Disclaimer: If I owned this I would be God and a super millionaire producer.
A/N: Thanks to all my reviewers, for some reason I can't review reply so PMs for now will have to do, Diana I love your reviews and want to reply to you but the site says you don't accept PMs so. Unnamed visitor thanks so much I am glad you are getting hooked on this new couple. You will get to see more of POB/Mary don't worry, and surprise, surprise for fans of these two couples there will be a major twist to this story in this chap!
Don't miss a thing!
There will constantly be switching POVs here especially when Eustace is remembering stuff from his past be that with Mary, Bess or his son.
Song recommended for this chapter: All the right moves by One Republic
And don't forget to R/R!
~VXLP
"It is going to be him or me, that is how it will all go down. Either he dies and I dance over his tomb, or he kills me first. I do not know what will happen first.
He kills me or I kill me. But I know one thing, neither of us will rest until the other is finished.
He is my nemesis, he made sure I was risen to the top of the mountain and then he abandoned me.
Left me for dead. Is this how he repaid all the attentions I gave him? All the love that he received only from me?
I can forgive any injure, anything that comes to my way I can easily forgive. But I cannot forget.
There is regret flowing through my veins and that regret motivates me to seek revenge for what what he's done.
See me, see me for what I really am"
~"Lady Justice" by Anonymous
1534, July 10th
Greenwich Palace: Eustace Chapuys' bedchamber
They had been talking about the first time they became closer, when Elizabeth had nearly caught him crying over Mary. To this day he denied he had ever cried, but she had fun reminding him. It no longer hurt to speak of it, he even added the parts she missed from their memory.
"Let yourself go, forget her Eustace, forget her and remember me" She said in a half pleading, half commanding tone.
Turn back the clock he pleaded to his Lord and savior, Jesus Christ. Turn back the clock and give me a new chance with Mary, so our love could be renewed. Elizabeth he was being witness of her kindness, but also of her powers to convince and to love with greater passion than her sister or her mother for that matter. But, the words that came from this young Goddess' mouth were true, then Eustace had more reason to beg to God to make this moment disappear, for the young Royal did not deserve disappointment like the many she had suffered under her father's cruel iron fist. She was so much better, though not as much as her sister, than him.
A woman Eustace, he thought, a young woman, this will pass, she will forget you just like Mary.
Mary ... the memory still lingered causing him to nearly fall, and clutch his chest in pain. He had kissed Mary, he had declared his love in every sense of the word to her, and yet she had left him, she had hurt him. And Elizabeth? Did she deserved this? No.
"Elizabeth I don´t want to...hurt you. There is little difference between you and your sister in terms of rank -you both are out of my reach. And I will hurt you, first because I am a wounded man already because of your sister
"It doesn't have to be that way, I am not my sister Eustace, I know what I am bargaining for, and I am willing to accept the consequences, I can take care of myself and you"
"I am twenty six years older than you, I am a year older than the King, old enough to be your father!"
"What does that mean?" She asked feeling hurt pulling away from him in hurt and confusion.
~o~
Eustace had remained silent during their lovemaking, she had asked him the same question she had months previous to Mary's wedding. "What does that mean?" She asked once more. Back then he had answered with more confusion as the troubled look on her face, that he did not know if it was wise for a woman of noble and royal lineage like her to fall for an old man like him, who could barely call himself noble. They had withstand many trials together and as Mary's pregnancy advanced so did his relationship with Bess. She was an incredible woman capable of incredible things.
He smirked at her puzzled face. "Means that we will not let anything disrupt the peaceful moments we have together" He said wanting to tell her more, he wanted to say to her I love you and I want to spend the rest of our lives together.
There were many more things he should say to her now, before they were discovered –IF –his mind rephrased- they were ever discovered. But such declarations were dangerous, Elizabeth deserved the love of a Duke, a Prince, a Count not a poor Ambassador like him. He did not have the noble blood that half her family did through their royal connection to the Plantagenet king Edward III. She had nobler blood than her brother. There was no way they could be together, she was just so beneath her in every way.
But he couldn't walk away from her either. There was something very powerful about this girl a deadly combination of her father Henry VIII and her mother, Anne Boleyn. And then there was her.
She was however kinder, fairer, and her eyes –they were so blue –bluer than Mary's which were more grey like her father's.
Oddly enough after this comparison and contrast unknown that this lady had thought the same about her mother and sister, Eustace had found that Mary shared more in comparison to Anne Boleyn. Mary was far more ambitious and she could hardly control her temper like her mother's rival.
"You are staring at me Excellency" She whispered
"Yes..."
