Okay, I'd just like to say that there is A TON of steamy smuttiness in this chapter. I absolutely had a ball writing it, and I hope you guys like it!
By the way, I'm not really sure why I feel the need to add this, but I realize that in the show the kitchen is directly connected to the living room, as in they're basically the same room. It worked a little better in this fic for them to be separate rooms, so sorry if that totally ruins my story for you. :'[ Lmao I'm obviously kidding, I just felt like I needed to clarify?
And just so you know, I know EXACTLY where I'm going with this. I'm really excited to write the next chapter because a lot is going to happen. But a lot happens in this one too, so yeah!
Anyways! Please R&R. Reviews make me really happy, and realllly motivated. ^_^ Here we go:
Kendall and James weren't boyfriends, but they might as well have been. They were inseperable and Kendall was absolutely always there when James felt unbeautiful, when he was lonely, when he got so stressed that he felt like he just couldn't take it anymore. James couldn't have been more grateful. The only issue he had with any of it was when Kendall made him promise that if he really felt like purging he would come to Kendall with it, so they could make it through the moment together, and hopefully convince James otherwise. To James, this just meant he had to be extra sneaky about throwing up. He wasn't trying to hurt Kendall, he really wasn't. The soul purpose of his purging was to prevent him from gaining weight, to prevent Kendall from leaving.
It was basically understood that the two definitely had a thing. None of the four guys had talked about it at all, but James and Kendall knew that Logan and Carlos knew. Somehow it wasn't awkward at all, it was just naturally comfortable.
One particular evening about a week after the whole argument in the studio in which Kendall bitched out Gustavo, all the guys could tell by James' mannerisms and body language that there was something wrong. Sure, he hadn't been himself for a while now, but this just wasn't right.
Kendall hadn't left James' side all day, but the obviously upset brunette didn't even smile when Kendall rubbed his back gently and whispered soothing, affectionate words in his ear.
When Logan and Carlos, and then finally Kendall, settled into the couch to watch HBO, James stayed planted to the chair he was sitting in in the kitchen.
"You wanna come with us?" Kendall asked while running a gentle hand through James' hair. James shook his head and sat completely still. He absolutely adored the attention, but he still wanted to be alone.
"Okay," Kendall gave up finally, not wanting to bother James. "Come get me if you need anything, okay babe?" he leaned down and whispered in James' ear.
There it was, the adrenaline rush that Kendall always managed to give him. James nodded and watched Kendall leave.
The instant everyone was out of the room James bolted up from where he was sitting and rushed to the cupboards, pulling them open and loading up his arms with anything he could grab. He rushed down the hall with everything he'd gathered and dumped it all on his bed when he reached his room. James hurriedly shut and locked the door and collapsed on his bed.
Within seconds James was ripping open boxes of oreos and stuffing in his mouth as many as he could fit. He had a system. First he ate the foods that took more chewing, and when he began to slow down he would start in on the Hostess snacks and Nutella and marshmallow fluff.
When James' cheeks hurt from chewing and he was so bloated that he could barely move, he hurried to the bathroom and grabbed a toothbrush.
Ever since Kendall had found him slumped over the toilet and bloody, James was being extra careful. No matter how much he hated hurting Kendall, he couldn't allow himself to gain weight. He just couldn't. As far as James knew, Kendall had no idea that he had been purging all of the past week. And he planned on keeping it that way.
James tiptoed back into his and Kendall's room when he was finished and gathered up the remnants of what he'd been eating. He slowly made his way into the kitchen, the room directly adjacent to the living room where the guys were hanging out. Judging by the laughter and loud clattering and banging, they had clearly forgotten about the television... and were oblivious to anything else going on in the apartment. Katie and Mrs. Knight apparently were too: the sound of Katie's high-pitched cheers for Kendall to win the living room wrestling match were ringing through the kitchen.
Mrs. Knight was on the phone down the hall, gossiping about how Ron was being so unfair to Katherine and that if he was going to act like that, Katherine may as well divorce him. Women.
When James finished putting away all the snack food, he considered joining the guys in the next room, but quickly decided against it. James knew he wouldn't be much fun that night and the last thing he wanted to do was worry Kendall and ruin all the fun for him.
James walked down the hall and into the bathroom, stripping down and jumping in the shower. Soaping up, he couldn't deny that in the past three months he'd lost a whole lot of muscle tone. That used to be James' thing, being the athletic looking stud. Now it was just all about being thin.
