right…I apologize for making light of your situation," Kurt reached across and put his hand over hers, tenderly patting it, "Truce?"
Santana smiled hesitantly at him, "I don't mean to take it out on you…I'm happy for you…and for Brittany…that your parents support you guys unconditionally."
"So why don't you stay with Brittany, if her parents are supportive," he asked.
"They just found out…it needs time to soak in," she told him.
"Why not Quinn then?"
"Her mom is on the Fine Arts committee with my mom…I don't want my whereabouts reported back to her."
"You act as though this is irreparable, Santana…perhaps your parents just need a combination of time and re-education," he smiled supportively.
"My father's professional reputation and status in the community has always been the priority in my family," the Latina set down her black plastic fork and pushed her tray away from her.
"What are you going to do then?"
"Get a job, I guess?"
"Do you want me to see if my dad needs any help at his shop this summer?"
"Isn't it a mechanics shop?"
"Yes…," he smirked.
"Do I look like I'm good with my hands?" the Latina grimaced, holding them both up.
Kurt paused at the question before laughing unintentionally.
Santana broke into a laugh too. "I mean, I've gotten no complaints so far," she playfully slapped across the table at his arm.
"Information that I do not need to know, my dear…," he jokingly held his hand up to stop the topic in its tracks.
"We got The Little Mermaid, Santana!" Brittany's sister excitedly announced as she skipped into the kitchen ahead of the tall blonde.
"Awesome," Santana responded, sprinkling a handful of shredded mozzarella around the circular edge of some light-colored dough, "Do you want to help by setting those plates on the table for us?"
"Sure!" the little blonde enthusiastically agreed.
Brittany moved around the center-island and closer to the brunette, hugging her from behind. As she wrapped her arms tightly around Santana's trim waist, squeezing firmly, she leaned in and kissed her on the cheek.
"So she let you pick, huh?" Santana joked, knowing Brittany's soft spot for Disney movies.
"I had to agree to take her for ice cream on Sunday...," Brittany laughed, unashamed of her selection, "…but it's a fair trade."
"Hand me that bowl of pepperoni please," she pointed to the side counter.
"This looks amazing, Santana," she said, handing her the small bowl with red slices in it, "You didn't have to go to so much trouble though…we could have picked up pizza while we were out."
"No, I wanted to do something special," the brunette assured her, "We used to always make homemade pizza at my house when I was little."
Brittany felt a tug at her heart, hearing Santana mention happier times at the Lopez house, "Yeah, I remember…your mom always made the dough from scratch."
Santana paused, realizing the path the conversation had suddenly taken, "Well, this dough from the market is really good too."
Brittany turned Santana around. Putting her hands on each side of Santana's jaw and pulling her nearer, Brittany kissed her tenderly.
The teens heard giggling behind them followed by, "You two are kissing just like Mommy and Daddy."
They looked over at the little blonde who covered her snaggled-tooth grin with her small hands.
"It's cause you loooove each other," the child said playfully.
"That's right, squirt…jealous?" Santana teased.
"It's better than kissing boys…they're nasty…yuck!"
"Well…I agree with you on that one," Santana winked at Brittany who smiled knowingly.
"Ok, why don't you take these cups to the table…?" Brittany leaned to hand them to her sister.
Santana turned back around to spread the pepperoni over the cheese then picked up the round, silver pan and walked it over to the heated oven, setting the timer for fifteen minutes.
"Oh! I wanted to remember to tell you…I packed you a bag of clothes to take back to Rachel's when you go," Brittany said, "It's basically just casual things…shorts and tanks and stuff."
"Thanks, love…I got this skirt and shirt yesterday at the mall…what do you think?"
"I love it!"
"Rachel tried to 'help me' with my summer look," Santana emphasized with air-quotes, remembering the various pieces of clothing Rachel kept bringing to the changing room for her to try on.
"I'm guessing she didn't select that outfit?" Brittany clarified, noting the light-denim mini-skirt and the low-cut, black, fitted top.