Elizabeth got him closer to her chest. Eustace pulled the covers closer to their bodies before Fleming had come running like a madman into their chambers. He had stopped thinking of his chambers as only 'his', Elizabeth spent so much time here that it became like her second home.
He sighed going back to the first time he had yearned to have her in his arms. He had been so scared then. He had recently had his heart broken with Mary, he was afraid that Elizabeth being the harlot's daughter, she would hurt him worse.
~o~
(Eustace POV)
I sighed wanting to take her back into my arms, but I had to stand firm with what I said.
I gazed directly at her, I had to wait more than a minute or so before I could speak being lost in those dark hooks of her, no wonder I thought that Mary, Henry, and all these Royal including Anne Boleyn, with those eyes of theirs were able to trap any woman or in my case any man.
"Elizabeth you will forget me, and even if you don't your father will disapprove, your sister will gain more advantage against you, you both love each other, and I don't want my person being what separates you, furthermore I am ... I am..."
She finished the sentence for me.
"Old? You think I am that shallow and hollow in spirit sir like my mother, or as ambitious like my sister? I am Elizabeth, not Anne, not Mary and certainly NOT my father"
"Elizabeth" she repeated, not finished "and I get what I want, and I want you, just as I know you are having new feelings for ME. Forget her Eustace, don't you see that the only reason why you are staying in this country you clearly hate is for her, a woman who has stepped over you, who has not acknowledged your love, did she say I love you, Eustace what proof did you ever have she loved you!"
"She said it!" I yelled being let out of control from her outburst. How dare she speak that way against Mary? How well did she know her?
"What?"
"You know nothing of us" He yelled "Nothing don´t presume, don´t you..." -he trailed off not going further
"You and Mary had...something?" Elizabeth asked feeling astonished. And hurt. And jealous
"Did you know" I turned back at her, not able to contain myself any longer. I added more of our darkest secrets "She told me a month ago that she loved me, that I was the only man she knew, that she knew no other man but me!"
Elizabeth couldn't contain her anger for her sister and her frustration at Chapuys for being SO NAIVE! She revealed everything to him, everything that would hurt him and haunt him for all eternity and never forgive Mary for that.
"She does not! And you are so naive!" she could taste the salty tears.
"What do you mean?" I demanded.
Elizabeth let out a maddening laughter "Mary humiliated you! You must be very angry at yourself. You never lose control, except with Mary don't you? Oh but Eustace enough blaming yourself! Before she slept with you, she slept with Philip, why do you think they married so quickly? Not because she slept with Philip, but because she is carrying a child, and all those times that she said I love you, she must have known Eustace what she carried ... I am so sorry"
~o~
It is ironic –he thought –how things turned out in the end. That is when he had felt all the air being swept from his lungs, the air become denser and a knot forming around in his throat that made it impossible for him to speak. Her words hurt him more than any other's but they had taken the veil from his eyes about Mary and everything else in the English Court. That he had learnt all of this from an almost eighteen year old looked foolish on his part but Elizabeth was not like any other girl or woman he met before. She had the wisdom of an owl and the ingenuity of a fox.
There was no greater foe to be reckon with, Elizabeth joked that was because she was born from a tornado and a volcano. The volcano being her mother and the tornado her father because she considered only he could swept tears of joy and happiness and replaced them with wreckage.
Elizabeth had known more pain and conflict in her short life than Mary ever did. And Eustace was grateful for once to have chosen a Tudor woman as his lover. He was convinced that Mary was a mistake, a very grave mistake. It was not meant to be. With Elizabeth he could still have a chance of being happy, and he vowed that if by some miracle they came to be together, he would make Elizabeth the happiest of all wives. He would have no eyes for any other woman but his Elizabeth.
His Elizabeth, his mind whispered. God, he never imagined he would fall in love with the heretic's daughter. Everything was so twisted now, how had they wound up like this? Two unlikely people –so in love- how?
All the right friends in all the wrong places
So yeah, we're going down
They've got all the right moves in all the right faces
So yeah, we're going down
Just paint the picture of a perfect place
They've got it better than what anyone's told you
They'll be the King of Hearts, and you're the Queen of Spades
And we'll fight for you like we were your soldiers
I know we've got it good
But they've got it made
And the grass is getting greener each day
I know things are looking up
But soon they'll take us down
before anybody's knowing our name.
They've got all the right friends in all the right places
So yeah, we're going down
We've got all the right moves and all the wrong faces
So yeah, we're going down
They said, everybody knows, everybody knows where we're going
Yeah, we're going down
They said, everybody knows, everybody knows where we're going
Yeah, we're going down
Do you think I'm special?