James retired to his shared room wrapped in a towel and slipped into some boxer briefs, daring to look in the mirror above the dresser. He actually didn't look so bad: after ridding his stomach of all he'd eaten, his belly wasn't bloated and actually kind of looked small. James smiled. He collapsed onto his bed in just the undies and curled up on his side.
The bedroom door opened suddenly, startling James. He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw that it was only Kendall, but tensed up again in seconds at the realization that Kendall was seeing him in his underwear... especially since his ass was facing the door.
"Oh, I'm sorry!" Kendall exclaimed. He turned around and covered his eyes. James smiled at how understanding Kendall was being. He grabbed a hoodie and a pair of sweatpants from the dresser, put them both on and sat back on his bed.
"You can look now," James said. His crush slowly turned around and uncovered his face, revealing a contagious grin.
"What?" James demanded.
"You! You look amazing. Your ass... holy fuck. Oh wow, I shouldn't have said that. I'm sorry. I just really thought you should know how perfect you are."
"Thanks," James said quietly as his face turned tomato red.
Kendall laughed lightly and sat next to James on the bed. "You mind if I sleep in here tonight?"
"Do it." James and Kendall crawled under the covers and Kendall coaxed the brunette to lay over him.
"Hi," Kendall said sweetly, looking at James and fuck, Kendall just looked so gorgeous. In that moment James decided that he was going to put aside his stupid insecurities, even just for that night. He leaned forward and pressed his lips against Kendall's, automatically feeling a rush of excitement, adrenaline, and nerves. There was such a heat between the two and Kendall's hands were all over James' back and tangled in his hair.
Gaining some confidence, James bit Kendall's lip, tugging on it as he pulled away. Kendall let out a shaky whine that excited James beyond belief. Still, Kendall was being respectful and keeping it clean... James could definitely change that.
Kendall put a hand on the back of James' neck and pulled him in for another heated kiss. James cautiously rested his hands on Kendall's chest, inching downward until he was at the hem of Kendall's shirt. His fingers danced over the blond's hips and belly, delighting in the feeling of a faint happy trail.
Kendall's breaths were becoming more shallow and soon James had the shirt all the way up and was pulling it over Kendall's shoulders and head.
James lowered his face and began kissing the skin of Kendall's collar bones. He moved down to a nipple and lightly nipped at it before biting down and tugging a bit.
"Fuck," Kendall hissed. The blond was hard now, James could feel Kendall's length pushing up into his groin. James loved seeing Kendall like this, watching the blond come apart in his arms. James crawled further up and rested his knees on either side of Kendall, straddling the narrow hips and grinding down with an innocent smile on his face. Kendall's head fell back and he let out a low moan. James grinned and Kendall peeked up sheepishly.
"Sorry," he panted. "J-Just really fucking..."
"Hard?" James gave a cocky smile and rolled his hips against Kendall's.
"Yes," the blond gasped, both in answer to James' question and in reaction to the sudden friction. James tugged off his own hoodie and stared into a pair of lust-clouded eyes.
"J-James," Kendall gripped James' hips. "Are you sure about this?" The brunette leaned down, his hot breath against Kendall's mouth.
"I'm sure," he whispered. As soon as the words left James' mouth, Kendall was pulling him in for a rough kiss.
"What do you want me to do?" James asked, his voice low and determined. Kendall gripped James' ass and pulled him down against his groin, rolling his hips up and breathing out a desperate moan.
"Wanna see your ass," Kendall told James, still gripping the boy's hips. James smiled devilishly. He climbed off Kendall's lap and slipped out of the sweatpants he was wearing. He straddled Kendall again, this time with his back to the blond.
"Oh my fucking God, James," Kendall gasped. He was hypnotized by James' perfect little ass and the way his black boxer briefs stretched so perfectly over it. "So fucking gorgeous."
James was surprised by how much he enjoyed seducing Kendall. He felt confident for the first time in what seemed like forever. Being with Kendall just felt right, and James was hardly even nervous anymore; just horny, his hard-on straining against the fabric of his underwear.
Kendall gripped James' cheeks and James whimpered, leaning forward and arching his back.
"Bend over," Kendall growled. The brunette obediently bent forward onto his hands and knees and Kendall pulled his legs out from under him.