"Um, no….if Rachel dressed me, I would have left the mall with a bag full of plaid and woodland creatures."
Brittany laughed uncontrollably, "I would pay actual money to see you dressed in a shirt with a giant owl on it."
"That wouldn't be funny, Britt…that would just be tragic," Santana shared in the laughter.
"She's asleep…finally," Santana said, stepping back down the stairs into the living room, "Four books later…one of which I had to read three times."
"Ladybug Girl?"
"Yep…," the Latina confirmed, plopping down on the couch above Brittany who was seated on the floor, leaning back against it.
"She adores you, you know?"
"She's a cutie…she reminds me so much of how you were at that age," Santana remembered sweetly, "well…you're still pretty much like that…it's one of your best qualities."
"That I'm like a seven-year-old?" Brittany wasn't quite sure if it was a compliment or not.
"That you have the ability to see past all the shit in the world to find the joy," Santana specified, leaning into the blonde's body, nudging her with her strong shoulder.
Brittany reached up and grabbed behind her to squeeze Santana's shoulders, telling her, "You…are…wonderful."
"I…am…exhausted," the brunette retorted, putting her head on Brittany's shoulder, "The Berrys are a very…animated…group...they talk…and sing…and talk some more…all the fucking time."
"Oh, Santana…be nice!" Brittany playfully swatted at the Latina.
"That wasme being nice," she defended, "I just don't have that much to say."
Brittany lifted her head to kiss Santana's neck softly. She heard a soft moan from the girl above her, and she whispered, "So…just how exhausted are you?"
"Not too exhausted to do this," Santana slid down to the floor and into Brittany's lap, wrapping her legs around the blonde's waist and locking her ankles. She tangled her fingers among Brittany's long locks of hair, pulling her into a deep kiss. The two of them continued their passionate kisses for several minutes, as their tongues dove deep into each other's mouths and their hands moved up and down each other's necks.
Santana reached down and lifted Brittany's t-shirt, tugging up on it.
"Wait…my sister…," Brittany abruptly said.
"She's sound asleep, behind a closed door," Santana assured her, pulling the shirt the rest of the way off and putting her lips back on Brittany's.
Brittany relented to the growing intensity between them, reaching behind her and taking off her own bra then helping Santana remove her shirt and bra. Santana shifted her position to push Brittany onto her back. As the brunette pulled down Brittany's jeans and panties, the blonde lifted her hips off the ground to assist in their removal.
Brittany's skin now exposed, Santana ran her nails down Brittany's sides, leaning lower to run her tongue inside the blonde's ear, pausing to blow hot air before nibbling at its lobe then licking right behind it. This drives her crazy…Santana purred internally, smirking when her action was rewarded with a low moan deep from Brittany's throat. She moved on to a pulse point on Brittany's neck, careful though not to suck too hard…but just hard enough. Santana then sat up, astride Brittany's pelvic bone, to run her hands over Brittany's firm breasts, fondling and stroking them both.
She loved hearing the way Brittany's breath caught in her throat as Santana leaned back down to run her tongue down the center of the blonde's chest and around her nipples, flicking at them before sucking…hard.
Brittany arched her back, reflexively pushing more of her breast into Santana's mouth as she hungrily accepted it. Her fingers weaved through the Latina's long, raven hair as Brittany pressed Santana's head into her chest.
Santana passionately moved between each breast, kneading, pinching and pulling at both nipples as Brittany moaned loudly. The blonde continued to rock and thrust her hips underneath Santana as she sat on top of her, Brittany's warmth and desire growing deep inside.
Santana broke away from the blonde's breasts, finding her way back to her lips and kissing her hard. When the Latina pulled away from her, Brittany held her bottom lip between her teeth, biting hard and smiling when it caught Santana off guard. The brunette paused just long enough to look deep into Brittany's eyes, as the corners of Santana's mouth curled into a sultry smirk.
