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A/N: Thanks to ALL the marvelous reviews.
~VXLP
"If I get burned it will be all on your hands. It is my fault for loving you, for believing all lies
I should have known that you only wanted me as a companion, a sister
because you were not man enough you made me feel I was not woman enough
You show off your love in my face and I can't help but feel empty
wish her death, blame her for you not loving me
but in the end my dear S. it is all your fault
and mine for falling for a cheap jewel like you
~"Dear S." by Anonymous
1552, March 1st.
Nonsuch Palace: Banquet Hall
Annie hardly noticed anyone of the wanderers in her uncle's court. They were all too familiar faces. She paid them no heed, there was only one face that captured her attention and that person was currently busy talking to his betrothed. Isabella and Alexei.
They already seemed like an odd couple. "Six months, four if she grows fat after she delivers" She had made a wager with her brother that they would not last.
Anthony had shaken his head and said "One only needs a glance to see that Isabella is very committed to Alexei, and he is not but he feigns rather well. Leave it sister, there are more fish in the pond." There would never be other fish in the pond, she'd had her eye set on Alexei from the start, and her mother like on so many occasions, had ruined her chances of happiness.
Did the woman really hate her or was it more a feeling of injustice? Annie had what her mother thought should be rightfully hers. A loving father, and a family who loved and took care of her despite not being her full blooded family.
Eustace had been told to bring only his children and Anthony would be their chaperone, but he had written back humbly declining, he had used the excuse of rebellion in the north threatening to reach the south where he and his wife resided, to move his entire family to court. Edward could deny his request and exercise his authority over Annie's father, but that would have made him look bad in Annie's eyes and he certainly could not afford that. Though, Annie could barely look at him after he had refused Alexei's request to have her instead of her sister as his wife.
Annie did not care for power or glory, she just wanted to feel love and safe. Only two men made her feel that way, and she was currently without, lost forever because of her enemies and a jealous King who cared only of himself, and the other had her on a tight leash never loosing sight of where she went or looked at.
Her father should know better than to check on her. She was his daughter, she knew better than to fall for Edward's charm. It wasn't Edward though that made Eustace worried but that her infatuation over Alexei would make her create a scene. Sometimes he regretted what he did, but it was for the best, Annie deserved better than to be in the middle of intrigue. He did not want her to suffer any longer, good Lord knows -he thought -my daughter deserves better.
"We touch I feel a rush
We clutch it isn't much
But it's enough to make me wonder whats in store for us
It's lust, it's torturous
You must be a sorceress 'cause you just
Did the impossible
Gained my trust don't play games it'll be dangerous
If you fuck me over
'Cause if I get burnt imma show you what it's like to hurt
'Cause I been treated like dirt before you
And love is "evol"
Spell it backwards I'll show you
Nobody knows me I'm cold
Walk down this road all alone
It's no one's fault but my own
It's the path I've chosen to go
Frozen as snow I show no emotion whatsoever so
Don't ask me why I have no love for these motherfucking hoes
Bloodsucking succubus, what the fuck is up with this?
I've tried in this department but I ain't had no luck with this
It sucks but it's exactly what I thought it would be
Like trying to start over
I got a hole in my heart, I'm some kind of emotional rollercoaster
Something I won't go on 'til you toy with my emotion, so it's over
It's like an explosion every time I hold you, I wasn't joking when I told you
you take my breathe away
You're a supernova... and I'm a
I'm a space bound rocket ship and your heart's the moon
And I'm aiming right at you
Right at you
250 thousand miles on a clear night in June
And I'm aiming right at you
Right at you
Right at you
I do whatever it takes
When I'm with you I get the shakes
My body aches when I ain't
With you I have zero strength
There's no limit on how far I would go
No boundaries, no lengths
Why do we say that until we get that person that we thinks
Gonna be that one and then once we get 'em it's never the same?