Kendall shimmied out of his jeans and boxers and got on his knees behind James, gripping his hips and grinding his throbbing length against the boy's ass. James moaned at the sensation and his hand went straight to his cock.
"Shit, James," Kendall breathed, running his hands along the feminine curves of James' hips and ass. He slipped his fingers under the waistband of the boy's boxer briefs and waited for an objection. When it never came, Kendall tugged them down and took in the sight of James bent over naked for him.
Kendall reached for his cock and immediately began running his hand up and down the length and thumbing the slit.
"Kendall," James whined, trying to push back into Kendall, craving the feeling of the blond's hardened cock against his ass.
"Want me to make you feel really good, Jamie?" Kendall murmured, bringing a hand down to lightly slap James' ass.
"Fuck yes," James moaned.
"I'm gonna make this feel so fucking good, baby. I promise." Kendall bent down to get a better view and groaned at the sight of James' backside, completely bare in front of him. He bent lower and licked a slow line from James' balls and all the way up until he reached the brunette's lower back.
"Kendall," James shuddered. Kendall's dick throbbed at James' reaction and his mouth was immediately back on James, licking lightly before putting a bit of pressure on his entrance. The brunete whined in pleasure and it had to be the hottest thing Kendall had ever heard.
"So fucking beautiful," Kendall murmured and dipped his tongue into James' entrance. James was panting now, reaching back and gripping Kendall's neck, grinding back into his mouth. Kendall reached around in front of James and put his hand around the brunette's pulsing cock. He ran his thumb across the head and smeared around the precum.
"Kendall, I'm so c-close..." James told the blond, who quickly picked up his pace of stroking James' jock and applied more pressure with his tongue. James' mewling and whimpering became louder and he pushed his ass back into Kendall even further. The movements of Kendall's tongue, skillful and flickering, were quickly sending the other boy over the edge. Kendall continued jacking James off, flicking his wrist as he got to the tip, and James moaned loudly as he released into Kendall's hand.
The blond continued stroking until the very last drop and waited for James to come down from his high, then lovingly kissing up James' back until he got to his mouth.
"No," James protested, "Not until you brush your teeth!" Kendall laughed and stood, grabbing the towel from James' shower that had been discarded on the floor earlier and wiping his hands off. Both boys slowly got dressed and Kendall slipped into the bathroom to brush his teeth.
James' eyes widened and he yelled from his spot on the bed, "Kendall!"
"Yeah?" Kendall asked, alarmed, as he came back into the bedroom.
"I didn't help you finish," James blushed. "I'm so sorry, if you want me to right now, you can do whatever you want to me, and I..."
"Baby." Kendall put both hands on James' shoulders. "You letting me worship your ass was more than enough. Don't ever worry about something like that again, okay?"
James nodded, just as Carlos pushed the door open without knocking and came right into the bedroom.
"Hey James, are you feeling better?" he asked, frowning.
"What do you mean?" James responded a little too quickly.
"I mean, I've heard you throwing up like every day this week, and you just did an hour ago. Man, what an awful stomach flu." Carlos shook his head and gave James a sympathetic but sad smile. Both James and Kendall froze and an uncomfortable silence set in.
"Yeah, James," Kendall cocked his head, his voice the coldest the brunette had ever heard it. "You feeling any better?"
"Y-Yeah, thanks guys," James whispered. Carlos looked incredibly confused, but nodded and started for the door.
"Okay, buddy. Goodnight."
The second the door closed Kendall went over to his bed and grabbed a pillow and a blanket. His jaw set, so fucking pissed that he couldn't trust himself look at James, he headed toward the door too.
"Kendall," James cried desperately, jumping up and grabbing the blond's wrist. "Wait, I..."
"I can't believe you just let me do that," Kendall said, voice low, his green eyes blazing with rage. "You let me have that moment with you, that, that... closeness... I have never felt so connected with someone in my life, James. And you've been pulling the wool over my eyes all week?"
"If you'd just let me explain-" James said, helpless.
"No. You obviously care more about your looks than our relationship," Kendall spat.
"Our relationship?" For a moment James' heart swelled with joy. Our relationship.
"Yes," the blond nodded slowly and sardonically. "Now please, just leave me alone. I need some time to think."
James stood, numb, as the most important person in his life left and shut the door loudly behind him.