Almost as if that act required a good-natured punishment, Santana shifted herself and reached down to insert two fingers deep into Brittany, thrusting hard…twice.
"Oh fuck…," Brittany said loudly at the unexpected intrusion.
"That's the idea…," Santana said in a low guttural tone, thrusting her hand harder and deeper, feeling the walls of Brittany's vagina clench tightly around her hand.
Brittany's breathing instantly became sharper and more shallow, "…oh god…harder!"
Santana smiled, squeezing a third finger into the tight space and pumping her hand as hard as Brittany's grasp would allow, curling her fingers upward inside her while rubbing her throbbing clit with her thumb.
When that action was met with Brittany's hips rotating harder against her touch, Santana confirmed, "...faster?"
"Uhuh…," Brittany could hardly think, but she made sure to say, "…don't stop…please."
Brittany's breathing became even heavier as she felt the weight of Santana's body sink into her, allowing her more leverage to carry out the blonde's request.
Santana continued to rubbed Brittany's clit while pumping her hand deep inside her, and it wasn't much longer before she felt the rocking of Brittany's hips halt and her long legs go taut beneath her. Feeling the muscles around her aching hand become even tighter, Santana stopped her movement to let Brittany ride out her orgasm until she finally went limp with satisfaction.
Santana put her head on Brittany's chest and laid still, listening to the blonde's breathing return to normal and allowing her hand to rest inside her. Once Brittany stirred slightly, Santana moved upward to kiss her sweetly as she pulled her fingers out of her.
Brittany whimpered softly, instantly reacting to the void. She wrapped her arms around Santana's bare back, squeezing tightly and savoring the feeling of Santana's exposed skin pressed against her.
"Thank you," Brittany didn't know what else to say to express how much she had needed that release.
Santana chuckled, "You're welcome."
Santana nervously tugged at the lower portion of her sleeveless, white top as she waited for an answer to her knock on the door.
"Good afternoon, Santana…come in…," Dr. Shane said with a smile, opening the door wide for the teenager to enter, "Please have a seat."
Santana stepped over to a brown leather chair and sat down, crossing her legs at the knees and watching her psychiatrist sit in the chair directly across from her.
"How was New York?" the older woman asked, picking up her leather-bound notepad from her side table.
"We lost," Santana stated matter-of-factly.
"Lost?"
"It was the national show choir competition…we finished in twelfth position."
"The twelfth best choir in the nation though…," the doctor complimented, "That's impressive."
"I guess."
Dr. Shane could sense the teen was not interested in discussing that further, "How have you felt now that you're taking the medication?"
"I didn't really feel anything the first couple of days…but I guess it's working…cause I do feel calmer…today anyway."
"It takes a week or so to fully move throughout your system…I'm glad you are starting to feel better though," the therapist advocated, "Is there anything specific you would like to discuss today?"
Santana paused and looked down, unconsciously drumming her fingers on the arm of the oversized chair. "I got thrown out."
"What happened?"
"My father happened."
Santana looked up at the doctor, seeing her brow furrowed in confusion. "He walked in on Brittany and me…together…on the couch."
"I see…," Dr. Shane said without judgment in her voice.
"…not having sex or anything…but it was obvious we weren't studying."
"And so he threw you out?"
"Well, not until my mom showed up and filled him in on the details."
"It sounds like a difficult situation…where are you staying now?"
"With a friend…," Santana said without any of her previous hesitation, "It's working out ok…better than ok, actually."
"That's wonderful, Santana."
"I haven't had to worry about what to say or what to do...or not do...at all the last few days…it's been great."
"Have you given anymore thought to a session with your parents present?"
"Not really."
The therapist pulled a long white envelope from the pocket of her binder. The young Latina instantly recognized the large, ornate handwriting which said "Santana" in bold, black ink. "I spoke to your mother yesterday when I called to confirm our appointment…then I found this under the door when I arrived today."