You want them when they don't want you
Soon as they do feelings change
It's not a contest and I ain't on no conquest for no mate
I wasn't looking but I stumbled onto you must've been fate
But so much is at stake what the fuck does it take
Let's cut to the chase
But a door shuts in your face
Promise me if I cave in and break and leave myself open
That I won't be making a mistake
I'm a space bound rocket ship and your heart's the moon
And I'm aiming right at you
Right at you
250 thousand miles on a clear night in June
And I'm aiming right at you
Right at you
Right at you
So after a year and 6 months it's no longer me that you want
But I love you so much it hurts
Never mistreated you once
I poured my heart out to you
Let down my guard swear to god
I'll blow my brains in your lap
Lay here and die in your arms
Drop to my knees and I'm pleading
I'm trying to stop you from leaving
You won't even listen so fuck it
I'm trying to stop you from breathing
I put both hands on your throat
I sit on top of you squeezing
'Til I snap you neck like a Popsicle stick
Ain't no possible reason I could think of to let you walk up out this house
And let you live
Tears stream down both of my cheeks
Then I let you just go and just give
And before I put that gun to my temple
I told you this
And I would've done anything for you
To show you how much I adored you
But it's over now
It's too late to save our love
Just promise me you'll think of me every time you look up in the sky and see a star 'cause imma
I'm a space bound rocket ship and your heart's the moon
And I'm aiming right at you
Right at you
250 thousand miles on a clear night in June
And I'm so lost without you
Without you
Without you"
~"Space Bound" by Eminem
Edward sighed. Sadness crept in him. His mother had stayed in bed, he had sent her his physicians, but the fever continued. The Archbishop Cranmer and the Bishop of Lincoln promised him that all the country was praying for a fast recovery, but Edward knew better than to believe in their lies. Half of his Protestant peers in Parliament and the Privy Council had never overlooked the fact that his mother had overstepped her boundaries. From a simple merchant's daughter with little royal blood flowing in her veins unlike her predecesor, she had not hesitated to marry Edward's father when this one proposed on the day Anne Boleyn died. Her body was not yet cold when his father ate from the wedding present the Seymour family's cook had prepared for him. His father had turned a blind eye when it came to Edward's sisters, but it did not matter to the people. His father went down in history as a tyrant to Catholics and Protestants alike, but as a humanitarian to the general populace who valued more the works of charity he and his wives did than the salvation of their souls.
Jane Seymour will be the lamb to the slaughter, while the tyrant will reign for a thousand years more and be remembered as something more than a King, man, or saint, he will be regarded as a God. What would his fate be though? Edward wondered. How will history remember him? Would it remember him by his fanatic approach to religion, by his good works, the money he gave to the universities, or by the future sons he begot coming from the womb of the woman he had his eyes on?
She danced beautifully, and he was very sad that she was not alone this time. Anthony, and if it was not Anthony it was someone else from the Chapuys lot, that would be with her. Edward was mesmerized by her eyes, they were beautiful, blue, cold and gray like her father's but they had a strange aura around her. She must feel a sorceress because she had done the impossible, burnt through the ice walls he built around his heart. He was called the "son of winter" because his skin was as plain and pale like his mother, and his eyes were as blue like hers, but they were harsh, unyielding, and cold like the winter he had been born in. His birth had nearly cost his mother's life, and her capability to bear more children. What followed after him had been a trail of sorrow. His mother could not bring another child to term.
Annie knew no boundaries, she had been born the opposite of him in a hot day in June. He was Ice, she was fire, and full of life. He squeezed his fingers into his cold palms hidden under the table. If only she could see how much he loved her.
Annie felt very drowsy. "So soon?" She looked startled, SHE was the last person Annie would expect to see.
As usual Mary had a twisted smile on her face seeing her daughter frown. "Dance some more Annie, grace us daughter with your skills, your sister Katherine good Lord she has been asking me about you."
"Really mother?" She asked with a raised eyebrow, disguising her sadness with skepticism as she glanced to her youngest sister next to her mother. Katherine Wittelsbach, the "rose of Bavaria". If Annie was fire, Katherine was the sun. She was a jewel that shined as no other. Yes -she thought- a jewel. A jewel might shine brighter than the sun, her father said, but it offers no warmth.
"Of course" Answered Mary ignoring the glare she received from her nephew Anthony. She turned to her nine year old daughter. "Don't you my little rose?" Katherine nodded, Mary squeezed her hand harder, but drawing affection from her warm skin. "Silly me, I don't even acknowledge you Anthony. Dear nephew how you do, I hear you've become another of Edward's privy councilors, congratulations. It is such a privilege to see one of our own, risen so high" Mary could hide the spite from her voice, but her smile to anyone who didn't know her was of a sweet woman who meant all she was saying.
Anthony had been in the company of men worse than this snake aunt of his. He wasn't intimidated in the very least by her or anyone of her brood. She was jealous because it was not her sweet Henry who got the title of Viscount or a place among the highest ranking members in Edward's privy council.
"You should thank Your Majesty MyLady, he is responsible for my family's success" he said. He was flowing with anger, who was this woman to question him? She had such illusions of having herself set up as queen with her spoiled heir, Henry, to follow that she was blind to reality.
"True, but without your intellect the King would never have noticed, why he would have thought of you no less than some other merchant's son!" She said with a snicker. Katherine unsure what her mother meant simply followed her movements and snickered as well.
Annie elbowed him, seeing the hatred burning in his eyes, before he materialized his thoughts into words.
Anthony's chest heaved up, proof that he'd been offended but one look from his sister whose eyes told him not to, brought him back to reality. He pushed his fingers into his hard skin forming a fist. It always calmed him.