Do you think I'm nice?
Am I bright enough to shine in your spaces?
Between the noise you hear
And the sound you like
Are we just sinking in an ocean of faces?
It can be possible that rain can fall,
Only when it's over our heads
The sun is shining everyday, but it's far away
Over the world is death.
They've got,
They've got all the right friends in all the wrong places
So yeah, we're going down
We've got all the right moves and and all the wrong faces
So yeah, we're going down
They said, everybody knows, everybody knows where we're going
Yeah, we're going down
They said, everybody knows, everybody knows where we're going
Yeah, we're going down
It doesn't matter what you see.
I know i could never be
Someone that looks like you.
It doesn't matter what you say
I know i could never face
someone that could sound like you.
All the right friends in all the wrong places
So yeah, we're going down
We've got all the right moves and all the wrong faces
So yeah, we're going down
All the right friends in all the wrong places
So yeah, we're going down
We've got all the right moves and all the wrong faces
So yeah, we're going down
They said, everybody knows everybody knows where we're going
Yeah we're going down
They said, everybody knows everybody knows where we're going
Yeah we're going down
Yeah we're going down
Yeah we're going down
All the right moves, hey
Yeah, we're going down
All the right moves, hey
Yeah, we're going down"
~"All the right moves" by One Republic
Elizabeth hated, just when they were about to get to the good part, that Fleming had to come into their rooms running like a mad man. His face had turned completely pale, like he had just seen a ghost!
"The Lady Mary" said Fleming totally out of breath after running three hallways to reach his master's chambers. "Sh-she has gone into labor"
~o~
It took them longer than usual to dress. They were advised, Eustace by Fleming and Elizabeth by her ladies that Fleming brought up, not to arrive together but they did not listen.
Eustace had to report everything to his master and Elizabeth was her sister, it was important they be there for the birth of Mary's children, if she was indeed carrying the twin boys the astrologer predicted.
Elizabeth mentally shook her head at her father's insistence to use astrologers and other type of charlatans to guess for the child or children's gender. It was stupid and only served to prove the King was insecure about himself and his offspring –in this case Mary.
They raced through the halls of Greenwich palace until they finally reached her sister's bedchamber. It had not been a painful birth as everyone believed it would be, taking into account the Duchess of Bavaria's delicate health. She had come as her mother during the battle of Flodden against the Scots, a powerful warrior battling against her own body and willing herself not to fall victim to exhaustion.
When they got there, her father and stepmother were already there waiting to tell the late pair the gender of Mary's children. So the prophecy of twins had been correct -partially.
The royal nobles did not have twin boys as they expected but they were blessed at least with one.
Elizabeth entered her sister's chamber followed by Eustace who bowed deeply in the presence of Their Majesties (ignoring the others, among them Mary's husband for he could not think of him as anything else) and in his master's name expressed his deep joy of hearing the Duchess of Bavaria had done her duty to her sovereign lord and husband.
Jane Seymour gave a quick nod. There was more to the Imperial Ambassador than met the eye. There was a remarkable sadness that showed in his eyes that he was not able to mask -this time. Jane wondered how he would react when he saw the child. "I imagine your master would like you to be present to report on the well being of the children" Jane commented and Eustace nodded once more. She was nothing but the daughter of a simple man but her mother possessed royal blood and so did she. Her royal heritage showed in her incredible discretion and ability to ignore all of her husband's flaws. Some said that His Majesty married her for love, others because she reminded him so much of his own mother, passive and meek Elizabeth daughter of York. But Eustace could see that she was much more than the passive, meek and docile female consort. He had spent his whole life studying people and become a good masker himself, he knew a mask when he saw one.
"My master would be very pleased and joyful" he repeated as the queen opened the Duchess' bedchamber."If you excuse me" he curtsied once he entered.
Elizabeth was already inside holding what he guessed was Mary's joy and triumph, her son.
"What will you name him?" Elizabeth asked as she battled to keep the babe silent, a task she was failing miserably. She gave the boy back to Mary. The sisters looked at each other and it took Mary a while to answer. "Henry after our father" She said quietly. Her gaze looked up to Eustace finally acknowledging his presence. There were so many things she wanted to say to this man. Did he believe she was ignorant to the world around her?
"Excellency" she said coldly and with a coldness that matched hers he responded as well. -"Your Grace" he said giving a quick curtsy.