The two leaned toward each other to exchange the envelope. Santana sat back and looked at it, apprehensively running her index finger along its sharp edge, once then twice, contemplating its contents.
"Would you like a moment to read it?"
Santana paused, unsure of whether she even cared to know what it said, then ultimately relented, "Yes, please." She ran her finger under a small gap in the closure until the seal was completely ripped open. As she unfolded the pink sheet of stationary, a check fell into her lap. She picked it up and inspected it. It was from her mom's personal account, in the amount of $500.
She silently read the letter.
Santana,
I never wanted this to be the outcome. I tried to protect you as long
as I could. We both know your father can be unreasonable at times,
but he does love you. I love you. I want you to know that. You will
always be my daughter, my only child, no matter where you go or
what you do, but I cannot accept your behavior recently. It is not only
embarrassing to your father and me, it is sickening in the eyes of God.
I have prayed long and hard for you to overcome this affliction. I have
gone back over your childhood in my mind, trying to pinpoint where I
went wrong with you that you would conduct yourself like this. I truly
hope that these therapy sessions help you work through your issues.
I want nothing more than for you to get well and come back home. Until
then, your father feels that this is best for us all. I hope this money will
make things easier for you. We will keep it between you and me.
Love,
Mom
Santana refolded the paper, returning it with the check inside the envelope and placing her folded hands delicately in her lap. She thought a moment about the intent behind her mother's message, as misguided as it was, then she took a deep breath, remembering Quinn's words to her on the plane. This is my mother's issue, not mine…I have done nothing wrong, she silently told herself with growing confidence.
She looked up at Dr. Shane who was observing her quietly, telling her cheerfully, "Brittany and I have decided we're moving to New York City after graduation."
"Oh? That sounds exciting," the kindhearted doctor encouraged, "Tell me more about your plans."
"You swear you can't see, right?" Brittany asked, helping Santana balance herself as the teens navigated the last few steps of the Pierce staircase until they reached the top landing.
"No, Britt…I can't see a thing…," the Latina assured her, "…but couldn't you have tied this blindfold on me after we were up the stairs?"
"Oh yeah…I guess that would have made more sense…," the blonde giggled, "…sorry about that."
Brittany turned Santana by the shoulders and pushed her forward several paces then stopped and leaned past her to open a door.
"Mmm…it smells wonderful in here…is this your bedroom?"
"Yes…," Brittany confirmed, pushing Santana forward again until they were both through the doorway, closing the door behind them.
Santana reached to slide off the blindfold, assuming they had arrived at their destination. She felt Brittany's hand slap hers away from her attempt.
"Not yet…," the blonde playfully scolded.
Santana sensed that Brittany was only inches from her, feeling the blonde's hot breath on her cheek replaced by a quick kiss. The next thing she felt was Brittany taking both her hands into her own, curling her long fingers gently around the backs of them. As her palms pressed into Brittany's palms, Santana noticed something subtle…Britt's hands are trembling, she thought.
"I really hope you like this, Santana…cause I worked on it the whole time you were gone this afternoon."
Santana could hear a small tremble in Brittany's voice too. Earlier in the day, she had wondered why the tall blonde had given her a list of errands to run once she finished her therapy session. Brittany had even bowed out of riding along when she asked Santana to drive her sister to the slumber party. It all makes sense now, Santana smiled.
"Ok…here goes…," Brittany reached up and tugged on the scarf that was covering Santana's eyes.
Santana squinted hard, allowing herself to adjust from total darkness, then her eyes fluttered back open. She stood there in silence for what seemed like forever to Brittany before finally saying, "You did all this…for me?"
"Yes…do you like it?" Brittany asked hesitantly followed by a deep intake of air.
"I love it, Britt…I love everything about it," the brunette confirmed softly, emotionally overwhelmed.
Brittany had taken a long, thick piece of packing string and tied it from one end of her bedroom to the other, high above her headboard. She had then draped light-colored sheets over the string to create a tent inside the bedroom then she wrapped everything in white christmas lights, creating a glow throughout the room.