"Annie what do you say sweetheart? Do you care to teach your sister, she has been asking for you all day, hmm?" Her sister's face was hopeful, but Annie could not see past her eyes that were her father's, her true kindness. Composing herself she threw a smile at her mother and ignoring what her sister would feel, she said in a sweet voice "No, but maybe later when my sister becomes as tall as her father, judging by how she is right now I am sorry to say sister you will not get that far" In life and in stature -she thought giving one wink to her mother before she and Anthony returned to their parents.
"Why so serious?" Asked Bess when they arrived.
Anthony began telling them the tale, by the end his parents could not help but shake their heads and mutter how impossible and foolish Mary had been, and praised Annie for using her head rather than letting her anger take control of her like it was about with Anthony.
"It was nothing, I just happen to have a knack to humiliate fools and buffoons"
Eustace chuckled "What I would have given to see your mother's face, I do not think I would have contained myself"
"Of course you would, you are Eustace Chapuys"
"I was, I am afraid I am getting older -"
"Stop that Eustace, you are fine." Bess said shaking her head at her husband. This thing over his old age, she thought it was ridiculous how he concerned himself with these things. She loved him for the man he was, not by how old he was. He should know by now. "You are irritated simply because you will soon have to use two canes instead of one"
"You still will look tall father" George said clasping his hand. Eustace smiled down at his youngest son whose eyes wandered to every courtier, there was one who was his age but she was a girl, and his parents did not let him socialize with his cousins. Pity-he thought, he would like to have people to talk to his age instead of his brothers, who rarely did.
"This is a conspiracy, you are all mocking me"
"Of course dear that is our favorite thing to do" Said Bess, half sarcastic, half honest, and her lips came crashing on his, it was a quick kiss for they knew better, in Edward's court everyone had to show discretion. George rolled his eyes as did his siblings and turned elsewhere, he was terribly bored, just then his eyes caught sight of his cousin Katherine, she threw him a small smile, he threw her a small wave but after that she turned away pulled by her mother who did not seem to please she was not paying attention to what she was saying.
Pity. Back to being on his own. George sighed, it was barely heard. His older siblings loud voices and his parents rejoicing in whatever they were told, blinded them from their younger son's discomfort.
"The dragon's pride has been swallowed" His sister boasted.
"And her little snake will be recoiling today after not getting her wish." Anthony finished for her.
George's mother nodded, it was well known her sister gave everything to Katherine, she was not the daughter she and her husband had desired, but they had been very joyful with her arrival. Eyes as bright as a jewel, the color of emerald, they heard the courtiers say. Her eyes dazzled the entire court, and the little Lady was the envy of all the courtier's daughters none who had eyes as sparkling as hers. She would be a real treat when she grew up, that is if she grew up. Her sister had been sick all the time as a child, beautiful and a real pearl, the envy of everyone including her own ladies, but the years of having to deal with her parents' divorce, and then Bess' mother came along, had been all very rough on her. It was a miracle she had made it this far and delivered three children, three healthy children.
Eustace looked down on George and ruffled the boy's unruly heir. He was taller than boys his age, but shier than most and it worried him that he did not have many friends. "Alright MyLord?" He said with added humor to his last words.
George smiled shyly and nodded, looking at his shoes. He was not Anthony, he was not Annie, everyone of his servants thought that he was too quiet and too odd. They all compared him, those who were old enough to remember and had served under his grandfather -Thomas Boleyn; to his namesake George Boleyn. He didn't want to be compared to no one, he was his own person and he wasn't as wild or vulgar as his uncle had been. He exceeded everyone in his studies, his own tutor had said that he displayed better aptitudes for absorbing books and languages than his siblings at his age. Why couldn't everyone focus on that instead?
Eustace could see he was uncomfortable, he squeezed his hand harder and lean forward, he was grateful all his children were tall so he did not have to do a lot of effort. "You want to retire for the day?" he asked more serious.
George looked numbly at him, he shook his head. "No" He liked it here. There was a lot to learn from the courtiers' expression, a lot that could be useful, he told his father.
Eustace smiled broadly very proud that his son had inherited his passion from learning and his constant vigilance.
"Did I say something funny?"
His father shook his head. "On the contrary son, you are very bright and cautious just like me, though I suggest you should always have a time for privacy" George knitted his brows, tilting his head and looking at his mother for an explanation. Bess smirked and glared at Eustace, he knew better than to be talking like a politician to George. The boy was barely ten! "What he means son is you need to find time for yourself, get to know other people. It is impossible to juggle your studies with friends at the same time, you'd go crazy"
"You don't want to end up miserable and sulk all day in your chambers praying for the Lord to save you from your boredom like your Aunt?" Everyone laughed at Anthony's jest including George though his laughter was barely heard, he did not find his brother's mocking of his aunt very funny.