Elizabeth could feel the air growing hotter, if she didn't do something they would be throwing insults at each other. "Where is the girl?" She asked. Eustace gave a small smile, his eyes bore pride at the younger sister something that made Mary incredibly jealous and if possible there were fumes coming from her ears. "She is in the bassinet there" she said waving her hand to the small bassinet next to her, the way she did it seemed to Eustace as if she could care less for her other child. Strange -Lady Mary loved all children, he would have thought she would not care for the child's gender, but perhaps having the little boy, her little triumph in her arms had changed her.
Elizabeth picked up the small babe and cradled her in her arms. She was a silent baby with her eyes wide opened, eyes that made her Aunt shudder for they looked too familiar. The small babe looked at all of her surroundings, she seemed to be well aware of where she was and in whose arms she was in. Unlike her twin brother who was so different from her (he with black hair, green eyes and a perfect carbon copy of Philip, while she bore the signature of the Tudors, red hair, perfect white skin -the only thing different in this baby were her eyes they were wide, almond shaped and bright gray not dark like her sister's) this little one was easier to please and didn't make a big fuzz.
Mary kept looking at Eustace who remained well composed. What she would tell him now would change and hurt him, she would make sure she left a mark on his heart from which he would NEVER recuperate.
"What is her name?" Elizabeth asked while Eustace was thinking of his new life with her. Mary was part of the past, the way she was treating him made him more grateful that he didn't have to deal with her, except when his master obliged him, all the time. He was happy that he chose the younger and more practical of the Tudors.
"Anne ... Anne Elizabeth, I thought it would be a nice way of patching things up between them. After all Jesus told us to forgive and as good Christians I also wants us to be good sisters again" she said surprising everyone in the room including Eustace who widened his eyes. No, he suddenly thought looking down at his feet. I can't go on with Elizabeth, Mary means the world to her and vice-verse. I can't separate their good friendship over my feelings for her.
Mary not quite done with Eustace suddenly asked in a cutting edge tone "Did you sleep well last night Excellency?"
Eustace looked up furrowing his eyebrows, completely confused. Yes he did sleep well last night, VERY WELL.
Mary smirked at his answer. He really believed she was ignorant, how naive! "You think I didn't recognize my sister calling your name when I went to ask for you last night and Fleming told me you were alone?" She asked with a hint of irony.
Eustace squeezed his hands into fists. "That My Lady is none of your business" he said neutrally.
"You know Excellency dear old friend, you are right, very right it is not. However" she paused turning to her sister who held her daughter, and then to Eustace again. "I once heard that if a whore were to lay with a man twice on the same week she could beget two sons in this case one son and daughter from him. I think it is devil's work but when I first gave birth to my daughter, or should I say our daughter, I saw the devil acts even in the noblest of souls. I was really worried the other one would turn just like you but when he was born I could see it in his eyes, his beautiful dark hair and chubby cheeks he was all Philip."
Had he not been a man trained to handle these types of situations he would have yelled at her, called her various foul names. "You think I care?" He laughed at her, at the irony of it all showing no care for Mary or for his so called daughter whatsoever. "You think I really care?" He asked again.
"Poor child marked by the devil himself" Mary said in an effort to provoke him. She hated being replaced by another woman and especially when that other woman was her sister "Tell me Excellency, what will you tell my sister when she finds out about her past -"
"She does not have to ask because she knows EVERYTHING. Unlike with you milady I never kept the truth from her and she didn't kept anything from me either" He snapped. He looked up at the child who was in Bess' arms. Elizabeth had walked closer to where he was not believing Eustace had sired this child, but all the evidence was there. The child was her father's carbon copy, her real father. The only thing that differentiated her was the red Tudor hair, but in everything else she was Eustace. Broad shoulders even for a little baby girl like her with perfect white skin, light gray eyes. Her thin cheekbones and chin, even her nose, was all Eustace Chapuys. Eustace saw it too, she was HIS daughter, HIS and Mary's. "I feel pity for her" he said further forgetting the child Elizabeth was holding. "I would not have a child have a mother like you but knowing now she is my daughter I really pity her"
"You do not feel even anything for her?" Mary inquired arching an eyebrow.
"Come on Your Grace am I not supposed to be the insensible, cold, cruel Ambassador. And by the way Your Grace" he paused turning a sardonic smile to her, bowing and giving her a low curtsy that she did not deserve -"I will be sure to tell the Emperor your cousin of your triumph. Congratulations. God bless you and your husband" And at last he left.
He just had to get out of the room.
Oh God! He thought. That child, that child is MINE! What would happen now to that blasted child?
Mary herself did not want to see or hold her, it had to be his Bess the one to calm her down, otherwise Mary would have given her away to Susan or God knows what other maid of hers! God, what have I done? He buried his head in his sweaty palms. There were tears dripping from his eyes but he wasn't sure why he was crying.