Santana turned and pulled Brittany into a tight embrace. The blonde stepped back and brushed raven hair off Santana's forehead, seeing that her brown eyes were moist with emotion. Brittany moved toward her desk and pushed play on her iPod.
As slow-sung tunes started playing through the white speakers, Brittany stepped back toward the Latina, holding up an outstretched arm, "Will you dance with me, Santana?"
The brunette reached out and put her hand inside Brittany's open palm, smiling up at her as a tear fell.
Brittany pulled Santana toward her, putting her other hand on the small of Santana's back, swaying slowly to the rhythm of the music. The couple danced together through the end of the first song then as the second song started, Santana leaned closer into Brittany, wrapping her arms around her, and lowered her head onto the blonde's prominent shoulder. They moved together in unison until the second song ended then Brittany kissed the top of Santana's head.
"I've wanted to dance with you…for so long now," Brittany confessed meekly.
Santana looked up at her, "I wanted so bad to ask you to dance on prom night."
"I would have said yes…in a heartbeat."
"I know you would have…and then the rest of the night would have been different," the Latina said sadly.
Brittany put a long finger to Santana's lips, "Shhh…that night doesn't exist inside this room."
Santana looked around the bedroom again, "It's magical in here, Brittany."
"Is it how you remembered?"
"…Better."
"Then…do you trust me?"
Santana's voice quivered, "…always."
Brittany smiled and started unbuttoning Santana's white top. The brunette could see Brittany's fingers shaking as she undid each of the tiny buttons…almost as much as Santana remembered them shaking the first time they removed each other's Cheerios uniforms to climb into bed together.
Santana helped her by sliding the top off and dropping it to the side then sliding off her bra once Brittany unhooked the back. The Latina did the same for the blonde.
Brittany consciously left on her and Santana's jeans, leading Santana over to the bed. Careful not to brush against any of the lit candles, Brittany pulled back part of the draped sheet and tucked it behind her headboard, creating an opening to the bed.
Santana smiled when she saw the lights were strung inside the fabric nook too. Once Brittany lowered herself onto the mattress, Santana settled on top of her, laying her head on Brittany's chest. She listened to the sound of Brittany's heartbeat and the rhythm of her breathing, trying to free her mind of the destructive thoughts that were never very far below the surface.
Brittany lay silently beneath her and held her, enjoying the softness of Santana's skin as the blonde gently rubbed her. After several calming minutes, Santana rolled off of Brittany and onto her back, pulling the blonde with her until their positions were switched.
The music played softly in the background, and Santana noted several of her personal favorites, knowing Brittany must have made a special playlist for the occasion. She smiled up at the blonde and pulled her head down to kiss her.
As they kissed, Brittany tenderly rubbed Santana along her arm and down her side. Feeling more confident that things were going well, Brittany massaged the side of Santana's breast, brushing her fingertips lightly over the mound of flesh, instantly feeling how her nipple hardened and the darker skin around it wrinkled. The blonde lowered her head and licked at them with her tongue, hearing soft moans escape from the brunette below her. Incited, Brittany started gently sucking, first on the left nipple then shifting to suck Santana's right.
Santana felt heat start building deep inside her groin, but instead of fighting against it as she had done recently, she allowed herself to enjoy it, pulling Brittany into another passionate kiss.
The blonde continued to manipulate Santana's ample breasts as they kissed, finding herself pausing slightly as the Latina dragged her fingernails across the flesh of Brittany's shoulders. She squeezed the dark nipples harder, causing Santana to moan loudly and scratch harder and downward until Brittany felt the brunette's hands slip under the waistband of her jeans to grab at both of Brittany's butt cheeks.
"Do you want me to take these off?" Brittany asked, trying to stay in check with Santana's mental state.
"Yes…," the brunette told her without hesitation.