Annie decided to step in and take the lead "Why don't you come with me tomorrow George, I know some of the dowager queen's ladies will bring their children tomorrow, they are about your age I am sure you can make friends with some of them" George looked unsure, he had all the friends he needed in David, Paul, John, Luther, Aesop, Virgil, and all other ancient characters from the books he read. He didn't do well with real people, it scared him they would consider him odd, but her sister's charm was too powerful for him to shake and he found himself saying "yes" very eagerly.
He was relieved the day was over. His father had not separated himself from Annie, nor her brother. It was near impossible to get a message through her, but when little George had been escaped his parents' watch, he had bumped into one of his soldiers. Such accident he had planned, and being the loving brother that he was to his sister he passed Edward's letter that the soldier had given him to his sister in secret.
He tapped his fingers impatiently. Where was she? It was past midnight she should be here already. He would not put it past Eustace to have his sister sleep in the same bedroom as his intended bride. Edward supported his chin on the heel of his palm as he placed his elbow on the table next to the sofa. He had poured himself two goblets of ale, he was not drunk yet. He hated the taste of ale, but he found it helped with these types of situations where he found himself desperate for company. He had not know the warmth of a woman yet, but he wanted Annie to be his first.
The door opened, it half opened to reveal a single guard. He stepped aside to reveal Annie. The guard bowed to Edward and left them.
"You requested my presence Your Majesty?" She asked kneeling, her eyes never leaving the floor. She was afraid that if she laid eyes on him, it would start a chain of events from where there would be no escape.
He put her fingers on her the tip of her chin and raised her head to him. "Look at me" He said softly, she locked eyes with him. Just as she'd feared she wasn't able to pull back from her trance. Next thing she knew that made her gasp was Edward who on his knees took both her hands in his and kissed her knuckles. She felt herself grow hotter, the air around them was too heavy and it was difficult to breathe. What was he doing? And what was she doing? After he had denied Alexei his request? It was because of him that she had cried for three days in a row for her lost love. She should pull back right now, but something within her did not let her as she felt his face near her and with one light touch from his free hands on her cheeks now, she was his.
Shortly after their kiss that Annie had turned into passionate, ended, he held her hands once and more and whispered in her ears. She could feel her heart beating very fast as he felt his breath on her neck. "Allow me to serve and worship you like Lancelot worshiped Guinevere" He was stealing from his father, but he did not care whatever worked to win Annie's heart. She needed to know that there was no other woman that wielded so much power over him like her.
Annie held her breath, she was stunned. She knew the King lusted for her, but she never thought it went this far. He was not only proposing her to be his lover, she knew that look everywhere, it was the same look her father had for Bess. She bit her lower lip uncertain of what she should say. Alexei was lost and if she refused she would be giving up on the greatest opportunity of her life. If she gave up not only would she have to bear seeing Alexei next to her sister every day until he and his ambassadors moved back to Russia following the Czar's death; she would also see all her prospects of a profitable or not marriage destroyed, because as long as her mother wielded some power Annie's life would be miserable.
Edward cleared all doubts she had on her mind with a soft caress from his pale fingers on her cheek. "Sweet Annie, I will always be faithful for you, I will never hurt you, I will never leave you. You will never find me giving up on your, after me you will become the first person in the land, nobody will challenge you, make your life miserable ever again and if they dare they will answer to me personally"
She smiled weakly, how she yearned to feel secure, to wield some power of her own even if it was through a man, she believed it would solve everything. Annie smiled broadly when her thoughts were settled and feeling his other arm around her waist pull her closer, she said "I believe you"
After all these years fighting to get her attention, she had finally said yes. He had succeeded where Alexei had failed. Edward wanted to take her right now and feel her, her bare skin against his, his manhood against her womanhood and planting his seed in her expectant womb but he was not the kind of man to force himself on a woman. No matter how much desire he had for Annie, he would have to wait.
They kissed one last time as they rose. "Tomorrow lets announce it to the world, you, my future wife, the future queen of England" The word Queen brought in Annie a swirl of thoughts, something she had never felt before, ambition. She shook it off quickly as he felt his lips on her brow, she was numb with the realization that a King of all people, had noticed HER!
Edward led her to her chambers, he promised he would talk to her father personally, it was well known she was not the Duke of Bavaria's daughter, but out of respect for the Lady Mary and her husband nobody said anything. "Goodnight" He said.
"Goodnight ... Edward" She said back very softly, his name came out like a slow purr. It excited him.
In her chambers Annie fell on her knees, her back propped against the door, she could hear him leaving with each footstep the sound became dimmer until it disappeared. She was going to be Mrs. Edward, wife of the King of England. She had to work something out for when her father heard the news, she knew he would be furious, he had worked so hard to protect her but he had to understand that she was not little Annie anymore, she was Anne Elizabeth and more than capable of looking after herself.