Brittany rose up onto her knees and unbuttoned her jeans, pulling them, along with her underwear, over her narrow hips and down her long legs and bending skillfully to pull them off her ankles. She then smiled at Santana as she reached out to drop them over the side of the bed.
Santana looked at her love in the glow of all the white lights, seeing the same sparkle in her blue eyes that was there when they were thirteen, marveling at how Brittany had become even more beautiful at seventeen.
"Help me too?" the brunette requested sweetly.
Brittany smiled again and unzipped Santana's jeans, removing them slowly then tossing them on the floor with hers. She kneeled on the bed between Santana's legs and waited for her next cue.
"These too…," Santana started tugging on her black, lacey panties, lifting her hips as Brittany pulled them the rest of the way down and off.
Brittany moved back over Santana and rubbed her abdomen, running a firm touch over its taut muscles and outlining her navel. She locked eyes with the Latina before moving her hand down over her mound, caressing her gently.
As she circled, Brittany allowed her hand to travel a little lower each time, eventually reaching wetness that was collecting on the line of hair which covered Santana's folds.
Santana felt herself becoming wetter and wetter as Brittany's fingers came closer to her core, silently urging herself to push away the images that flashed inside her head, wanting so much to just give herself over to the sensation of Brittany's touch.
Brittany broke their kiss and looked deep into Santana's eyes. Santana nodded, so subtly in fact that Brittany was almost unsure she did…so the blonde asked, "Yes?"
Santana moved her own hand down over the top of Brittany's and guided the blonde's hand into her folds. Brittany began to rub Santana as gently as she had ever touched anything. She could feel that the brunette's clit was enlarged and pulsating so she was encouraged that Santana was truly finding this pleasurable and not just relenting to the act in order to appease Brittany.
The blonde continued to gently move her long fingers up and down the length of Santana's vulva then began focusing a steady touch on her clit. Santana moaned loudly and began to rotate her hips, pulling Brittany closer by her shoulders.
Brittany moved up a little more to lay her cheek against Santana's, listening to her shallow breathing and her growing moans. It wasn't long before Santana tightened her arms around Brittany and went stiff beneath her as her orgasm washed over her.
When the Latina stilled, Brittany went to remove her hand, but Santana stopped her.
"Again…," she told Brittany, her voice cracking, "Inside me this time."
Brittany asked cautiously, "Are you sure?"
"I can do this," she responded, tears falling from her eyes.
Brittany's emotions rose to the surface too, her eyes glossing over. She leaned down to whisper directly into Santana's ear, "I love you, Santana…I want you to know how beautiful and how brave you are…I love you so much."
As Brittany spoke softly to her love, she pushed her middle finger inside her, feeling Santana reflexively jump at the sensation and pull Brittany closer. The blonde continued to assure Santana how much she loved and adored her as she added her index finger then began sliding the two fingers in and out of her.
Santana focused on the sound of Brittany's voice, so soft and sweet, whispering the most loving things she'd ever had anyone say to her. She felt the heat in her groin rise again as Brittany rubbed her still-throbbing clit, and it wasn't but another minute before a second explosion of electricity shot back through her, her muscles quivering under the wave of another orgasm.
Physically and emotionally overwhelmed, Santana broke into a sob. Brittany pulled out of her and wrapped her long arms around the brunette in a tight embrace, crying with her.
Once Brittany heard Santana calm, she kissed her on the forehead then wiped at her wet cheeks with her free hand then kissed the end of her nose, lastly kissing her softly on the lips.
"You did it…," Brittany said with a supportive smile.
Santana couldn't help but lightly laugh at the blonde's innocence and unwavering compassion, "Yay me."
"Yay you…," Brittany smiled bigger.
"Yay us…," Santana added, raising her head to kiss Brittany on the lips.
Author's note: This last scene was a long one! Whew. I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter. It wasn't until I finished it that I realized it is sans Quinn. Sorry about that. Perhaps this is when Quinn is off dying her hair pink and joining an all-girl rock band. Guess we'll find out in Chapter 9. Stay tuned…